The Steadfast Tin Soldier
by SillyWriter430
Summary: Hello! This is my first fic, so please be good! What if Michiru is a psycologist and Haruka is a Major veteran? What if Haruka after serious traumas becomes self destroyer? What if Michiru tries to help her? Will Haruka be able to love and set herself free from her ghosts? And will Michiru also try to get trough her own ghosts? Read to find out! Enjoy it!
1. chapter 1

**Ok, hello everyone! I guess a pair of days ago I didn't even have thought about having the courage to write a fanfic, but here I am now. It's the 27th April, and before writing my own fictions, I'd rather share to you an amazing ff from my point of view. My only job is to translate it from my native language Italian into English. I already talked to its author and I was told it was ok.**

 **This fanfiction is about the amazing couple Haruka-Michiru which is my favourite one in sailor moon, anyway, this is a vary particular and deep fanfic, I read a lot of ff about hXm but never seen one like this one. Actually this was the first ff about hXm I've ever read, so it always will be in my heart. It's still in progress, so maybe updates will be slow, anyway, thanks for reading this long intro, ENJOY THE PLOT. YOU MUST READ THE PLOT BELOW.**

 **The deep wounds of a failure pushed Michiru Kaioh, psychologist specialised in the treatment of veterans, to give up her job, trying to stand at guilt feelings. So not happily she accepts, some years later, to concentrate herself on the case Haruka Tenoh, young Major of the US army who has still to accept the shadow of his own ghosts from the Iraq.**

 **The meeting with Tenoh will give her not little surprises to Michiru but for the medic alike the soldier must start a new begin, a slow walk to come back to normality, destroying certainties and convictions to rebuild on the ruins of lives lived a half, and wounds not completely healed yet. And in the awareness that neither of them can now do without the other.**

 **One last advice: THIS WILL BE AN FF FIC, IF YOU DON'T LIKE DONT READ. RATED IS EXPLICIT BECAUSE THERE WILL BE LEMONS PART AND ROUGH LANGUAGE, IF YOU DON'T LIKE DON'T READ THOSE PARTS. AND PLEASE DON'T BE TOO RUDE THAT'S THE FIST TIME I'M WRITING!**

 **ENJOY THE READING!**

 **DISCLAIMER: I LOVE HM BUT UNFORTUNATELY I DONT OWN THEM (sad sad) NEITHER SM, THEY ALL BELONG TO NAOKO TAKEUCHI, LIKE THIS STORY IS OWNED BY HYPATIA_OF_ALEXANDRIA.**

 **PROLOGUE**

 _53 km to Tikrit_

 _Iraq,_

 _2008_

I have been waken by iced water. A rough lashing, right on my face.

I close my eyes, blinded by the bright light which overwhelms me; words melted with whispers, my ears still shocked because of the explosion. The explosion. Is it possible, that after what happened, I survived just like that?

A movement behind me brings me on the earth again. I shout of pain, the drawn on the arm which makes me understand I have a serious trauma to my left shoulder. Maybe it's sprained. No, it's broken. Four strong hands holds me from my wrists, arms tensed toward the dusty floor. The pain deleted all my tireness, and I can see around me: they are six, who looks over us from head to toes, laughing at me and my kneeling position. The American kneeling ahead them.

That's the end they want to make us. All of them. Four of them have a McGuire, the others two kalashnikov. One of them, who has a long scar all over his eye, scratches his chin and sends hungry looks over another shape at the other side of the room, far from where I am. My blood stops when I recognise her, and I can see in her eyes her fear because of my shouting.

They see I'm awake again, and one of my prisoners make me look up.

One of them slapped me, the other one spits me, the others just laughed.

Bastard motherfuckers, laughs good who laughs at the end, I thought. Telling it aloud would have just make their ego grow up, because even if I know not all of them would understand, I know at least one of them will. In fact after a while one of them with the kalashnikov asked me:

"Do you know this woman?" Translated me one with a strong Arabian accent, who seems the younger while he pointed the frightened girl on the floor.

"No" is my only answer. I even shake my head. The one who seems to be the leader spoke to him pointing me and the girl.

"Even if she took you out of that place where our brothers shahid are dead to set us free from people like you."

I think again about what happened. I remember a little bit because the darkness overwhelms my mind. "I don't know her, I said."

I look at her right into the eyes, seeing her shocked features.

God, don't look at me like that!

A pair of them laugh at the scene, and the leader speaks to her. I don't understand, but when I see the men pointing at me, I can tell they're Mekong her the same question they did to me. Her look falls on the mask which is my face. The mask which could save her life. I see her shaking her head, then the other one keeps asking more rudely.

He points at me again and again. They stay quiet for a moment, then the leader walks toward me. After some seconds I have is gun pointing at my head. A thrill runs towards my back, but I keep quiet.

Her eyes instead, are wide open because of the terror. Then he speaks again:

"I'd you don't know him, we can shoot him then?" A sadic smile appears on his face.

But she doesn't stand at it. She's not a soldier, she's not trained for this situations, she cries, while she walks toward me.

No! No!

She said into sobs. One of them started moving to stop her, but someone tells him not to. The gun is still on my head, when she started crying into my dirty uniform, I understand it's over. She can't save herself no more. And she knows it too. Our prisoners laughs, I see one of them taking his McGuire off, followed by one who did the same with his kalashnikov. I can't speak. She does it for me, whispering to me. They take her off of me, throwing her to the wall. The push on my back becomes stronger, the pain on my shoulder almost at the top. A pair of hands takes my head turning it to face her, then they put a knife on my throat. The gun doesn't leave me. I can't move, I can't even shut my eyes.

The horror frightens me, I can't stand at it, i bit my lips making them bleed.

"Slide my throat!" I say while I feel like throwing it all out "slide this fucking throat! Just kill me!"this time I shout, and she hears it too, whispering a weak 'No'

I feel tears in my eyes.

If hell does really exists isn't far from this.

 **My notes: I told you that was a sad story, so if you are moral weak don't keep reading, it'll be a bit more rough later.**

 **PLEASE GUYS LET ME KNOW IF YOU AGREE WITH ME KEEPING POSTING ABOUT THIS FIC AND LET ME KNOW IF YOU LIKE IT! REMEMBER TO LEAVE A REVIEW AND IF YOU WANT CONTACT ME, UNTIL NEXT TIME THIS IS MILLA23**

 **P.S. let me know if there is any spelling mistake!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything at all, I'm just translating :)**

 **This chapter is dedicated to my first reviewer PokemonSoulMaster93 ;) and to anyone who is still interested in reading this fic, thanks guys!**

 **Chapter 1: GHOSTS**

 _Operation "Iraqi Freedom"_

 _100th Battalion, 442nd Infantry Headquarter_

 _13 km north-east from Mosul,_

 _Iraq,_

 _2004_

The only sound you could heard, into the room, was the one of the pen running trough the paper sheet to leave its mark. Grade, surname, name, manuscripts of the Arial's preprinted letters on the document. How many other inner dispositions did she still have to print, before the coming of the driver put an end at this torture?

The knock at the door made her hope.

"Go ahead" she said to the unknown, while she was putting the last paper just marked at its place and spinning the pen to close it.

Unfortunately, the feature which compared wasn't the one of her driver, instead it was one of her men. She watched him while he stands on the attention and introduced himself, then he put on the desk a paper sheet. Another one, she couldn't help but think about that.

"I need your signature on the license permit, Major" said the guy, rigid on his position that was good to use while talking to a superior. She looked at him for a while, hands clasped on the desk.

"This could have also been done by the next responsible, Sergeant. No one would have left you without your license." A slide grin appeared on her lips.

The other one struggled " I just wanted to be sure, sir."

"Take a sit" she told him, while she read the document: she never signs without reading first. The soldier sits down, letting his gaze wondering around the room: the timber library, which reminds of the previous owner of this place, that right now is owned by the 100th Battalion; the decorations on the ceiling, the Iraq's map, behind the Major, there were a lot of X and arrows multicoloured. And then, next to it, a small handbag. The young man looked up at the figure in front of him, wearing not the simple camouflage suit -like the one he was actually wearing- but an official one: the grey/green shirt, on which was put a tie of the same colour and a jacket buttoned on the chest, where could be seen the degrees and the name.

"So it's true, you are going away." He couldn't help but ask. Two emerald eyes crossed the blue ones.

"Seems so." She answered him. And before he could ask for more she anticipated his next question. "Tikrit."

"Crap" the other one said " in the Sunni triangle."

She just nodded.

"It's pretty a mess there" kept the sergeant as if he was thinking aloud.

"Not more that there is in other zones, Bassora, Fallujah, Kirkuk. Mosul itself. If God forgets about you, He doesn't makes exceptions" said with a bitter smile on her lips.

"When are you going to set off, sergeant?" She said moving the topic from herself to the other one, who seems to brighten up.

"Next Monday."

"How long?"

"Tree months."

She looked up and saw the soldiers eyes bright of joy. When he kept talking she understood why.

"I just got married, I've been more time in Iraq than with my wife!" He said laughing.

"It's a condition common to many." She said smiling a bit. She spins the pen to sign, having almost finished reading.

She didn't know that fragiles embankments had been broken.

"Can't wait to see her again, she is my family obviously" started again the sergeant, "she's a doctor, you know, Major? A researcher doctor, being precise, I met her..."

 _God, when is my car coming?_ She thought being less tolerant to the Amarcord of the sergeant in front of her. _It would have been almost better signing a stack of sheet,_ she ended sighing, while the other kept talking... "and she accepted! Oh then there is my..."

Then she lifted up a hand, and he immediately stopped.

"Did I ask you to tell me your whole life, sergeant?"

The guy slightly blushed, then lowered his gaze. "I'm sorry Major, I was just so happy."

She signed the sheet and then gave it back to the guy.

"I understand that, I forgive you. Now, don't take as an offence, but my car should be there anytime, so..."

The other one just nodded, standing up from the chair, holding into his hands the precious piece of sheet. On the door, though, suddenly turned around to look at the Major, who was still sitting on her desk. The heels of the amphibians touched each other and the hand went to rest on his forehead.

"It has been an honour having been under your orders, Major Tenou. Hope to see you soon."

She sighed, when she was the only person into the room. She sands up and after loosening a bit the tie knot, she put the hands into the trousers pockets, and she went toward the window, putting her forehead on it.

No family was waiting for her to come back. The Army was her only bond. The Duty and the Honour of her brothers. There was nothing else, beside the army, the hated uniform. She saw into the horizon a 4X4 appearing. She stands up, tiding her tie, she put those thoughts on a remote side of her mind, where she used to keep them, and after taking the necessary documents, she took her handbag and went out from that place, which had been for the last 10 month, the most similar place to _home_ she has ever had.

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _April 2008_

When she woke up, the first thing she did was to open her eyes and have a look at her clock: the digital numbers kept telling her that it was 6:32AM. She stayed in the bed, putting aside the sheets which fell on her chest, and sighing she brought her palm on her face. She had been sleeping for almost three hours. And the bad dreams came back. That always happens when that day was coming closer, _that day._

She stands up and, taking an old sweater left on the chair next to the door, she went toward the bathroom. When she watched herself at the mirror, she said:

"God Michiru, you are a rag..." she muttered, to the aqua haired girl and blue eyed rimmed by deep eye bags. She hoped that a shower could help her and below the warm water, she started to think about a way to delete those ugly eye bags: no, this wouldn't have been enough, this time. She thought about her oil tempera. So she got dressed gathering her hair in a towel, looking forward to drying them later. Walking towards her flat, she gathered clothes and random objects, trying to tidy up a primordial disorder. She turned on the kettle and while she was waiting for the right time for the water to warm up, she took a yoghurt and an apple from the fridge.

Considering she still have some time before _someone_ would decide to wake up she entered into the room near hers and took her music sheets with a pencil. She came back into the kitchen and she started drinking her tea while eating an apple, she started reading the melody in the sheets, thinking about correcting any eventual mistake.

She was getting on the car, the babies voices greeting their mums, when her phone rung. She smiled seeing the known number:

"Good morning, doctor Chiba."

She could almost see he smile at the other side of the phone. "Hey Michiru, am I bothering you?"

"Of course not. I was just heading back home." She leaned against her car putting her phone between chin and shoulder, starting to search for her chains in her bag. "What's the honour?"

"Usako and me would like to take you for a dinner."

Michiru smiles. "And you call me at 9:00 am to tell me that?"

"You know Usa, she would have make my head a balloon if I hadn't done it before lunch, so I decided to put you at the top of the list of calling for today."

She shook her haed, "Stop that, you love her just for the way she is."

"Hey don't psychoanalyse me, remember I'm still a superior!"

"You _were"_ she suddenly corrected him while she climbed into the car "anyway, it's ok I'll bring some whine, it has just opened a whine bar near my house so..."

"There is still something else, Michiru."she heard him interrupting her. And she didn't like the tone too. " I'd like you to come here, in hospital, just some minutes."

"When?"

"Right now, if you can."

Michiru stayed quiet. "Mamoru, I..."

"I just want to talk to you about a thing, it won't last long."

Michiru thought about that. Than she sighed. "It's ok."

The Military hospital "Edward Dewenish Veterans Affair Medical Centre", settled in Portsmouth, was very near to the beach. To come in it was necessary walk toward the block position, something really boring but strictly necessary if you didn't want to finish in custody of beefy soldiers of the US navy, who often considered their turns to the Military Hospital like their Purgatory. Points which would have brought them to their Paradise: the Iraq. Or the Afghanistan. Or whatever it was, but anything which will preserve them a place on a war ship, singing the American sings, hand on the heart.

Why they were seeing the Iraq as a paradise, she still couldn't understand. She understood their duty, the loyalty towards the USA. And the patriotic feeling born from the ashes of the World Trade Center, that 11 September a lot of years before, which brought a lot of them to the army. But that desire of go away, of going to an hot front like the Afghanistan, or the Iraq... for a lot whom she had been talking she understood they thought it was a kind of proof, initiation rite. As in certain primitive cultures, where young people face ferocious beasts to earn the status of man. For many, going down there was really becoming - and finally - man, looking into the eyes of the beast that was the war.

"Documents please."

Michiru stopped at the guardroom's bar and handed the Identity card to the white-headed boy with a shaved head who had asked the question. There were no more Stewart and Johnatan, the two cadets who let her through after showing the internal doctor's card. He wondered how many things had changed.

"Doctor Chiba is waiting for me," she told the soldier, that was writing fast her dates, but he still didn't stop. After a while she sees him looking up at her, handing her back her identity card and a card.

"When you go away you have to give me back this" he said and smiled.

"I know, I've been working there too."

Then Michiru went to a big car park, where she found a place with ease: a military hospital never had the workload of a civilian equal. At the entrance she found that nothing, at least at the structural and furnishing level, had changed. The windows in the atrium let the spring sun come in, illuminating it in its entirety. She walked towards the elevators, directed to the wing E: the psychiatric ward. When the elevator doors opened, she headed for a salon where they were passing two nurses and a boy with a drip in his arm. A young patient in a wheelchair looked at her as if she had an alien crouched on her shoulder, whistling her his own appreciation. Michiru shook her head, and took a long corridor that ended in a white door, like everything else around her. She ran a hand through her hair and knocked, before entering. The view opened to the familiar office, and to the equally familiar figure of the man with short black hair and blue eyes that now looked at her.

"Michiru! You're fast." Mamoru greeted her standing up from the chair and hugging her. When they sat down Michiru could see some sheets and on one of them there was written _Confidential._

The mind returned to the entire days spent in that same office, she, Mamoru and all the staff, discussing the most delicate cases or how to face yet another cut of subsidies. She tried not to think about the last time he had been in that room, but it was inevitable. She heard Mamoru speak, but did not understand what he had asked for.

"What?"

"I just asked you how are you."

"Oh I'm great!" She lied. And the other one didn't believe her.

"Define 'great'?"

"Ehi now who psychoanalysis whom?" Michiru answered before making him smile. Then she sighed.

"I'm playing a lot, lately. My concert is just next week. I can't complain, it takes my mind busy."

"I'm glad." He said genuinely smiling her, " instead what abo-"

"Listen Mamoru, go straight to the point," said Michiru, "tell me what you wanted to tell me."

The other one kept quiet fro a moment, they could only hear they sound of the 'tic-tack' of the clock on the wall. "I'd like you to come back working for me."

Michiru tried to hide her surprise, but failed "eh?!"

"It just came a case which has the maximum priority, at home, with a letter from Washington, at 5am."

The girl was even more surprised but she started to give a sense to that ' _Confidential'._ Especially when Mamoru put it between them both. He took a sheet of paper putting it in front of Michiru who started reading.

"Tenou Haruka" muttered "this name isn't unknown to me."

"His father is the General Takeshi Tenoh." He answered her.

 _Ah now that's clear._ So that's the reason why they crashed into your house in the early morning, with a letter of daddy directly from the General Staff."

"It's not a simple recommendation, if that's what you think. Who do you think I am? You know I do not easily bend these things, "Mamoru burst out, and Michiru nodded, if there was one thing she could be sure of, it was the moral integrity of Dr. Mamoru Chiba, head of the psychiatric ward. now, and he could not put one on it, but both hands on the fire. She felt guilty for thinking of it.Mamoru handed her another sheet. From the header and the date on the top left, she interpreted it as the current medical record of this Tenou.

"Is he already recovered here?"

"Yes, he is."

"Crap!"she told when she read the administration of the medicines " this would end a bull in a coma!"

"Tenou doesn't sleep, in the night. And when he does it without those, he shouts."

Michiru shook her forehead but didn't answer. Mamoru kept talking "we aren't talking about a _daddy's child,_ we're talking about a person who is very ill."

Michiru came back on the first document Mamoru handed her. "He's a graduated, a Major." The other nodded.

"Hundredth Battalion?"asked the girl

"He led the 100th in Iraq?"

"Yup." Mamoru understood the implications of this question and quickly added: "but it's not sure that they have known each other, do you know how many others had been there too?"

Michiru didn't feel better. But she regained her colour. "No. I can't do it, Mamoru."

She threw the paper on his desk, rising from her chair as if it had been glowing. The man is raised in turn. "Michiru, yes, you can do it, I will not give you such a delicate affair if I do not believe in your ability." He put his hands on her shoulders, and he felt her tremble. He looked for it.

"Why me?" Mamoru heard her asking him.

"Because you have to react, because you can not continue to blame yourself."

"I do not blame myself!"

"So why did you leave?" Michiru bit her lip, without answering.

"You know why, I had the little girl to think about." They tell him after a long moment.

"How much time has passed, three years?"

"Two years and eight months." It was the girl's automatic response.

"So I think it's time for an affront, Michiru." Mamoru returned to the desk and tidied the file on Tenou. Then he handed it to his friend.

"Read it all."

"I can not read it, it's confidential, said, pushing the file to the man in mid-air between them.

"I know, but I want you to read it all the same, and then, knowing the facts, you will give me an answer that I will accept without objecting." Mamoru gave her a bright smile as she dropped the file into her hands, and opened the door.

"You can go to your old office, no one will disturb you. See you in a pair of hours."

It was already done one o'clock at night, and the apartment was immersed in silence except for the fast typing of Michiru on the keys of her laptop. The light of the screen illuminated her face, and that together with a small lamp placed on a low table next to the sofa where the girl sat, constituted the only two sources of light in the dark room. Next to her, scattered on the sofa, lay the sheets of the file on Major Haruka Tenou. Michiru stopped writing and rubbed her eyes, then reached for the same table where the lamp was and grabbed a portable recorder. It had taken all afternoon to find him. Resting her head against the back, her gaze turned to the ceiling, she pushed the red button of the recording. " _Michiru Kaioh, 1.12 am on April 19, 2008. In a few hours I will return to the Portsmouth Military Hospital, to take care of a case after almost three years, as Mamoru did to convince me, it's really a mystery._ " She smiled, in the dark, before continuing. " _The patient is Haruka Tenou, born on 27 January 1980 in Washington DC, United States Army Major, who returned from Iraq on 12 February this year and resigned from the" Edward Dewenish Veterans Affair Medical Center. "after a successful surgery, without major problems ..."_ Michiru paused, and lifted one of the photos of Tenou's file with one of his free hand: one of those attached to the Virginia Beach Police Department report. " _Mamoru says this case will also help me." Therapy in therapy. He also said that it will be stimulating, from a strictly professional point of view, because with Tenou nothing is what it seems._ " She closed his eyes, before concluding his first report. " _But if I have to be honest, I think I'm making a big mistake."_ That night Michiru could not sleep. And in the only moment when she fell asleep, she dreamed of Mitsuo.

 **Author's note: Ouch, that really was tiring, 3k words! XD I'm happy! Anyway I know this chapter seems quite boring, but it's important to understand future explaining, I think I can be proud of the looong work of writing I did today, and of course hope you liked it too.**

 **Of course in this chapter we learned just the basics to the next happenings, which will surprise us for sure, but I won't tell you anything more! Thanks for reading, until next time, this is Milla23 ;)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Here we are, we are about to see the meeting with our 'best man'**

 **ENJOY THE CHAPTER!**

Impregnable fortresses

 _Military Hospital "Edward Dewenish VA medical centre"_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _19 April, 2008_

 _Day 1_

When she came in what, once, had been her own office, Michiru was feeling as if she hadn't never stopped working.

Some faces were changed, maybe some schedules, but for her it was as if those three years had never passed. Of course the room was all tidied up and smelled of cleaning, the moquette had been changed and those portraits on the walls were no more there, like when she put them there.

But the familiarity she had with this place overwhelmed her and she just hoped she didn't have to be overwhelmed by those remembering.

She took a deep breath, then she approached to her desk putting her things there. With Mamoru, in the end, they had come down to a compromise: thanks to the rigid administration of the hospital, which could offer a contract not exceeding four months for the re-admission of Michiru, they decided that at the end of that period the girl would decide on what to do.

If she really had been able to solve the case, very well. But if Mamoru had overestimated her - and she was convinced - this four-month exploit in Middle-earth between her own psyche and Major Tenou had led to a mere de facto nothing, the contract would have been torn up. Friends as before, toasting 'to health' during one of the dinners with his friend and his wife Usagi. So what was the point in giving a personal touch to that room, if in four months' time, in all likelihood, would she leave?

The door being knocked stopped her thoughts.

The first thing she saw was a hand holding a cup of something, coffee maybe. Remembering about the same routine she had at the place time ago, she hoped, prayed that that hand weren't owned by the body and the face she thought.

By her dismay, it was immediately denied.

"Back coffee, 9:30am, like the old times." Said the man with short brown hair and grey eyes while handing the cup to Michiru. She accepted showing her brightest smile. Or better her false smile.

"Samuel..."

"Welcome back Michiru, I couldn't believe it when they told me that."

Dr. Samuel Foster was another member of the Dewenish psychiatric wing. He was only a couple of years older than her, and it was no mystery to anyone that handsome Foster - a past as a football player and a brief modeling experience to pay for his studies - had taken a loud wave for the charming doctor Kaioh. It was no mystery even for the same Michiru, who had tried in every way to make others understand that was not her type, and that there was really no need to bring her coffee every morning. Then the thing had happened, she had fired herself and in three years he had sometimes looked for her. In all honesty, Michiru hoped he would not work there anymore, since Foster still did not was the type that interested her. To be honest, she was no longer sure what her type was, exactly, since her social life and sexual one had been the last of her thoughts in recent years. But the moment she had seen the glass of coffee she had understood that her hopes were practically dead, and she only prayed that her patience would not have the same end.

"You look good." Said Samuel looking at her colleague's mise which was made by a light blue shirt and a grey skirt, then he added: "you are a fairy tale."

"You always are the usual adulator Samuel. You didn't change."

Michiru turned away from her colleague and put on the gown she had left hanging from the coat hanger.

"If you don't mind I'd go, I don't want my patient to wait for me."

"Sure. I'll come with you."

 _Shit..._ mentally cursed Michiru, while with paper sheet and coffee in her hands she started walking toward the office with Samuel.

"Why did you come back?" Asked him not bothering to go away.

"Doctor Chiba needed me, so here I am."

Samuel smiles. "Who's your patient?"

"Major Tenou."

"Mm, wow. Doctor Chiba sent you in the lion's jail, uh?"

Michiru smiles. " guess you already know him."

"I had a session there a few days after he got in. He was pretty badly dressed, I understand he was involved in a fight down in Virginia Beach." 'I assure you that he has given more', thought Michiru, returning with her mind to the record contained in the Tenou file. So, according to praxis, the Major had already done psychoanalysis, but only she and Mamoru knew the details well.

"I'm sure he deserved them all."

"Excuse me?"

"He is very unpolished, arrogant, full of himself."

They just got to the room 4 where was supposed to be the meeting between Michiru and the Major Tenou.

"Good luck, then." Samuel wished her, and while he was trying to kiss her cheek, she quickly hurried into the room closing the door without bothering to answer him.

And once she was in, she saw him.

Standing next to the reinforced glass window overlooking the bay stood the figure of Major Tenou. He was giving her the back, and he kept his hands tucked into the pockets of faded jeans; he wore a black sweatshirt with which she could see the hood, and from the curved pose she deduced that his forehead was resting on the glass.Michiru opened her mouth to speak and break the ice, but she did not have time. A low, slightly hoarse voice reached her ears. "You should get rid of that one there, you will not be able to sneak away forever."

She watched Tenou straighten up to break away from the window, and the first thing that struck her was the physique, thin but clearly athletic. The second was the height, which she estimated at no less than six feet. Was it possible that this lanky boy was able to do what she had read and seen in the police report photos?

"As?" Asked Michiru, intrigued by that statement. Tenou turned, and looked her straight in the eye. Michiru immediately registered the magnetic intensity of that emerald look; then she expanded the spectrum of analysis. Tenou's face was flawless, except for a small dark spot at the left cheekbone that she interpreted as the aftermath of the fight. The delicate features, almost feminine in some respects, made him undoubtedly fascinating. The short blond hair assumed, in the reflection of the sun, a shade so clear as to make them look almost white, and Michiru blamed that very clear coloration to the months spent in the Iraqi sands. But what struck her most, on the whole, were Tenou's eyes. Because if in a moment they were of an unbearable intensity, and a flash of amazement - or something else, which she could not identify - he had just raised his eyebrows as light as his hair, now they were veiled with a cold indifference that it was also extended to the rest of the face.

"The one who walked with you, since the way he wished you good luck. And probably he even tried to kiss you judging by the way you ran in there."

Michiru was sincerely surprised. Then shook her head, put the coffee on the nearest table lifting her hand toward her patient introducing herself.

"I'm the doctor Kaioh, your psychologist. Nice to meet you."

The other one stood at attention. "Major Tenou Haruka," he introduced himself then handed his hand shaking the smaller one of the doctor aqua heired, "at your service."

When they give up the hold, she noticed the peculiarities of his hands. They were long, tanned and calloused.

She sits down and found for the other one a chair in front of her.

"You should be the _prodigal son"_ said Tenoh making her look up from her notes, "the one who is back after a lot of years."

Michiru looked surprised. "How did you know that?"

"I've never had trouble getting information if I'm interested in something."

"And what would be the object of your interest?" "My health, and therefore, by extension, you." The girl smiled. "I must be flattered, then."

"I would not be if I were in your place, and you were me." She heard herself be answered. Michiru registered a bit of bitterness as Tenou spoke, which disappeared as it had arrived.

"Why do not you tell me a little about you, Major?" Michiru proposed, crossing her legs and placing her hands clasped on her knee. She watched the other rest his head on the back of the chair and look at the ceiling, tapping his fingers on the armrests. "Where were you born, where you grew up"

"They say you came back thanks to Dr. Chiba." Tenou interrupted her, still staring at the wall above them. "Well, that's it."

"You did not understand. They say she's back thanks to the fact that Dr. Chiba is fucked by you." Michiru remained stunned. But after a moment she composed herself.

"They also say you're an arrogant rude, full of yourself." Tenou raised his head and looked into her eyes. Green on Blue. Then he smiled.

"Well, mine is true, yours?"

"Dr. Chiba is happily married, his wife is my friend." "As if it were a reason ... I saw people selling their mother, a sordid story among colleagues would not disturb me too much."

"Well, put your heart in peace, because the sordid story, as it calls it, does not exist."

"If you say so." Now Tenou looked at her amused. "Do you repeat your name, please?"

"Kaioh, Michiru Kaioh."

"Michiru Kaioh ..." he repeated, looking back at the ceiling.

"Not exactly a Virginia name."

"Like Tenou, on the other hand."

"I assume your a Sansei like me, then."

"You assume well." They remained silent, then Michiru heard him repeat her name again. She saw the blow start and prepared to receive it. "Do you have a relative in the army, Dr. Kaioh?"

"No."

"A brother, a cousin, or maybe a husband, Kaioh is your married name or da-"

"There is no Kaioh in the army." Michiru interrupted him, trying not to alter her tone of voice. But the other noticed that thrill, and just tilted his head. "And anyway, we're not here to talk about me."Poined out the girl.

"But I think it's much more stimulating to talk about her, Dr. Kaioh." It was Tenou's answer, which leaned forward towards the doctor, looking for her gaze.

"It never happened to you, huh?"

"What?"

"Being the ant under the magnifying glass." Michiru felt put on the corner. She had lost some enamel, certainly, in the years of inactivity, and certainly had a completely wrong approach. To show herself to be friendly had somehow led her to leave her bare side: Tenou had noticed and, under an equally friendly mask, had struck mercilessly. She had to regain control of the situation.

"Nobody wants to burn her with a ray of sunshine, Major. If I'm here, it's just to help her."

"A help I did not ask."

"Your recent actions say exactly the opposite." She held the other's gaze for a long moment, and Michiru understood what lay ahead of her: a grinding wall against the wall.

"I know you are taking rather heavy medicines, I will ensure that the quantities are reduced." The young woman smiled before continuing.

"As you see, your not the only one to worry about your health."

"You misunderstood." The other answered, bothering to smile back. "I said that my health is the object of my interest, not that I am interested in healing."

x

Michiru came out of the bathroom, where she had taken off make-up and brushed her hair, and came back for the umpteenth time in the living room to grab the recorder. Then, exhausted by the day ended with the famous dinner at the home of the Chiba family whose invitation, so to speak, had triggered the whole, taken to the bedroom intent to let Morfeo welcome her in his comfortable arms. Not before putting on tape the impressions of that first day, which were many. Maybe too much. Tenou was without a doubt ... something. It was intriguing, in its way of doing. Indisponent, arrogant, certainly. But anyhow, he had a certain aura. " _Michiru Kaioh, 11.27 pm on April 19, 2008. The endless day._ " She began after lying on the bed. " _Today I met Major Tenou. Aesthetically speaking, if that guy wanted to leave the Army to give himself to fashion, he would have no problems whatsoever, angelic outside, as diabolical inside ..._ " she remained silent, recalling the events of the day . " _Point one: taken like this, as I have known it today, it would not seem a typical case of the Disorder. An admission of self-destructive behavior has emerged, that yes, and yet I have found it hard to believe that the person sitting in front of me was able to unleash himself in the extremely violent manner I know of: Point Two: Tenou is a player, and he makes indifference his strength, he is detached and does not bother to tell you what's on his mind. He is extremely skilled at understanding where he can hit, creating the most damage, and with me he has almost succeeded ... "_ She covered the tape recorder so as not to leave the yawning sound she could not hold on the tape. " _But, point four, he heard Foster's advances and he showed up, giving me advice .. He had no trouble telling me that in the hospital rumor that Mamoru and I go to bed together, but not even that he was informed about my account ... "_ The slow opening of the bedroom door turned Michiru away from her ruminations. She hastened to turn off the recorder and sit down on the bed, while the small figure appeared in the doorway, rubbing her sleepy eyes with one hand and holding the stuffed bunny in the other. "Mom..."

"What's up, angel?" Michiru asked, approaching the raven-haired little girl wearing a helmet and kneeling in front of her.

"It's very late, you know?" Two violet irises planted on the blue ones of Michiru. "Luna is afraid." Michiru watched the child lift the cuddly toy, and smiled.

"Then it will be better if you and Luna sleep here with me for tonight, what do you think?" The child's face lit up, and Michiru lifted her up, returning to the bed. She considered that it was not entirely unexpected: between her and the little Chibiusa, at Mamoru's house, they had taken out a whole ice-cream tub. A nightmare could also be there. They settled under the sheets, the little girl clutching her puppet, Michiru holding both.

"Goodnight Hotaru," the girl managed to murmur, kissing the girl's hair, before fatigue took over.

 **Author's notes: wow, I did it today too! I don't think I'll be able to update this fiction that fast as I'm doing right now, I have school and personal business. Anyway, I'll try to update sooner possible, thank you so much reader and remember to leave a small review to let me know about any doubt or anything else you'd like to understand. Until next time this is Milla23 ;)**


	4. Chapter 4

**That chapter may shock you a bit, but don't worry, remember that ' _with Tenou nothing is what it seems to be.'_**

 **ENJOY THE CHAPTER ;)**

 **The beast inside**

 _29 April,_

 _2008_

 _Day 10_

Sitting on the kitchen table, she held her tea hot cup in her hands.

From the saloon came the sounds made by the tv, and spinning around she saw Hotaru who, laying on her stomach was staring intensely at her favourite tv program.

The tap of the recorder had just started to turn.

" _Michiru Kaioh, 9:23pm 29th April 2008. Today, finally I understood. I saw that."_ Her voice trembled a bit, still shocked by the latest happenings. " _Today I saw the illness inside Tenoh. Today I saw the beast which_ _is capable of deleting all Haruka's psych in some seconds, changing him. I was what the war has made to this person. I thought they were overreacting, but this morning I saw the guy I thought to know disappear from my sight, to end up who knows where. Probably in Iraq, and in the devastation the battle caused not only in that country, but in the heads whom comes back from there on his own legs."_

She swallowed some hot tea. Her hands lightly shaking. " _Right now I know that this day had been a lie, my considerations can be thrown away in the toilet, but I wanted a complete image of him, and right now I have it. And it's worse than I've been guessing. If Tenou won't be constantly followed I'm afraid he could do something very stupid. And very dangerous..."_

Michiru's gaze went back on Hotaru and the remembering came back.

' _Miss Michiru, you have to come back home home right now!!! We can't come into the house, and no one answers. We just hear the baby crying.'_

With a hand she shut her eyes, while bringing the other one to her neck, where the first marks were starting to come. The marks of Tenou's hands.

x

 _Medical Hospital " Edward Dewenish VA Medical Centre"_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _28 April,_ _2008_

 _Day 9_

It had been raining the whole night, and it seemed as if the meteorological station wasn't going to make the rain stop falling down on Portsmouth.

It was just 9:15 am, but Michiru had equally to keep her lights on because of the weather. And of course that didn't help her mood, it was as dark as the weather outside.

With Tenou she wasn't not in a dead track, but in a buried one. They have been doing 9 days of daily meetings, where Michiru studied the Major like he did with her, they didn't go further than the date of birth - even though she already knew that - a pair of stories about his last companions back in Iraq, and some information else, which, weren't useful for the psychologist. Not even the day when, urging him, Michiru had discovered that Tenou had made the military academy none other than at West Point, but she had just managed to get a spider from the hole: when she asked him about that experience, he had instead preferred to ask where she had studied psychology and the reason for that choice. She agrees to work on empathy, but in doing so, Michiru feared that sooner or later, in treatment, she would end up there.

Among them it was like the game of the cat with the mouse, but the girl had not yet well understood which of the two roles she covered. She heard a knock on the door and left her notes for a moment, inviting anyone to enter. She swore that if it was Foster, she would have pulled him something: today was not just a day. Fortunately - more than Samuel that hers - it was Mamoru.

"May I ask you something?" Said him sitting down.

"Did you come to propose me a change?" Joked Michiru, the other one just struggled. " unless you're interested in a crazy man who thinks that below Kabul there is an alien city, no. I'd like to talk to you about Tenou."

"Do not tell me."

Mamoru leaned back, crossing his legs. "I know that he isn't taking no more his medicines."

"I asked for a gradual reduction. To understand the real problem, I need him to be perfectly awake."

"You know what's the matter. Leaving him without them is a risk."

"I left him the Lorazepam, to sleep."

"Well, it doesn't work. It has been two nights I found him laying on the chair at the entrance staring at the ceiling, and the night before chatting to the nurse. Even if" Mamoru said laying forward the desk "judging by the foulard wore by the nurse has been warring the whole day to hide her neck, I don't think they just chatted."

Michiru just stood there wide opened. Then she laughed, shaking her head.

"The charme Tenou has struck again! Don't know why, but I was expecting that." Mamoru smiled at her, then become serious again.

"I meant that now he's cleaned. Do your tests, try to find out the problem, as you call it, then make Tenou under control again."

"I thought my score was to free him from the medicines."

"Not to the detriment of your safety."

"Let's see..." Michiru provocked him putting a hand under her chin and pretending to think. "If you are so worried why does the Major can walk freely around the building? Do you have a mask to put on him and make him play the Phantom of the Opera in a hospital sauce?"

"His behavior here, so far, was irreproachable, so it's not like we could tie Tenou to bed, and you're not funny anyway."Michiru closed the clipboard and stood up from the desk, imitated by Mamoru."Speaking of Opera, do not you have a concert this week?"

"Tomorrow, I can only try the evening, so I do not know how it will end, if you want I have tickets for you and Usagi, and as always Jenny can keep Chibiusa with Hotaru."Mamoru scratched his head. "Chibiusa has a bit of a fever, and I do not know if Usako wants to leave her with the babysitter, risking, among other things, to attack something in Hotaru."

"Do not worry, it's better than you think of Chibiusa," the girl commented.

"Now I'm going, or my Prince Charming will feel abandoned."

"Have a nice day," Mamoru wished. "And be careful."

Michiru rolled her eyes and started walking towards the well known room 4. She found him immersed in the dim light, but thanks to the large, rain-stained window, she could glimpse a figure seated on the small armchair. She tapped one of the switches near the door, but the light did not turn on. She realized she was wrong, for the umpteenth time, key.

"Crap..." muttered and she heard Tenou laughing.

She pushed the right one and the room was suddenly lightened by the neons, getting on and off in a fast way.

She saw the guy shutting his eyes putting his palm on his face and Michiru felt good about that small revenge.

"Why doc, you could have damaged my retine by doing that, you know?"

Asked the Major while standing up showing up his guardian on his left arm. She couldn't ask nothing at all, because right in that moment two nurses came into the room.

"Doctor Kaioh, did you call?" Asked one of them, who was between 40 and 50 years old, kinda. Michiru looked at her ashamed.

"I wrong, I'm sorry. I always forget the first key is for emergencies."

"It's ok, but it had already been two times this week, then if you really need it..." he didn't end the period, just looked at Tenou. When they were gone, Michiru was greeted, as always, by the attention of the Major Tenou.

"What happened to your arm?" She asked becoming curious about the guardian on his arm; Tenou waited for her to sit down, then she spoke up "it hurt me so they told me to make it rest." She kept quiet for a while.

"It always hurts when it rains or it's humid." Michiru then said "oh, it's the shoulder, right?"

Tenou tilted her head, the young woman could see the pain through her features and two beep eye bags. "The left shoulder, the one they operated you for, uhm, let's see..." she read through her papers "...fracture of the anterior edge of the glenoid, a complication of a dislocation."

The other one just nodded.

"How did you break it?"

Tenoh didn't answer her. He didn't want to give up and Michiru did understand that from the eyed the other one sent her. But he was clearly tired because of the lacks of sleep, and she would have taken it for exhaustion. 'Whoever lasts it wins it' they say.

Then a sight left his lips and she started to feel the taste of the victory.

"On my birthday a Battalion of the Armed Militia Sunnite has thought well to celebrate filling up a van with a TN and blowing up my team and me, " began to tell Tenou." I do not remember much of the incident, only when I wake up ... "

 _Frosty water. A violent burst, straight on the face._ Tenou stopped, and Michiru waited. Finally they were putting a pair of bricks on top of each other. "... when they woke me they were on the ground, and my shoulder hurt."

"Who was holding it?"

"Do not pretend not to know ... You will read my file ... how many? A dozen times?"

"There is no written what happened during the two weeks that he was a Sunni prisoner."

"Well, they certainly did not make me a tab and then put a nice plaster in. I had a practically dead arm and those motherfuckers left me writhing in pain all the time."

Right now Tenou was up and his face an angered mask. "We were there to help people. To offer them our help. We went there to _help them_."

"Have you ever thought that maybe to help them was just necessary to let them doing their own business?"

Tenou leaned back with the healthy hand to the back of the chair. Green eyes reduced to a crack, facing the girl.

"Do not make me morals about what is right or not right, I have walked on pieces of corpses, doctor, you did not see what I saw down there, and that God, if he exists, spare you."Michiru watched the other bring his healthy hand to his face, covering his eyes.

"My head hurts, Doc. Can we postpone the session tomorrow?"The girl smiled, more than satisfied with the day and the reappearance of the nickname with which Tenou had started calling her. "Sure, go ahead, I'll call you somebody?"But he did not answer and, without looking back, left the room.

x

 _Day 10_

It still rains.

The shoulder hurts, as well as the temples. The night before had been yet another without sleep.

The grayness of the sky did not help. For nothing. Just as it did not help the ticking of the wall clock, amplified by the silence of the room in which the arrival of Dr. Kaioh awaited.

 _Tic. Tac. Tic. Tac ..._

That morning she felt at the limit. She looked at the chasm, struggling not to fall into it. The day before, for the first time since what happened in the Virginia Beach bar, her mind had returned to Iraq. She had come back in there, in that hole dug in the rock, in the nothing near to Tikrit.

 _Tic. Tac._

She looked at the clock hanging on the wall, a rather sought-after piece to be the decor of a shrink's interview room. She wondered if it had not been a touch of Kaioh. Her doctor seemed a person with a certain taste and refinement. And those aquamarine hair, which framed the sweet features, gave her an almost unreal aura. The first time she had seen her, she had thought it had emerged from the bay. That a wave of light foam had placed it directly on the beach. She still could not explain why.

 _Tic. Tac_ ,

The pain in her head became more acute, and a grip gripped her stomach. The Botticellian image left her mind, which returned to the darkness of Iraqi nights. There was a clock there too. Of those small, table, plastic. She was leaning against a wall niche, near a grating that looked out over the sky. She could see it from a crack in the wooden planks that closed its niche, as she called the place where she had spent the worst two weeks of her entire existence. At night, between the excruciating pains on her shoulder and her moaning, in the next cell, the ticking of the cheap hands had become the hammer that, unabated, fell on her now very fragile nervous system.

 _Tic. Tac._

She closed her eyes, her head on the brink of exploding. She felt the suction of the abyss: she considered that letting go would have cost less effort than to resist. And she let herself fall. Room 4 was gone, in its place the _loculus_. She no longer wore jeans and the Army Army sweatshirt but the uniform was worn out. It was one of the many nights when, back to the wall, she waited with wide-eyed eyes for the arrival of a new day, peering from time to time in the gap between the boards. The wrists tied against each other by chains encrusted with blood.

 _Tic. Tac._

She could not sleep, or they would take advantage of it. And then she had to think. Keep your mind always in motion, not to succumb. How would she make them pay for those beasts for what they were doing? Unexpectedly, the door swung open and a figure appeared on the door. She was supposed to be one of her jailers, who came as usual to lead the American into the other cell, where she would have to witness again their inhuman actions. No, this time she would have her revenge. They had sent only one, and despite everything could have the best.

She hurled herself towards the same figure who was now closing the door, slamming it against the wall. She brought her right hand to its neck, while her left arm, limited in movement by both pain and being tied to the other by the wrist, was pushing violently against its chest. She estimated that perhaps, striking again and more vehemently, she could break the breastbone to the unfortunate figure who, meanwhile, was trying to wriggle out, no doubt taken aback. She saw it gasp, while the hand did not let the grip on the neck and tightened, taking away its breath. She felt herself being hit on one knee but the adrenaline, added to the blind fury of having one finally in her hands, was too much. It canceled the pain of the blows of that indistinct shape, gradually, however, increasingly weak. She wiped the pangs on her shoulder and head. "Tenou!" it was the strangled scream of that, and after a moment she registered a burning sensation on his left cheek. "Haruka ..." she continued, her voice weakening. An aquamarine reflection filled her eyes, then she found herself on the ground. The impact was violent, and a pressure on the back prevented any movement. She screamed in frustration, first; from pain, then. She blinked, trying to focus on those excited moments. But when she realized what was going on around her, she would have preferred not to have done it. The cell was gone, or rather there had never been. She did not have uniform or even wrists tied. She was on her side; above she had two nurses, one with a syringe in her hand, the other standing on her wrists. And facing her - a hand on her neck as she coughed violently trying to catch her breath, the other still pressing the emergency call button - was Dr. Kaioh. Foster appeared next to her, who helped her to sit down and talk to her, trying to get her back, then Chiba. She felt the needle penetrate her shoulder, a single thought consistent with turning into the overloaded system that was now her head. What have I done? She saw the girl's blue eyes looking for her own, and at the moment when the two looks crossed they read the dismay, shock, bewilderment. In the face of Kaioh overlapped, for a brief moment, another, with completely different features but with a gaze full of those same sensations. She felt her conscience slip away into the celestial irises of the doctor. And when she closed her eyes, she hoped she would not wake up anymore.

 **Author's notes: yes! I did it! I updated that fast because almost surely tomorrow I won't have anytime to do it, so, I'll wish you a good day by this chapter. Quite a rough one, maybe a bit confused... here we are starting to understand a bit more about the Major, even if it's still confused. About Michiru, I can tell you that in the next chapter there will be a part dedicated to her past, but you'll have to be patient XD. If you have any doubt, let me know it in your review or write me a PM. Until next time this is Milla23 ;)**

 **P.S. of course let me know about any spelling mistakes, it's possible, because right now here it's 3:30 am XD and I'm very sleepy!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Enjoy it! :)**

 **Cards discovered**

 _Tikrit,_

 _Iraq_

 _2007_

They got off quickly from the vehicle, following a precise order. The first wave of Kalashnikov didn't late to reach them. "And they shoot, too! " Shouted one, crouched behind an outer wall that sheltered him.Two soldiers, on the other side of the same wall, laughed.

" What did you expect, Clarkson? What would the red carpet spread out? We're not at the Oscars. "

Haruka just lifted her knees, putting the house in an optimal view. Another fagot broke the wall, and ran back to shelter.

"Ok, today it's easy." She said with a smile. "Clarkson, Holman and Sanford will skirt the perimeter and come in from the back, Bowen and Ramsey will cover their movement, while Parker and Evans will cover ours." Haruka accompanied the words with dry, precise gestures. And every soldier nodded, the moment they heard their name being called.

"Banks and I will enter from the front." Armed the M4s, and Haruka opened her left hand, her right hand firmly to her weapon. With her fingers she started a countdown.

"Let's beat the bastards." Shee said when the index indicated the last second. Then she closed her fist. "Go Go go!!" The swarm of soldiers came out of their shelter, starting to run against the low gray brick house in front of them. No more than one, but several Kalashnikovs poured their shots on the soldiers with the American flag sewn on their shoulders. As per instructions, three began to turn around the house, while those in charge of covering the movements of the companions fired against the windows and the strategic points of the house. Haruka ran to the front door, which suddenly opened wide: a man with a short beard, black as hair, appeared in the doorway, a machine gun aimed at them. "Banks!" Haruka screamed, speeding up the pace. And before the Arab could shoot, a series of blows arrived to riddle his legs. Haruka lowered her head and charged him violently to her stomach: if she found him, unbalanced by both the bump and by the fact of having the legs unserviceable, along on his back, and with a bending of the legs she freed herself by overturning him. Then she turned and raised her thumb to Banks, still long on the ground, M4 clenched in his fist. Haruka began to scour the house with cautious steps, the machine gun in line with the eye, the index steady on the trigger; she saw two of her men enter from the back, and disperse in the house. She stepped over a corpse, without stopping to look to the right and left. She entered a room whose floor was covered with rugs, and snapped to a movement to her left: a man stepped out of Kalashnikov to her hand, but Haruka mowed it in an instant. She approached him, kicking the weapon away, while she writhed and held his stomach. The lamentations accompanied Haruka's entrance into a new room, where she found the bodies of two women on the ground; she backed up, then, retracing her steps, and then turned to cover the previous area with her gaze again. She came out of a French window, checking the outside: if all went well, that part must have been cleaned up by Sanford, Holman, and Clarkson.

"Major, is everything ok?" Banks cried, who appeared in the room that Haruka had left behind. "Sure, we fucked them, Richard?" She asked the boy, and when she saw him get to rest and take off his camouflage helmet, revealing a black mop with some tufts stuck to his forehead by the sweat, he sensed the answer.

"Sanford put two of them on the back, Bowen and Evans one each, at home, and the other at the entrance, and this one, the six of us who had reported us."

Haruka relaxed, removing the helmet in turn. "And they did not fuck us, did they?" She then asked, and received a broad smile in response.

"Not even a scratch, Major." Haruka nodded.

"There are some wounded, it will be better to have the Red Cross come in. Did you find anything?" Banks was the only one of her team who could speak Arabic, and Haruka always made sure that she had the nineteen-year-old with whom she had left school to enlist. It was her shadow, and also the only one who knew. He looked at her scratching his head before answering.

"The guy who laid out with the headboard was still quite confused, however, as far as I understand, they are Sunni militiamen, and the house was owned by a small merchant, also Sunni, they got him and his family to take refuge in of the Shiites. " They went to the entrance, where they saw the arrival of the Iraqi police and a couple of Red Cross vans, probably already moved by the central command.

"First they killed the merchant's family, then they started killing the Shia one, I think we came after the fires, unfortunately." Haruka leaned over the corpse she had climbed over at the beginning, and from her dress - simple clothes, no cartridge belt, no weapon - she imagined the Shiite head of the family. By now, after almost six years in Iraq, she knew how to recognize them on the fly.

"Has anyone been saved?"

"I do not know, others are looking for."

"And yet they have not found it?" Hushed Haruka. "It does not seem exactly like a palace, this one." She began to walk around the house, entering each room. She met Bowen and Ramsey, intent on keeping two militiamen captured alive under control. Then, coming from a wall not far away, she heard the voices of her men. "Look how cute it is!"

"She's scared, baby!" Laughs.

"Come on darling, do not be afraid, we are the good ..."

"What the fuck is going on here?" Haruka asked, at the sight of the scene. Clarkson and Holman stood in the middle of what at first glance looked like a room, and looked amused Parker, bent by a girl curled up in the corner of the room, between the wall and a wooden chest missing a piece.

"I asked what's going on here." It was Clarkson who spoke.

"We found it hidden inside the cabinet," he explained, pointing to the chest.

"We were trying to reassure her." Tenou's green eyes narrowed to that statement. "Yes I've heard." "Major, we did not want to do anything wrong ..." Parker started, who got up, but Haruka silenced him. "Everybody out." Those obeyed, and left Haruka in the room, with the trembling girl who now looked at the terrified soldier. She did not tolerate certain behavior on the part of her men, and later she would give them a good grooming. How could she, on the other hand? If only they had known ... she knelt on the ground, taking off the M4. She unbuttoned her bulletproof vest and, raising her hands to show the girl she had no weapons, began to crawl towards her. That made herself small, clutching her knees to her chest and crushing herself against the wall.

"Do not be afraid," Haruka murmured.

"I do not want to hurt you." She smiled at her, but she did not move. She came near her, and sat down. "What's your name?" The girl's eyes were lost, empty of shock. In a few moments she must have lost everything: her family, her dearest affections. Haruka hoped they'd left her dignity at least.

"Do you understand my language?" She pressed her, but nothing. She put her hands on her hips, then she had an idea: she pointed to the name sewn on the uniform.

"Haruka Tenou, it's me." She said, accompanying the words with one hand on her chest. The other looked at those same letters, confused, and Haruka thought that there were probably incomprehensible signs. She touched her chest again.

"Ha-ru-ka." Said. Then she pointed them at the index, questioning. Finally the girl spoke, but too quiet to be understood. Haruka narrowed her eyes and leaned forward, barely turning her head to the left, touching her ear.

"Samira," the other murmured. Haruka smiled. "Do not be afraid, Samira." She reached out a hand, but she withdrew, frightened by the sudden movement. The girl was completely shocked, and Haruka felt very sorry. She was very young, she must have been a little over eighteen, but she could not say for sure. She had lost the veil, and her long black hair fell softly on her shoulders, while her eyes were the same color fixed on the military, wide open. The long dress she wore was filthy and blood-stained, tearing at several points. Haruka could not explain why, but felt a duty to reassure her that everything would be fine. That nobody would hurt her, left alone in her presence. She evaluated the pros and cons, and decided to take the risk. She smiled again, shaking her head. Then she reached out again, and Samira let herself take her own.

"I am like you, I can not hurt you."She put the girl's hand to her chest: she felt that the bands had loosened, so it would not take long to understand. Samira did not move, confused by the gesture. Then, slowly, Haruka saw the realization hit the face of the young woman, who began to touch her repeatedly. Tenou laughed at the other's wide eyes. And when Samira looked for her, she winked at her, bringing her forefinger to her lips.

xdxdxdxdx 

_Medical Hospital " Edward Dewenish VA Medical Centre"_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _30 April, 2008_

 _Day 11_

The dry sound of the heels resounded in the corridor while she walked straight towards the in-patient room. She was holding tight her paper sheets in her hand, and she thought, thought and thought again. Her mind and uncontrolled reel.

She was thinking about what happened the day before; and about the mistakes she made, and that she won't repeat. That night, for the first time since she accepted the case, everything was bright: same diagnosis, same outbursts of rage. She exactly knew where this would have brought Tenou, because _she already went trough that._ But if three years before she had been that blind, and stupid, to believe everything was alright, right now she won't give up that easily. She thanked any existing god to make her accept the case, while she would have preferred to bury everything on a remote side of her mind, because that was clear: Tenou was her _karma,_ and she couldn't give up that.

She turned another tight corridor, and she started to search for the room 2. Ahead it, she took a deep breath and entered without knocking. Tenou laid on the bed, on her left check still visible the scratches of her nails. The blanket covered him until his chest; he was wearing the hospital shirt. His arms were bare, and padded straps on his wrists- that disappeared in an unspecified spot under the bed - blocking him down, not allowing him to stand up.

Sleep without dreams because of the cocktail of drugs that had become necessary after his behave of the previous day.

Without any regard, Michiru dragged a chair up to the bed, then deliberately dropped the folder she had carried on a hard plastic lunchbox anchored to the footboard, which produced a dull thud. She saw Tenou jerk, opening his eyes wide. She waited for it to come out of the blanket of confusion that clouded his eyes as he watched the straps that bound him. She watched him tug, and realize the failure of that action.

Michiru cleared her throat, and seemed as if he just saw her. The emerald eyes of the young man seemed to be crossed by a flash of amazement, then they crossed the blue ones of the Kaioh. They staid silent for a long time, until his gaze noticed the foulard on the neck of the young woman, before slipping away into the wall in front of her, it was the first time Tenou didn't look at her straight into the eyes.

The girl lifted a picture and put it in front of the Major, showing him it.

"Michael Pappadakis 32 years old, roofer, child of Greek emirates. Recovered on the 10th of April at the St. James Hospital in Norfolk with bruising all over the body, fracture of the tibia, of the nasal septum and of the orbital bone, as well as a tearing of the diaphragm and breakthrough of the right eardrum. "

Michiru tossed the picture to Tenou, who leaned back against the sheet. She watched him swallow, but he still did not turn around. She took another picture; she gave her a quick glance, before starting.

"Johnatan Brown, thirty-one, a resident of Norfolk, a colleague of Papadakis, hospitalized, always on April 10th and always at St. James Hospital, also with various bruises, in addition to a lung punctured by a rib and a broken jaw and to the skull. " She also took that picture, the tumefied and deformed faces now leaning on the white sheets. Tenou did not make a turn.

"Michiru Kaioh, twenty-seven years old, psychologist at the Military Hospital Edward Dewenish VA Medical Center." At those words, the boy seemed to be recovering, and watched the doctor bring her fingers to the scarf and undo the knot, discovering the white neck now covered with black-purple streaks.

"Ecchymosis on the neck following a strangling attempt." Michiru paused. "Do you know what it's called, all this?"Tenou just stayed silent. "It's called Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder" explained the girl, " we call it PTSD, but in your specific case we call it Post-Traumatic Stress From Battle, which brought you to become very violent and dangerous. To the limits of sociopathy, _Haruka."_

He stayed wide eyed for being called by his name. "Do not make that face. Keeping the you with you I thought it was ridiculous after what happened." She leaned back on the chair never stopping looking at him.

"What happened was my fault, too. I pushed you over the edge, and I accept to consequences. Even because I know that this person _isn't you."_ She took back the pictures while continuing speaking "I know it for sure. I know the real Haruka Tenou wouldn't go to kill himself in the Virginia Beach's bars, drinking until forgetting I don't know what and punching some poor guy just because they were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Or strangling medics." Michiru smiled, and that collected Tenou's dismay.

"That is a devious disease, Haruka. It will bring you to distort the real world, to see things which doesn't exist. To believe there won't be any help for you, then to search for they easier way to put and end to your sufferings. I guess you already thought about that, did you?"

Tenou stayed quiet. She thought about the moment she opened her eyes in her bedroom that night. The nurse who had immediately injected something else into the vein and her burning desire that, whatever it was, could cause a heart attack, a stroke. Or what it was, as long as it did not wake up. She nodded, then, to the doctor.

"You have two possibilities, now, you can sit here in silence, drown in your despair, or let me free you from what led you to be what you are now, but to do it, you have to accept the help you have stubbornly rejected until today. "

Tenou felt Michiru's hand covering her bedside. She looked at her, so delicate and candid, so contrasting with her own, bigger, darker. Without a doubt, dirtier. "Believe it or not, I want to help you, Haruka, I will not be watching as you push the self-destruct button, waiting for the countdown to go to zero." Silence fell into the room, and Michiru saw the uncertainty running through Tenou's eyes. She saw the arrogant boy, sure of himself at the limit of indecency, wavering at her words.

"Think about it," She said then, heading for the door, when she looked back at the ceiling, excluding her from her own thoughts.

x

 _Military Hospital "Edward Dewenish VA Medical Centre"_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _4 May, 2008_

 _Day 15_

In the outside it was a sunny day.

The temperature warmed up of several degrees, and Michiru felt very positive while walking towards the room 2 of the in-patient pushing the wheelchair.

"Stand up, Soldier!" She shouted at the figure who laid on a side. Tenou gave her her back and as an answer she only got a grunt.

'Good' she thought. The day wasn't starting otherwise the other ones. Michiru thought about the possibility of writing a dictionary about Tenou's grunts. Short and dry: I ignore you. Longer and guttural: leave me alone. Plus a lot of shades obviously.

"Come on, _caveman._ Today it's sunny and you've already been too much here."

Haruka didn't move.

"Do not make me taking you in arm, Major." She told him. The other one seemed to be awake, and sitting on the bed after snorting. Michiru got out, waiting for Haruka to get dressed, and after a bit, he came out on his wheelchair. She put her bag on his legs without any problem, receiving a theatrical 'oufff'- then she went behind him pushing the wheelchair toward the corridor. The chair was not really necessary, but Haruka was taking heavy drugs and they had also found bruises in the pelvis at the lumbar area, the result of the violent impact with the floor when the two nurses had taken it off, causing it to fall to the ground under the their weight.

Since the day in which they have talked there hasn't been any change. Michiru kept going at the hospital for having the usually meetings, thought they were reduced by her asking some questions and Haruka didn't answer.

Meanwhile she had managed to get him untied: between a grunt and another Tenou begged her forgiveness, and Michiru read deep repentance in the military's eyes.

Right before entering in the lift the nurse called her, catching her attention.

"It's all under control." Reassured her Michiru.

"We are leaving for a park tour."

"Are you sure? I don't know if Doctor Chiba..."

"There's no danger beside doctor Chiba knows it. The only danger is that _the vampire_ here get pulverised by the sunlight."

The nurse laughed, and at her ears came also the ironic _Ah-ah_ by Tenou.

"If you say so. I was just going to the Major to give him those," said then the girl, showing Michiru a small plastic cylinder with two white and blue capsules, "he has to take them in the morning."

"No problem, I'll think of it." The doctor took from the nurse's hand the cylinder and put it in her shirt's sack. Once inside the elevator, she pushed the downstairs button to the back of the hospital, where the small private park of the complex extended. There were several patients out that day. A boy was holding an arm around the shoulders of a young woman, and both looked at the attempts of a little girl with long blonde braids to line up more than a few steps. Another boy gestured in his story to a middle-aged couple. It must have been a day of visits, and a thought struck her: no one had ever come to see Haruka.

They reached a bench. Michiru took the bag from the womb of Tenou and set it down on the ground; so she sat down, not before placing the wheelchair in front of her. She watched Tenou stretch, and then look back at her.

"That's a beautiful day, isn't that?"she asked him suddenly taking aback him. "And you wanted to stay in your _cave_. Even bears come out to have a tour sometimes, you know?"

Haruka rested her cheek on the back of her hand and, turning her back to her, began to look at an undefined spot in the park.

"So, let's see, about what should we _not_ talk about?" Said Michiru and receiving no answer she said "ok then. I'll take this opportunity to repeat." Haruka heard the sound of some paper sheets then anything else, except her doctor's whistle. Then the curiosity got the best of her, and she turned towards the girl: she was absorbed into reading a sheet and

a pencil which was occasionally brought to her lips in a gesture - Tenou couldn't help but think that - _very sexy_. Other sheets were on the bench and she reached for one of them and then asked:

"What instrument do you play?"

Tenou's words came unexpectedly. It was the first meaningful phrase that he addressed in days.

"Oh, you can talk then. Tell the truth I wanted to call you Saint Bernard.

Haruka looked briefly at her, then went back on the sheet.

"I play the violin."

"And do you have any concert?" Tenou seemed sincerely interested.

"Sometimes. I just gave one last week, right after our, let's say, _close encounter."_

The boy stopped looking at the paper and leaned towards her. He slowly reached out a hand and Michiru froze at the gesture; the memories of that same hand tight around her neck still well etched in her head. A finger of the young man brushed the small, slightly darker patches that still stained the white skin of the doctor, not completely gone.

"My mother played..." muttered Haruka. The girl got relaxed. A strange feeling by that gesture, so _intimate_ , from the Major. And when he looked at her he asked "Are you real?"

"Excuse-me?"

"Look at you. You keep coming here everyday, asking me how I am and how I'm not, after I almost _killed you._ And probably ruining your concert too. But why don't you leave me alone?"

"I already told you why I won't leave you alone. And you didn't ruin my concert."

Tenou put the sheets on the bench and said " I'm the worst thing could've happened to you, doc."

"I'm not sure."

Haruka shook her head. "You don't understand..."

"That's true, I don't understand. That's why I want you to let me know why."

They looked at each other for a while and Michiru brought her hand on Tenou's chin making her see his left check where three light strips were on the skin.

"That hurt you, truth?"

Tenou looked at her as if she had three eyes "God, then you do it!"

Michiru smiled " what?"

"I strangle you, and you are worried about you screeches?!"

"Well, I would not call them scratches! I blew your cheek!"

Haruka looked at her. A smile curved the corners of her lips, and Michiru felt her heart fill. She knew it would be a good day.

"You do not have all the wheels in place, doc, do you know that?" Tenou asked her, without stopping to look at her. The other frowned for a moment, then nodded.' _You do not have all the wheels in place, Michi, do you know?_ '"Yes, someone told me often."

Haruka noticed her mood change, but she didn't asked anything else.

Michiru looked at the hospital doors, lost in thought, and didn't noticed the figure watching them from a distance. Tenou also followed the doctor's gaze.

"Oh my, _Great Brother_ is looking at us." Said him, watching Foster far away. Michiru sighed. "You know, I guess I won't be able to runaway forever, I should talk to him."

"I think Foster feels threatened,doc." Said Tenou, "even though he can sleep peacefully. I don't think I'm your type." Michiru turned around at that statement. "What do you mean by _you're not my type?"_

Trust me, I know. People like you end up with type like... uhm... Foster."

"You are not helping at all."

"Well I usually am a _phase_. But I repeat, it's not you case."

Michiru was too curious now. "That's good. What do you know about me? What do you know that my ideal man is not really a problematic soldier, blond and green-eyed?" Challenged back Michiru and he laughs.

"Well, because the concept of _ideal man_ already excludes me."

The girl didn't understand. "Do you know what are the capsules the nurse gave you?"

Michiru searches for the capsules in her shirt.

"It's iron." Said Haruka.

"Oh, are you anemic?" Asked Michiru, worried.

"Not at all. I have shortcomings on a regular basis. Let's say monthly too." Tenou leaned forward towards her. "When I have my _period."_

After a long moment, necessary to record the information, Michiru's face passed a wide range of emotions in rapid succession: confusion, bewilderment, surprise, disbelief.Tenou pulled away, and Michiru reached out to grab the zip of Haruka's sweatshirt: she slid it down, revealing a white t-shirt. And what was, unmistakably, the shape of a breast.

 _A woman!_

She hypnotised all the day spent together, in small details that now, with benefit of a hand sight, pleaded the cause: the long eyelashes, the curve of the neck. Her being so beautiful, in the females features that she has noticed in that first meeting.

She wondered if she had sinned in any way of lightness. Of pride, the countless times she had read Tenou's file. So without even a word he got up from the bench and headed for the hospital, leaving behind the person who had managed to get her through twice in less than a week.

xdxdxdxdx 

"The strange case of the doctor Jekyll and mister Hyde." Haruka jumped when, coming back in her room with a nurse, she found Michiru on her bed, looking at one of the books taken from the library.

"Appropriated, I'd say."

"It's what the convent passes." It was the laconic response of the girl in a wheelchair. Then silence filled the space between the two.

"Listen, doc-"

"How many do they know?" interrupted Michiru. Haruka scratched her head, then leaned closer to the bed.

"Chiba knew it, now you know it too."

"Medical records, documents, reports, I know those sheets by heart and not once, one, it is said that Haruka Tenou is a woman, and this morning, when I was in doubt, all of them were read to me."

"I know."

"Do you also know it's a crime?" A bitter smile was painted on Haruka's face.

"My father is the Chief of Staff of the Army, he is the one who asks to falsify the files." Michiru did not answer. "Because?" Haruka turned her head back, bringing her hands behind her head.

"Because for Takeshi Tenou, a multi-talented hero of Vietnam, it was simply shameful not to be able to procreate a son, so he decided that he would erase his failure by erasing my being a woman."

"And did you let him do it?" Then another thought struck Michiru.

"And your mother?" Haruka did not like all these questions too much, but concluded that at least this, to Michiru, could grant it.

"My mother thought she'd get cancer when I was eleven, and die when I was thirteen." At fifteen Haruka Tenou, General Takeshi Tenou's only son, entered West Point, ready for a blazing career. " The girl had a million questions in mind, but Haruka's voice interrupted that river in flood.

"Look, I did not really want to shock you more than I had already done."

"Shocked?" The girl was incredulous. "I'm not shocked, Haruka, I'm disappointed, disappointed by the fact that I have not been held to know that my patient is actually a woman!"

"I do not think anyone ever thought of it, doc. It's just a little bit delicate."

"Yeah, so delicate that you wasted no time in disgracing yourself with the nurse of acceptance." Haruka looked at her, then laughed.

"We assume that I know how to conduct a quickie, Michiru, since I'm not an adolescent in a hormonal crisis." That said, I just gave her a couple of dummies, nothing so sinful. " The other remained silent, and Haruka sighed. "This leads to the other question, I suppose ..."

"Your sexuality does not bother me, seriously."

"Do not lie to me." She said to her, in a dangerously low voice, leaning towards Michiru. "I would understand it."

"You do not make me uncomfortable, it's the truth." Haruka did not speak. Then she approached her again.

"What if I told you you're cute?" She saw Michiru's cheeks turn slightly red, and she could not help but laugh.

"Be afraid!" She instructed the other, getting up from the bed and pointing her forefinger threateningly.

"You do not know who you're dealing with, Tenou!" "All right, all right." She answered that, raising her hands in surrender.

"I just wanted to do a little test, and then I told you, those like you end up like Foster." Michiru rolled her eyes, and after a glance at the clock, she took the door.

"See you tomorrow," she said goodbye. "We will have a lot to discuss from now on."

"Yeah, I think so." It was the other's response, scratching the blonde mop. Once left alone, she let out a deep sigh, and shook her head. That night, Haruka Tenou dreamed of running. An interminable race, merging with the wind, while the sand caressed her bare feet, but could not say if it did to run away or to reach something. Also because it was, _that something_ , she ignored it completely.

 **Author's notes: wow! That was hard! 5k! From now on, chapters will be longer, so it could happen that someday I will not be able to update. Anyway, here there is something more about Haruka's past, and a bit about Michiru's too. We'll understand better in later chapters, until next time this is Milla23 ;)**

 **P.S. if you have any doubt don't hesitate asking! And tell me if there is any spelling mistake!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Enjoy it. ;)**

 **Music in the heart**

 **Operation "Iraqi Freedom"**

 **4th Infantry division headquarter**

 **Tikrit,**

 **Iraq,**

 **2007**

"Listen, get along." Thundered Haruka into the satellite phone as she stood up from her desk. "Doctors Without Borders want a hand to transport from Samarra to Baghdad airport, but Unesco does not want military in the city because of the archaeological excavations, so where the fuck should I let my men go?"

"I will try to fix the blockade in Samarra, Major." The military replied to the other end of the cornet, in Baghdad.

"I did not know about the Unesco thing."

"Well, now you know, but I would like a little more organization, I can not change itineraries because the NGOs are annoyed, this is not a trip." Haruka approached the window, glancing outside while her interlocutor tried to give logical explanations to what appeared to be a Major Tenou more choleric than usual. The girl glanced at the rows of tensile structures surrounding the old factory that now served as headquarters, and the loading-unloading in the vehicles in preparation for the following day. Parked between two curtains a CNN van was seen, for the usual reports on the life of soldiers in Iraq. But running her gaze up to the entrance of the headquarters of the 4th Infantry Division, of which she held the command - second only to Colonel Coleman, she noticed the shape near the access point, almost ignored by the two solemn soldiers who they were stationed on guard. Haruka frowned. "... unless they pass by-"

"Now I'll tell you what you have to do." She interrupted the military's chatter.

"Tomorrow the sixty seventy men from my team will leave for Samarra, and it will be better if they do not encounter problems, otherwise I will come in person to Baghdad to strip you in the ass."

"Major, wai-" Haruka closed the communication and threw the phone on the desk.

"'Fuck everyone." She murmured, while she was back to her window with her arms outstretched. The figure was still there, and she watched curiously the coming and going of means. She heard a knock on the door, and soon a soldier entered the office. "What's up?" Churches, still irritated by the telephone conversation. And she also had menstruation, extenuating which she could not use in that context. Nor should it be communicated to third parties.

"Major there is a problem at the entrance." Said him.

"Mm, I see."

"They told her more than once to go away, but I don't think she understands. She even sat down."

Haruka scratched her head, rolling her eyes. She knew she wasn't an enemy, yet she couldn't stay there.

"Ok, I'll take that. You may go." Said then and the soldier went away.

She walked herself toward the exit of the building where her office was located, and once under the Iraqi sun she wore the Ray Ban she kept in her field uniform pocket. With a quick step she reached one of the neighboring tents, greeted by the attention of her men, and entered it: inside there were two rows with twelve beds each, in tubular steel, arranged on the right and on the left. At the back, lying on one of those field beds, a boy was absorbed in reading a book.

"Banks!"

At Haruka's shout, he jumped. "Come on Banks, I need you!"

"God, Major! You made me come an heart attack!" Said her Richard walking towards her.

"Move on Banks, I need a man to speak Arabian, not a _careful little woman_."

"That was the advanced Grammar, _Major."_

He replied defensively as they headed toward the entrance to the camp.

"And then, with all due respect, she can not really tell me that woman."Haruka ignored that comment, and passed the two guards. When they turned the corner, they saw the girl sitting on the low wall that surrounded the perimeter of the ex-factory, her hands tied around her knees.

"Samira." Called Haruka and the young woman turned smiling and jerked up, cleaning the long black dress she wore.

"Ehi but this is.."started Banks as Haruka nodded.

"Yeah, tell her she can't stay here."

The boy bowed his head, lowering his eyes, to greet the young Arab; then he translated the request of his superior. Samira replied, and Banks waited for her to finish. It was the first time Haruka had heard the girl speak, and the new image of Samira overlapped with the one she had of her: a frightened wren in the house where the Militias had slaughtered her family.

"She knows it, but she wanted to see you. She wish to thank you."

"She already thanked me. How did she find me?" Banks asked Samira who answered. "The girls of the house of welcome helped her to find the squad who did the blitz." Translated Richard.

Haruka scratched her head, before slipping off the sunglasses and resting them on the blonde mop.

"Tell her she has to go away."

"But Major she traveled a l-"

"She can't stay here, Banks."

The guy sighed, then repeated what the Major said. Samira lowered her gaze, evidently sad. Then murmured something.

"She said it was enough to see you."Richard communicated, but as he spoke he saw the young woman fall on her knees, and after grabbing Haruka's hands, start kissing them.

"Oh no. _No."_ Said Haruka trying to get away from her. "Leave me! What are you doing?"

Richard was surprised. "Major, uhm, with all due respect... does Samira know that-"

"Of course she knows, you idiot! How do you think I could reassure her and take her out of that house, if not with the _absolute certaint_ y that I could not rape her?"

Haruka catched Samira from her shoulders.

"Stop that. It's not necessary, really." She said shaking her a bit. Samira looked at her smiling. "It just was a bit _too much_."

"Really." Said Banks "Well, Major you saved her life."

"She will do little to do with life if she keeps coming here, a lonely girl who is more of a Shiite, and will get herself into trouble."

Richard nodded looking at the young Arabian. "So what shall we do?"

Haruka stayed quiet for a moment. "You'll take her back from where she comes."

"Good id- hey! Wait!"

Banks did not seem quite agree, but Haruka had already reached one of the guards and was instructing him to go get a jeep. The boy ordered Samira not to move, and followed Tenou to the entrance gate.

"Major, wait! Why should I bring her there?"

"Because I have to prepare a blitz for tomorrow morning."

Then Haruka brought her hands to her hips, fulminating Banks with her gaze.

"And since when do you dare disobeying my orders?"

"Since I have to do the driver through Tikrit."

"Listen, do you really want to go to search for you beloved _Advanced Grammar_ in the river Tigri,maybe after a good dive from _a trampoline in the ass?"_

Richard looked at her. "Major, when you do that you are really a _bitch_."

Haruka smiled. "Don't tell me too many compliments. I could get used to it."

Banks shook his head, silently cursing, and Haruka watched him retrace his steps toward Samira. The girl had followed the exchange between the two soldiers, and had returned to look at her. Then she lifted a hand in greeting, and the smile immediately returned to the face of the young woman, who bent to greet her and then raised her hand in turn.

Haruka set off for the camp entrance, and reflected on the fact that Samira seemed extremely happy. She had left her wounded and traumatized in a Red Cross hospital, and now it seemed that those few moments when she had the chance to be with her had solved her day. The fact that she had asked where to find the soldiers who had saved her was not entirely a good sign. Haruka put the Ray Ban back on, and hoped that Samira's interest in her would subside with time. Or that, at least, do not take an unwanted turn.

xdxdxdxdx 

_Medical Hospital "Edward Dewenish VA Medical Centre"_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _7 May 2008_

 _Day 18_

When Michiru entered in the room 4, Haruka was sitting on her usual chair; she had her eyes closed, her chin laid on her hand. She seemed to have drowsed, but the rhythm of her breathing did not support the thesis of sleep. She placed the folder on the armchair and looked at it for a long moment, realizing then that Haruka was no longer there.

Her mind had ended in a faraway place, sheltered from her indiscreet questions. Michiru knew that Tenou had to speak to treat herself, and she had learned that the other was hiding herself to protect herself. Whom or from what, first or later she would have find out, and not only for a professional duty, or a personal interest. Michiru started to _desire_ to know how to accede to that deep woman's soul, who pretended to be like a man to live the life she didn't want to. A life that her father decided for herself.

She kneeled in front of the chair, keeping looking at her. She needed to touch her, as if to be sure if Tenou really was in the room - physically at least, while her thoughts weren't at all; so in a gesture which surprised before herself, laying a hand gently caressing her check. She felt her becoming tensed below her touch and opening suddenly her eyes. The emerald gaze overwhelmed her for a second, then she came back.

"Where were you, eh?" Asked Michiru without taking her hand off of her check. "You went away, leaving me here."

Haruka didn't know what to say, surprised from that sudden touch.

"Where you in the same place where you harassed me?" Haruka shook her head.

"No, that was a good remember."

Michiru smiled. Then stand up and she took a sit on a chair. " would you like to tell me?"

The other sighed. She remained silent for a moment, pondering the request as usual: now Haruka was slightly more yielding, but with each question she always waited a few moments before answering, as if she was to carefully evaluating the words.

"What if I told you I don't want to?"

Michiru struggled. "Guess I'd find something else to ask you, until you won't answer me."

Tenou leaned forward the Doctor. " _You're pedant, and annoying_." But she put a hand to her chest, and exasperated a dreamy sigh.

"It's neither 10 am and you tell me all those compliments. I could get used to it, Major."

Haruka tried to stiffen a laugh, but it didn't work. And Michiru thought the other one should laugh more because her laugh sound had something very charming. Almost _musical._

"It usually is my joke, doc." Said before stretching her arms and legs before looking at the ceiling.

"I was thinking about one of my men, while I was stationed in Tikrit." Michiru looked on the sheets.

"Stationed in the 4th Fantery command?"

"Yes. Steadfast and Loyal." Said the other one in a solemn voice.

"What was his name?"

"Banks." Answered after a while.

"Was he a soldier of yours?"

Haruka nodded. "Simple Soldier Richard Banks class 1987. He was from New York, he studied oriental languages in Yale." She smiled, before keep going.

"He was my right arm, I trusted him as a brother."

"He was very young but he was not a foolhardy exalted. He was a thoughtful, extremely intelligent. And I called him a little woman."

Michiru arched an eyebrow " _ironic."_

"It's even more if you think that he _knew."_

The doctor was very surprised. "You trusted him so much that.."

"It was an accident." The other interrupted her. "We were supporting the blasters who had to defuse a couple of bombs in a town of Tikrit, with one spinning everything smooth, but the other, well, it was faulty, so while trying to neutralize the trigger, a part of the explosive jump."

Haruka leaned over to the doctor, took a white sheet from her folder and stole her pen.

"I do not know if you know," She began, making sketches on the paper.

"But they are often rude, rudimentary, assembled devices to create the greatest damage possible, not only to things but also to people." She lifted the paper, so that Michiru could see it: above it there were schematic signs to form square and rectangular shapes, with arrows pointing out the various parts.

"Often the explosive is blown up with blocks containing everything from glass to nails." The girl understood where Haruka wanted to go, and she felt a sick feeling at the thought.

"I said, the device shone, although not in all its potential, but we were hit by a rain of objects. Forale of the story: I found myself with two nails planted in the side .. It took a while 'before the rescue arrived, but I I had already taken them off and was biting the wound, I certainly would not have bled to death, but Banks was on the verge of a hysterical crisis. " Also Michiru smiled, like Haruka, at that image. "Richard was with me recently, and perhaps he was afraid of losing a point of reference, or perhaps I allowed him to get too attached to it, an error in which I have always, diabolically persevered." Haruka frowned for a moment, and the other noticed.

"Then?" Michiru said, "what happened?"

"He wanted to check the wound, to help me in healing that. He practically undressed me, and I was forced to tell him."

"How did he take it?" Michiru asked, thinking about his reaction.

"He said I had more _balls_ than so many men he had known, that I was a badass." The doctor laughed. "Well, this Richard was right."

"I had almost a thousand men under me in Tikrit." Haruka told her.

"Twentieth century in Mosul, when I commanded the 100th Battalion, 442th infantry, I had to be a bit of a wrist." Haruka rolled up the paper, and tossed it to the trashcan with a worn-out basketball player's move. Silence returned to the hall again.

"Do you know where he is now?" Michiru then asked, even if he sensed the answer. The other just moved his head.

"At the Long Island National Cemetery in the state of New York, close to his family." She told her in a flat, monotonous tone, and Michiru clearly saw the armor in which Haruka Tenou had shut up. The armor with which it detached itself from the external world and from the people that had known, in order not to suffer when these would not be there anymore. A mechanism, she thought, that had to be well established: Haruka had probably learned so well to leave a safe distance between herself and the world, and to relinquish her suffering under a flat, empty façade, which she was no longer capable of externalizing. She watched the other take a deep breath, passing a hand through her hair.

"Richard enlisted as a volunteer because he believed he could do good, he believed in what he was doing, we all believed it." A bitter smile curled Tenou's lips.

"And he was one of those people who immediately attracted sympathy, which is really hard not to love." She tilted her head before continuing.

 _"A little like you, doc_." Michiru was surprised. Then she smiled.

"This is a true compliment, though." The other shrugged, then stood up.

"Call that what you like, I'll go to the bathroom."

"Do not step out of the window with a sheet, I recommend." She joked the doctor, and the other smiled at the door.

"As if it were easy to get away from you, you'd probably look for me all over Virginia if you ran away." When she closed the door, Michiru returned to look at her notes.

"Yes, I would probably do it." Finally she muttered to herself.

 **xdxdxdxdx**

"Sugar!"

"Uar!" Repeated Hotaru bringing the sugar to Michiru.

If there had been a Kingdom of Chaos, probably at that moment the kitchen of the Kaioh house would have been a detached place: the table was covered with ingredients, stained here and there with flour; the sink full of crockery; the nearby shelf occupied by two bowls over which Michiru was busy working, with Hotaru beside her. From the corner of her eye the girl noticed an egg smashed on the ground, and sighing tried not to think about what time it would have finished rearranging that disaster, the result of full autonomy left to a little girl of just over three years in the preparation of ingredients for that day's cake. But it was The Day of the Sweet, set up by herself, and therefore she could not stand to disagree too much on the conditions of the kitchen. Michiru threw two tablespoons of sugar into the mixture, continuing to mix. Then she turned to Hotaru, whose face was stained with flour. She imagined that she herself should not have been so different, and she laughed.

"Hotaru who should end up in the oven? You or the cake?" She asked kissing her little nose "you are all covered of flour!"

"You also are _ditty!"_ Said the child jumping on the chair so that she was as tall as her mother.

"Be quiet, Hotaru, or you'll fall!" She scolded her good-naturedly, and the baby stopped.

The day of the cake was a pretext to recover a bit 'of time that Michiru could no longer pass with Hotaru. The job kept her busy until late afternoon, and the girl, once out of kindergarten - around four o'clock, waited for her to return with Jenny, the student who was babysitting her. Sometimes Michiru could not spend a lot of time with her once at home, between the things to be done and the reports to be drawn up. That's why she decided that once a week it would be Sweet Day, and that day it would be all about Hotaru, playing, cooking and doing things like girls.

"Mommaaaa! When do we finish?" The girl burst out, and Michiru switched off the electric whisk. "Now we have to add only the chocolate, and then put it in the oven." Michiru lifted Hotaru and placed her on the ground, filling her with kisses and raising her daughter's hilarity. "Go get it, come on!" It was while the little girl ran to another kitchen counter, which Michiru heard the phone ringing. She wiped her hands cleanly, and with a towel she also removed the flour from her face. When she grabbed the phone, he saw that the caller ID was unknown.

'May speak to Kaioh Michiru?' Said a female voice

"Yes, it's me."

'I'm Clara Tyron, of the Organizing Committee of the Harrison Opera House in Norfolk. Do you have a minute? " Michiru's heart skipped a beat. _The Harrison Opera House calling me? I think._ Their summer season was something astounding, with performances by exponents of classical music of the highest order. "Moooommm!" She called Hotaru, holding the tin of chocolate in both hands. Michiru covered the phone's microphone.

"Shut up a second treasure, it's important." Then she turned she attention back to the interlocutor. "Excuse me, would you say?"

'We were given your number by the Conservatory of Portsmouth, and we had excellent references from the Richmond Philharmonic. Lately she has performed with them, is not it? " Michiru did not know what to think.

"Yes, it is."

'Very well.' The other agreed. 'I wanted to propose that you perform here at Harrison, in a choral concert scheduled for the next twenty-eight May.' "Mommmmmmaaaaaaa !!" shouted Hotaru, her hands all completely inside the tin of chocolate. Michiru felt her head turn.

"A concert for Memorial Day? For the Day of the Fallen?"

'Exactly.' The first answer that emerged in Michiru's mind was No. She could not play that day. Just that day. But it was also the Opera House of Norfolk, that is an opportunity too important to pass up; she wondered if she would be able to hold it. Interpreting that silence as indecision, Clara was quick to add: 'You may not answer me right away. I can call you back tomorrow to tell me what she decided, Miss Kaioh. But realize that the concert is in three weeks and we'll need to have it here for the tests and- '

"Wait," she interrupted her. "I have a job, a little girl, I can not guarantee I can come to rehearsal, at least not always." Clara remained silent, then explained the details of the exhibition. Together they agreed that if she decided to perform, a solution would be found. By now Hotaru was dirty with chocolate to her hair, and she never stopped calling Michiru at regular intervals, whose time was beaten by a wooden spoon held in her right hand. The girl from the Opera House laughed.

'I think someone is trying to get your attention, Miss Kaioh.' She told her, and Michiru looked at the child, disconsolate. 'Then think about it, I recommend. It would be a shame if it was not for us as much as for your. " They said goodbye and Michiru closed the communication. The Harrison Opera House, he thought dreamily.

"Mom!" The girl went back to the kitchen, and Hotaru's white teeth rose from the brown of her face; Michiru smiled and held her up.

"Let's put this cake in the oven, but you'll end up straight in the shower." But then, looking at the little girl at three hundred and sixty degrees, including clothes, she thought better of it. "Or maybe directly in the washing machine ..."

 **xdxdxdxdx**

 _ **Medical Hospital "Edward Dewenish VA Medical Centre"**_

 _ **Portsmouth, Virginia**_

 _ **8 May 2008**_

 _ **Day 19**_

Thud. Thud. Thud.

Michiru lifted up her head from the documents, running her gaze at Haruka, who from her chair didn't stop throwing her anti stress ball towards the wall, making it land on the floor before catching it.

"You're sorry?" Asked ironic the doctor, the other one neither looked at her.

"Absolutely not, go on."

Thud.

The girl shook her head, giving some documents to Haruka. "Here we are, mark below here. Next to the date."

Haruka blocked the ball and took the documents for give them a look. "I'm not used to mark anything unless I give a look at it." 

"Then read them, but they're just hospital-internal protocols. I began admission, insurance data, things that you could not get signed at the beginning of your stay here at the Dewenish Inn. " The girl peered at the doctor from behind the paper, then went back to reading it. Michiru stood up and headed for the window of her office, sliding it downward to open it. 

"Take my curiosity," she told her, leaning on the glass with her back. "How could you never find out in West Point?" Haruka had her face on her hands, elbows on the table, and was intent on reading.

"I did not sleep in the dorms with the others, I had my room."

"And with the other boys?" 

"I isolated myself from them," continued the other. "They thought I was a dick snob just because I was the daughter - _or rather, the son_ \- of Tenou, but I could not have made friends even if I wanted to - in any case I've never been _Miss Company,_ so ... " Michiru returned to the desk, sitting down.

"And on a physical level?" Haruka scribbled the signatures, then tilted her head. 

"Well, that was the minor problem, I'm not exactly Marylin Monroe, doc, I do not know if you've noticed." The doctor smiled.

"I would say more Annie Lennox." 

"I would say, yes, having an androgynous body helped me a lot, in the end it was enough to cut my hair." She remained thoughtful for a moment. "Damn, I could have given me a career in rock, I never thought about it." She concluded with a smile, then started humming Sweet Dreams. Michiru laughed, and that laugh greeted Mamoru's entry into the office, after a quick knock. 

"Dr. Chiba," She greeted him at attention, Haruka, then holding out her hand to tighten it. Mamoru offered his own.

"Major Tenou, I think Dr. Kaioh is doing a great job." He began that once the grip was broken. "I find it well, certainly better than the last time." The man thought of the girl lying on the ground under the weight of the nurses, the pale face and the eyes filled with adrenaline, shortly after trying to strangle Michiru. 

"Have you seen, I'm training her properly." Joked Michiru, approaching Haruka. 

"In a little while she will also _give her paw_ and sit on command." In response, Tenou cocked her head to the side and made 'Wouf'.

"How did you come in?"she asked then.

"I locked the door."

" _The locker is broken_." Quickly said Mamoru, then a doubt came into his mind. "You use to _lock_ yourselves in?"

"Well of course." Haruka quickly said, receiving the curious gazes of Mamoru and Michiru. "Doc is _insatiable,_ she never gives me time to breath." 

"Yeah, you'd like that." Said Michiru while walking towards the library. 

"I lock up because someone's sex is almost a state secret, and I would like to prevent the news from reaching indiscreet ears."Haruka repeated what her doctor had just said, making her the verse. Mamoru nodded, then put his hands in the pockets of the gown. "About that, Michiru..."

"Yes I have to pay attention about styled relationships,"

He smiled "thank you."

"You don't have to thank me." Said her "I still haven't forgave you for hiding me something like that..." 

Mamoru tolled his eyes and Michiru turned to Haruka "Could you please wait me in room 4? I'll be there in a second." 

Haruka didn't answer yet she stands up. She said goodbye to Chiba then took the anti stress ball. 

"The ball stays here. Or I should start thinking you are to _report_?" 

"You are sour." Said Haruka but the doctor didn't mind that. "Like _someone_ I know." Michiru said smiling.

Haruka disappeared behind the door, and Mamoru -who observed the scene with curious eyes- and then took a sit.

"Wow. You _get on very well."_ The man didn't know how else to describe what he just saw.

"It's enough for me." Said Michiru. "Haruka is slowly getting better. Maybe she just understood she can trust us... that she can trust _me._ I think that the _accident_ helped us."

Mamoru nodded. "How are you instead?" Asked her then.

The girl nodded. "I was called by the Harrison Opera House. I was asked to come to a meeting for the _Memorial Day."_

"Oh." Was the only thing Mamoru could think. 

"Are you going to accept?"

"I don't know. I honestly don't know if I can do it. You know too well what means for me _every year, facing that day."_

"You always told you couldn't make it with Tenou, and here you are. You are doing great."

Michiru leaned on the desk, her hands on her face. "I do know it. But I'm afraid to exaggerate, Mamoru. Haruka, the concert, I'm afraid to exaggerate, that I can't stand at it."

"I think you should accept instead. It's a _unique happening."_

"I should go three afternoons a week in Norfolk for rehearsals, how can I do it with Hotaru and with the job?"

"With Hotaru it's not a problem," Mamoru reassured her. "We and Usako can help you, as far as work is concerned, you can use the hours of leave."Michiru sighed, then got up from the desk.

"I do not know, really, they call me back tonight, and they want an answer."

"Accept." The man was peremptory, approaching her. "I believe Mitsuo wanted this, Michiru."The girl did not answer, and grabbed the clipboard. "I really have to go," She murmured, heading for the door and exiting. She reached Room 4, and found it open. But above all empty.

 _Where the hell is her?_ She thought. 

She walked along the corridor, peering into the rooms she met. Nothing in the other meeting rooms, nothing in the dining room. She went to the hospital ward, but she was not even in her room.

"Any problem?" A male voice asked Michiru. "No problem, Samuel." 

Foster approached to the girl and looked sceptically her, "you seem worried."

"I lost Haruka."

"Haruka... you mean Major Tenou?" 

"Do you know any other?" Asked sarcastic Michiru "I told him to wait for me in room 4, but he's not there." 

"Well, isn't he a bit too much _grown up_ to worry about?"

Michiru ignored his being ironic. Then a thought flashed her mind. "And if he has had another crisis?"

The girl's mind began to think of scenarios that might have triggered the violent nature of Haruka, but Foster put a hand on her shoulder, looking for her.

"If it happened, we would have already known, do not you think?"The other thought about it for a moment, then nodded.

"I'll help you find him," Samuel told her. "Let's try and see if they saw him on the first floor. Maybe he just went for a walk in the park."They walked back into the corridor, and Foster could not help himself. "Michiru since when Major Tenou become _Haruka?"_

The girl rolled her eyes. "Samuel, would you like to help me or not?" 

"Ok, never mind."

A reddish-haired boy crossed the elevators, scratching his head with the same hand he was holding his baseball cap. He held a piece of paper in his hand and the logo of a musical instrument store stood out on the faded sweatshirt. He seemed confused.

"Excuse me, where do I find Dr. Chiba's office?" He asked the two doctors, calling their attention. Dr. Foster was quicker to answer, and pointed to the way to go. That was about to leave, when Michiru thought it best to ask him if he had even just crossed a tall blond boy.

"Uh, the _stub_ , like not." The young man said, and Michiru's heart began to circulate the blood in her body. "He came with me downstairs, in the room where I unloaded the cello, where did you say Dr. Chiba? He must sign the delivery note."

"Samuel bring him there, please."

It was Michiru peremptory, slipping into the elevator and pushing the button on the first floor, thus freeing herself from Foster. She walked briskly through the wide space that opened in front of her, and while she saw the indications of the Music Therapy room, she heard her. A slow, extremely sweet melody, muffled by the walls between her and the room where the sound came from. She slowed her pace, letting herself be guided by the so reassuring sound that entered her soul, reassuring her. She leaned into the room, leaning against the white door where the Music Therapy plaque stood out, and what she saw made her hold her breath. Haruka was sitting at the grand piano, intent on playing. The face was concentrated in the memory of the right keys to press, yet it seemed that the music easily came from the hands, without particular effort. Around her several other musical instruments, and leaning against the wall, still covered by plastic packaging, the cello that the company had unloaded earlier. Michiru felt enveloped by the melody: she analyzed times, pauses, scales and chords. It was not a complex execution, not even a _Sunday pianist song_. She was amazed at the intense sweetness of that sound, which almost screeched with the Haruka she was used to knowing. Yet she never doubted for a moment that the feeling that Tenou was putting into music was not more than authentic. A discordant note broke the magic of the moment, and the melody broke off. 

"Shit," Haruka murmured, closing her eyes and trying to get back to her.

"It does not matter, go on" The girl turned to the door, to see Michiru enter the room and approach the piano, the cobalt-colored look of emotion. "Please, Haruka, go on." But that shook her head, closing the keyboard.

"I do not remember her any better, it would be painful, doc." "What I have heard so far was anything but painful." Michiru tried to hide the disappointment as she detached herself from the instrument and sat in the narrow stool, next to the other. She felt Haruka stiffen, and had further confirmation of how much Tenou did not like the invasion of her personal space.

"Why you didn't tell me you played? You are very good."

"I did." Said Haruka struggling. 

"No, you told me your mother played. And right now I even know what."

Haruka smiled and reopening the white keyboard, she caressed the white keys. 

"She sat me downstairs for the first time I was maybe four years old, and she let me strum them between rehearsals, and she loved the torments I produced."Michiru smiled, and thought about how Haruka should be as a child. She could not find another adjective than _adorable_.

"Your mother had to be a wonderful woman, what was her name?"

"Emily, Emily Woodsbridge." Tenou stayed quiet for a while. "Her biggest disgrace was to have married my father." Said then, anger in her voice.

Michiru shook her head. "Don't say like that. She wouldn't have had _you_ if she hadn't met him."

A bitter smile appeared on Haruka's features. 

"Great lucky, ne?"

"How did they get to know?" Said trying to reach her gaze.

"A classic concert. In Washington. It was an event organized for the commemoration of Vietnam's veterans, and at the end of the exhibition my father asked to be introduced. It must be a family thing. "

The girl did not grasp. "What?"

"Finding the fascinating musicians." Tenou smiled, looking at her as she blushed.

"Ah, I got you again."Michiru hit her arm, rising from the stool.

"I will ask Mamoru for the keys to this hall." She then communicated her, diverting the speech.

"I would like to hear you play again, I will put it in your therapy program."Haruka crossed one leg, leaning on the end of the piano.

"I would like to hear you, doc."They looked at each other in silence for a long moment.

"As soon as there will be an opportunity." Michiru told her in a smile. "I promise you."

 **xdxdxdxdx**

Michiru lifted up Hotaru from the sofa where she fall asleep, and brought her to her bedroom. She put her under sheets, and after kissing her, closed the door, coming back to the kitchen table. Some strands weren't at their place in the ponytail she just did. And she put them behind her ears.

She gathered some sheets, switched off the laptop, switched on the recorder thinking about her progress. " _Michiru Kaioh, continuing of before. Like I was telling, hearing Haruka play had been a great surprise,_ _through music she expressed a self that otherwise -_ I'm sure _\- she would never ever let it leak out._ "She heard a thunder in the distance, and peered into the darkness beyond the window _." Haruka is a concentrate of compressed emotions. , of feelings that she is unable to express and that hides under her cynical and detached behavior, even if - another surprise - today she said she wanted me to play. "_ She could not help but smile _." I decided to accept the offer of 'Norfolk Opera House, and to hold the Memorial Day concert. I'll make sure she can come with us. "_ She pressed the recorder's stop button, pulled out the tape and put it back in the case, where she had written with a marker _Tenou- day 19._

She went to the toilet and then, finally she fell into the bed. In the silence she heard the rain hit the glass, and her last thought before falling asleep, was for Haruka. By that weather, the pain of her shoulder was surely back.

 **Author's notes: yes! I did it! I'm sorry I couldn't update yesterday, I had some things to do for school :-/. Anyway here is the new, chapter! Something more about Haruka's past and a little about Michiru's.**

 **I know what you are asking for: who's Mitsuo? Read to find out. Ahaha. Until next time this is Milla23!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Enjoy the chapter! :-)**

 **Black Holes**

 _Military Hospital "Edward Dewenish VA Medical Centre"_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _9 May 2008_

 _Day 20_

She sat on the bed, her head in her hands.

The sweat sticked her hair on her forehead, while that hot night gave her pain on her shoulder. She bit her lower lip when, while moving the shoulder, heard its cracking.

The nightmare that had awakened her had been nothing short of _tremendous_ , but _illuminating_ , in some respects. The cold under her feet was gone, the plants now used to the linoleum floor. She got up and, in the darkness, headed for her bedroom door. The light of the corridor swept over her, and oneiric fragments seized her mind overwhelmingly. "Major Tenou?" Called the night shift nurse cautiously. The image in her head dissolved, and she looked at the girl.

"I'm thirsty, what time is it?" She then asked, and the other raised the sleeve of the hospital uniform. "Quarter past three." She remained thoughtful for a moment, noticing a certain disturbance in the military.

"Do you want me to call you the doctor on duty?" But Haruka shook her head.

"No. I just want to drink something." She walked along the corridor, thinking about where the vending machine was. She rummaged in the pants of the suit she used to sleep, hoping to find some change, but the operation did not have the desired result. She passed in front of the baths, and considered that the tap water could be better than nothing. She pushed open the door of the men's, and entered: the row of washbasins, topped by mirrors, opened to her sight. She opened a faucet and leaned on the jet of water, wetting her lips and drinking greedily. She put both hands on the edge of the sink, remaining for a few moments to observe the flow of liquid. And when she raised her head, her image looked at her. She saw a face, by all accounts _perfect_ , to which it was impossible to remain indifferent. She saw the tangled hair, the skin without imperfections, the severe eyes intent on that meticulous examination. But she _saw_. She saw _beyond_. She saw the _rotten_. Like _Dorian Gray_ , and the portrait that aged but mostly rotten, taking upon herself the moral corruption of the young man, her vices and her debauchery, while that remained perfect. Very beautiful. Haruka wondered where her picture was. Because nobody could see how she was, in reality, _terrible_. She turned the tap to stop the flow of water. She closed her eyes, and the image of the nightmare came back violent. Those aquamarine hair, in the cell of the loculus, on the body poured out between blood and dust. She had to finish it. She had to prevent her from continuing to look for her, to reassure her. To _touch_ her, as she always did. A _contact_ to which she was getting used to, but who had to break, to break. With a clean cut, or it would have been even more painful. And to do it she had to hurt her, there was no other way. She had to move her away, or she would have done the end of everyone else. Even her reflection reopened her eyes to look at her: the disgust she felt for her own image exploded violently, all together. And without thinking, she punched the mirror, shattering it.

 **xdxdxdxdx**

_Military Hospital "Edward Dewenish VA Medical Centre"_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _12 May 2008_

 _Day 23_

It was official: Haruka was avoiding her.

Michiru couldn't understand the because about Haruka's behaviour, unless she was doing anything she could to not be able to have her psychologist meetings.

First there was the request for shoulder physiotherapy, which Mamoru - snake in the bosom, to line up with the enemy - had granted her. Then the meetings with the therapist who followed the patients of the music therapy, although at the time it was absolutely impossible to play due to twelve stitches on the right hand, resulting in a quarrel with one of the bathroom mirrors, several nights before; and in spite of herself she had all the credentials to support a musical psychotherapy, but so be it. Initially she had thought it was fatigue that made her unhappy: between the hospital, the tests in Norfolk and Hotaru, she had very little time to recover her energy. And, after all, it could also be plausible - though decidedly unlikely - that Haruka would later ring, in those few days, a list of ailments ranging from headaches to flu. Leprosy and legionella were missing, and she would complete the album. She sat down in her office chair, holding a pen to her lips, and thought about the day she had seen her at the piano: that had been one of the highest peaks of their therapy, and yet that same night something had gone wild in Haruka, bringing it back to close in its cocoon when it was finally starting to see the butterfly.

What she had seen, in that mirror, so much so as to push her to pour into an undoubtedly long-suppressed anger, Michiru ignored him completely. She sighed, looking at her watch: quarter to eleven. Even that night Haruka had rested badly and asked her to let her sleep a little longer. This is why she was amazed when, approaching the window to open it, she could see her basking in the sun in the park, sitting on a bench. And above all, in company. Once the amazement was over, she was initially happy for the other. In all that time she had never received visits, and seeing a friendly face could only do them well. But all that altruism was subsequently swept away by a certain resentment, surfaced from a corner of the mind. Not only because she had made fun of her, but also because it was not fair that Tenou was out there chatting, while she was all intent on reasoning and why it was so obvious to avoid her.

' _What are you thinking about?'_ She scolded herself sitting on her desk. She took her pen and one of the _report_ she would have brought Mamoru.

She tried to concentrate on the reading, but after some tries she gave up.

She stood up and walked towards the door ' _Go and stop their conversation'_ her mind kept saying. And after all, she was her doctor, so plunging her into a visit by a third party would have been entirely justified.

Once on the ground floor she headed for the park, and saw them again. Haruka had not changed her pose since she had seen her at the window; she had her legs crossed, with her elbow on the back of the bench. The mask of indifference that had resumed wearing in the last days slightly cracked by the corners of the lips just bent upwards. A girl sat in front of her, of whom Michiru could only see her back covered with a denim jacket. She had red hair gathered in a bun, and every so often her hands entered her field of vision, the result of gesticulating that in her story. Michiru approached with studied indifference, but saw the change of expression on the face of Tenou when she saw her: that slight smile disappeared, and Michiru was left with stone.

"Ehi, I was looking for you." Said to Haruka. The red-haired girl stopped her story, turning towards the doctor: Michiru crossed her gaze with the light blue of the girl and tried to hide a shocked face in from of the teenager's features of the girl, who now smiled. ' _How old is she?'_ Michiru thought.

"Liar."

Haruka's voice distracted her from concerns about possible legal consequences for Tenou, if the girl there had been _more_ than a friend. "I saw you looking at me from the window, you knew very well where I was."

"Actually, I thought you were sleeping," she pointed out, "since you asked me to postpone the session for your lack of sleep."

The red-haired girl looked worried. "Did I come at the wrong time?"

"Oh no, do not worry." Michiru reassured her, holding out her hand. "I'm Dr. Kaioh, Major Tenou's doctor, very pleased."

She jumped up and squeezed it in turn. "Hi, I'm Rebecca, but you can call me Becky, my pleasure."

Michiru could not help but associate Becky with a kind of elf, and smiled. Then she turned back to Haruka.

"How do you feel?"

"Before you arrived, I was fine." Michiru inclined her head.

"Did you leave kindness in your room, Haruka?" Sarcastic churches, and Becky laughed. "How's your shoulder?"

"It's okay."

"And the hand?"

"Jesus, how heavy you are." She scolded her, stretching her arms over her head.

"Come on, do not do that." Becky intervened. "The doctor is worried."

"Do not worry, Becky, if he does not complain, then he's not happy." Haruka snapped her lips in disappointment, and Michiru continued:

"Since I do not think you have other commitments, I wait for you in Room 4 when you are done." A loud snort was the only answer from the other.

"Hi Rebecca, I'll see you." The doctor took her leave, returning to the hospital. Both Haruka and Becky stood looking at her for a moment. "Wow." Then said the girl, turning to Tenou.

"If she's as good as she is beautiful, you're in good hands." The other did not disappear.

"Actually I'm thinking of making me change doctors." Becky looked amazed. "And why?" Haruka remained silent for a long moment. Then she preferred to ask how she was going to school.

x

Michiru looked disconsolately at the dark liquid in the plastic cup, waiting for the 'beep' of the machine to signal that her coffee - or the substitute that the company responsible for distributors continued to sell as 100% Arabica - was ready. Needless to say, Haruka did not show up in Room 4, so much so she could have a coffee and go out first to the hospital, to spend some time with Hotaru: she had no proof in Norfolk, and she could have totally devoted herself to her little angel .

"You should not be in session?" Mamoru's voice reached his ears as he reached out for his plastic cup.

"Where's Haruka?"

"There's the Washington Wizards game," Michiru told him, when he approached and typed the choice of his drink on the dispenser.

"Is she watching the NBA instead of talking to you?" "So it seems." The other was laconic. Mamoru remained silent, then smiled.

"Do not let the situation get out of hand." He told her then, taking his long coffee.

"The only thing that escapes me, more than the situation, is Haruka, she's avoiding me." "Yet a few days ago-"

"A few days ago she even punched the mirrors of the men's bathroom, did you know that?" The man nodded.

"From time, Michiru... Tenou ..." he lowered his voice, "she's not used to opening herself like that with people, and she may have started seeing something very similar to a friend in you, and she must get used to it."

Michiru sighed. "I would just like to help her, Mamoru, if she rejects me, like-" she stopped when she saw someone beyond his friend's shoulders. She turned, too, and the outline of a tawny-haired girl entered her field of vision.

"Rebecca!" Called Michiru, and she turned to the source of the voice, then smiling at the doctor when she recognized her. Michiru quickly greeted Mamoru and approached the girl.

"I thought you'd been gone for a while, since Haruka is upstairs watching the game." Becky shook her head.

"Actually I do not have a car, I'm waiting for a friend of mine to pick me up, so I thought I'd take a ride." A thought crossed Michiru's mind. Becky was there, at her disposal; a link between her and Haruka's life before she knew her. It was an unmissable opportunity. "Rebecca ..."

"Becky." The other corrected her. "Call me Becky."

"All right, Becky, would you give me a minute?" She asked her gently.

"I'd like to talk to you about a couple of things about Haruka." The concern veiled the young man's gaze.

"Why, is there something wrong?"

"Absolutely no." She hastened to reassure her. "It is that Haruka has never received visits so far, so I would like to have a chat with someone who-" She paused, considering how to turn to Tenou. She went for the most obvious and less risky.

"That knows him a little better."

"It's not that I know him so well," said the other on the defensive, and Michiru knew from that sentence that, in fact, the young woman in front of her ignored the true sex of Haruka.

"I only steal you a few minutes, come on in. Let's go to my office." She took her arm in arm, and the other allowed himself to be taken to the elevator and to Kaioh's office. "How old are you, Becky?" The churches, when they were seated in the room. "Eighteen," was the other, and Michiru could not prevent the same bewilderment of when she had seen her for the first time, a few hours before, back. Haruka, what are you doing? "And you study? Works?"

"I'm finishing high school, and I do some chores to put money aside for the University."

"But you're really smart," Michiru complimented, and the other just blushed, looking down. "Where do you work?"

"Now I work in a Virginia Beach restaurant called _Bella Italia_ , it's right on the beach, very nice."

She remained thoughtful for a few moments. "And they say the pay is good, even if I do not know yet, since I started working on it last weekend." Michiru smiled, then thought a second about Becky working at Virginia Beach. "Even your previous job was in those parts?" Becky looked at her in amazement. "Well yes, I thought you knew." Michiru answered in amazement with amazement. "Actually, no, why should I have known?"

"I thought Haruka had told you about the bar." The doctor linked those words to the police report and photos of those two guys beaten by Tenou. "Did you work in the bar where Haruka was involved in the fight?" Becky frowned, nodding. "Seriously he did not tell you anything?" She then asked her, almost murmuring. Michiru gave a negative answer.

"Haruka is not exactly what one can call a logorroic, Becky, so I'm asking you to help me out." The young woman remained silent, then after a long sigh she began to tell her of the somersaults made to be able to track down the military. And from there, like a river in flood, she told her about the Virginia Beach Bar, Michael Papadakis, Johnatan Brown and the circumstances in which she had met Major Haruka Tenou.

And while that was talking, a horrible thought began to form in Michiru's mind.

x

An ovation greeted the basket from three of the Wizards' pivots in the Refreshment Hall, and Haruka merely nodded as a wheelchair-bound lieutenant - hospitalized for surgery at the dock, following an incident in Afghanistan - did nothing but say how good was that purchase in the draft at the beginning of the season. The game had already resumed and the quiet was back when Michiru entered the room; Haruka only noticed when her visionaries began to greet Dr. Kaioh.

"Can you come with me, please?" She asked her in a whisper.

Tenou immediately realized something was wrong, and glancing at her doctor confirmed it.

She seemed troubled, and if she initially wanted to reply that the second quarter had just begun and the Wizards were winning, thus continuing her strategy of indifference, seeing her like that made her change her mind. And she got nervous, not only because she could not explain the reason, but also because in doing so she frustrated her efforts in ignoring her completely.

The boy in a wheelchair nudged her.

"Oh, if you do not want to go, I'll gladly go, eh!" Haruka did not even answer him, and slowly got up to bring Michiru closer. The doctor walked towards the corridor, in silence, followed by an equally silent Haruka. Once inside the office, Michiru let the girl in and turned the latch to lock - realizing only after the uselessness of that gesture, since the lock was still broken. Then she leaned against the door. Haruka sat on the edge of the desk, crossing her legs and arms across her chest. "So I bet on that pa-"

"What did they do to you in Iraq, Haruka?" Tenou's eyes widened at the question shot at point-blank range. Michiru did not move from where she was.

"What did they do to you in those two weeks when you were a Militia prisoner?"

"Like," Haruka said, after a moment needed to absorb the words. "How did it happen to you?"

"Do not answer me with another question." Silence filled the room, and Michiru did not know if she would be able to support it.

"I'm not going to talk about it." The other was dry after a long moment.

"You've avoided me enough, now answer me."

"I have nothing to say to you."

"I spoke to Becky." Haruka realized the implication of that phrase, and looked at her bewildered.

"She told me everything." Michiru broke away from the door, approaching the other.

"She told me about how the two of them had not done anything but to bother her for the whole evening, inside the bar, and they told me how once they finished the shift they waited her out, and tried to abuse her."

Haruka swallowed, and closed her eyes. The _loculus_ , which had so struggled to keep away, filled her mind again.

Like that evening, in the alley behind the bar, when she heard Becky's requests for help. The alcohol in her body was immediately vaporized, in the seething of her blood.

And she was back there. _Cut me this fucking throat_!

"She told me how you intervened to save her, letting her escape while you were there to beat them."

Michiru's voice was extremely close now. "Watch me." She opened her eyes to that request, driving away the images of her worst nightmare.

Michiru was there, just a few steps away from her. A safe harbor, where it could not land. Or she would have destroyed it.

"On the police report there is written that the fight had sprung from futile reasons, and I always assumed that the violent behavior had been amplified by alcohol and PTSD." She explained.

"How could she not file a complaint?"

"The owner of the place pressured her to not do it, to avoid problems, and I was not exactly in a position to explain to the police why I wanted to kill those two disgusting creeps." Haruka told her, without looking at her.

"She was very scared, I told her to run away, and she did not have to repeat it twice."

"You were brave."

"What should I have done?" She just raised her tone of voice, planting the emerald irises in the heavenly ones of Kaioh.

"Let those make their comfortable?"

"How did they do with you?" Michiru's voice shook slightly as she spoke that phrase, and Haruka knew how far the mind of that woman had worked.

"You reacted like that because-"

"You're off-road, doc. Totally." The other interrupted her, shaking her head.

"Did they know you're a woman?"

"No." The other was dry.

"They only noticed it at the end, during the blitz that freed me." That answer did not give her any comfort. Michiru sighed, and repeated the initial question again.

"What did they do there, Haruka?"

"They did not do anything to me."

"If you do not tell me, I will order a gynecological examination." Haruka tilted her head. "And how will you justify it, uh? I remind you that for most people, I am a man."

"We'll go to another hospital, I'll take you there if necessary. Tell me what they did to you."

The other stood up, moving away from Michiru.

"But what language do I have to tell you? They did not do anything to me, damn it! NOTHING!" Haruka almost shouted that last word, and the doctor tried not to be overwhelmed by that reaction. She understood that she was touching a very painful point, but she needed to know: the only thought that Haruka had reacted so violently to rescue Becky because in Iraq, while she was a prisoner, she had the same fate, made her physically ill.

But she also wanted to help Tenou get rid of the terrible weight that she had realized, had to be the period of imprisonment; an event, the one on which the Haruka annihilation process lay for the most part. In response, Michiru followed the girl, approaching her and holding out a hand to touch her face, but Haruka pushed her head away so violently that the doctor was afraid she could break off her neck.

Now she looked at her with that cold and empty gaze: the mask was firmly back in place.

"Tell me what happened to you." Churches for the umpteenth time. "My problem is not Iraq, Michiru." She heard herself answer after a long silence. "My problem is you." The doctor was not astonished at that statement, even though she felt deeply wounded.

One thing was to have understood it from her attitudes, quite another to hear it without many preambles.

"Me, as a Haruka person? As a woman?" She asked her then, giving herself a tone. "Or is the problem the friendship I am trying to offer you, and which you refuse? Haruka did not answer and murmured something, then tried to scratch her head with her bandaged hand.

"Do you want to know what happened to me in Iraq, Michiru?" She finally asked her, looking her straight in the eye. She knew that she would not give in easily, and realized it was time to hit low. To hurt her, for her sake.

"You want tales from Iraq, uh ... Okay, you'll have them, but then let's start from the beginning, right?" Michiru did not find the tone of challenge in the words of the other encouraging, and listened to her continue.

"Now I'll tell you something really strange that happened to me, let's see a little," she pretended thoughtfully, bringing her healthy hand to her chin. "Right, it was 2004. The year they moved me from Mosul to Tikrit." She paused studied.

"Do you know what I commanded in Mosul?" She saw Kaioh's face just lose color, and tried not to be influenced.

"The 100th Battalion, 442th Infantry, which, if I did not know, is the department where all the American-Japanese soldiers are gathered in the army, but you know that very well, Michiru." The doctor swallowed, supporting Tenou's gaze.

"I did not ask you this."

"But the patient is me, so I decide what to tell." Shut her up Haruka, before resuming her story.

"So, I was saying, it was 2004, and from the Pentagon they ordered me to go to the 4th Infantry Division in Tikrit, in a much warmer area, if you understand what I mean." She snapped her lips and shook his head, emphasizing a disbelief that she did not feel at all.

"When fate is said, Michiru: A few days after my transfer, kamikaze attacked the base of Mosul. Haruka was silent for a few moments, studying Michiru's reactions. Reactions that did not seem to come.

"But there is something really curious, doc. Just the day I left, one of my men came to me to get me to sign the permission to lice-"

"Haruka, stop it." The other interrupted her, now livid in the face. Haruka realized she had hit the parathy. Now she had to sink it.

"Do not interrupt me." She said, "he was a pretty young boy."

"A Sergeant, I think. He did not stop telling me that he had recently married and - "

"Stop that." Michiru punctuated the simple word with an icy tone, but Haruka noticed that the girl's eyes had become clear.

"Why do I have to stop, uh?" She asked her, raising her chin, challenging her.

"Because I know you lied to me, when I asked you if there was a Kaioh in the army, Michiru, I know it's there, or at least it was." They looked at each other for an interminable moment, then Michiru turned on her heels and headed for the door. When she tried to open it, Haruka closed it violently, slamming her healthy hand over it and preventing her from going out. "Let me out, or I'll tie you back to bed."

"Did he die that day in Mosul?" Haruka urged her as she pulled the door toward her.

"Sergeant Kaioh is dead, Michiru?"

"Let me out!" She intimated her, clinging to the handle. "Answer me!"

"You do not know a _shit_ about me!" Michiru shouted at that point, pointing at her index finger.

"Stop it, do you understand? You have to stop it because _you do not know a shit_!" Haruka saw the tears fill the doctor's eyes, and after a long moment broke away from the door, letting the other escape like a fury. She remained alone in Kaioh's office, and threw her head back, looking at the ceiling. That was all she wanted: to be happy. After all moving away from Michiru was what she wanted.

x

 _The ramp seemed endless, as she climbed the stairs two by two. She could not wait for the elevator to arrive, it would take too long. She saw the landing, and some of the waiting neighbors._

 _"Miss Michiru!" Called one, relieved, as soon as he saw her._

 _"We have already warned the police, they are coming." Said another, middle-aged. She pushed the key of the apartment into the lock with a trembling hand, while from beyond the door she could hear Hotaru's crying, so violent that it became convulsive._

 _When she opened it, the first thing that struck her was the smell._

 _"Mitsuo!" She called, but received no answer. She crossed the spacious living room, and when she reached the sleeping area, she saw blood flowing from the bathroom to the middle of the corridor. As if in a trance, she took a few steps back, finding herself facing a door with the plastic shape of Snow White hanging on it, and under the words 'Hotaru' in ideograms._

 _She swallowed, then put her hand on the handle and pushed open the door._

"Mom..." Michiru suddenly opened her eyes, and tears slipped down her cheeks, deprived of the lid of her eyelids. With a short breath she sat up, holding one hand on her chest. Hotaru looked at her puzzled. "Mom ... are you crying?" Churches widening the purple eyes. The girl looked at her for a long moment, the vagaries of her still newborn to fill her ears. With a quick movement, she stretched out her arms and held the little girl to herself, letting the tears wash away from her eyes the images of that memory, which had become a nightmare.

x

She could not drive away that feeling of uneasiness. The more she tried, the more teary Kaioh's face returned to her head, leaving her dismayed. She had done it for her, to protect her, she told herself. But she could not draw the consolation she had imagined at the beginning, when she had decided to behave in that petty way.

She looked at the starry sky above her, and let a sigh fall in the fresh May air.

Evading the surveillance was all too easy, it was enough for the nurse of the night shift to be able to sneak out.

She smiled at the thought that if Chiba had known it, he probably would have blown some heads.

She wondered what Michiru would do, to know about it at night outside the hospital, lying on one of the park benches. She had thought about it all evening, preventing her from getting to sleep.

And no matter how much she had achieved her purpose, she now realized she wanted her near. As dangerous as it may be, her monstrous selfishness now demanded the friendship of Kaioh.

Because she was the link to a normality that she had lost, a social interaction without falsehood or preconceived schemes. For her it was simply Haruka, without rank, without uniform.

Michiru was warmth, something she could not believe could be granted again. Not after what she had seen. Not after what she had done. She surrendered, finally, to the discomfort that accompanied the memory of her actions in the doctor's office, and was aware of the fact that, to get rid of it, she would have to face Michiru again. But she was not sure if Kaioh would offer her another chance now.

x

 _Military Hospital "Edward Dewenish VA Medical Centre"_

 _14 May 2008_

 _Day 25_

Michiru stood up from the desk, and dragged a stool in front of the bookcase. The lower floors no longer had room for that new binder, and so she climbed the little footstool to reach the top shelf.

"Come on," she said, when she heard a knock. She thought it must be Samuel, who came to bring her coffee, so she kept her back to the door.

"Excuse me for a second Samuel," she was saying, poised on the stool, when a hand that had two large patches on the back and several abrasions and abrasions on the knuckles appeared in her field of view, helping to push the large file on the shelf. Michiru looked down, crossing the emerald color of Haruka, and a slight exclamation left the doctor's lips.

"Do you have a minute?" Asked her Haruka, taking her hands and helping her get off the stool.

They stood opposite each other, and Michiru recalled the targeted wickedness of the previous days. At the words that he had addressed, and the nightmares that had triggered.

She wondered what brought her there, whether the will of a new fight or something else, and considered that avoiding it would be the same as doing her game.

"Of course I have a minute." Finally she told her in a smile.

"I'm here for you." Haruka scratched the back of her head and lowered her eyes. Despite everything, Michiru was welcoming her with open arms.

"I ..." She began, not really sure what to say. She opted for sincerity.

"I am a black hole, Michiru." The other inclined her head, intrigued by that statement.

"I draw people around me." Tenou explained, without crossing her gaze.

"It's something that always happened to me, it's my curse."

"It's called charm," Michiru enlightened her. "And there's nothing wrong with having charm, indeed."

"It's more than that." Haruka sighed, and the doctor caught a note of suffering in the words of the other.

"You see, Michiru ... I have done things I do not pride myself in. I do not pride myself in anything, and clearly I had to be punished for my actions." She found the courage to look at Kaioh, who listened attentively.

"I can not keep anyone around me tied up, be it for friendship, for love, or for a whole range of other feelings, including hate, but punctually these people end up sucked, and inexorably destroyed." She paused, before resuming.

"I'm sorry for how I behaved, but I did it to protect you." Michiru was surprised by that admission.

"I'm fine with you, I'm comfortable and it's something that does not happen to me often, I can be myself, and this is a new situation for me, Michiru." The other did not know what to answer to that total stripped of Tenou's feelings.

"But at the same time, during the therapy, I realized that you were not immune, you were fond of it and I was sucking you, like all the others, so I had to get away from you."

Michiru remained silent for a long moment. "It's true," she said. "Attract those close to you, for your appearance, of course, but also for that way of doing 'I do not care what happens around me.' There are people in here who would sell the soul to the devil to know what goes inside that head when you're all absorbed, lost in your thoughts. " 'And I'm one of those', she found herself thinking.

Haruka looked distressed. "Do not help me if you say that."

"Then hope you will never find yourself in the nurses' room." The other looked at her in surprise, then smiled. Michiru resumed talking.

"Your charisma, your having ascendancy over others It is your being Haruka, not a punishment, nor is your appearance." "Those around me die, Michiru, how should I interpret it?"

"Like the extreme context in which you have lived so far." The doctor replied, but the other shook her head.

"Well, my mother did not live in an extreme context."

"You did not have power over your illness, you could not do anything about it." Tenou did not answer, and Michiru let her think. "The fact that you came here instead, how should I interpret it?" She asked her then.

"I told you, I'm sorry for how I behaved." The girl read sincere repentance in the words of Tenou. "I will not ask you anything more, on the subject." To hurt you made me worse off than I thought. "

Michiru smiled at her. "And I'm really grateful, Haruka."

Then she approached her. "So you will let me gravitate around you, will you let me continue to grow fond of you?" She looked at her sideways.

"I'd rather you do not, but I certainly can not stop you." Much to her surprise, Michiru hugged her, placing her head on her shoulder. The girl felt the other not respond to the embrace, and indeed had the doubt that Haruka had even stopped breathing. "Inspire, Exhale." Joked Michiru, without breaking her embrace.

"You're afraid of this, Haruka, you're scared because you no longer know what it is to relate to people in a situation easy and normal. "She raised her head, looking for her gaze.

" We turn the black hole into a supernova, Major Tenou. "She said to her gently, and a slight smile bent her lips to the other.

"The more I hurt you, the more you want to be my friend, and then I'm crazy."

"Well, what can I tell you? In my opinion, you'd better be my friend."

"Ah, seriously?" Tenou replied ironically, and Michiru nodded, literally freeing her from the hug and taking a step away.

"Yes, because I have something that everyone wants, but I do not give to anyone." Haruka bowed her head, taunted by the blatant double meaning.

"And it would be?" She saw Michiru carry a hand in her pocket, extracting a colored key.

"The key to the Playstation Room, in Orthopedics." Tenou did not answer immediately, looking at her in the slightest. Then she laughed.

"You know, I do not think Foster wants the key to the Playstation Hall from you."

"But I think you're a bit 'too naughty."

"What were you thinking, huh? "

Haruka shook her head, and to Michiru's surprise she approached her until she invaded her personal space.

She stretched out her hands, resting her palms on the wall, on the sides of the other's face: now Michiru was imprisoned by the body and the arms of Haruka, who stood in front of her. But she did not feel uncomfortable.

Rather... Tenou leaned toward her.

"Michiru, Michiru, you're joking with fire, knowing that you're doing it."

"Interesting." She murmured in an extremely low voice, looking for her gaze.

"But what will you do if the fire decides to burn you?"

"Test me, do not you?" She challenged her, raising her chin. Tenou did not have to repeat it twice, and bent over the doctor's lips.

Michiru's eyes widened, surprised. She could not react, or even concretely realize that action. She felt only the warm breath of Haruka a few millimeters from her mouth, and her heart beat so hard that she was afraid to splash out of her ribcage.

The other stopped, without breaking eye contact.

"What is hidden under this angel's face, doc?" She then murmured, without moving, the emerald gaze of an unbearable intensity. Then, after an interminable instant, Haruka detached herself from the wall, shaking her head.

"I can not destroy you too." She turned away from her and without another word came out, leaving Michiru dismayed. But above all, confused.

x

 **Author's notes: ok, I did it today too! Hope you'll like this chap, here something more about the relationship HXM, and a small space about Michiru's past. Step by step we are coming closer to the truth about their past! Wait and read to find out! Until next time!**

 **Milla23;)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Enjoy it!**

 **Frangar, non flectar**

 _Medical Hospital "Edward Dewenish VA Medical Centre"_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _15 May_

 _2008_

The pencil ran quickly on the paper sheet painting the shapes of the figures sit on a bench in front of her.

She memorised their positions and their movements painting first just the shapes then she would have make them better. She also printed some trees and bunches near the bench and then went back on the figures.

"What are you doing?"

A warm breath said in her ear, and Michiru jumped because of the sudden apparition.

"Haruka! Tell the truth you wanna kill me?!" She said when she turned around and, crossing those green eyes, she read in them a hint of pure enjoyment, a childish one.

"I'm sorry. I couldn't resist." Said the other one putting her hands in her jeans pockets. "You were a prey too easy and I was also _curious."_ She added sitting near to the doctor. _Near_ , but _not too much._

She took Michiru's sheets in her hand and she started looking at them, seeing there were others paintings. "So, you are even _an artist,_ beside a _musician."_

Michiru smiled and took back her sheets. "I had to kill time until _someone_ didn't finish its physiotherapist meeting."

"This is more than killing the time."

Commented Haruka, taking the folder from her hands and starting to flip through the sheets. Michiru let her do it without opposing, but inside she thanked the sky that she had decided to leave home the many sketchy sketches of the same night when, with the adrenaline of a thousand and after trying them all to be able to sleep, she had decided to channel that emotional tsunami into one of her arts. And since starting to play the violin would have been nothing short of inappropriate at three o'clock in the morning, the block of sketches was filled with long-limbed figures with intense emerald eyes. The words, but especially the gesture of Haruka, the day before, had left her disconcerted. Not only because that had opened as never happened, except for the moment at the piano, but also for her reaction to that game - had no other word to describe it - with which Tenou had put it to the test.

She, for sure, had shown her that she was not afraid to burn, even if she had the full confirmation of what Haruka had revealed to her: certainly the magnetism of the other could crash it. But do not bend it.

 _Frangar, not flectar_ , mentally told herself. And yet, having removed the strictly competitive component between them, how could one explain that subtle thrill of pleasure when she had believed that Tenou wanted to kiss her? That not to try to reject it, when she had imprisoned it against the wall with her body? What was really a well-crafted tactic that was shaking her sexuality? The voice of Tenou rescued her from that swarm of ruminations, which would then remain unanswered.

"As?"

"I asked you if there is-something-that-you do not know-do."

Chanted Haruka, as if talking to a mentally ill person.

"Sure-it-is." It was so slowly Michiru, removing her sketches from the hands of the other.

"I can not make myself respected by a certain person, who can influence me more than I would like." A smile was painted on Haruka's face.

"This hypothetical person has all my esteem." It was solemn, and Michiru sighed.

"You know, it's enough that this person always does two little things and lo and I can not deny anything."

Michiru could clearly see Tenou's ego bulge out of all proportion. And when she was sure that the other was convinced of her triumph, she rose from the bench, folder in hand, and hit her down.

"You know, that isn't you."

Haruka's smile suddenly disappeared.

"Ah no ?"

"No."

The doctor started waking toward the entrance of the hospital and soon she found Haruka near her.

"And who would that be?"

Michiru laughed. "It's true then the curiosity is _female."_

"You aren't funny." Said the other one hit, wounded in the proud.

They reached the hospital walking towards the lifts.

"By the way, you were talking about _me."_ Haruka said after a moment of silence. Michiru shake her head, the last word had to be hers.

They were distracted by a quick step behind them, and they both turned to see Dr. Chiba approach them, bag in hand, the jacket still wearing and the sunglasses to cover their cobalt eyes."Ehy Michiru, Major Tenou." Greeted her the one, placing the glasses on his head and in turn waiting for the elevator."You ... are you coming now?" Michiru asked surprised, glancing at the clock, and the man sighed.

"Usako did not hear the alarm, so there was an escalation of delays and so I had to accompany Chibiusa in kindergarten." Michiru smiled, thinking of what was typical of Usagi.The sliding doors opened, and the unusual trio entered the elevator: Haruka leaned on the right corner, hands in pockets and legs crossed, while Michiru stood on the left side, ending up leaving Mamoru in the middle.

"Guess you started again your therapy." Said him pushing the key of their floor.

"We already got over our misunderstandings. True Haruka?"

"Of course." Smiled Haruka. Mamoru looked at them surprised. Then he shake his head.

"I can't follow you, _I really can't_. One day you go of love and agree, the day after you avoid each other-"

"You see doctor Chiba," started Haruka then looked at Michiru "May I tell to him?" Asked "May I tell him what happened?"

The doctor was actually surprised about the sudden request of a _licence,_ as well as Haruka's sudden need to share such a personal speech as that of twenty-four hours earlier with Mamoru who, after all, did not know much; but he shrugged. "If you feel sure of that."

"It's ok, that's _because of your insistence_." On the serious features appeared a funny one. "The problem is that Michiru and me had _sex,_ and I didn't call her the day after and she was disappointed."

Michiru saw Mamoru's eyes grow huge, and she thought that if that was the scene of a cartoon, Chiba's pupils would splash out of their sockets. Although, of course, her should not be less: in light of the facts of the previous day, certainly now had trouble understanding where Tenou crossed the _boundary of joke._

 _"Ah-ah"_ said Michiru, trying not to blush. _Frangar, non flectar_ she repeated herself mentally.

"In which of your dreams, exactly?"

"In the one where we did some numbers that you do not ever imag-"

"Ok I got it." Mamoru said putting a hand in front of her face. "I don't think I'd like to listen to the details."

Haruka tried to kill a laugh while Michiru smiled to her friend. "Don't mind her Mamoru. Haruka is just a big _chatterbox."_ Said sighing.

"Oh oh, instead you to the chatter surely prefer the _facts._ But I can't blame you, I know I can be a great amateur."

Michiru laughed. "The curiosity is surely _female,_ but the _modesty_ is surely _androgynous._ And about what I know it has name and surname."

Mamoru listened to that dribble of jokes, shifting his gaze alternately from one to the other. And when the elevator doors opened, he coughed out.

"Well, certainly better like that than with long faces." He commented when those approached him, before his attention was captured by a couple of interiors that required immediate consultation: the absence of Chiba had aroused a bit 'all the department.They watched him walk away into the corridor, and since Haruka was still trying to stifle the laughter, Michiru turned to look at her.

"Stop that, how old are you? Two?"

"It's stronger than me. I just found a new hobbie: _to piss you off._ "

Michiru rolled her yes.

"Anyway, you know they say: _barking dog does not bite."_ And in her office she has the confirmation.

"Let me understand, _you wanna be bit_ , doc?"

"You won't do that. You would run away like you did yesterday."

"That was an innocent game, _Michiru."_

 _Of course, a dream which didn't make me sleep the whole night_

Thought Michiru.

A cough claimed their attentions, breaking the crossing of blue and green gazes.

"When you say you have timing, Dr. Foster." Haruka was ironic, and the other tried to mask his obvious hostility with a smile.

"As a good former quarterback, I can understand exactly when it is time to intervene in the dynamics of the game." That did not answer, an idea that was beginning to form in the head: if Kaioh wanted to be funny, she would have pushed it directly into the lion's jaws.

"Haruka, how about waiting for me in my office?" Michiru intervened,

"I'll be right there."

"No problem." She winked at her.

"Come on, it's your chance." She added, lowering her voice, but letting Foster understand perfectly.

Michiru looked at her, and Haruka exasperated a surprised expression.

"How, a second ago you told me that you hoped Doctor Foster would invite you out ..."

If she could, Michiru would have taken her by the neck and tightened until it rattled her pity.

She looked at her very serious slapping face, while Samuel tilted his head to one side.

"You certainly never made me understand it, Michiru."

"Oh, you know how women are made, doctor." Haruka said, and if she were in a different situation, Michiru would have laughed at the paradox between the sentence and the one who had spoken it. But then Tenou's hand hit the girl's ass with a noisy 'slap', and the doctor jumped straight up into Foster's arms, who welcomed him more than willingly: every trace of irony disappeared from Michiru's thoughts, while she watched Haruka move away towards her office: she was baffled, to say the least.

 _What an idiot!_

"Major Tenou !!" Called Samuel, intent on defending Kaioh's honor.

"How do you allow it?" But Haruka turned slightly and moved a hand.

"You'll thank me later, Doctor." Once you reach the goal, if you understand what I mean, like a good former quarterback..."

With a last glance at Michiru's bruised face, she disappeared where the corridor made a corner.

And the girl was left to accept Dr. Samuel Foster's dinner invitation on Friday.

x

 _Military Hospital "Edward Dewenish VA Medical Centre"_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _17 May, 2008_

 _Day 28_

Michiru watched the score, holding the pen between her lips, and Haruka was always uncomfortable whenever the doctor made the gesture. After a careful examination, the girl erased two notes and replaced them with as many of a semi-major tone.

"Try like this."Haruka put her hands on the piano keys, and resumed the melody from the previous line: when she arrived at the point where they had made the correction, she smiled satisfied, and continued that cheerful moderate.

"In fact it's much better." She told her when she broke off, and Michiru smiled at her too.

"Where did you take those scores on the piano?" Asked then, jerking up all the sheets on a near chair.

"Do not tell me _you_ wrote them all."

The doctor shook her head, amused by the note of disbelief of the other.

"No, I borrowed them." Haruka frowned, looking at her, but Michiru did not tell her that if she had them brought to her by the Master with whom she would duet in the memorial for the Memorial Day, two weeks later, she was teaching piano at the conservatory.

The exhibition was still a mystery to Tenou, and Michiru wanted it to remain so: she was willing to give her the invitation only a couple of days before, trying so, for once, to surprise her.

The doctor stood up and went to the cello, pinching the strings thoughtfully, feeling the look of the other on her.

"Can you play it?" Michiru shrugged.

"I studied it a little at the conservatory, but the violin is my main instrument."

"Sin, I always found the cellists extremely sexy." Haruka smiled, and the other tilted her head.

"How many cellists would you meet, let's hear."

"More than you imagine." That was cryptic, and after a long moment of silence a slight laugh came out of her lips. Michiru raised her eyebrows. "Thing." Tenou composed herself, shaking her head. But the smile came back to overpowering her face, and the doctor folded her arms across his chest.

"Haruka, what?" Churches nervous, and she gestured with her hand.

"Anything." But Michiru knew very well what tickled the other's thoughts.

"And that I was thinking of _Foster_." She said then, laughing again, and the doctor snapped her lips to express her disappointment. Bingo, she thought.

"I believe that there is not one person in the hospital who does not know that you will go out with him, only that he goes on television like the President, to communicate it to the Nation."

"And whose merit, in your opinion?" Haruka tried again to make the laughter die.

"You had to see your face when I pushed you on him."

"Here, in this regard." She strode closer and gave her a small slap.

"Ow!" It was the other, surprised but still amused, and Michiru put her hands on her hips, leaning towards her.

"This is for touching my ass." "What a tragedy." Haruka dripped irony. "You mine can touch it whenever you want."

"I do not care, thank you." And that said, she collected the scores and put them in a folder.

"We have to go," she told her after a look at the clock.

"We had the room until three, and we have already gone in. And then there is the recovery of yesterday's therapy." Haruka stood up, a trail of a smile still bending her lips as she stretched her long arms.

"How come you did not come?"

"Some logistical problems." She answered her with that same cryptic air that was so dear to the other. When at lunchtime she had driven to Norfolk, she had learned that Jenny had a fever; at four o'clock, therefore, she had to return to take Hotaru in kindergarten. After all, however, she was not at all sorry to take that day off. They arrived in Room 4, and from the large window the glimpse of the sun-bathed Portsmouth Bay opened to them. Haruka approached the glass, shielding herself from the reverberation with her hand.

"Even from the house I bought, you can see the bay so well." Michiru sat down, crossing her legs.

"How did you end up living here in Portsmouth, from Washington?" Tenou did not answer immediately, as always; then she turned to look at her.

"It would have made no sense to go back there, and I needed to get away from the suffocating shadow of the General, to find my space: that was where I lived with my parents, soaked with memories of the last period - if not of happiness, at least serenity, before my mother's illness and death. "

Tenou sat down opposite Michiru, who listened without interfering. Even if the way the other had referred to her father had not escaped her.

"In the house in Washington, a Haruka lived that no longer exists."

"But why right Portsmouth?"

A sly smile played on Haruka's lips.

"Because my mother was from here."

Michiru didn't hide her surprise, while she laid her face on her hand. "Really?"

Haruka nodded. "You see, after West Point I've been a little time in the USA.

"And in the rare periods of license granted to me, it was enough for me to lean on some barracks, or to reserve a hotel room. Or pass- "She did not utter the last option." Let's leave it alone, "she murmured, and Michiru did not inquire." Then in 2006 there was a longer license than usual, and I began to think about taking a home. A place that I could feel mine. Any place would have been better than Washington, and Portsmouth flashed through my mind. I moved the residence here, and bought a small apartment in a Bay Street residential complex. "

"Near the marina," agreed Michiru, mentally locating the area. Tenou sighed.

"I lived there just a couple of weeks, then I left, and I never came back."

"Since 2006 do not you put foot in your house?"

"I can not really call it that, Michiru, and I'm afraid I'll never be able to feel at home, outside ..." she paused.

"Outside of Iraq." She said after a long silence. Michiru looked at her for several moments, then smiled at her.

"It will take time, but we will succeed, Haruka. "A leaf in the wind will no longer find its tree." She told her melodramatically, but a note of sadness in her voice told the doctor that Tenou really believed her.

"But let me tell you, you're not a leaf lost in the wind at all." Tenou inclined her head. "And what would I be, in your opinion?" Michiru thought for a moment about the peculiarities of the girl sitting in front of her, then a smile was painted on her face.

"You are _the wind_ , Haruka."

x

 _Military Hospital "Edward Dewenish VA Medical Centre"_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _19 May, 2008_

 _Day 30_

 _The water was beating on every part of her body, weighing down her sweat suit in West Point. The mud moved away and approached from her face with every bending of her arms, while she bit her lips to avoid answering his superior, standing next to her, he was punctuating with numbers the progress of the bending. "Twenty-five more, Tenou!" Sergeant Lloyd shouted into her ears, crouching down._

 _"So we'll see if you still want to be arrogant with me."_

 _" 'Fuck." It was his tight-lipped answer, but he heard it._

 _"As you said?" He shouted to overpower the sound of the rain._

 _"What do you want to do with another thirty?" He groaned, cursing his idiocy, as he felt Lloyd's gaze on her, who had begun to turn around her._

 _"I'll be your worst nightmare, because I'm fucking your daddy!" He told her, throwing mud in her face with the amphibian._

 _"At any hour of the day, and of the night, I will come and get you and I will submit you to the most exhausting tests, until I will bend you until you break, Tenou." He continued to overthrow them with threats and insults, until he collapsed in the last bending, worn by the pains in the muscles of her arms and chest. "Standing, soldier!" Lloyd ordered, and not without effort rose up, then stood at attention: the limbs trembled from the effort._

 _"You can go, Tenou, but I would not sleep if I were you."_

"Down from the cot, Tenou!" Haruka opened her eyes wide and jumped up, finding herself in a moment at attention beside her bed. But she soon realized that this was not her room at West Point, and it was not Sergeant Lloyd who shouted the order. Michiru raised an eyebrow, and looked at her with great admiration.

"Wow, is that what you teach at the military academy?" She then asked, sitting down.

"I take a life to get up." Haruka dropped onto the bed, and put her head in her hands.

"Jesus Christ, Doc. Do you want to make me a heart attack?"

"You deserve it." She scolded the other, and she snorted.

"How long will you reproach me?"

"For all that Samuel will feel encouraged to invite me out, believing that I'm attracted to him." Haruka smiled.

"How you're biased, I'll bet you'll thank me after tonight."

"Not even in a million years." The girl made to slip under the sheets, but Michiru was quick to get up and grab her wrists.

"What are you doing, are you going to sleep?"

"Are you leaving?" The other snorted, exasperated. "I am sleepy!"

"Do you know what day it is today?" Tenou returned to a sitting position, and her shoulder was rubbed and her face was that too.

"Apart from the day of your date?" "Exactly." "Enlighten me." Michiru sat on the bed next to her.

"It's May 19th." That spread her arms. "IS...?"

"And today is a month that we know each other." The other did not make a fold.

"I still do not understand the reason for all this enthusiasm."

"Because you behaved well." Michiru explained to her.

"You've been rather collaborative, even from the point of view of musical psychotherapy, and considering how you were a month ago, I can say that your behavior is no longer considered socially dangerous."

"Yuu-uh." Haruka said flatly, waving her fist in the air. Michiru smiled.

"I'm saying you can go home, Haruka."

"Mamoru agrees with me, today we'll sign the discharge sheets.

"Forty days of hospitalization are more than enough." Tenou remained thoughtful.

"Chiba agrees?" She then asked, as if zhe had made that statement only at that moment. Michiru nodded.

"He was a little perplexed in the light of your mirror quarrel, about ten days ago, but I explained to him that I know the motivations behind that gesture, and that it was an unconscious, and therefore isolated action." Haruka looked at her, but said nothing. "Obviously the end of the hospitalization does not mean the end of therapy." The doctor added. "You'll have to keep coming every day for psychoanalysis, and taking your medications." Tenou just nodded.

"I would also like to talk to you about another matter." Michiru said after a long silence, approaching a little and noticing how her movement Haruka had adjusted her posture, moving away.

"At the moment you are on temporary leave from military service, but for cases of Post Traumatic Disorder, the procedure involves submitting a request for permanent leave." The other looked at her without emotion.

"Permanent leave ..." she repeated then.

"It means that if I am reformed I will not be able to leave anymore, is it so?"

"If it will be accepted, yes." A bitter smile bent her lips upward.

"Your ingenuity is almost tender, doc." He told her. "You already know that it will never be accepted, will you?"

"This is not about changing 'F' into 'M', Haruka." She had thought about it, and he had also thought that General Tenou could intervene in this choice. "Here we are talking about medical records that talk about an extremely delicate psychic condition very delicated.

"Here we are talking about medical records that talk about an extremely delicate psychic condition, and about a medical staff that certifies it: your father should bribe all the Dewenish, to reject it."Haruka became serious. "I would not joke it too much."Michiru tilted her head, then patted her covered sheet.

"Come on, get dressed, I'll wait for you in my office, to sign the resignation." She got out of bed and took the door, glancing at Haruka who had been sitting on the bed and now staring at an undefined point in the ceiling, her head toppled backwards. As she used to do, Michiru had learned, when she reflected, hiding from _something_.

x

"Seriously, it was not necessary, I could have taken a taxi." Michiru put the arrow and slowed, waiting for the right moment to cross the road and slip into the gate that led to the private parking of an elegant condominium in Port Bay.

"Stop it, just imagine if I made you go home alone, and then I told you, I was glad to go with you." Haruka grunted something as she pushed the Ray Ban toward her forehead, sinking even further into the seat of Kaioh's Lexus RX400. Once in the private area, the SUV parked near the front door. "Anyway, nice car."

"Thank you." Michiru answered in a smile. "Do you like cars?" A slight smile was painted on Haruka's face. "A bit'." It was her only answer, coming down.

"Good for you, I do not understand anything about it instead."

"Women and engines ..." She began ironically, but the other interrupted her. "Women and engines a cabbage, you're a woman as much as me." Michiru scolded her piqued, provoking the girl's laughter. Haruka took the bag with her personal effects from the back seat and put it on her shoulder, and Michiru approached her after a quick blink of the four arrows signaled the closing of the car and the activation of the alarm. She watched her, dressed in a white shirt and the usual jeans, taking a firm step toward the entrance. And she could not help thinking how much they gave her sunglasses, making her more charming than usual. As if she needed it, she thought. The door was closed, of course, and Haruka glanced at the push-button panel to the side.

"Shit." She said touching herself. Then she turned to Michiru. "It takes either the code or the key."

"And I bet you do not have either one, right?"

"Of course, who did you take me for?" She joked Haruka, and the other smiled. Then she dropped the bag and took off her glasses, hanging them on the first button of her shirt; scratching the back of her head, she forced herself to remember. But the intercom placed under the keyboard crackled, and a voice intervened to get them out of that impasse: Michiru speculated that beyond the mirrored glass, which now reflected their image by not seeing the inside, there was the goalkeeper of the building that he must have observed their approaches. ' _Good morning. Would you? '_

"We want to come in. I live here." Haruka announced, knocking on the glass, having accomplished the same reasoning as Michiru. ' _Can you tell me your name, please? So I can check. "_

"Major Tenou Haruka." ' _Wait a moment_ '. From the intercom came three long 'Beep' that silenced the voice of the goalkeeper. Haruka sighed. "And let's wait ..." Michiru watched her slip her hands into the back pockets of her jeans, and thought about how she was wearing her heels, she was taller than she was about half her head. "How tall are you, Haruka?" The question came out without thinking, and the other looked at her in amazement.

"Sic feet, centimeter plus, centimeter less." She remained thoughtful for a moment.

"It could not be otherwise, since the General is almost seven feet."

"No. She was about the same as you." Haruka leaned her head against the glass, trying in vain to peek into the hall.

"But how long does it take, that idiot?" She stopped when she felt Michiru's fingers touch a lock that fell next to her eye, and then take it in her hands.

"Your hair is getting longer ..." she told her absorbed, almost as if it were a personal consideration.

"Michiru." She called her attention, even if she really did not want to. She had understood that this was the girl's way of doing things, and she could not do anything about it. But she could not even let the other take too much freedom. That was collected, leaving the lock immediately. "Sorry."

"It 'does not matter."

' _Major Tenou_?' The intercom resumed croaking. ' _Forgive the wait, I had to make some calls. I open them immediately_. '. The door opened in a 'clack', and Michiru waited until Haruka took the bag before entering.

"I'll fix them as soon as I have time, and a pair of scissors." She heard the doctor say as they approached the porter's lodge, realizing that his observation had not only aroused hostility. A boy in a shirt and a tie went to meet them.

"Major Tenou, must apologize, but try to understand me: I've been working here for a year and a half and I've never seen it before."

"Excuse me, can I have my keys now?"

"Sure!" He spilled her another.

"Follow me, please, I have several things for you."

"I'll wait here." Michiru told her, starting to look around. The place was really nice, and certainly elegant. The floor was in white marble, and black and white lithographs hung on the walls. To the left of the porter's lodge were the stairs, while to the right was the sliding elevator door: from the numbers above that, Michiru understood that the condominium - which, to be honest, looked like a luxury hotel - had twelve floors.

"But you treat yourself well." She said to Haruka when she saw her return to her, holding a yellow paper envelope over the keys. The other shrugged.

"When I do something, I do it well."

Inside the elevator, Tenou pushed the key on which the number '12' stood, and the silence accompanied the short climb. When the landing opened to their sight, Michiru saw a large space, and a single entrance door.

"Is there only your apartment up here?" Haruka nodded.

"I told you, _I'm not Miss Company_." She turned all the door open and pushed open the armored door: the smell of the closed invested in full, while the gaze was lost in the dark. Michiru waited for Haruka to take a step, but that did not move in the doorway; then she put her hand on her back.

"It's all right." She murmured.

"Is it your house."

"It's strange."

"I know, but you'll get used to it. She exerted a slight pressure, and Haruka decided to enter. She dropped the bag, and headed for where she remembered there must have been a window: she pressed a button and the blind began to rise, letting the light flood the house. Michiru saw a large living room, almost empty, except for something piled up in the middle and covered with semitransparent plastic sheeting. She felt fresh air tickling her neck, and sensed that the other had opened the shutters. She continued to look around: Haruka stood in a large space devoid of any furniture, and behind her opened a room that Michiru could see through the door left wide open, and that he recognized as the kitchen. At the height of the cadastre of furniture there was another door, which he thought should give in the night of the house. Michiru could not avoid making comparisons, and considered that only entry and stay were as big as her apartment. Haruka strode over the distance separating her from the other window, and repeated the operation with the first one. "Good." Michiru burst out, unbuttoning her trench coat and bringing her hands to her hips, when the room was fully illuminated. "Where do we start?"

"Nowhere." Haruka dismounted her.

"Here we have to settle down, I have to clean and paint, first of all."

"And then you need furniture, but a bed, at least, do you have it?" A grin was printed on the face of that.

"Mmh, right away to the _hard_ doc, uh?" "Who's having an appointment tonight?" Haruka shrugged.

"Touché." Michiru smiled.

"Okay, we'll face the home factor when the time comes. Did you pick up your medicine from the hospital pharmacy?"

"Yes mom."

"Now you need a phone, are we going to buy it?"

"Go easy, doc, or you will be overloaded." Haruka's lips bent upward.

"I have to send all my bank documents, I have no money, I can not do anything for today." The doctor approached her.

"It will mean that I will give you a gift."

"Is not it against professional ethics?" Haruka asked ironically, before putting her hands on her shoulders.

"Listen, Michiru, you were incredibly kind today, but now I'd like to be alone." Michiru understood that this was a way, not even very veiled, to put her at the door.

"I need to recalibrate myself to this new situation." The other nodded.

"All right," she said then, trying to mask a certain disappointment. Then she rummaged in her bag, pulling out a diary and a pen, and starting to write something. "In any case, this is my number." She handed her the piece of paper she had torn, and Tenou smiled.

"Call me if you have any problem - day, night, when you want, okay?"

"Even if I had to feel so alone in my cold and empty bed?" Michiru rolled her eyes. "For that there are the video stores for adults." Haruka smiled.

"I met people who would have killed to know these figures." She communicated it waving the piece of paper.

"Then let's make this our little secret." Michiru approached the door.

"Michiru." When she turned around, Tenou was in front of her.

"Thanks for everything." The girl stroked her face. _This and more_ , she thought, but she did not let those words descend from her mind to her lips.

x

She looked at the phone for the umpteenth time, while the lights of the city flowed past the window of Samuel's Jeep. No call, neither by Jenny, nor anyone else.

"Are you all right, Michiru?" Samuel asked, loosening his tie a little and unbuttoning the vest he wore over his shirt, looking for the girl's gaze.

"You seemed distracted all evening." Michiru smiled at him, and thought it was very true, but she certainly could not tell him.

"I was thinking of Hotaru, that's all ... I'm always sorry to leave her with the baby sitter in the evening." Samuel smiled.

"She must be a fantastic child."

"She is," she murmured softly, thinking of her angel. She saw the familiar shape of the condominium in which she lived, and Samuel slowed down to enter the private area. They had not found traffic, coming back from Virginia Beach, and it took a little less than twenty minutes to return to Portsmouth; they had dinner at Bella Italia, the restaurant where Rebecca worked, which had been full of care for the whole evening, even making a couple of more bottles of wine arrive at one point. At the expense of the restaurant.

"It was a nice evening." Samuel told her, when the car was stationary.

"I would like to repeat it." Michiru remained silent.

"Samuel ..." she began, willing to tell him that she was not there, and never would have been, space for him in his life; but that leaned forward, kissing her. Taken by surprise, she did not react immediately. And that gesture led her to reflect: she thought about how many upheavals she had suffered her existence in that last month and, above all, in general; to the solitude he had chosen and which on some days became unbearable. How Foster had always died behind her, and how easy and convenient it would be to let herself go into Samuel's arms. It would have been enough so little, to definitely do it fall. And she would have someone close to her, even for Hotaru ... But when she felt the boy's tongue brush her lips, asking permission to explore her mouth, and at that very instant in her eyes Samuel's short hair became blonde, Michiru put her hands on the other's chest, and pushed him Street. "Samuel, no."

"Why not?" He asked with a tone that Michiru could not define but frustrated.

"I can not ... I'm sorry."

"You have to start thinking a little bit about you too." He told her, hard. But she shook her head.

"I can not let anyone in my life come in, Samuel, because it would also mean entering into Hotaru's life, and I can not allow him to become attached to someone of whom-" she paused, searching for the right words.

"Of which I'm not sure."

"But sooner or later you will have to do it, Michiru."

"I know, but not now, I do not feel like it." Michiru reached out to caress the shaven face of the other, his gray eyes full of resignation.

"You are a wonderful person, you deserve something better." He turned and kissed her hands.

"I will not give up easily. But she shook her head.

"I do not want to hurt you any more than I've probably already done." She withdrew her hand, and without saying anything else got out of the car and went towards the entrance to the condominium. She passed the card on the magnetic reader and the sliding doors opened, allowing them to quickly reach the elevator. Once inside, she slid down the wall until she sat on the floor, oblivious to the cream-colored dress she wore, while the elevator went up to the chosen floor. In the silence, she touched her lips: Samuel's kiss had left her nothing. An absolute nothing compared to the overload of emotions that a non-kiss had given her, a few days before. And thinking of that, she trembled at the image that had formed in her mind when another face had been superimposed on Foster's face: of features, typology, but above all different sexes. She understood at that moment that her efforts would have been in vain. Which, like Don Quixote, was a fight against windmills. " _You're bending me, Haruka_." She murmured, as the elevator doors reopened on her usual life.

 **Author's notes: ok, I'm sorry for the little late, but I have been very busy those days!**

 **But here we are, chapter 8! FRANGAR, NON FLECTAR is a latin phrase and means to break not to fold, or something like that ;X**

 **More about HXM relationship, I laughed a lot writing this chapter, hope you too liked this one. Until next time this is Milla23 ;)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Enjoy it!**

 **Nicknames**

 _Operation "Iraqi Freedom"_

 _4th infantry Division Headquarter,_

 _Tikrit,_

 _Iraq,_

 _2007_

Haruka was on the step above impatient, sitting on the military jeep driver's seat. Puffing she got out from the vehicle, covering the distance that separated the exit of the camp from the tent into which the simple soldier Richard Banks had disappeared more than ten minutes ago.

"Banks, do you still have it for long?" She asked getting in the building, just to see the guy taking something from his rucksack.

"No, I'm done Major!" He answered her jerking up and putting the rucksack on his shoulder.

"What are you doing?"

"I bought some candies." Richard said smiling, and Haruka shook her head, getting on her jeep.

"What do you think you can do for them bringing them candies?"

The guy just struggled. "They are babies, Major. Babies who live in a terrible situation. I know it doesn't help at all, yet even the thought of bringing them an happy moment in their lives is very important to me."

Haruka didn't answer. That was just a _palliative_ , giving them candy when they had nothing else. And to allow children, some of them very young, to become attached to someone who did not belong to that world, that maybe in a few months would have returned to their home, from their family, was something that could not be shared. But Richard seemed enthusiastic every time he went to the set of tensile structures that was the reception center for orphan children in Tikrit, run by several associations under the direct control of Unicef: there they were given the opportunity to play and above all study, waiting for the future to light up a bit.

He knew that Richard loved children, but he was not so sure that all that enthusiasm came only from the kids.

"Major, have I ever told you about my nephew-"

"Just a _thousand_ time." Haruka stopped him: Banks literally loved his two-year-old niece, daughter of his sister, who kept a sample of photographs near the cot. But hearing about it once again telling the adventures could become a real attack on her nervous system. Richard laughed, knowing full well how long he might be in some situations, then he sighed.

"My sister is pregnant."

Haruka stopped looking ahead her as she turned to the guy beside her.

"I was sent the letter, with an ultrasound. She is going to give birth in January."

"Best wishes." Haruka genuinely said and the other one smiled. A bitter smile.

"Sometimes I'm afraid I will never have my own family, Major. Something beautiful, as Susan is doing. Or as my mother and father did."

"It's not said that family is a synonymous of _beauty."_

Richard looked at her, titling his head.

"When you say like that I'm afraid of asking about your family."

"Don't ask then, and we all are happy."

Said Haruka, in a flat tune.

Banks did not investigate further, knowing full well how heavy the surname the other wore was. He was not interested in it, but for someone - like several of his comrades - General Tenou was an authentic myth. Evidently, being the daughter should not be so mythical: after all, which father with a shred of sensitivity would have forced the only daughter to hide her identity, to embark on a career, albeit brilliant, in the army?Silence fell on them, and everyone lost their thoughts for most of the journey. Until a realization hit Richard, and he felt the need to externalize it to his superior.

"You know Major, I'd like to have a baby." Said looking at her.

Haruka did not make a turn, but when she noticed from the corner of her eye that Banks stared at her, she slowed slightly and turned to the boy.

"Well? You want to have it with _me?"_

He understood the giant gaffe he had just made and blushed furiously. "What did you understand?! No!!!"

"Then stop staring at me."

"It's you and me, whom should I stare at?"

"You can't stare at me when you say you _want to have a child."_ Said Haruka, and Richard crossed his arm on his chest; jerking his chin, a false offensive face.

"It was a personal consideration I was sharing with you. You should feel honoured."

"Of course _I am_ , is it evident enough?" Tenou couldn't mask her irony, while she smiled.

"And me Who wanted to invite you at the baptism in New York, to introduce you to my family."

Haruka did not answer, as she saw in the distance the outline of the ' _Oasis_ ' tensile structures, as was called in the code between their departments.

"Why did she come too today?" Asked Banks understanding that for today he won't receive any

' _Thanks for the invitation I'll surely come.'_

I have to talk to the 'Oasis' responsible, about a project I have in my mind."

Richard smiled.

"Samira will be happy to see you, she always asks me about you." Again, no answer. Richard sighed, accepting the defeat by letting himself fall on the back of the jeep, and they crossed that last short stretch of road without speaking. Haruka stopped the vehicle not far from one of the larger structures, attracting the attention of some children playing football: those ran to meet them, and shortly after others came out of the same tent towards which the two soldiers were heading, attracted by clamor of the first. Nearly everyone surrounded Banks, who was laughing and calling for calm and had started to put his hands inside the backpack, pulling out handfuls of fruit candy. Haruka watched the amused scene, her arms crossed over her chest, and realized why Richard had so much fun: he himself was a great baby. She did not immediately notice the small group of daredevils who had approached her. She realized it only when a little hand pulled her by the edge of the camouflage jacket, and found herself looking into two dark eyes, in a round face framed by a small chador.

"He's the good one, he's got candy." She said seriously, pointing to Banks. She did not know how to handle children, much less how to behave in their presence, ending up being uncomfortable. But the baby - and the other two kids who were with her - seemed more interested in ... Haruka smiled, understanding what had caught their attention. She pulled the bar of her Ray Ban out of her pocket and, after opening them, put them to the child: they were huge and extremely funny, but on her face a smile was so disarmingly drawn that Haruka could not help but laugh. She stroked her head, then started toward the tensile structure, leaving Banks at the mercy of the little monsters. And for a moment she understood what the boy meant, when he told her in the jeep how he felt about giving even a moment of comfort to those children. She crossed the large tent, where some volunteers were arranging several boxes, and going through a covered passage reached another, smaller one.

"May I come in?" She announced herself, opening a flap, and when her interlocutor saw her, a smile lits up her face.

"Hello, Colleen."

Colleen McKenzie, the coordinator of the Oasis, got up from her desk to meet them. "This is a surprise!" She told her without hiding her enthusiasm, holding out her hand. Then she remained thoughtful for a moment, and raised her arms.

"Oh, fuck the label, come here!" Haruka nearly choked when the woman hugged her, and held back a laugh.

"It's nice to see you again, Colleen."

"Jesus, Major, you are always a charm." She told her, loosening her embrace, looking at her from head to toe. Then she shook her head.

"Stop Colleen, he could be your son." Haruka smiled, tilting her head: she looked at the rather long-limbed physique of the other - despite having just passed her fifties, her tanned legs and arms left uncovered by a pair of brown shorts and a military green tank top.

"Well, look at you, you always look like a little girl." The woman moved her long, blonde hair, streaked with white, like a diva. "You know what women want to hear." _Maybe because I'm a woman too,_ Haruka thought amused, shrugging.

"But do not tempt me too much, we Irish are pretty _sanguine_ , but please, please."

They sat on the desk and Coleen put her elbows on it.

"You should come here sometime more. Since last time it has been six months."

"I have a lot to do." Haruka replied, crossing one leg.

"Anyway, you know you can always count on me when you need help with the aid convoys."

"I will remember." She smiled at the other, who then narrowed her eyes suspiciously.

"I figured you were gravitating around here."

"Do not tell me." Haruka was ironic. "They told me about the girl you wanted to free me-"

"I did not want to free myself." She pointed out Tenou.

"She kept coming to the camp, she would get into serious trouble, I thought she could take her time here in something useful, and that's what happened." Colleen nodded, thinking about how they'd started teaching English to Samira, and how fast that was learning.

"And then there is that one of your soldiers ..."

"Oh, Richard."

" I remember him from the last time I saw you together, during the transfers from Baghdad to here. "

"Banks adore children, he is at ease at the Oasis."

"As far as I know, it's not the only thing he loves, in here." Colleen informed her, tilting her head. Haruka smiled.

"You do not tell me anything new. I figured Richard had some interest in Samira. "

"But you know what the funny thing is, that those two speak and speak, and eventually end up talking about you." Tenou did not answer.

"Well, I can not do anything about it." She then said.

"But I did not come here to gossip about a non-existent love triangle."

"Ah, no, what a pity." Joked Colleen, and Haruka spoke again.

"How are you put, with the main structures?" The woman sighed, leaning back in her chair.

"As you wish we are put: very bad." She rubbed her face before continuing. "Expenses are rising and money is getting cheaper." The aid we receive just covers the exits, and at the end of each month the budget has more flaws than the Titanic. " A bitter smile curved Colleen's lips.

"The children are more and more, and I'm not complaining about the tents, even if they almost fall apart ... We need a real building, Major, but the draw is long and-"

"I can give it to you, Colleen." The woman was displaced by that statement.

"And how?" Churches amazed. "I've been thinking about it for a while." She began to explain Haruka.

"I can unblock the seizure of an old Iraqi army barracks, which is under my jurisdiction, and I will let them be assigned to the Oasis."

"But the bureaucracy!" Colleen was base. "There are procedures for the assignment an-"

"Sometimes you just have to say 'Tenou' to open doors to places you do not imagine, Colleen." The woman was shocked with happiness.

"Because?" Haruka shrugged. "There's no reason why I want to do it, and that's it, but I'm only asking you one thing in return." Colleen nearly climbed the desk to get closer. "If you really do it, anything you want."

"The building will have to become a school, and if you believe that Samira can be able to, I'd like you to become one of your volunteers." The other looked at her puzzled. "It is not said that she wants it." "Then you will have to convince her." Colleen smiled.

"Why do you care so much for that girl, Major?" Then a thought struck her. "Then it is-"

"It's nothing like what you think." Haruka interrupted her, and it was true. She tried to think of a reason why she was so worried about Samira; why she had immediately felt she had to do something for the girl. Perhaps because she was very young. Or maybe because she was alone, just like her. "I rescued it from the bottom of the abyss, Colleen." She said then, after a few moments.

"And that day I swore to myself that I would helped her." Tenou stood up, indicating that the conversation had come to an end. The other also rose from the chair.

"So, bargain?" The churches, holding out her hand. Colleen squeezed it tightly. "Done deal."

They remained silent, and after loosening the woman, she turned around the desk. "Come on, I'll take you to her." They left the tent and Haruka walked backwards through the covered passage she had made in the first leg, finding herself again in the large tensile structure from which she had entered. But this time they crossed the perimeter of the wide tent, slipping into a further covered passage that Haruka had not noticed. They ended up in another little tent where there were a couple of single desks, and there they found Samira, dressed in white and with the usual chador on her head, talking tightly with Banks. The girl noticed the movement at the entrance to the tent, and gave a little cry of joy as soon as she recognized the familiar figure of Haruka.

" _Ruka_!" She said, splashing to her feet, and both Richard and Haruka themselves looked at her, perplexed, not only by the reaction, but also by the nickname with which she had called the woman. At those looks Samira realized that she had done something wrong and put her hands to her mouth, sitting down quickly: Colleen laughed, while Richard too took on an amused look.

"Well, Major, I told you she would be happy to see you."

"Mmh, yeah." Grunted Haruka, noting that the young woman's interest in her was not diminished as she had hoped, indeed. But now the other spoke a little English, and would be able to interact without using Banks as a link. And then have the opportunity to highlight certain things, for the good of the girl.

"So, how're we doing so far, Samira?" She then asked her slowly, making herself as understandable as possible, turning a chair opposite to Samira and sitting astride her, resting her arms on the back.

"Good." It was her, blushing. "Thank you, Ru ... Major." Both Haruka and Richard smiled at the correction made by the running girl. "Oh, very nice, your English is fucking awesome, Samira."

"And that means I'll be totally useless very soon," Banks sighed. "I look to you today, missy." Joked Colleen, and Samira blushed again.

"What do you think about our Major, Samira?" She did not therefore know how to refrain from asking. The girl looked at the ground, avoiding anyone's eyes.

"I think is _very_ _beautiful_."

"Ehy, and what about me?" Richard asked fakely offended, and a shy smile appeared on the girl's lips.

"I think you're beautiful, too." Haruka smiled, and Colleen approached the girl, resting her hand on her shoulder. "Be careful, Samira: You know, it would be better to use ' _beautiful_ ' for females and ' _handsome_ ' for males, but that's fine, missy, you're doing great." Samira nodded, and when Colleen had moved away-recalled by one of her coworkers' arrival at the entrance to the tent, Richard approached her ear.

"Speaking about Major Tenou, 'beautiful' is perfectly fine." He murmured, pulling a smile from her. "How old are you, Samira?" Then asked Haruka, starting to satisfy his curiosity.

"Nineteen." "Is there a boyfriend? A husband, somewhere out there?" Samira shook her head.

"I was married. My husband dead. " Richard looked for her.

"I'm sorry."

"I'm not sorry." The other was dry. "He was a good boy, but," Samira thought about the words to use. "But no love." Richard was about to ask her something, when Colleen called her attention.

"Richard, you speak Arabic, right?" He nodded, and the woman invited him to approach her, asking for clarifications on a dispatch that held the tall brunette girl next to her, and who were having trouble translating. Both Samira and Haruka watched the scene.

"You know, I think Richard has a crush on you." Suddenly Tenou told her. The other did not seem to understand.

"Crush?"

"He likes you." The girl did not answer, looking down. "He's a good guy, Samira, He's smart, quite handsome"

" _He's not you_." Samira said it with such conviction that Haruka understood that it was worse than expected.

"I'm _not_ a guy, first of all." She said softly, approaching her.

"I do not mind."

"You should." Her tone was hard. "Do not misread your feelings." And this is what you're doing. "

"I know what I feel."

"What you feel it's called 'gratitude'." Haruka explained slowly. "I can help you, and I'm more than happy to do that, but _you do not like me, Samira. This is just a phase."_

When she saw the other one shaking her head she added: "one day you'll find you way, Samira. You deserve to find someone who's going to take care of you. Someone who will marry you, give you a family and make you happy."

Samira looked at her with her deep dark eyes.

"I _marry you."_

Haruka then answered "you _cannot_ marry me, Samira. You know that, do you?"

But she smiled. "I _marry you."_

They looked at each other for a while. Then Haruka laughed. "You are do fucking stubborn, missy."

The girl titled her head. "... _fucking?"_

"Oh, don't listen to me." Said moving her hand. "I have a potty mouth."

Samira didn't understand what she said again, yet she had to laugh.

x

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _22 May,_ _2008_

 _Day 33_

Michiru tapped '12' on the keyboard near the entrance, then she pushed the key on which there was the shape of a bell. She waited, a minute later the door opened and she saw ahead her the hall of Haruka's flat.

"Good morning." The keeper greeted her and she answered the same way, and when his doors flew open she saw a man coming out dirty of paint.

She arrived at the last floor soon and she noticed Haruka's door opened and, above all, that there was a rather animated housing, she saw the floor covered with plastic tarpaulins and two men climbing ladders, intent on passing hands of white paint on the walls. One, younger, saw her as she turned absently to remove a brush from the large bristles from a side pocket of the pants, returning immediately to her work. But then Michiru saw him stop and turn back in her direction, definitely impressed.

"Hello." She said, stepping towards him, but then he spoke

"Stop! Don't do it, or you'll become dirty, miss." He was a middle age man, curly hair covered by a baseball hat.

"Is Major Tenou here, isn't him?" Asked then them and the guy leaned back on the stairs shaking his head.

"No, he is down in the garage."

Michiru arched an eyebrow, wondering what was Haruka doing in the garage, while they were painting her home. _Unless..._

She came back near the lift and pushed the key -1:

after a quick descent, the elevator doors opened wide on a long covered avenue, flanked on the right and on the left by light shutters that bounded the personal boxes. The road was a curve at the back, and Michiru could see the light of that sunny day reflected on the last shutter, a sign that the overhead door to the garage was open. And as she started to walk toward the light source, she heard a rather powerful roar, which disappeared as it had come. Michiru smiled, knowing exactly what she would find: just outside the garage Haruka was bent over the hood of a black sports car, dressed in a t-shirt the same color as the middle and a pair of sweatpants. Her lips moved in those that - Michiru was more than certain - had to be _colored curses_. Yet, as she approached the car, and having a way of observing its extremely aerodynamic shape, the wide wheels and the lateral air intakes, she could not prevent a feeling of uneasiness from digging them into a corner of her mind.

"What's this, a _rocket_ or a _car_?" Haruka just jumped, then smiled at the visit not entirely unexpected.

"I would say the first one." She was sly, rising from the bonnet and wiping her hands cleanly on a rag.

"I'll introduce you to my baby." She tapped the side. "Viper SRT-10. Six hundred horses of _pure power_."

"That shouldn't have been an easy deliver." Joked Michiru coming closer her.

"Not at all. I had to request it directly from the Dodge, and I spent whole days on the phone. "

The doctor tilted her head, staring at the car. "And I sense that the child here does not do exactly thirty miles an hour." "Officially, the maximum speed is 315 kilometers per hour, with a reaction time of about four seconds from zero to one hundred, but it really takes a little longer." Haruka turned to look at the girl, who had a shocked face.

"Does it comfort you to know that I've never been able to do more than three hundred?" "Oh my God, Haruka, no that does not console me!" Shouted the other, parandosele in front of her.

"You'll kill yourself! A _normal_ person can not drive such a deal without crashing!" "And who tells you that I'm a _normal person?_ " Michiru did not know what to answer, so on two feet. That Haruka was a person out of the ordinary already thought, but he certainly could not tell her. And certainly the fact that she had so strongly insinuated her thoughts, even imagining kissing her, was a more than valid confirmation. She watched her smile, then close the hood and head toward the passenger door, opening it.

"Come on, jump on."

"I do not get into the _air ground missile_."

"I just want to show you the insides." The girl thought about it for a moment, then sat on the black leather seat. Or better, almost laying on it.

"Wow." Was the only thing she could say, looking at its insides.

"Not bad, ne?" The other one asked after a long moment. "It's quite another thing compared at your hybrid SUV, uh?"

"You said you liked my car."

Haruka struggles. "In fact I like it objectively. But it's not my kind of car, as you can see."

"When did you buy that one?"

"When I bought the flat. And I decided to make me two presents else." Michiru leaned her elbow on the seat.

"If one of those is the second, what's the third?"

Haruka shook her head, a grin on her feature. " you'll find out later. You, rather. " she leaned a little towards the other, before continuing. "Do you have anything to tell me? "

"You're the one in therapy, not me."

"But you're the one who had a fiery weekend, or not?" Michiru recalled the events of the previous Friday, and sighed. "Let's say you were right. Samuel did not want the Playstation Hall key from me. " Haruka laughed.

"And did he have the key he wanted?" The other remained silent, considering whether to lie and see the reaction or be honest, obviously omitting certain details. She opted for the second one. "No."

"No?" The girl looked dismayed. "Did you send it blank?"

"Exactly."

"God, what a bitch you are!" Tenou exclaimed, shaking her head, and on the face of Michiru she painted an amused expression. "I am a girl full of resources." "Yes, no, Vallo to tell Foster." Michiru laughed, and Haruka stood up.

"Let me park the beast, and then go up. Have you seen the workers? " That nodded, getting out of the car.

"They will finish by noon, and at that time two of a cleaning company will come to give us elbow grease."

"In all this, when are you going to come to the hospital for therapy?"

"Come on, Doc, I have a house to fix." Haruka got into the car, putting the rag on the steering wheel to avoid dirtying it with greasy hands.

"And then, are not we already doing it?" The Viper started in a rumble, and followed a couple of frowns. "Exhibitionist." Michiru scolded her, and the other smiled from inside the cockpit.

"Are you sure you do not want to go up, not even from here at the box?" And in the negative response of that, Haruka made a small reverse and then slowly walked to one of the shutters near the elevator, which was already opening automatically.

"You're quite sure that the spaceship can safely turn down the road, uh?" Asked Michiru as soon as the other came out of their parking space, snatching a smile.

"And a car like many others, Michiru."

"A car like any other does not do 315 kilometers per hour." She pointed out the girl.

"Could not you buy something a little more, how to say, human?"

"I know my business, doc. Relax, or hyperventilate." The elevator doors swung open, and Haruka leaned against the wall after pressing the button on her floor.

"It seems to me that we have passed the self-destructive phase." Michiru continued, ignoring the comment of the other who, in response, looked at her amused.

"What is self-destructive in loving speed?" Michiru was about to reply when she saw Haruka stretch her arms in her direction, then taking her face in her hands; the thumb began to gently caress her cheek. "Do you know you're really adorable when you worry?" Michiru tried to figure out what she was saying and at the same time to clear her mind, especially to slow the heartbeat and - even more important - to avoid thinking of the feeling of Haruka's hands on her face. They stood in silence for a long moment, then Haruka approached her: the heart began to have an irregular rhythm, and Michiru felt the moment of the passing extremely close. Until one smile spread over the other's face.

"But how can you be fooled like that, every time?" She asked her, holding back the laughter, taking her hands from her cheeks and showing them to the girl: the black palms of fat opened at the sight of the doctor, who realized the reason for so much sudden expansiveness on the part of the other.

"What kind of ..." She did not finish the sentence, and groaned when, after touching her face, she found herself on the fingers of the black spots.

"You look like a rugby player." She watched Tenou, still smiling, and when Michiru raised an arm to hit her, she jumped out of the elevator, striding toward the entrance to the apartment. She greeted the two intentions to whiten the walls, to which a third had been added, and when she heard the doctor behind her, she entered the corridor of the sleeping quarters.

"There is a bathroom there." She said, pointing to a door at the back, stifling the last laugh, then Michiru saw her disappear into the room they had just passed. The bathroom was perhaps - along with the kitchen - the only furnished room in the house, and it was completely impersonal. The white tiles were barely covered with dust, with the marks of some prints that Michiru imagined were workers. Here and there there were droplets of water, and the shower cubicle had been used recently, as evidenced by the striations on the glass. Opposite was the sink, with a large rectangular mirror above it, and some spotlights to create one of the light spots in the room. Michiru saw the toothbrush left on the edge, the only sign of Haruka's presence, together with an ocher-colored towel badly abandoned on a steel tubing that served as a towel holder. She rinsed her face, thinking back to how the other had fun testing the resistance of her coronary vessels. Finding nothing more than the towel that was to be Haruka, she brought it to his face: the first thing he recorded was the girl's scent invading her nostrils. _Stop that. Stop it immediately_ , thought Michiru, distancing herself from the sensations that had emerged in her mind. She quickly put the towel down, folding it and putting it back in place, and returned to the corridor, exploring that part of the apartment unknown to her. Next to the bathroom two more doors opened, while later was the one beyond which Haruka had disappeared. She peeked into each of the rooms, astonished to find them already whitewashed and ready, but dominated by absolute emptiness: she understood why Tenou could not feel her home.

"Where did the furniture I saw the other day go?" She started when she found herself in the same room as Haruka. The other looked up from the sheet she was reading, while on the unmade bed were scattered documents, keys, several bank cards and a small cell phone. "I threw them in. And, ah," Haruka reached out and pulled a card from under the phone. "This is my number." Michiru smiled, and sitting down next to her, she put the piece of paper in her purse.

"This part of the house is ready," she then observed, and she nodded.

"They also worked on the weekend."

"But how did you convince the company?"

"I told them that a fascinating psychologist would be pleased to offer sexual services." Haruka replied without taking her eyes off the paper. The girl arched an eyebrow.

"I hope you are joking."

"Look, Welcome Pack sends the American Express strong."

"Haruka." The other smiled, letting the sheet fall onto the bed.

"Come on, of course I'm joking, of course you're a pretty gullible, you, huh?"

"Do you think it's easy to keep up with you when you talk?" Tenou did not answer, then took the credit card out of the box in which it was sent, and raised other papers to which papers were attached.

"Today I was about to go shopping, some ideas to furnish a house from scratch?" Michiru remained thoughtful.

"Do you have the measurements of the apartment?" Haruka slipped out of the yellow envelope - which Michiru identified as being delivered by the doorman the day they arrived - another sheet folded in two: she opened it, revealing the map of the house, with handwritten digits at the bottom.

"Yes, I took them tonight." The doctor looked at her puzzled.

"Do you have trouble sleeping again?"

"Let's say I've had problems with settling in. Nothing serious, anyway, I did not have to bang my head against the wall or stuff like that." Michiru continued to watch her, worried, wondering if getting her out of the hospital was not a mistake. The words of the other received it from their thoughts.

"I do not know where to start."

"Think that this house will have to reflect you, your style."

"Mmh, you make it easy."

"We should go around a bit, look for something you like."

"You do not have to come with me." Pointed out Haruka, but the other took on a stern expression.

"Are you kidding and giving up the opportunity to play dolls on a scale one by one?" Haruka frowned. "Doll's house to what?"

"Come on, it was to say." Michiru answered, before getting out of bed. "Come on, prepare, you need everything here, and maybe in our wanderings you will find something that will allow you to express yourself to the fullest." Tenou stretched her arms and legs, yawning.

"Okay, I'll have a shower and then let's go." "Obviously we will go with my car." She emphasized Michiru, and Haruka frowned: she looked like a child who had just taken off a new game.

"Reason, where will we put all purchases?" "How many things do you want me to buy, exactly?" Haruka inquired, and the other smiled.

"You have an Amex platinum, Haruka, what are you worried about?" She joked, pointing to the silver paper next to the girl, who smiled.

"I knew you were only interested in my money, but you never will." She replied to her back, with drama.

"Go get this shower, Major, and hurry up."Haruka smiled, getting out of bed.

"I like it when you're authoritarian." She said as she passed her, and Michiru pushed her away with both hands on her back, laughing and shaking her head.

x

"I want to do it _never again._ "

Michiru laughed at the shocked face of Haruka, while they carried inside the apartment the heavy sacks full of home stuffs.

"Stop it. We took a lot of things."

Haruka uttered one of her distinctive grunts, and once inside the doctor finally had full view of the apartment where Tenou lived, uncluttered by workers, painted and polished. She noticed for the first time that the wall to her right was occupied by a window and a large sliding window that looked out onto a balcony. And that from here you could see the Portsmouth Bay very well, just as Haruka had told her. "When you have finished contemplation, can you give me a hand?" Churches Haruka ironic, calling the attention of the girl, before going out again and reappear with a large flat box, with 'DVD Recorder' written on it. Michiru headed for the elevator and lifted the three bags of the supermarket - because the other seemed to have forgotten that she also needed food from time to time - and headed for the kitchen. Even that, like the bathroom, was totally impersonal: it was modern in style, with drawers and sideboards in steel and an island table in the middle. The fridge was open and disconnected from the electric current; she bent over to connect it to the socket, and then began to arrange the provisions. A long moment of quiet followed, and Michiru imagined that the other had come downstairs to recover the rest of their purchases. It had been a beautiful day, she assessed. She had learned more about Haruka than she ever could with her psychoanalysis sessions: she had learned her impatience at shopping, even though she had shown a completely feminine indecision in front of two lithographs depicting Steve McQueen in 'The Great Escape' , who had ended up buying both. She had seen her choose modern pieces, with a minimal, simple and functional style. And she had surprised her by asking her for more than one piece of advice, thus making her participate in the furnishing of her home. She smiled at the idea that Haruka was accepting her as a person who was becoming part of her life, beyond the professional help she had to undergo. That she was accepting her as a friend, albeit always maintaining a certain detachment on an emotional and emotional level. She heard the other go back and forth from the apartment, and when she faced the entrance, she found it filled with boxes and boxes of all sizes. She glanced at the clock, then picked up the bag from the island in the kitchen.

"Well, have fun." Michiru greeted her, taking the door. Haruka looked at her puzzled.

"Will not you be going?"

"I have something to do." It was twenty minutes to four, and since it was clear she would not go to the hospital that day, while Haruka was in the shower, she called Jenny to tell her that she would take Hotaru in kindergarten. Haruka put her hands on her hips.

"A moment, when we passed my American Express in readers, where was your engagement?" Michiru smiled.

"I did not think we were so late."

"You can not go!" Sub tended the other. "There's all this stuff to do, and in an hour they give me the room and the living room." "Haruka, I would be more than willing." She said softly, pulling away from the door and approaching her.

"But I really have to run away, see you tomorrow." The other remained silent and Michiru went out, moving towards the elevator. She repeatedly pressed the button to call it on the floor ... then she found herself looking at the floor.

"Haruka! Put me down immediately!" She screamed blushing, feeling the other's grip around her thighs and her waist: Tenou had put it in a sack of potatoes on her shoulder, and was striding towards the door of the house.

"Absolutely not, it's easy to leave like that, leaving all the work to do." Michiru laughed, but tried to assert her authority as a doctor. Although it was not really easy, in the position where it was. She found herself again in the entrance to the apartment, and she hit the girl in the back.

"Put me down, _Ruka_!" She made the mistake at the same instant in which the nickname, with which she often referred to Tenou in her own thoughts, left her lips. Haruka stopped and bending her knees made her get her feet back on the ground; scrutinizing the expression, Michiru understood that the serene and carefree mood that had accompanied the other until then had completely dissolved, as well as the color from her cheeks.

"Do not call me that anymore." The tone was cold, as much as the emerald gaze. Michiru tried not to be intimidated. "Because?" She then asked her, but that did not answer. " _Do not call me ... More_." She repeated peremptory, after a long moment, articulating every word. Michiru cursed herself for being so stupid.

"I'm sorry." She told her sincerely, and Haruka did not even look at her.

"But it would help me to know why it bothers you so much." Still the silence in which Tenou loved to entrench herself in her worst moments. Michiru watched her lean over a box, and start opening it. She glanced at the clock, and realized the extreme delay in which she found herself reflected an act on the situation, and how to remedy it: she did not think of anything else but to show Haruka confidence, letting her enter a part of her life that she still did not know.

In her mind the words spoken to Samuel returned: but Haruka was a friend, certainly not a relationship. And with the conviction that she was doing the right thing, she silenced the little voice that, in a corner of her mind, warned her of the risks involved in such a gesture.

"Would you like to come with me?"

"No." Michiru smiled at the speed with which the other had replied.

"Come on, I can not be late, there's a person waiting for me." Haruka raised her head to look at her, and the doctor saw the spark of a certain curiosity warm her hard eyes, before returning to pay her attention to the box.

"A person called me that." She told her after several moments of silence, and Michiru approached her.

"A person I loved."

"Who was it, Haruka?" She asked her, placing a hand on her back. The other, as always, stiffened at the contact.

"Was it Richard Banks?" She watched her shake her head slowly, and start staring at an undefined spot on the floor. Michiru understood that Haruka was slipping away from her eyes in front of her.

"Haruka." She called her, carrying her hand from back to shoulder and clenching slightly, but Haruka did not react. Then she put her other hand on her chin and forced her to turn around.

"Haruka look at me, look at me." She looked for the look off, emptied of something she could not know, present only in the mind of Tenou.

"If you want to go back there, this time you have to take me with you." She spoke firmly. And that seemed finally to be redeemed. She blinked repeatedly, then rubbed her face.

"Shit." She murmured, without meeting Michiru's gaze.

"Where were you, this time?" The churches, worried by that scary humoral peak. But Haruka did not answer, and when she did, ahe did not say what she expected.

"You'll be late, doc."

"We'll be late, you come with me."

"I do not want to go out."

"You need to distract yourself, it will do you good," Michiru told her in a smile, standing up.

"When I'm down, she's able to give me a good mood." Haruka tilted her head. " _She_?" The girl just nodded, without ceasing to smile.

x

They walked along the tree-lined driveway, Michiru slightly ahead of Haruka, approaching the low sand-colored building at the back. Haruka still felt troubled by what had happened just before. Feeling again the nickname that first Samira had given her had unleashed in something that was not able to define, not only for the wave of memories, for the loculus and imprisonment. But also for the realization that Michiru had made her way to call her. And this was not good. It was not good at all: the doctor was too bound to her, looking for friendship in any way. And she realized that a part of guilt was also her own, because she teased her, made fun of her. Because she wanted her close. _Or do you want it?_ She found herself thinking. They entered the building, and Haruka felt a shiver down her spine, although the temperature was quite high: the long corridor was dotted to the right and left by several doors; in the middle, on the walls hung designs and works created by decidedly childish hands. The memories of the Oasis, Colleen, and the children of Tikrit all swarmed her together.

"Wait me here." Michiru told her, pointing to some plastic chairs and then moving towards the end of the corridor. Haruka sat down, and watched the elegant gait, that graceful walk that - despite her heels - made it seem like she was almost floating, rather than walking. She wondered if Michiru was aware of the fact that she oozed refinement, without particular effort, in the eyes of third parties. And she could not explain why, but she remembered the fairy tale of the Little Mermaid, where the protagonist became human to pursue her love on the mainland: a _mermaid princess,_ with _aquamarine hair_ , looking for her _prince_. Haruka shook her head, then toppled her backwards. A _prince_ , Haruka, she thought, while her lips curled in a bitter smile. Not a _lesbian surrogate_. She drove those thoughts back into oblivion when she recognized Michiru's step again, this time flanked by a trotting to say the least. She bent her head back to look back in front of him, and saw her doctor holding a little girl by the raven-haired, long hair to the shoulders, cut into a bob. The little girl wore a stuffed bunny to her breast, and jumped cheerfully under the girl's loving gaze, but when she saw her she stopped jumping, taking a normal gait. She saw her pointing it out and asking Michiru something, that after looking at her, she gave her an answer that Haruka could not hear. When they were close Tenou laid her arms on her knees, intertwining her hands, and smiled.

"Hey, Snow White did not have seven, dwarfs?" Michiru rolled her eyes, while a bright little voice answered to Tenou.

"I'm not a septenan, I'm Hotaru!" Haruka raised an eyebrow, scanning the little girl who looked at her with two purple eyes and a smile from ear to ear.

"Are you a mother's friend?" Mom. She processed that word in the indifference of the facade. Of course, it was obvious. And she realized she was dealing with a more subtle person than she had imagined. She thought back to the provocation in Kaioh's office, to the joke with Foster, to the Music Therapy room: she had evidently pushed too far with her toys and Michiru had thought to stop her, slamming her full heterosexuality in the figure of her own. daughter. As if to say, there is no tripe for cats.

"Meet Haruka, Hotaru." Said Michiru, then looking for the look of Tenou who, in spite of the internal turmoil, outside did not make a fold.

"Hi Hotaru." It was the other, looking at the girl. "She is Luna!" The little girl exclaimed, raising the rag bunny in front of Haruka, who instinctively stepped back into her chair, surprised.

"Luna is offended if not the greetings." Michiru communicated that information with a disarming seriousness, and the other looked at her perplexed.

"She's a puppet."

"No!" Hotaru snapped. "He's not a puppet !! It's Luna!" Haruka looked alternately at one and then the other, then sighed, rolling her eyes.

"Hi, Luna." Michiru smiled, and Haruka stood up.

"And so you have a daughter." She told the doctor, who nodded.

"You never told me."

"You never asked me." Haruka remained pensive. "So, you were talking about her that day, in the hospital." Michiru looked at her confused.

"When I thought I was talking about me, not being respected and all that." The girl smiled, remembering the speech in the Dewenish park, then nodded.

"A road accident?" Then asked Haruka after a long silence, not without irony, and Michiru's eyes veiled with sadness.

"It's a very long story." _That I do not think I want to hear_ , added mentally Tenou, before the gaze fell on Hotaru: the girl had her head back, to be able to see from where that came, and stared at her open-mouthed.

"Why are you staring at me like that?" Churches, and Michiru smiled. "Hotaru has a kind of height fixation, I do not know why, and so far the highest person I've ever dealt with is Mamoru." Haruka did not answer, looking at Hotaru who did not stop staring at her. Then, to her dismay, she saw her raise her arms to her, and place herself on her toes.

"Do not think about it." She warned her, stepping back.

"Michiru, intervene."

"Honey, you can not go to Haruka's arms." She murmured, raising her in her arms, and Hotaru pouted.

"Why not?"

"Because I'm unpleasant." The girl informed her, and Michiru gave Tenou a questioning look.

"Take me home, please?" She then added, after they had started to leave the school. "The furniture is coming soon." The doctor nodded, and once outside she let off Hotaru, who ran to the slide followed by Michiru's careful glance.

"I'm sorry I can not help you today." The girl told her, without losing sight of the girl. That did not disappear.

"Imagine, I understand now." She could not swear, but in the flat tone used by the other she seemed to hear a note of resentment. "Why did you use the masculine first?" She asked then. "She asked me if I was your friend, she is small, why confuse it with explanations that go against something obvious in her eyes?" The reasoning did not make a turn, but Michiru bothered that Hotaru believed Haruka a man.

"How old is she?" Tenou's question took her by surprise.

"Almost three and a half." The corners of Haruka's lips bent slightly upward, following the girl with her gaze.

"She's pretty, and very smart, for her age." Michiru did not answer, displaced by the compliment to Hotaru. They remained silent for an interminable moment, before Haruka spoke again.

"She's very lucky to have you." She said that as she put her hands in her pockets and started for the driveway, towards the car, leaving Michiru pink from the doubt that, with that gesture, had accentuated the sense of solitude of the other.

x

 _Military Hospital "Edward Dewenish VA Medical Centre"_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _24 May 2008_

 _Day 35_

"Well then, the great day is coming closer."

Mamoru sipped his coffee, relaxed against the back of the comfortable office chair. "How do you feel?"

"Quiet, for the moment." Michiru did not look away from the window as she answered.

"I'm just tired, now the trials are more intense." Chiba nodded, placing the plastic cup on the desk. Then he smiled at the restlessness of the other.

"She did not arrive?" The girl nodded.

"No. She will make me die, sooner or later." Mamoru shook her head, then crossed his hands and rested his chin on it.

"You have grown fond of her, are not you?" The other broke away from the window, sitting in front of her friend.

"She's a very interesting person, she's made several steps forward in the last period and-"

"Do not talk to me on the clinical level, I know your situation very well, I speak on a personal level, Michiru." She remained silent for a long moment.

"You were right, Mamoru, taking care of Haruka is not only stimulating, but also therapy in therapy, seeing her progress is helping me a lot, staying close to her and helping her as much as I am." Chiba smiled. "I'm glad, but it's interesting to see how you keep it." He then added, tilting his head. "Oh, well." Michiru blushed slightly.

"Haruka needs her head to stay in. If you let her take over, she can do anything."

"I noticed." The man agreed.

"But after all, from someone like that, the first thing you expect is a certain charisma." Michiru nodded.

"A charisma that unfortunately, you see in a distorted way, even if I still can not manage it."

"Did you manage to get yourself to say anything about imprisonment?" The girl shook her head.

"No. She was pretty quiet these days, but she had a noteworthy humoral peak while we were at her house, she mentioned a person she never mentioned in this month." Chiba became thoughtful. "Do you think it was a good idea to get her out?"

"We certainly could not let her stay in the hospital forever." He looked at Michiru.

"And anyway, her sudden mood swings are now more like stand-bys: they suddenly go out, and she disappears, losing herself in her own personal world, which is probably dominated by something horrible." The girl sighed and remained silent.

"Her aggressiveness is now curbed." She resumed explaining.

"I would not have brought her with me if I had not been more than sure." Mamoru looked curious. "Flow where?" "Kindergarten, to get Hotaru."

"Did you introduce her to Hotaru?" The man was perplexed, and wondered if Michiru's affection for Tenou was not moving toward dangerous boundaries.

"I do not see why not, Haruka needs to dive into normal life contexts." After a moment of silence Mamoru sighed, and decided to express his concern.

"Michiru, you ..." The words seemed to weigh. "You always know that Haruka is a woman, is not she?" The other smiled.

"Of course, what's that got to do with this?" "You seem very taken in. That's all." Michiru shook her head, but avoided meeting her friend's eyes.

"I admit that my interest in her is no longer just professional. You said so too, Haruka started seeing me as a friend, and I feel like that too. " she failed to tell him what had happened in her office, and what had happened with Samuel. But she was frightened at the realization brought by Mamoru's words, or that it was easy for an external observer to read in her behavior no longer just a nascent friendship, but also a certain attraction towards Tenou.

"I'm just afraid you can misrepresent your actions, Michiru." It was Mamoru, serious. "May you think that you-"

"For Haruka, I'm a game, Mamoru." She interrupted him, pushing away those thoughts.

"She likes to provoke me, but as I have already explained to you, it's just a chatter, even though she once touched my ass." She revealed him, provoking the laughter of the other. She pulled the cell phone out of her bag and dialed Haruka's number again, but the operator's pre-recorded voice was still there to answer.

"Listen, I'm going." Michiru announced, putting the phone down.

"She had to be here an hour ago and she does not even answer the phone, I'm starting to get worried."

"Keep me informed." The girl nodded and went to the door, unable to drive away the discomfort that that conversation with Mamoru had brought with her.

x

Michiru's index was glued to the doorbell of Tenou's apartment for about twenty seconds, producing a high-pitched trill. The doorman had told her he had not seen the Major come out that morning, and so he had to be at home. Come on, _Haruka, open_ , he thought, leaving the button, and resting his palms on the door.

"Haruka!" She called, knocking on the surface, and a tremendous deja-vu seized his thoughts. _Hotaru's crying. The pungent smell of blood. Mitsuo._ She closed her eyes, and her breath choked in her throat. She leaned back against the door, thinking if she should call the porter to be opened, and it was there that she noticed a door ajar near the elevator, which she had probably noticed before but had not remembered. She approached the little door, which once opened revealed a narrow line of stairs that ended in a further door more or less above his head. She climbed it quickly, and opening that strange door she found himself on the roof of the building, a large flat surface covered for most of the beams that held solar panels. At the back, on an elevated structure, Michiru saw satellite dishes for satellite signal reception and TV antennas, as well as a wireless repeater. She walked in the shade of the panels, capturing the sun of that day, and when she emerged from that sort of corridor, a light breeze crept through the aquamarine foliage. She scanned the space in front of her, and saw a dark jacket thrown badly on the ground near the edge of the roof: Michiru felt faint. _I pray you. Oh, please, no_ .. "Haruka ..." She picked up her jacket and did not find the courage to look beyond the parapet.

"I did not throw myself downstairs, doc." The voice, hoarse from the hours of sleep and from several 10-year-old Bourbons, reached her ears from an indefinite point behind her, and almost a blow came to her. Turning around, she saw a pair of bent legs sprouting from where the block that held the antennas and the parabola created a kind of tooth, where the door to the electrical panels was, and ran the distance between herself and Haruka almost running : she found the girl sitting with her back to the wall, her head hidden between her knees and her arms folded, her hands clasped behind her nape.

"Holy Jesus, Haruka, what did you think of?" She almost shouted at her, kneeling in front of the other. "Do not answer the phone, I come here and I find you ... on the roof! What's in that head?"

"There's always a bit of wind up here, I like it." She revealed them without changing her position, the slightly kneaded voice muffled by her limbs.

"And then stop screaming, I have a hangover, a headache and it's really not a good time to do psychoanalysis." Michiru sat down next to her.

"Did you get drunk?"

" _Uhly is a euphemism_." The doctor sighed, shaking her head. She looked at the other's crumpled shirt, and noticed something in the portion of the neck that her arms could not hide.

"What is this?" Churches, stretching a finger to touch a purple stain on the skin of Tenou. In the silence of the other, Michiru could not help but smile.

"You see yourself with someone."

"I've seen more than one, if you really want to know." The doctor felt a hint of resentment veiling her thoughts.

"Well, it's a good thing." She told her after a few moments, and indeed as far as the clinical aspect was concerned, it was true. Personally, however, the idea of Haruka clinging to a girl did not completely excite her, but tried again to drive away that thought. Haruka moaned something that Michiru interpreted as a need to stomach, just lifting her head. And he noticed a further detail.

"Why are you wearing sunglasses?"

"Why is the sun, maybe?" Tenou was ironic. But Michiru saw a purple tinge come out from under the drop-shaped lens of the other Ray Ban, and stiffened. She held out her hands to take off her glasses, and Haruka resisted that gesture, initially. Then she let her do it, and at the sight of the girl the black eye of the other opened, accompanied by a cut on the cheekbone.

"What happened to you?" Michiru asked her worried, as Haruka leaned her head against the wall behind her.

"Anything."

"Did you get a black eye like that, for autogenesis?" A slight smile curved Tenou's lips.

"A jealous boyfriend." She revealed them after a moment of silence.

"Nothing, I have not even reacted, you should be proud of it."

"Fair? You look for rogne and I should be proud of it?" Michiru was incredulous.

"Do not make me regret getting you out of the hospital-"

"I want to go back there." Michiru was interrupted, and that sentence left her stunned. "As?" "Temporary leave, permanent leave, they are all bullshit." Haruka's tone had become hard. "Write a nice statement where you say I'm fine, Michiru, then give me a stamp and send me back there. I want to go back to Iraq."

"How can you ask me something like this, Haruka?" _Just to me, then_ , she added mentally. Haruka snapped her lips, then shook her head.

"I left home at the age of fifteen, Michiru, I was eighteen with NATO in Kosovo, twenty-one in Afghanistan, twenty-three in Iraq, I'm twenty-eight, including thirteen years in the military academy and war fronts. doc I just know that I want to go back there. "

"You can not go back to Iraq, Haruka."

"You do not understand, you doctors can never understand."

"And what would you like to understand, over there, huh?" A sigh full of pain came from the girl's lips, which then bent her head to meet the doctor's eyes. "I have to pay, Michiru, I have to go back to Iraq to remedy a profound injustice."

"What injustice are you responsible for?" Haruka remained silent for a long moment.

"To be alive, doc." The girl was struck by that statement.

"I do not want to hear that kind of idiocy anymore." She then said to her, hardly, after a long moment. "We've already talked about it, we'll have to work on it, but I can not help you if you give up at the start." "You have other things to do, Michiru, than take care of my problems." The other was banned, not immediately understanding what Haruka was referring to. Then she took the reference to Hotaru. "You say, because I have to keep up with you as a little girl, so I do not see big differences." That joke managed to tear a smile at Haruka, and Michiru sighed with relief, happy to be able to soften the tone. Suddenly the need came to embrace her, and after doing so she rested her chin on her shoulder to look at her. Haruka moaned, shaking her head.

"My God, do not do that."

"As well as?"

"So!" Broke the other, as if Michiru did not see the obvious. And the doctor considered taking a little revenge.

"You mean so ... so?" She asked softly, tightening even more to Tenou, who grabbed her wrists trying to detach her.

"Get out." Haruka told her.

"Absolutely not." "I feel like throwing up."

"It will mean that I will keep your forehead." Haruka rolled her eyes, moaning exasperatedly, and Michiru could not help but laugh.

"Stop being stuck to me!" The doctor fully enjoyed the discomfort of that, after the countless times they had found themselves in reverse parts.

"I'll leave you alone if you promise me that you will not say nonsense like the one you used to." She did not realize that she had just given her a handhold: she saw Haruka's green eyes sparkle, and her mouth curled into a smile. The hands of the other left her wrists and slid down to life.

"I promise you if you give me a kiss." Michiru tried to hide the surprise at that request. Then, knowing well who she was dealing with, she inclined her head.

"Okay, okay." Haruka's eyes widened when she saw Michiru bring her lips close to hers, and she swerved her head back.

"What the fuck are you doing?" She exclaimed, looking at her in dismay, arousing the laughter of the other.

"I do what you asked me." Tenou looked at her puzzled, and the other broke away without ceasing to laugh.

"See, you're all talk." Michiru teased her, and she pouted.

"And if I did not know you were more than straight, I would have said that I was hiding something." They sat in silence, then Michiru brushed Tenou's swollen cheek, getting a hissed grunt in response.

"You know, it will be a problem, this thing here."

"A problem for what?" Michiru reached into her bag and handed her a cream-colored envelope. Haruka opened it, and began to read the contents printed on the precious paper.

"A concert at the Norfolk Opera House?" Churches did not understand the connection, and the other nodded.

"You wanted to hear me play, did not you?" Haruka looked for her, then returned to the invitation.

"It's for two people, like this," Michiru gestured in the direction of the dummy. "You can bring someone with you." Tenou held back a laugh.

"I do not even remember her name." Michiru felt a strange relief invading her stomach. Then she saw Haruka stop, and put a hand to her mouth. "Haruka?" But that one shot up and ran away: the implacable _hangover_ was not even saving Major Haruka Tenou.

 **Author's notes: Hello! I'm finally back! I'm sorry but I just had tonight to write since my exams didn't leave me time. I'm glad that you guys are liking my ff, I appreciate it. Now on the plot will become more interesting and intense. Thanks to one of my reviewers who let me know about the grammatical errors and stuff like that, I already corrected them during this days ;). As always, leave a review if you have any doubt, or sent me a PM. Until next time this is Milla23 ;0**


	10. Chapter 10

**Enjoy it!**

 **Fathers**

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _26 May 2008_

 _Day 37_

The traffic light was still red, and she threw down a vacuums while waiting for the green light to give the green light.

She felt upon herself the curious, and enviously, gaze of the boy in the Toyota who flanked and a smile is painted on his lips, kept well hidden by the helmet.

"Ehy, Ehy friend." She turned to the car: the guy was down the window, and now he signals himself in his direction.

"What is the GSX-R 1100?" She glimpsed the orange light of the traffic light in the roadway that crossed hers, and again gave a pair of faint.

And when that is done red, a mental countdown started. Three. Due. One.

"No." He answered dry at the time still waiting, which did not give up.

"So it's 1000, eh?" She took the green, and freed all the power of one thousand cubic centimeters and the four-cylinder engine in line, burning the Toyota, and in the same way the others still stopped. The front wheel is slightly lifted, but moved the weight forward to tell from the black and silver arrow that it is riding.

 _First_. _Second_. All around is confused, mixed with speed as it sped along the dark strip that had become the asphalt. _Third_. _Fourth_.

Lost feelings awakened in her. She remembered the adrenaline at every break and at every turn; the emotions of those days, the only gift from the General she remembers, shortly after the death of her mother.

When she still did not know what he was preparing, and studying, in every detail. When it is still not known that other adrenaline addictions have entered the circle, like those before every blitz, when clenching the rifle was thrown headlong into the fray, emptying the mind and letting yourself be guided by pure and uncontrolled madness.

Because every moment could be the last one. And, really, she did not care.

 _Fifth_. _Sixth_.

She saw the asphalt, at the bottom, deform in a curve, before bending and facing. He opened the gas again, and Suzuki roared his approval for the maneuver. And the closer it got to the curve, the more the braking moment was brought to its extreme limit.

She considered, for a moment, not to stop, and let the fate of a fate of cruel joke decided to leave her alive in Iraq, finally recovered as it was.

After all, who should have cried her death? That question brought with it an unexpected answer: because now someone was insinuated in her solitude.

The fingers quivered on the clutch, undecided.

 _She who always said she wanted to help her. She had been shocked by the car as much as she had been shocked to learn that she had a daughter. She who hid a deep pain, which was seen clear and clear in those blue eyes, the day when she had left her just to think that she could not help it._

Yes, it's just a memory, a Mosul. What an irony, she thought: for the theory of the six degrees of separation, there to say that you have known it since 2004.

The curve was now approaching, and _the point of no return_ dangerously close.

Her face framed by aquamarine hair filled her thoughts, again. And she wondered if her life was worth even one of Kaioh's tears. _Fifth. Fourth. Third_.

The bike lasted one lap, and braking the crease setting to face the curve. The vehicle scrabbled furiously, but it was quick an unpredictable to its recalcitrant wheels. ' _Coward_ ', mentally reproached herself, returning straight to the saddle and pushing the clutch.

 _Fourth. Fifth_.

She passed the sign indicating the entrance to the Edward Dewenish Medical Center, which disappeared from the peripheral view momentarily, and the Suzuki's engine roared again as the asphalt slid away beneath the wheels.

x

"I'll kill her, I swear I'll do it." Michiru closed the communication, while for the umpteenth time Tenou's cell phone was ringing.

Like the doorbell of her house, and she, standing on the landing, felt like a perfect idiot.

Once again, she did not show up at the hospital, and wondered how long it would be before the Dewenish administration started asking questions, at best.

Who asked her head, at worst.

She picked up the phone intending to call Haruka again, when she turned and saw the elevator doors open: on the tip of her tongue she already had a series of invective to download on her stubborn patient, but instead of Haruka she saw a figure dressed from head to head feet of dark technical clothing, and a well-worn helmet on her head.

The centaur stopped as soon as he saw her, and Michiru watched her bring her hands to the edge of her helmet and start pulling it off: she could not stop a moan of dismay, deriving from the realization of what that clothing meant, when from under the shell black as the clothes opened Tenou's face, which shook her head to revive the blonde hair in a very theatrical gesture and, Michiru was more than certain, not entirely involuntary.

 _A motorcycle. She also has a motorcycle_. "Look, if I keep finding you here, I'll denounce you for stalking."

Michiru watched her approach her, all smiling, and folded her arms to her chest. "If you came to the hospital, I would not have to sit here impaled in front of your door."

"And who is forcing you?" Tenou raised an eyebrow.

"They pay me to treat you, Haruka, if you do not come to the hospital, how can I show you doing my job?"

"Bah." Haruka snapped her lips as she inserted the key into the lock and opened the door wide.

"As if Chiba fired you for real." Then she looked for the other's eyes, smiling slightly. "Someone still claims that you two do it without your wife's knowledge, doc." Michiru shook her head, and followed the other inside the apartment, which now had a new appearance, thanks to the furnishings they had chosen together.

Her first encounter with the other came back to her mind, and she smiled.

"And I'm more and more convinced that you have a forked tongue." She saw Haruka open her mouth to answer her, but then stop and, grunting something, put the helmet on the dining table and take off the jacket that he threw to the side, falling on one of the two L-shaped sofas on the right side of the living room.

Michiru could not explain her own blush at the sight of the other when she was wearing a rather tight t-shirt, which for the first time did not hide her feminine forms: she decided to distract herself by grabbing Tenou's jacket, and while Haruka disappeared into the kitchen , he touched the reinforcements on her shoulders, elbows and back.

"Strange." She said after a long moment. "What's strange?" Asked Haruka, pulling away from the bottle of water she was drinking.

"On 'forked tongue' I expected a joke, at least slightly vulgar." That made herself thoughtful, then she shrugged

"Mmh, it's true, I had not thought about it." Michiru tilted her head, convinced that the other had thought about it, but had refrained from telling her.

Since she had introduced Hotaru, Haruka had cooled.

She avoided jokes with obvious double meanings, or being closer to them than necessary. She had often rethought their talk on the roof, and had begun to fear that the devastation sought by Tenou had to do - as well as with their own inner conflicts, even with the learning of the child. And that her gesture had brought more damage than anything else.

That Haruka had, in some way, felt abandoned? What for the other was becoming a kind of landmark, in that kind of roller coaster that was its existence? Without leaving her jacket, she approached the table, touching the helmet with her fingers.

"Was this the other gift? A motorcycle?" Haruka looked indignant.

"A bike, but no, the helmet is for the Millennium Falcon."

"You did not see it, parked here outside?" The girl looked at her inquisitorially.

"Was not that thing that you insist on calling cars?"

"That thing has a name, it's called Dodge Viper." Broke off the other, putting them in front of her.

"How would you feel if you called Hotaru 'what'?" The doctor looked at her basely. "What's that got to do with it? Hotaru is a girl, not a car."

"Said the woman who forced me to greet a puppet." Michiru left her jacket and pointed her forefinger on her chest.

"Well, listen to me, I refuse to fix your head if your desire, not even so unconscious, is to break your bones." Haruka looked at her for a moment, perplexed. Then she began to laugh, moving away from her.

"Do you know that you are a single annoyance, but who are you, my mother?" "I'm a person who cares that it does not become a Tenou jam." The other shook her head, without without ceasing to smile.

"I'm not naive, doc." She reassured her then. "I already told you, I know my business."

"And what would this phantom be yours, let's hear." The churches, not at all consoled by the answer.

"I'm really curious, because if it's the same that makes you hold alcohol ..." Michiru left the sentence on hold, returning with her mind to the morning spent helping Haruka stomach.

Which, after all, had also been rather instructive: she had never seen anyone throw up so much. Haruka rolled her eyes, stepping back a few steps to lean against the edge of the living room table.

"I admit I had better days." And she scratched the back of her head, before continuing,

"I think I did not even thank you for staying." The doctor shrugged. "I'm sure I have an abusive distillery in front of me, rather than a champion of Etiquette. "

"Oh, what a ball." She snapped, resting her hands on the table behind her.

"You're fine with nothing." Michiru smiled, and approached her again.

"Bike aside, I'm glad to see you're better, did you detoxify yourself yesterday as I told you to do?" Haruka nodded.

"I spent the day drinking water and sleeping, and," she pointed to a point behind Michiru's shoulders,

"playing the Playstation." The girl turned, and saw in the middle of the large black-lacquered wooden bookcase - which now occupied almost the entire wall between the door that led into the sleeping area and the one that looked out on the balcony - right next to the forty-five-inch flat screen, the latest in the Sony console. "Do you want to play a game?" Asked Haruka amused, sitting on the couch, but Michiru shook her head, flanking her.

"No. I'm a total wimp with those business." "Sure, I have the new Tekken."

"The new Tekken!" Michiru's eyes widened, feigning a surprised expression.

"And what would it be?" Tenou looked at her puzzled, and wondered if Kaioh was there or did. Then, after a long moment during which the girl did not stop staring - probably still waiting for an answer, she got up from the couch and headed for the table, where they had remained jacket and helmet.

"Okay," she began, grabbing the garment and pulling it to a surprise Michiru, who took it on the fly more for an unconditional reflex than anything else.

"In Iraq, the best way to understand things was to see them with your own eyes. The doctor looked at his jacket first, then Haruka.

"Jokes?" But that was already gone in the corridor and Michiru stood up, holding the garment tight. She felt tears and the noise of crumpled paper, and shortly thereafter Haruka returned, holding a helmet very similar to the one she had seen her coming from, from which she was removing cellophane residues.

"They're going to be a little big, both this and the jacket, but we do not have to do the coast to coast of the country, so it'll be just fine." Haruka handed the helmet to Michiru, who stepped back.

"I'm still young to die."

"Come on, Michiru!" The other broke.

"You always tell me that I have to trust you, but how can I trust you if you do not do it first?" Tenou's reasoning did not make the slightest twist and, after a moment of uncertainty, took the helmet with both hands.

"If I had known, I would have made a will." She gave her a smile, and the other rolled her eyes.

"Exaggerated, but if it comforts you, I do not have a will." Tenou went to the door, grabbing the helmet from the table and a sweatshirt that tied up to the neck, and Michiru followed her into the elevator while wearing the jacket, feeling small inside the garment of at least two sizes larger than that that she used to wear.

The garage opened to their sight, and the Haruka box shutters began to rise as Tenou pressed a small remote control key with keys.

Michiru recognized the back of the Viper and, next to it, the object of discord: he watched Haruka climb astride the racing bike, and move back to the box with the engine off; as she put on her helmet she pressed another button and the garage door at the bottom of it began to open. "Come on, doc."

She encouraged her by tapping the skewered passenger seat before starting the engine.

Michiru groaned at the roar of the vehicle. _Oh Jesus_.

Haruka helped her to settle behind her, then, bending slightly to the side, pointed her forefinger toward an indefinable part beneath her butt.

"There should be handles down there, to hold on."

But in response, Michiru clung to her back, wrapping her arms around her waist and clutching her tightly enough to make her cough.

"Yes, and fall as soon as we get out of the garage?" Haruka did not move, but after a long moment Michiru heard her sigh.

"Well, I looked for this one." She heard her say, her voice muffled by the padding of her helmet, and he could not help but smile from ear to ear.

Haruka took her hands and placed them better, at the level of her stomach, and after a couple of faded, the bike went out into the sunlight and entered the road, heading for Virginia Beach.

Tenou smiled, protected by her helmet, when at the first acceleration she felt Michiru's arms tighten her strongly, and suppressed in a corner of her mind that feeling of well-being born of that contact with the doctor.

At the same time, Michiru tried to relax thinking that, all in all, dying embraced in Haruka could not be so bad.

x

"Michiru, if you press a little more, _you will make me the Heimlich maneuver_."

The girl opened her eyes, and quickly releasing Haruka from the hold realized that they were finally still.

"Sorry." She muttered, taking off her helmet, and the other gave her a hand to get off the Suzuki.

She also took off her helmet and, after putting it on the bike's tank, leaned on it. "Still convinced of Tenou's jam?" Then asked Haruka, a smile to curl her lips. Michiru did not answer immediately, not entirely inclined to give it to her.

But the experience was certainly something: Haruka seemed to be one with the vehicle, and not having problems with the speed.

"I admit that maybe you're right, in fact, you know your stuff."

"I knew I'd change your mind."

"I said maybe." Haruka tilted her head, and Michiru glanced at the beach that extended beneath them, leaning against the wall that marked the roadway.

"I drove my first bike that I was not even fourteen, doc. I do not miss the experience." The voice of the other reached her ears, and she felt her gaze on her; but when dhe turned around, Haruka preferred to stare at an indefinite point of the horizon, still firmly sitting on the bike,

"When my mother died, I ended up on a very unreliable tour. The idea of being alone with the General was something unbearable. "

Michiru felt a shiver running behind her back at the thought of what Tenou could do, shocked by the pain of her mother's death.

"But one morning he had me find a motorcycle, I thought he never even realized how much I loved speed and racing, but he was there in the garage of our house, it was a Honda, a hundred and twenty-five cubic capacity. , to tell the truth."

She smiled at that memory, mind Michiru tried to process the image of a fourteen year old Haruka riding a motorcycle.

"One day he threw me out of bed, and we took a plane to California, and stayed a week, in which I was allowed to shoot in Laguna Seca, riding a prototype of Honda, I thought I would have died of happiness: it had always been my dream to run in a real circuit. "

"He must have moved seas and mountains, to do it." Haruka shrugged.

"He never went into detail, he just told me that he had contacted some of his friends in Japan, and my father was never proffessional."

"I do not know why, but it does not surprise me." Tenou smiled at the joke, aware of the resemblance to the parent. Then she came back serious, assuming a thoughtful air.

"I think it was the only thing he ever did for me." Michiru reflected on those words. "Haruka, I do not justify what your father did to you," she began to say.

"But I refuse to think that it could remain indifferent to such a situation, a minimum of affection-"

"Takeshi Tenou does not love anyone, outside of himself." Haruka interrupted her, looking at her.

"He did not do it out of affection, I'm more than certain, he was interested in me not going into other trouble, waiting to put his plan into action."

"How long have you not heard?" Haruka thought for a moment.

"The last time I saw him was returning from Iraq in February, he told me I had done my duty, that being taken prisoner was part of the game." The other widened her eyes.

"He could not have told you something like that."

"He himself was taken prisoner in Vietnam, and that experience earned him honor, it earned him respect, and for him what happened to me is something to boast about." Michiru was appalled. Then a thought struck her.

"He knows?" But Haruka shook her head. "No." She remained silent for a long moment, before resuming talking.

"From that day we have not spoken to each other."

"Do you know that they landed at Mamoru's house at five in the morning, the day after the episode here in Virginia Beach, to order your shelter?" A flash of amazement passed into the girl's eyes, but disappeared immediately.

"Once again, he only worried that I would not create more trouble, and that someone good could give me a hand, to be able to postpone me there, certainly not to get a permanent leave." A sigh came from Tenou's lips, and Michiru approached her.

"I spent a lot of time wondering how it could be having a father who loves you." Haruka's statement filled the doctor's heart with bitterness.

"Then I understood, I realized that I did not have to expect anything from him, and that I would have to do it alone, all the time." "You are not alone, Haruka." The words came out spontaneous, and sincere, from the lips of Michiru, and the other looked at her without emotion.

"How is your father?" She then heard herself ask, and was struck by the unexpected request.

"He was fantastic." She merely told her, and Haruka realized the loss at that time in the past.

"Excuse me, I did not want to be intrusive." Michiru shook her head, and put a hand on her back, her shoulders barely bent.

"I would say that for today it may be enough, Major."

Tenou smiled, looking for her gaze.

"You see, I do not have to come to the hospital." The other one rolled her eyes, exasperated, and Haruka stretched her arms, bending them behind her head.

"Are you nervous about the concert?" He suddenly said to her, and Michiru looked at her in surprise.

"A little." She admitted, and she watched her bring her fingers to the cheekbone now deflated, but still had a purple complexion tending to black, also extended to part of the orbit.

"You know, I do not think I'll spend the day after tomorrow." He told her after a moment, and Michiru smiled.

"You could get some foundation." She suggested: Tenou groaned at that advice. "Better dead, than make up." Michiru hit her shoulder, and whistled.

"However, when it is said to have a half-measure." Haruka refrained from answering, and put on her helmet.

"Come on, it's time to come back."

"Oh, right, there's also the return."

"If you want to take a taxi, go ahead." She challenged the other, before giving her a long, narrow key, pulled out of a trouser pocket.

"What's this?" Asked Michiru curious.

"It's the key to my house, so you'll stop planting the tent on my landing, and maybe you'll even be useful, waiting."

The doctor inclined her head.

"For whom did you take me? For a Maid?" She heard Haruka's laughter muffled by the helmet, and after taking the key she pulled her own, then climbed back on the Suzuki.

"Hold on, I would not like to turn around halfway and not find you." Michiru slapped her helmet, and Tenou laughed again as the bike roared her return to life. And along the way, each lost in their thoughts as the vehicle hurtled over the asphalt, Michiru wondered if in the speed Haruka was, in some way, looking for herself.

x

 _Portsmouth, Virginia,_

 _28 May 2008_

 _Day 39_

 _1,31 am_

She stroked Hotaru's hair, asleep with her head on her lap, while the images flowed on the living room TV, bathed in darkness. " _Hey, how do you feel, dad_?" She was asking for a male voice, belonging to the person who held the camera. The black-haired boy turned his cobalt gaze toward the screen: his face was tired, but his eyes flickered with happiness, while he cradled smiling the bundle wrapped in a pink cover. " _It's really a good feeling." "You have a twisted face, Mitsuo_." The voice outside the field continued, and the boy rolled his eyes. " _Well, I'd like to see_." He answered, returning to look at the child in his arms. " _The princess has well thought of being born in the middle of the night_." A smile escaped Michiru's lips, and a tear slid down her cheek. She watched the image on the screen catch the little hand sticking out from under the flap of the blanket.

" _Hotaru, greets my grandfather, hi, grandpa_." The boy now did not stop looking at the girl in his arms, and slowly bent to touch the baby's forehead with his lips. Michiru pushed the pause button, and the screen crystallized that kiss.

She recalled those happy moments that never, never, would have presaged the precipitate of events, in two months' time.

She wondered, for the umpteenth time, where she was wrong; how could she have let Mitsuo slip back into oblivion without realizing it. She swore that she would not repeat that mistake, and let a first suffered sob come out of her mouth.

And then, one after the other, tears broke the banks and Michiru covered her face, while Hotaru slept the same innocent sleep as when, with just a few hours of life, _her father_ was holding her in a hospital room of Portsmouth.

The gaze full of love, apparently free from the demons who, from his return from Iraq after the assassination of Mosul, instead would no longer abandon him.

x

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _28 May 2008_

 _Day 39_

 _8:48 am_

She placed the bouquet of white lilies on the grassy mantle, just in front of the granite headstone. Then she crouched down in front of her, brushing her against it: she shuddered at the touch with the cold stone.

"Already three years, otou-san." She murmured, putting her fingers on the engraved letters, stroking them one by one; on the figures indicating the date of birth and death, May 28, 2005.

' _I'm sorry, Miss Kaioh. We did everything we could, but his father did not make it. I am mortified..._ ' she kicked out of her mind the memory of what the doctor had told her, in the waiting room of the Reanimation, shortly after receiving the news of the infarction that had struck him.

"I miss you," she said, shaking her head.

"I needed you, I still need you, I do not know what to do, I'm so confused I'm afraid of myself, Dad, of my feelings, of what I feel ..." she released a sigh and stayed for a long time to think about the grave, trying to get a comfort that did not come; hoping that somehow something would be revealed, helping her to understand what was happening around her.

x

 _Harrison Opera House,_

 _Norfolk, Virginia_

 _Day 39_

 _8:41 pm_

 _You can do it. You can do it._

Michiru took a deep breath, trying to slow down the beating of the heart. The mirror in the dressing room brought back an elegant and refined image, in the blue linen and viscose dress up to the knee whose drapery at the height of the breast created a curling in the shape of a rose.

She poured some water from the jug on the low table at the side of the door, and slowly sipped the liquid, trying not to think about all that was that day, but only to the chords and the music that, shortly thereafter , would fill the Opera House concert hall.

She breathed deeply again, making the failure of any attempt to calm down discouraged.

She decided to get out of the dressing room and reach the large hall where the public was already starting to flow, and after going through the maze of narrow corridors that constituted the backstage - and reassured several employees that would return immediately - found herself on the edge of the parterre : some orchestras were tuning the instruments, while others chatted with friends and acquaintances. The great hall was animated by the cheerful chatter of the audience waiting for the Memorial Day concert to begin.

She took a few steps, looking for a friendly face in the crowd.

Or just a face, in particular. And to the previous emotions that still made her ask what the hell she was doing there, she added the unpleasant feeling of being able to see Haruka in the company of someone. She continued to enter the parterre, making her way through the many bystanders, many of whom began to take their seats. She spotted Mamoru and Usagi, and started to approach them when a corpulent invited in a tuxedo bumped her involuntarily: the twelve heel betrayed her, and she could already be seen on the ground if not for a body behind her and two hands to grasp her elbows, helping her to recover the balance.

"Welcome." A familiar low voice murmured, and Michiru turned to find herself staring into the emerald irises of Haruka.

And to lose, for a moment, the use of the word: Tenou wore a dark suit, complete with a white shirt and a black tie that was lost inside the buttoned jacket.

Her hair had been arranged, which now was evidently shorter, although some rebellious strands kept falling before her eyes, and Michiru had to appeal to all her will not to reach out and move them; the face had only a small dark spot at the level of the cheekbone, and she imagined that Tenou had succumbed to the magic of a compact foundation. Haruka's voice picked her up from that gigantic 'wow' that engulfed her thoughts, and she hoped she would not see that much, outside.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" She asked that one, raising an eyebrow.

"I do not go well?"

 _Oh my God, you're doing just fine. Go very well_.

"I am surprised." Michiru told her instead, recomposing herself.

"You thought I was in uniform." Haruka pouted, and took a flap of her jacket between her thumb and forefinger, lifting it up a little.

"I arrive in _Armani_ , and you want the uniform?" Michiru smiled, and raised her hands in surrender.

"Okay, let's leave it, thank you for coming, I'm very pleased." Tenou smiled too, and, pulling aside her jacket, put her hands in her pockets, nodding.

The constant coming and going of people around them was nothing short of annoying, and Michiru pushed Haruka to one of the entrances of the hall, savoring the momentary and ephemeral quiet of the corridor revealed to her after she had moved the velvet curtain away.

"So we can talk more freely." Haruka looked around without looking at Michiru, who was trying to hide the anxiety of the ever more pressing concert and the total admiration for the other's set under a quiet façade. "Are you alone?" She could not resist asking the doctor. Haruka tilted her head, and a sardonic smile curved the corners of her lips.

"Yes." She told her after a long moment. Michiru nodded, trying to mask the relief derived from that answer.

"Do you already know your place? Did you ask the hostess?" She began to ask her in a burst, snatching laughter at the other. "Calm down, I just arrived, and I was just looking for my row of chairs before someone fell on me." The girl blushed slightly, then Tenou seemed to reflect on what she had just said.

"Did you say hostess?" Michiru laughed, shaking her head. A nervous laugh, and Haruka understood it immediately.

"It will be great, Michiru, do not be so nervous." The other suppressed her surprise, always unwilling to the altruistic outbursts of Tenou, and instead released a sigh. She wanted to tell her how hard it was for her to be there, and the reasons for the weight she carried in her heart.

Instead, she remained silent and Haruka did not inquire, respecting her.

"Hotaru is not there?"

Michiru did not expected this question.

"No." She then informed her, accompanying denial with a movement of the head.

"I would have liked it, but a concert of more than two hours is not ideal for such a small child."

A dismayed expression was painted on Haruka's face.

"A moment, like more than two hours? You did not tell me." The doctor snapped her lips.

"You're big and vaccinated, do not complain." Haruka grunted her disagreement, and scratched her head. Then she looked at Michiru from head to toe, as if seeing her for the first time. "Pretty dress."

"Oh." It was the only thing that managed to articulate the other, smoothing imaginary folds.

"Mh, maybe it's better to come back," she told her then.

"I'll help you find your place, then I'll go." Vocal invested her again when she found herself in the hall, and her attention was captured by a fully dressed steward, an identifying pass hanging from his neck. "Miss Kaioh, I was looking for you! She has to come with me, we're about to start." Michiru nodded and started to turn to Haruka when she felt the other's hands on her shoulders, and Tenou's lips touch her ear. " _Lay us all, tiger._ "

x

The _Maestro_ stood up from the piano stool when Michiru entered the Opera House stage, welcomed by the applause of the vast audience.

She kissed her hand, gathering a smile and a small bow from the other, who held the violin and bow with her free hand.

She returned to her seat as she settled herself in front of the music stand with her own score, the instrument firmly positioned between the shoulder and chin. She exchanged a look with the pianist, who with a nod of his head let her understand that he was ready. Michiru closed her eyes, and every emotion was amplified, making herself vivid.

She channeled those feelings into her hands, the mind that stopped thinking in order to leave control to her heart, whose furious beat was slowly regulating itself. The fingers pressed the chord and the bow rubbed on the strings, starting the melody that was soon accompanied by the sound of the piano. Through the notes Michiru spoke to the ignorant audience of Mitsuo, her father, Hotaru. And in a complete catharsis, the girl dissolved that pain, held for so many, too many years, in music.

x

 _Handshake, 'thank you'._

 _Handshake, 'thank you_ '.

Yet another narrow.

' _I'm flattered, thank you_.'

Michiru was exhausted. The evening had been a success, and her performances warmly acclaimed by the audience: after the debut, with two pieces accompanied on the piano, it was produced in a solo that had aroused a standing ovation even if, initially, at the end of the piece Michiru she was baffled by the two or three seconds of silence in the audience, which then exploded into applause.

But of what he thought all those people cared less than nothing: she needed only one hot comment. But it seemed that the whole Opera House wanted to congratulate her that evening, and she had not managed to free herself up until that moment.

She left the enthusiasts Mamoru and Usagi to head for the buffet organized in the Hall, the heart that was beating wildly for fear that Haruka had left.

She crossed a hall, finishing at the beginning of a connecting corridor between that and a secondary concert hall.

And there she saw her. She stood in front of the wall, slightly bent forward, her hands in her pockets, and watched a series of photographs hung on the wall, dating back to past events in the Opera House. Michiru smiled when, approaching her as silently as possible, she noticed the knot of the loose tie.

"Look, it's hard to get behind me." Haruka informed her, barely turning her head to the other girl.

"I thought you were gone, I could not find you anywhere."

"And get me the buffet? You're crazy." Michiru laughed. "What are you doing?" Haruka motioned for her to approach. "I took a ride, and I found these, look." She pointed to Michiru, a black-and-white photo of a long-legged woman in evening dress, her light hair tied in a bun, smiling at the lens holding a bouquet of flowers in one hand, while with the other she was touching the edge of a grand piano positioned on the stage.

Michiru's eyes widened as she concentrated on the face of that, recognizing in a moment a familiarity.

And more for a confirmation that did not need anything else, read the tag placed under the photo.

'Emily Woodsbridge; celebration of Genius of Mozart's Evening, October 27th, 1978 "And your mother." She murmured in amazement, leaning towards the photo as if she wanted to get inside.

"She was beautiful, was not she?" She asked her that.

"She was still happy here, she always was, when she was playing." Haruka remained silent, trying to fetch old memories from the darkness, now buried by the heavy ruins that were her youth.

"She talked through the music, she told how much she loved my father with the piano, and vented the pain of when he, quite inconceivably in his eyes, accused her of having brought me into the world." Michiru watched Haruka's emotionless face, the cold emerald eyes staring at the young and eternal image of that mother who must have loved more than herself, and whose death was a wound still open and bleeding for Tenou.

"Playing she expressed herself, freeing her feelings, a little like you did tonight, Michiru." The girl looked at her in puzzlement, realizing how much Haruka had gone deep and understood her own outburst in the music.

"You spoke to us tonight, I do not know what, but the more I watched you play, the more I realized, doc." Haruka looked for the other's gaze.

"Perhaps of him ...?" Tenou's eyes were of unbearable intensity, and Michiru had to answer them.

She just nodded, and Haruka did not add anything else. But Michiru felt she owed something to the other.

"My father died on this day three years ago." She said everything in one breath.

"It was not easy for me today, but it was a liberation, in a sense, to know that I could do it." Haruka's face remained the same indifferent mask as before revelation.

"I see." She simply told her. For a long moment, silence filled the narrow corridor. "It was amazing." She told her then.

"You looked like another person on that stage, I saw a side of you I did not know." Haruka smiled at her, and Michiru was relieved of the subject's turn.

"Ah, _Skywalker_ , that was the dark side of the Force."

She joked, and Tenou did not stop smiling. "You made me excited, and I assure you that it has not happened to me a long time, doc." Michiru basked in those compliments, the smile that spread from ear to ear as she looked away, clearly embarrassed by the reaction.

"Well, you deserved it tonight, but do not get used to it." Haruka looked back at the picture, and a slight sigh left her lips.

"You know Michiru, probably a lot of things would have gone differently if she were still alive, but I'm sure of one thing: you would have liked her, and quite a lot." The girl cocked her head. "Artistic affinities?" Haruka laughed.

"Yes, surely, but not only. My mother would have loved everything you're doing for me, doc. "

Michiru did not answer, struck by that further, unexpected compliment. Haruka's movement, which stood at attention, caught her attention, then watched the girl reach out to her.

"Do you grant me, Madamoiselle Kaioh, the honor to escort you to the buffet room?" She asked her, assuming a French accent, including the 'r'.

The other tried not to laugh, and raised her chin, an air painted on her face.

"I thought you were busy with the hostesses, Major Tenou."

But that shook her head.

"What can I do with a hostess, when I have the star of the evening at my disposal?" "When would I say I was available to you?" Haruka snorted, bringing her hands to her hips.

"How controversial you are, and I wanted to be kind." And as she said that she turned her heels and went away, leaving behind an amused Kaioh who, after shaking her head, ran after her and took her arm in arm, provoking every kind of protest from the other.

 **Author's notes: wow! I did it, I'm sorry for the absence, two weeks! I have been very busy because of the school, I promise I'll try updating sooner.**

 **I'm glad people are liking this fic, thanks for you support!**

 **Did you understand who is Mitsuo already? Let me know it! Until next time this is Milla23 ;)**


	11. Chapter 11 (07-01 04:08:07)

**I don't own anything but the translation ;)**

By instinct 

_Operation "Iraqi Freedom"_

 _Former Iraqi Army Barracks_

 _Tikrit,_

 _Iraq,_

 _2007_

The military Jeep jumped when, overcoming the wide-open grating that was the access to the old Iraqi army barracks, she found herself on a sandpit not seen by the driver. "Ouch!Fuck! "

Cursed Haruka, then just turning the steering wheel to enter the portion of asphalt that led to the building's front door. She parked between a rickety Chevrolet van and a second US Army Jeep, whose sight only fueled the wrath of Tenou.

She got off the jeep and after having strode across the distance that separated it from the entrance, she found herself in the midst of laborious preparations: numerous volunteers, boys and girls, were intent on clearing the large space that was to have been the meeting hall of the barracks; some took away piles of debris while others were picking up portions of the wall to make the room even wider; a couple of boys were poised on stairs, intent on passing hands of paint.

But the object of Major Tenou's interest gave her back, unaware of the danger, all taken up by trying to detach some wooden planks from a door. Haruka's hand impacted the back of the skull covered with a dark mop in a loud slap, which aroused the surprise of the volunteers who passed by, brooms in hand, not accustomed to the sight of a soldier who beat another.

"I'm sending you to the Martial Court, Banks, I swear to you, one of these days." Richard put both hands on his head, complaining as he turned to face his superior.

"Ouch, Major, what have I done?"

"I have not authorized," she began to count with her fingers, "neither your exit from the field, nor the use of a means of the United States Army."

"I could not find her anywhere, so I asked Sergeant Jeskins." He continued to rub his head with one hand, while with the free one he began to torment the identification plates that hung around his neck, falling on the short sleeve t-shirt of the Army Army. "He signed me the permit." Haruka glared at him. "I authorize your exits, and that's it." "This is despotism, Major."

"You are my translator, I could need you at any moment. Ergo, you must be at my disposal. "

"Major Tenou, do not be so hard on our Richard!" Colleen's voice turned her away from that momentary bickering, and watched the woman approach her.

"He's giving us a big hand, he's practically every day to make this place usable again." Colleen did not notice the signs he was making to silence her, and Tenou's eyes narrowed.

"Everyday?" She asked slowly, turning back to look at Banks, who now scratched his head, staring at his feet, and Colleen realized that she had spoken more than he should. How, after all, it often happened to her.

"Major, I can explain-"

"I was not joking about the Martial Court." But Richard looked at her.

"He will not do it for real." He told her swallowing, trying not to be overwhelmed by that woman who feared - or perhaps more - of a man. Tenou did not answer immediately.

"Maybe not, but I can get you to clean the toilets of the field from here to eternity." Banks opened his eyes, wincing: perhaps the Martial Court was better. They stared at each other for a long moment.

"Samira" Haruka barely walked away, his eyes bothered suddenly, raising Richard's tone of voice. Then she understood that tactic.

"Coward, you get yourself to defend from a woman." But Richard raised his chin, pigeoned, openly challenging her.

"What a big bastard son of a bitch." Haruka shook her head, and could not help but a slight smile curl her lips. In her peripheral vision came a figure dressed in a long tunic, but wearing a military sweatshirt over it with the American flag stitched over it, and he understood why Banks no longer had his own.

"Hello, Major." Samira greeted her, who removed that Western habit, always wore her chador.

"Hi, missy." The girl smiled, and Richard caught his attention.

"You know, Samira, Major Tenou is having a huge tantrum right now." Samira looked confused.

"What is a tantrum?"

"Being furious with someone very, VERY stupid." Haruka uttered those words without taking her eyes off Banks, and the young woman stood between her and the soldier.

"Oh no, Haruka, please, do not be mad at Richard, He's helping us, He's good." Richard looked satisfied, tilting his head. "She's saying I'm good." Haruka looked at them for a moment, frowning. Then she crossed her arms to her chest.

"Oh, you know what, Fuck, both of you, Fuck, Off." Richard laughed, and Samira looked at him.

"What does that mean?"

"That Major Tenou loves us." Colleen drew attention to Samira, who turned away from the two soldiers. "Do not believe it's over, Richard." But that smiled, all pompous for winning that first round.

"Because, because it is here, do not you stay to give us a hand? "

"Are you taking my ass too?" Richard pulled her closer, and lowered his voice.

"But what is it today, menstruation?" Haruka rolled her eyes, and turned away from the boy who wanted to take the exit. "I'm leaving, which is better."

"Do not forget to say goodbye to Samira or it will be bad for us." She took a few more steps, then gave a loud snort and diverted her path, taking for the doorframe without which the young Arab had disappeared, finding her on tiptoe in front of something that looked like a shelving in wood, while trying to grab one of the paint cans on the top shelf.

"Let me help you." She told her after a few moments, during which she observed a series of unsuccessful attempts. Samira was taken by surprise, at first, by presence. Then she shook her head.

"No, I got it."

"Oh no, you do not." Haruka approached her, but she jumped, touching the jar that fell on the shelf, bumping into another. And another. And another: the metal containers rolled off the shelf, and Haruka pushed Samira away, not before trying to grab one of the jars that would otherwise have fallen into her head.

She could not, but at least she took her path.

"Ouch." She murmured, overwhelmed by the noise of those who were falling, while Samira covered her mouth with her hands. "Oh, I'm sorry Ruka. I'm so sorry! What a mess!" Tenou smiled, shrugging.

"It's not a big deal." They bent over to pick up the paint and put it back in place, when an exclamation of horror from Samira stopped Tenou. "Samira, what the hell?" But that did not answer, and she grabbed Haruka's wrist, turning the palm upward and thus revealing two bloody strips at the phalanges of the index and middle fingers of the right hand.

"You hurt yourself!" Samira looked shocked, and Haruka looked at her puzzled. Then she shook her head.

"Samira, it's just a little cut, do not overreact-" she paused when she saw the young woman bring her hand to her lips, and suck off the streams of blood. Haruka was dismayed by the gesture, so intimate on the part of the girl; and when she recovered from the sensation, she tried to pull her hand away.

"That was very unnecessary, Samira." Samira did not listen to her. She stared at the wounds for a few seconds, then shifted her attention to Haruka's face: she watched her for a long moment, and Tenou could see the girl's gaze burning with determination. Burning with desire. The young woman closed her eyes, and after putting her hand on her face let her lips come into contact with those of the military, remaining there for a long moment.

"It's so ... different." Samira murmured once she was detached, more like she was thinking aloud, her fingers touching Tenou's lips.

"Do you feel better now?" Then asked Haruka in a flat tone.

"Do you feel better now that you know how to kiss a woman feel?" Samira looked at her confused.

"Ruka ..." That sighed, shaking her head. "You're very young, Samira, but your eyes have already seen such horrible things ..." she touched her cheek with the back of her hand, and the other tilted her head, losing herself in the sensations of that touch. "You're confused, missy."

"I do not!" The other vehemently replied.

"I know what I feel and I know what I want, Ruka" and "What I want is you." Tenou continued to look at her without emotion. "Do you like me?" She suddenly asked her that one. The question did not completely catch unawares Tenou.

"Answer me, Ruka. Do you like me?"

"I'm fond of you." She answered her after a long moment.

"And I like you, but not in the way you probably would." Samira winced at those words. Then she looked down, and Haruka saw a tear slide down the young woman's cheek.

"You will find your path, missy, and you know I will not be there."

"Why not?"

"Because one day I will leave this country, and I will leave this reckless infatuation will fade away." The girl shook her head, and Haruka took a few steps to bring her closer. "You saved me." Samira's whisper hardly reached her ears, and Tenou hugged her, then kissed her forehead in a more affectionate than passionate gesture. "That's why you do not know what you want, despite what you're saying." She looked for her gaze, lifting her chin with her fingers.

"I like you, I was scared, and you were scared, and I was just like me, when I was around you and I was in the middle of a battlefield."

"You do not look like someone scared." Haruka smiled at her.

"I know that I do not have regrets and you know what I mean?" The girl nodded, then freed herself in a cry, clinging to Tenou's uniform.

"Do not hurt his feelings, Samira." She told her after she had vented, and the young woman including the reference to Richard.

"Because he's very close friend, and I would be very disappointed if you will make him suffer." Samira wiped her eyes, and looked for Tenou's emerald irises.

"You like Richard?"

Haruka laughed.

"Oh dear Lord, no !!" And the reaction tore a smile at Samira. "He's a fucking moron, but he's a brother, missy."She took her by the arms and gently pushed her away, and she finished wiping the tears on the sweatshirt the boy had lent her. Haruka helped her pick up the paint cans, then without saying anything else she turned her back and went out.

x

 _29 May, 2008_

 _Day 40_

She crouched on the bed of her bedroom, the sobs that rattled the small body.

She heard her mother's voice calling her from the hallway, and slipped quickly under the covers, hiding from the parent.

"Haruka, are you here?" She heard the sound of the door sweeping open, and the step of the woman approaching the bed. "How strange, there is not." She tried to stifle a sob, since her mother had not seen her.

"It will mean that I will wait for you sitting on the bed." Oh no.

"Hey, but here's something strange!" She covered her mouth when she felt her mother's hands groping through the blanket.

"Now I'll fix it." She tried in any way not to laugh at the tickle, but she could not and found herself taking air, finding herself in the arms of the woman.

"Oh, here it is!" She said to her, laughing, and only a glance at her swollen red eyes was enough to understand that she had cried.

"Haruka, what's up?" She heard herself ask, and crossed her eyes with the chestnut irises of the other.

"Why are you crying?" She wiped her nose on the sleeve of her shirt, having pulled up noisily, snatching a smile at her mother. "Dad hates me, Mum, is not it?" The woman stroked the face of the eight-year-old girl she was facing, and a slight sigh left her lips as she wore a blonde lock, escaping from the ponytail, behind her ear.

"How did such a thing come to mind?" "Because he's never there!" She almost shouted at her, and a new sob came out of her lips.

"And when he is there he is never with me, and I heard when you had a fight." She saw her start at that sentence, probably rethinking the umpteenth quarrel with Takeshi, to the umpteenth accusations they had exchanged. The anger that she had heard in her voice when her father had called her a 'useless and stupid, whining girl.' Yet she tried in every way not to cry, and if she did not hide her tears, because she knew that Papa did not like it.

Because she knew that Papa would have wanted her stronger.

"Haruka, listen to me." Began to tell her her mother, putting it on her lap.

"Your father is a very strict man, first of all with himself, and he thinks that showing affection is wrong." She looked at her with shining eyes, picking up the woman's smile in response.

"He's a bit like a big bear, you know, who does not seem to love his cubs very much, but in the end he's defending them from danger." The words did not convince her. "Maybe he's right, I'm useless and stupid." But the woman snapped her lips, expressing her disappointment.

"Never say something like that again." She scolded her, holding her close to her chest. " _You are the most beautiful star in my sky, Haruka."_ She murmured in her ear.

" _You are my light, baby._ "

" _Then at least you love me_?" Churches, starting to feel consoled in her mother's affectionate embrace, and she hugged her harder.

" _You must never doubt this, Haruka. Never."_ They stood in silence for a long moment, then the woman started talking again.

"Are we going to get an ice cream from Tommy?"

"But you must try!" She objected, and the other shrugged.

"It does not matter, there's still time for the concert, and I'd rather eat a nice ice cream with you." A smile spread across her face, and her mother let her get out of bed, looking her up and down when the child was in front of her.

"You will become as tall as your father, Haruka, if you keep growing like that." But Haruka grimaced in disgust, snatching a laugh at her mother.

Her eyes widened, and as she sat down she realized she had fallen asleep on the couch. The TV still postponed the video game images, stopped on the ' _Game Over'_ screen, and the request to continue or return to the initial menu.

Her neck ached and he rubbed the back of her head as she put down the controller - which had been left on her abdomen for a moment before - on the low table in front of her.

She ran her other hand through her hair, ruffling it, and cleared her throat with a cough.

 _You are the most beautiful star in my sky_. She had forgotten that particular phrase her mother used to repeat often.

How strange, she thought, coming back to the words that Michiru had addressed to her earlier.

' _Let's turn into a supernova'_.

She closed her eyes, trying to drive away those phrases from her mind: she did not shine, she was not light, although everyone seemed to support the opposite. She just destroyed.

And she tried to get Michiru off her head, which was getting rather difficult lately. Why had she been so comfortable with another living being with consciousness, except for two, maybe three, whose only problem was, at the moment, the status of a corpse. And the well-being of having the doctor close - because he could listen to it, and encourage it, now it was added - or perhaps, latent, there had always been - a purely physical component.

That she had decided to annihilate by throwing herself headlong into adventures of a night, in purely carnal outpourings which, she hoped, would sooner or later cloud have stopped the attraction she had begun to have for her psychologist.

I _t's your doctor, Haruka._

 _Do not bullshit._

She got up and turned off the Playstation, then looked at the phone at the time: it was six in the morning.He peered out the window, losing her gaze in the clear sky at the end of May. She decided to take a shower and thought that if she had found little traffic, in about three hours she would reach Washington.

x

 _Military Hospital "Edward Dewenish VA Medical Centre"_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _1 June 2008_

 _Day 43_

The first thing she noticed, as soon as she entered her office, was the bouquet of red roses on her desk.

For a moment she wondered if a certain person had nothing to do with that unexpected gift, but immediately dismissed the absurd idea.

Although the absence of each ticket could also make her believe in an improbable impetus from Tenou.

"Michiru you have a - wow." Mamoru paused, noticing the roses, when he appeared in the office.

"Who sends you?"

"I do not know." It was the other, tilting his head. Mamoru became thoughtful.

"It's not that..." Michiru laughed, interpreting his friend's thoughts.

"You see, you see, who's going to buy me roses?" Mamoru thought about it for a moment, then a smile curled his lips. "Actually no, but you never know."

"If I have to be honest, I think they're from Samuel." As she had promised, Foster had not yet surrendered despite the fairly obvious two of spades she had trimmed, which was followed by a period of relative quiet. Chiba smelled the roses, then turned to his friend.

"He's still attached to your ribs, huh?" "Apparently, what did you say when you came in?" She tried to misdirect the conversation, and Mamoru put his hands in his pockets.

"Let's go to my office, I'd like to talk to you about a couple of things." The girl followed him to the last door at the back, and once inside sat down at the desk, imitated by Chiba.

"Since Haruka has been discharged," the doctor began, "she has not come to the hospital." Here we are, thought Michiru, sighing.

"No, it's true, but therapy is still going on, Mamoru."

"Where is she today, for example?"

"She went a few days to Washington." She informed him.

"I do not really know what to do, but we had a long talk about his parents a few days ago, and I think the two things are connected."

She recalled what she had told her about her father, and the pictures of the Opera House, where Emily Woodsbridge had come back to life for a few minutes in their speeches: now Haruka talked to her, and a lot too.

She still had her moments of indecision, as if he still had to evaluate how much she could trust her, and the degree of exposure deriving from her revelations, but it opened up to her. Every day she let her access a piece of her psyche and, in so doing, to fragments of her life.

"Well, I began to suffer veiled pressure from the administration." Mamoru declared to her, and the other was not astonished. "Your contract is valid for another two months, but you know the situation of the Hospital, Michiru." We do not sail in the gold and the high floors begin to wonder why they should continue to pay you. " Michiru nodded, fully understanding the situation. "I'm trying to mediate, but I do not know how long I'll be able to do it."

"I do not want you getting into trouble, Mamoru." She remained silent, before resuming.

"I talked to her, I told her that if she does not come, she will have problems, but it seems to me that I do not touch her too much, although I can say with certainty that she values our friendship. " Mamoru thought for a moment, then put his hands together on the desk.

"Listen, Michiru, I do not doubt that you are doing a great job with Tenou, but I have to give concrete things to the administration, and I do not need to know your intentions, so I ask you: what do you want to do? ? " The girl was absorbed, thinking about how much she did not want to accept this job initially, and believed that four months would be a useless waste of time.

Now instead she had found the desire to continue, and perhaps she had to thank her stubborn, charming patient.

"I would like to stay, Mamoru, I would like to continue working at Dewenish." Chiba smiled.

"So I'll have to give you more patients, besides Haruka, so I'll be able to reassure the tall poppies."

"Haruka is not yet fully recovered," Michiru told him.

"I still have gaps I can not fill."

"I know, and in any case I will delay, before giving you new cases." Mamoru reassured her.

"In any case, I do not think having other patients will prevent you from seeing her." Michiru could not swear, but it seemed to her that there was a certain irony in the tone of her friend.

She inclined her head, and she scribbled something on a sheet of the Dewenish, which she then put aside, on a pile of other equal.

"Do you want to come to dinner with us, one of these nights?" Mamoru returned to tell her, distracting her from his thoughts. "It's been a while since we've been organized and Usako still feels guilty for letting us escape like this after the concert."

Michiru smiled, coming back to mind on Memorial Day's evening, when she entered the Buffet Room on Haruka's arm and convinced her to help her find the couple, unsuccessfully. She then learned that Usagi had drunk a couple of glasses of alcohol, believing it to be fruit juice, and she, who had a zero alcohol tolerance, she had collapsed in no time.

She was giving her consent when someone knocked on the door and a young trainee entered the office at Mamoru's invitation, requesting his intervention in Room 6.

They came out of the room together, Michiru intending to return to her office, when a thought struck her as they walked down the corridor.

"Mamoru, can I bring Haruka with me?" The doctor stopped, just a few steps from the room on whose door the name 'Kaioh' stood, looking at her perplexed. Michiru interpreted the indecision, and hastened to add.

"Haruka needs to socialize, as I explained, she must-"

"-to dive into normal life contexts, I know." "And what's better than getting Haruka to have a chat with Usagi, then?" Mamoru smiled at her; a slight sigh left his lips, a single doubt to curb an affirmative answer. "Should I worry about Chibiusa?"

"Oh no, absolutely Mamoru, I can guarantee you." She told him vehemently. "When he met Hotaru it went well, although I have to admit that she does not seem totally comfortable with the children."

She added after a pause, and Chiba tilted his head.

"All I need to know is that with Hotaru there has been a good interaction."

Michiru nodded, smiling, and followed her friend for a moment when she was dismissed.

But when he entered her office, she almost got a shock.

"Samuel!" She called, putting a hand to her chest, while the other moved away from the flowers.

"You scared me."

"Excuse me," was Foster, approaching her. "Did you like roses?" That sentence confirmed her theory.

"They are very beautiful, Samuel, but I do not think that-"

"I told you, I'm not a guy who just gives up." Above all,

"he stepped in front of her, putting his hands in his pockets. Michiru stepped back half instinctively.

"When I realize I have to throw myself into the fray and clash."

"There is no clash, Samuel, I have already clarified my point of view."

"It's for him, is not it?" The girl answered that question with a puzzled look.

"Tenou, you like that unbalanced marmorone, that's why you put me at the door." Michiru did not tolerate the contempt with which Samuel had turned to Haruka, and stepping aside, she freed herself from Foster's marking, reaching her desk.

"Major Tenou is not unbalanced, Samuel, I would ask you to bring respect, since he is not even here and can not answer you." As you deserve, she added mentally.

"Mm-mh." He agreed to the other, turning to look at her.

"And then, help me understand Michiru, you and I can not go out because, in your own words, you can not let anyone go into Hotaru's life, but," he took a few steps closer.

"It's okay if between that and Hotaru 'there was a good interaction." Michiru's eyes widened, wincing as he heard the same sentence said earlier by Mamoru.

"You dismiss me by encamping Hotaru as an excuse, but then you let the little girl meet a madman who nearly killed two people in Virginia Beach, and God only knows what the hell he did in Iraq to get that way."

"I do not owe you an explanation, Samuel." She froze with her eyes, coming back to him and planting the celestial irises on the gray ones of the other.

"And what will Dr. Chiba say when he knows he spies our conversations?"

"I do not spell anything, it's not my fault if you talk about your own affairs in the corridor."

"But nobody, I think, has authorized you to enter my office." Samuel did not break eye contact and approached Michiru, forcing her to hit the edge of the desk.

"When this cross-nurse syndrome passes you, and Tenou will give you the sack after you have duped and even fucked him, I do not know if I will be willing to pick up the pieces."

"Who says you we have not already been in bed, and that we do not keep doing it, Samuel?" She could not help challenging him, pointing her hands to his chest. Foster frowned, and Michiru saw a flash of surprise cross his eyes. Then the doctor smiled.

"No, I do not think so, but I'm sure Tenou will use you, and when you realize it, it will be too late." Samuel approached again.

"I'm not like him, Michiru."

"I really like you, and if you just opened up your heart, you would understand it, so I'm not going to give up."

"I'm not a trophy to win, Samuel." She told him hard.

"And maybe your problem is that you're not Haruka." Foster looked at her for a long moment, then shook his head, smiling. "What a great transfer, Dr. Kaioh, Freud would be proud of it, but I think it was Sabine Spielrein who fell in love with Dr. Jung, not the other way around." He told her, looking at her, then whistling out of the office. Michiru stood for a few moments, then opened the dustbin under the desk and, without thinking twice, she threw the roses inside.

x

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _2 June 2008_

 _Day 44_

Michiru crossed the long corridor of the entrance to the nursery school, and entered the third door on the left, having a full view of the room animated by children's colors and voices, the walls covered with drawings and posters, the low tables covered with buildings and games of all types.

"Hotaru look, your mother has arrived." Called her the teacher, a young woman in her thirties, who then turned to Michiru.

"Hi, Dr. Kaioh." Michiru smiled at her, returning the greeting, as Hotaru ran to meet her and she lifted her up.

"Hi Angel!" The girl covered her with kisses, arousing the girl's laughter.

"How did it go today?"

"I made a drawing!" The little girl struggled a bit 'and Michiru let her down, watching her then run to one of the tables while the teacher handed her the briefcase of the snack and the jacket of Hotaru.

"Look!!" Michiru took the paper, and taking Hotaru by the hand he left the class: the drawing was a rather unsettled set of lines and oblong figures.

"It's very beautiful." She then encouraged. "It's me and you, and a dog." Hotaru explained, hopping, and Michiru smiled at the girl's attempt to propose the purchase of a sweet quadruped.

"Honey, we do not have a dog and probably never will."

"But I want a dog." It was the child, whining. Michiru was beginning to explain to her how impossible it was for them to handle an animal, when the girl's attention was recalled by a ringing female voice.

"Hey, hello Margaret." She said stopping, waving goodbye to the young woman who was approaching her holding a blond-haired girl by the hand.

"Michiru, I was looking for you." The girl looked surprised.

"Oh, what's up?" But that smiled, bringing a hand through her long brown hair, arranging them backwards.

"Nothing serious, we are organizing the meeting at the end of the year, to get some ideas for the usual fundraising .This year there is to make the roof fix, and we thought to contribute to the creation of a Multimedia Room, with a dozen of computers. "

Michiru listened attentively, as Hotaru freed herself from her grasp and began to run down the corridor with the other child: she had forgotten that Margaret Reilly was also the President of the representative parents, who every year organized small parties to celebrate the year just concluded but also put together the sum necessary for initiatives in favor of the school. The vegetable garden at the back of the building - obtained after the redevelopment of the area - was the initiative of the previous year, they had told it.

And even if the public relations with the other mothers was not something to which he was completely accustomed - thanks to the lack of time, it was something that every now and then became necessary. And, all in all, it was also fun.

"It sounds very interesting," she said sincerely, and the other nodded.

"And it is, but we start with a base budget of three thousand dollars, maybe something more."

"What's three thousand dollars for?" Both girls turned to look at the redhead approaching with a small carrot ball in her arms.

"Hey Michiru! But where were you?" The young woman smiled.

"I started working again, Alice, but Margaret was just telling me about fundraising ..." The woman nodded and resumed to talk about the ideas and projects for the collection of that year, and after a few minutes Michiru heard the trill of the phone make her bag vibrate.

She frowned at the sight of the hidden ID, but answered anyway.

' _Tell me how you are dressed.'_ Michiru did not answer, perplexed.

She unplugged the phone from her ear to look back at the display, as if the intentions of the mysterious interlocutor could be revealed in the small bright monitor.

She put the phone back to her ear, intending to close the conversation with a ' _Sorry, wrong number_ ', but the voice beat it on time.

' _Come on, it's not difficult. Tell me how you are dressed._ ' The realization struck her, and she could not help smiling.

She said goodbye to the other two women, who had been watching all her movements, and after telling Hotaru not to go out and not get into trouble, making sure that Margaret had a look at her, took a few steps to get out of the hearing range of the other .

Action that brought her to the edge of the entrance door of the kindergarten.

"Let's see, what would you do if I told you I do not have clothes?" She heard a slight laugh, and then a short sigh.

'Liar. You're in a public place and you're not the type of obscene acts. "

Michiru frowned, wondering how Haruka knew where she was.

She thought she heard the voices of the children or of Margaret and Alice.

' _Then let me guess._ '

She heard her continue, thoughtfully.

' _In my opinion, you wear the light blue shirt, which if you know well, please unbutton on the first two buttons. Above you, uh, that slightly beige cardigan that falls softly on your hips. IS...'_ Michiru was thrilled, from the moment that Tenou was guessing exactly every piece of clothing. '... _and you also have a beige skirt, with a slightly lighter shade than the cardigan. To conclude the usual décolleté with the heel_... 'The girl had stopped listening to her, and now she was looking with her eyes on the driveway and on the side of the road traces that could be traced back to her patient.

In fact, she sat on the bike, on the other side of the driveway, and could clearly see her laughing as she spoke on the phone.

She shook her head and closed the communication, then came back inside and called Hotaru.

"Hotaru let's go! Come and see who's there." The girl stopped curious at that statement, and reached it running, then taking her hand.

Michiru quickly greeted the two women - whose curiosity was the same as that of the child - and started towards the road, in the direction of Haruka.

"It's Haruka!" Hotaru exclaimed when she recognized the figure on the motorcycle. Haruka put the phone back in the front pocket of her jacket, then leaning against the helmet on the tank in the gesture she used to do, she leaned slightly towards the child.

"Hello wren."

"What's a little bit?" Tenou thought for a moment. "It's a small and ugly business." "I'm not ugly, not even small." Hotaru pouted, and Michiru stroked her head.

"No, you're not, Hotaru, why do not you try to kiss Haruka, maybe a frog comes back prince."

"And lose my fabulous green and slippery skin? You do not talk about it." It was Haruka, a sustained air painted on her face. "What are you doing here?" Haruka shrugged.

"I was passing by here, and given the time I thought about stopping and seeing if you were there." Michiru wondered if Haruka had actually passed by accidentally or not, while Hotaru was starting to wave a drawing sheet in the air, in the direction of the girl. "Look at my drawing!" Tenou took off her gloves and took the work in her hand. "What's this?"

"It's me and Hotaru," explained Michiru. "It's a dog."

"Where would the dog be?" Perplexed churches, and Michiru approached her, pointing to a square brown shape in the corner of the paper.

"Um, he must have had a bad accident, this poor beast." She said seriously, pulling a smile to Michiru as Hotaru began to touch the side of the bike.

"I've never had a dog." She then said, after a few moments absorbed.

"But I had a hamster once, for two weeks." "Two weeks?" Michiru was curious.

"What happened to him?" Haruka tilted her head.

"Trust me, you do not want to know, I can tell you that a washing machine is involved." Michiru shook her head, laughing, covering her eyes with her hands, and Haruka returned to look at Hotaru.

"Do you like my bike?" She suddenly asked her, and the little girl nodded, hopping against the hull.

And Tenou surprised everyone, first herself, taking Hotaru's shoulders and resting her on the seat in front of her.

"Amazing, uh?" Hotaru touched the helmet in front of her, and Haruka took it off, holding it to a still surprised Michiru.

"Keep it a second." Then, seeing the little girl reaching for the handlebars, she moved her forward, over the tank, until her chunky hands could not tighten the knobs.

"Uoh, we have a talent here."

Joked Haruka, while Michiru looked at her, looking at her. And the other noticed it.

"Do I have something in my face?" She asked her, with Hotaru in the background that was 'bruuuum'.

"No," the girl answered in a smile.

"It's that you gave me the impression that you did not like children."

"And in fact I do not like them," she revealed sincerely.

"They are annoying, they cry, scream and dirty." She went on undeterred.

"But then it happens to find a girl with such good taste and then ..." "Mom look!" Exclaimed Hotaru, continuing to make verses with her mouth, and Michiru saw Haruka's lips bend upwards, while she felt a strange sensation rising up from a corner of her mind, to the image of Hotaru and Haruka together.

"How was your trip to Washington?" She preferred to ask, to avoid thinking. Haruka shrugged.

"Normal."

"Did you go to your father?" The other inclined her head.

"Ah-ah, nice joke."

"So where have you been?" Tenou did not answer.

"I was in the old house, I took a few things." She then said to her, after a moment.

"And I went to my mother." Michiru had imagined it.

"How are you?" Haruka then asked her, and she avoided telling her about the scuffiness with Samuel.

"Mamoru will assign me new patients." The other frowned.

"Hey, if you're my doctor, you can not have other patients."

"I told you to come to the hospital, but you, nothing."

"What balls." Hushed Haruka, and Hotaru laughed.

" _What balls!_ " She repeated the baby, and this time it was Haruka's turn to laugh, while Michiru put her hands on her hips. "Fantastic, you've been here for two minutes and already have a negative influence on it."

"If you want, I'll teach you others, doc."

"Oh no, gladly, get it off this bike instead." Haruka laughed, taking Hotaru by the hips, but that didn't seem to make the job easier.

She protested loudly, clinging with all her strength to the knobs of Suzuki.

"Not like that or you break them, wren." She told her, pulling her slightly, and the confusion created by Hotaru did not make her aware of the woman behind Michiru, who was trying to get the doctor's attention.

"Michiru, Michiru, I'm sorry ..." The girl turned, crossing Margaret's gaze.

"Forgive the trouble, but I wanted to ask you if we can then count on you for fundraising." Then zhe glanced at Haruka. "Hello!" Michiru realized that not far away were Alice and another pair of Hotaru-class mothers, who had probably observed all the interaction between her and the mysterious centaur, and had decided to send Margaret forward: she understood in that instant, to have become the last, cool gossip to discuss at the park.

"I'm Margaret Reilly." Haruka finally succeeded in putting Hotaru on the ground, provoking jealous protests, and hinted at a quick military salute.

"Major Tenou Haruka, pleasure."

"Oh, he's a soldier?" Margaret inquired curiously, and Michiru intervened.

"The Major is a patient of mine." She explained, and the other gave her a look as if to say ' _yes, of course, and I believe it_ '. "Well now I really have to go in. We'll see you soon, Michiru, and thank you for your cooperation!" Both Haruka and Michiru watched Margaret move away with her daughter in her arms, then Haruka took the helmet from Michiru's hands and put it on the head, fitting it up to half of the forehead.

"Um, it will be better for me to go in. Probably that little group over there will already be wondering if I'm Hotaru's new dad." The girl just blushed at that sentence, and lifting Hotaru in her arms she remembered the information she had to give to the other.

"Before I go, I want to inform you that you have an invitation to dinner." Haruka raised an eyebrow.

"And with whom?"

"With me."

"I do not come to dinner with you." She told her with a sustained air, and Michiru smiled. "Thursday, let's go to Mamoru."

"From Dr. Chiba?" That was perplexed. "Let's go to Chibiusa, mom?" Hotaru asked, who nodded. And Haruka hastened to ask, "Has a daughter also Chiba, right?" In the affirmative answer of the other, Haruka snorted.

"Fantastic, I, you, the Chiba family and two marmots."

"Thanks Michiru, you really had a phenomenal idea."

"But you must know Usagi, Haruka." She communicated in a smile.

"Usagi would be Chiba's wife?"

"Exactly, the greatest champion of sociability I know," the doctor joked, causing a moan in the other. "You need to be in contact with people like that." In response, Haruka put on the helmet and fastened it, then started the bike.

"Thursday, did you say?" Michiru nodded. "At eight o'clock we can go together, if you want."

"Nah. You'll explain how to get there." And as she said that she entered the road, followed by Michiru's gaze and Hotaru waving, waving her hand in the air.

x

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _4 June 2008_

 _Day 46_

She inserted the key into the lock, while beyond the door she heard Haruka's voice, several decibels above a normal tone, shouting insults and anathemas.

" _You son of a bitch damn! I'll kill you_!" She rolled her eyes, smacking her lips, and opening the door she made eye contact with the long figure of Tenou standing on the leather couch, controller in hand, all set to swear at the television in front of her who postponed the virtual images , but rather realistic, of two decidedly muscular dudes who gave them their best.

"I'll make that thing disappear sooner or later, it stimulates aggression, and you do not really need it." Tenou did not even answer, and he dropped onto the couch, assuming a sitting position.

" _You're a shit, Kazuya Mishima, a real shit_." "Stop it, Haruka." Michiru reproached her, before putting the bag on the dining table and disappearing into the kitchen, casting a distracted look at the numerous letters scattered over it.

Which, she noted, was also placed in a different position than usual, more attached to the wall in the kitchen, to leave a large space between the entrance and the wall with the window.

"Still that Tolkien?" She asked her back with a glass of water in her hand that he began to sip.

"Tekken, it's called Tekken." She got up and turned off the Playstation, throwing the controller on the other sofa.

"What is it, what's all this mail?" Haruka approached her, moving a few envelopes with her fingertips.

"Some arrears are coming in. But most of it is rubbish." Michiru took another sip of water.

"You have to buy some green tea."

"And you must stop mastering my house." Tenou folded her arms, bending slightly toward the girl.

"I thought you liked my authoritarian work." She said arching an eyebrow, taking on a soothing tone. Haruka frowned, then smiled. "Forget it, Doc. You can not do the _femme fatale."_ Michiru laughed, and sitting down at the table she began to search through the mail.

"How did you move it?"

"I made a new purchase, they bring it to me for days, and I thought I'd use this space." The girl put her elbows to the polished surface, resting her chin on her hands and staring at Haruka, standing on the other side of the table.

"What have you bought?"

"Curiosity killed the cat."

"I'm not a cat." Michiru retorted in a smile. "Maybe not, but you're a nosy anyway." Michiru watched Haruka go to the kitchen and come back with a bottle of water in her hand, to which she attached herself.

"I saw Becky, in the hospital." She told her when she was back in range, getting a surprised expression in response. "She was worried, she did not know you were discharged, I told her she can come see you whenever she wants."

Haruka swallowed the last sip.

"Can you finish organizing my social life?" "If it were not for me to create you some diversion, you would get yourself off with that cabbage Playstation, in fact you should thank me."Tenou grunted her disappointment, scratching her head.

"What do we cook for lunch?" Michiru's question gathered an obvious dismay.

"But you're a nightmare! Do not you just have to go to Chiba together tonight, do you want to plant here for lunch?" But Michiru smiled, crumpling some letters that had turned out to be pure and simple publicity.

"Come on, I'll prepare something for you."

"I do not want to go back to Dewenish with food poisoning, doc." Then she pouted, while the other shook her head.

"Wait, or maybe it's a tactic, just to recover me again."

"For your information, I'm a great cook, but if you continue, I'll put rat poison in your lunch." Michiru challenged her, getting up from the table to go and throw away the waste paper. And it was then that she noticed an envelope in fine paper with printed name and grade of Haruka, and in one corner two symbols, one of which was the US Army crest.

"What is this?" She asked her, coming back from the kitchen, picking up the envelope. "It sounds like an invitation." Haruka shrugged.

"I have no idea, she arrived with this morning's correspondence."

"Can I open it?"

"As if I could stop you from doing my own business."

"In fact you can not." Michiru smiled at her, opening the envelope and revealing a letter with the heading of the Four Seasons Hotel. "As you wanted to prove, it's an invitation." Haruka approached her, and peered the letter from behind the other's shoulders: Michiru felt Haruka's face not far from her own, and did not move, enjoying that close proximity.

"A gala evening?"

"Here it is written that it is in honor of the veterans of Iraq, and that the Senator of Virginia will deliver honors to the deserving, for holding high the honor of the homeland." Haruka snapped her lips, moving away.

"I'm anything but worthy." Michiru lowered the paper, turning to look at Haruka. "There's my father's hand, I'm sure."

"I think you should go instead."

"I do not want to spend the evening with snooty white-collar workers whose days consisted of golf matches while I could end up in a dead body at any time, and now want to cleanse my conscience by giving me a prize."

She could clearly see Haruka's mood alter, and Michiru did not insist, putting the invitation back in her place.

"Okay, you do not have to do it if you do not want to." The girl approached her, placing a hand on her arm.

"But you can meet other guys like you, talk to them, it's an excellent opportunity to compare yourself with those who have had your own experiences" Haruka scratched her head, bored.

"Bah, I do not know." Michiru smiled, then walked into the kitchen, and opened the refrigerator.

"So, what do you want to eat?" Tenou grabbed one of the island's tall chairs, perched on it.

"You do not really want to go, are you?" The other one did not even answer, and placed a variety of vegetables on the shelf next to the sink; then she looked for a cutting board in several doors, and once she found it she began to chop carrots over it.

"Do you already have new patients?" The question surprised Michiru, who shrugged.

"Not yet, why do you ask?" Haruka stretched her arms over her head.

"So. There's no particular reason." A smile curled the lips of the doctor, who turned to look at the other, without interrupting the shredding.

"Having other patients does not mean I'll give you less time," she reassured her, but Haruka laughed.

"I really hoped otherwise." Michiru shook her head, smiling. Then a twinge of pain spread from one of the fingers of her left hand, and she suddenly left the knife that fell with a 'thud' on the cutting board.

"Ouch. Ouch!" Haruka looked at her puzzled.

"What did you do, now?" She asked, leaning toward her:

Michiru held her hand, looking at the left middle which had a cut with small drops of blood.

"See, you've distracted me, and here's the result.

She broke off and let an ill-concealed wonder open her eyes when Tenou grabbed her wrist and put her finger to her lips, sucking the blood away. They stood there like that for a moment that seemed endless to Michiru, as she felt her cheeks blaze.

Then Haruka broke away, and in the dismay that surfaced in her eyes, after looking alternately at first her and then again her hand, Michiru realized the full realization of the gesture by the other. "-plaster." Haruka left her in a quick instant, and looked for the doctor's eyes.

"Excuse me, it was instinctive." She almost said to her, murmuring, moving away.

"I'll get you a patch." She disappeared beyond the door, and she heard her ask her something about the disinfectant. But Michiru could not record anything but the feeling of Haruka's lips on her hand.

x

Mamoru avoided by a breath Hotaru and Chibiusa who were chasing each other between the corridor and the living room, and lifting the two appetizer platters over his head reached the table set for six, placing them in the middle.

"The wine where do I put it?" Michiru asked, raising towards his friend two bottles of Italian red wine that she had bought in her trusted Wine Bar. Mamoru nodded vaguely to the table. "Put it where you want." The girl placed the wine, then glanced at the appetizers, smelled the smell of roast coming from the kitchen and thinking about everything that Usagi had cooked, she sighed.

"Mamoru, I think your wife has a little exaggerated." Mamoru scratched his head.

"You know what it's like." At the idea of another guest, she was afraid that dinner was not enough for everyone. " Michiru smiled. Then zhe thought a second.

"Usagi kn ...?" The other nodded.

"I explained the situation a little bit, this afternoon." They heard a dull thud come from the corridor, and immediately after Hotaru's voice.

"It was Chibiusa, mum !!"

"It's not true!" It was another ringing little voice, and Mamoru laughed. "You'd better check on what those two are doing." The man took a few steps, and at the same time someone rang at the door of the Chiba family house. "Honey, they played!" Called a voice from the kitchen, which she then added in a lower tone.

"But is this meat so dark or did I burn it?"

"It must be Haruka, I'll go." Michiru offered herself, and no one objected: she was now moving around the house of her friends as if it were her own.

She opened the door wide, and she saw the waiting Haruka figure from the mosquito net.

"Hello." She greeted her with a smile after opening the other door too, and Haruka looked at her puzzled.

"Did I have a wrong house?"

"I opened because I'm busy. She stepped aside, letting in the girl, wearing jeans and a gray hooded sweatshirt, over which she had put on a black jacket.

"How's your finger?" Michiru instinctively touched the phalanx covered by the patch, and repressed in a corner all the feelings that the wound was carrying.

"It's better already, thank you, and anyway it's just a scratch," she told her, and the other nodded: the appearance of Mamoru in the hallway drew her from the embarrassment.

"Good evening, Dr. Chiba." Haruka greeted him, then glancing at the pink-haired little girl who was combed in two funny pigtails, which she supposed was her daughter, and at Hotaru, who was holding his hand.

"I would say you can start calling me Mamoru, Major." Haruka nodded.

"The same is true for you, then." She told him, and Chiba smiled, then turning her attention to the child. "Chibiusa, do not be rude and say hello to Major Tenou." A broad smile was painted on her face.

"Hello!" She almost shouted, raising her arms in the air, and both Michiru and Haruka smiled.

"Hi Haruka!" Exclaimed Hotaru, finding them in front of her, and Haruka leaned towards the child.

"Hi dwarf."

"Do you have the bike?" Haruka shook her head.

"Not tonight." Hotaru looked disappointed, and Michiru picked her up, giving her a kiss, then the child wriggled and made Chibiusa, and the two girls started running around the house.

Mamoru made to invite Haruka to sit down, when everyone's attention was attracted by a figure who rushed out of the kitchen.

"Here I am! Sorry, I'm really rude!" Tenou looked at the young woman, with her long blond hair arranged even in two pigtails at the top of her head, approaching her, wiping her hands on a canvas: she had two sparkling blue eyes and a smile on her face. She seemed very happy.

"Hi, I'm Usagi!" She accompanied the words with her outstretched hand, and when Haruka approached her she grabbed her with both hands and squeezed it tightly, bringing her up and down.

"It's nice to meet you, Major Tenou." Haruka did not know how to deal with such sudden, unjustified expansiveness, and both Michiru and Mamoru smiled in the puzzled face of Tenou. She decided to go for the attitude in which he was a teacher. "And if I had known that Dr. Chiba has such a charming wife, I would not have thought too much about accepting this invitation, madam." Usagi blushed, putting a hand on her face.

"Lady to whom, call me Usagi!" Then she nudged Mamoru.

"Did you hear, Mamoru, she said, ' _a wife so charming'._ " Chiba rolled his eyes, and Michiru smiled. Then the girl stopped, and began to observe Tenou attentively for a long moment.

"It's incredible." She said after a few moments. Haruka raised an eyebrow. "You look like a boy, but looking carefully, you understand."

"What?"

"That you are a woman." Usagi did not stop smiling.

"And also really beautiful ... Now I understand why Michiru behaves like an adolescent overexcited since she arrived-"

"Are we going to sit down?" Michiru herself intervened, interrupting her, and Mamoru interrupted his wife.

. "Honey, the roast ..."

"Oh, right ... Haruka, do you like it well cooked? I had some problems with the oven."

"Usako is a cook with a particular style." Joked Mamoru, and the girl hit him on the chest.

"Do not make fun of me! And be honest, I've improved!" Usagi disappeared into the kitchen, followed by Mamoru. Left alone, Haruka looked for Michiru's gaze.

"It's a candid camera, is not it?" Michiru inclined her head.

"You are welcome?"

"Come on, it looks like it came out of a cartoon, it can not be true, it's a joke or something like that, uh?" The girl laughed, and placing her hand on Haruka's back, she invited her to walk towards the living room. "I told you that you had to meet Usagi, Haruka."

"So that's it, is not it doing us?" Michiru denied his head, and they sat at the table, exchanging a glance.

"Now it's not bad, but until a few years ago eating the dishes cooked by Usako was a real act of love." Mamoru placed the roast tray on a trolley next to the table, resuming the lines of the discourse they had interrupted. Usagi entered with a salad bowl in one hand and a tray of vegetables in the other, calling Chibiusa out loud.

"How bad you are, Mamo-chan, do not believe her Haruka!" The nickname aroused the curiosity of Tenou.

"Mamo-chan?"

"Chan is an honorific suffix that, in Japan, is used among people with a certain degree of intimacy." Michiru explained to her, and Usagi nodded.

"My parents have always been decidedly traditionalists, although they have always lived here in the United States, and I occasionally use the honors too, but it is quite rare." Then she stroked her husband's face.

"Only with my Mamoru." The man smiled, then turned to Haruka.

"Of course it's strange that you do not know."

"My father never spoke Japanese, at least in my presence, and I never met my grandparents, those who started everything, coming here in the 1940s." She added ironically.

"And your mother?" Usagi inquired, and Tenou shook her head.

"She was American." A loud noise drew their attention, and they saw a milk-white splinter pass, which disappeared under the sofa, pursued by Chibiusa and Hotaru.

"Little girls, it's ready!" Michiru called her back, and Usagi laughed.

"Haruka, if you could see it, that was our cat Artemis." "You're not the only one in here who does not get along with the kids." Kaioh told her, and Haruka's lips leaned up. "Strange name for a cat." Usagi shrugged. "Oh, well, I would have called him Fuffi, Pallino, or things like that, but my Mamo-chan is so cerebral!" Mamoru coughed, embarrassed, and Haruka tried to hold back a laugh.

And then the mentally disturbed one would be me, she thought.

"Mom, can I stay near Haruka?" Hotaru asked, pulling Michiru by the sleeve of the white t-shirt.

"Look, then I'll steal all the things from the pot." Admonished Tenou, and the girl pointed her feet.

"But I'm hungry." "Your problem." Michiru rolled her eyes, and convinced Hotaru to sit close to her, promising that she might be sitting next to Haruka for ice cream. And neither Tenou nor the other realized the careful analysis of which they were the object of Mamoru and his wife.

x

Michiru posed as warmly as possible in the car seat, taking care not to wake her, while Haruka held her Lexus door open, in the driveway facing the Chiba house.

"So, I think you survived." Michiru joked, once she had secured the girl with the straps.

Haruka shrugged, leaning against the side of the SUV.

"Well, that Usagi is really something, she's exaggerated, she's chaotic, she's naive as a child, when you get in."

She thought a second, before she started talking again.

"You know doc, I envy her a little." Michiru smiled.

"Usagi is lovely, and Mamoru, too, although he always remains a little stuck in his attitudes, but both have a very big heart." She sighed in the dark.

"They were very close to me when ..." she did not finish the sentence, but Haruka understood very well.

"When I needed it." She merely told her, and the other nodded.

She bent her head back, leaning against the car, and looked for a moment at the sky above them.

"What was that thing of _the over-excited teenager_?" Michiru could not see her well in the face, but swore that Tenou was laughing under her mustache.

She thanked the darkness that hid the brightest color of her cheeks.

"I was afraid to go back and not come, so I was a little nervous, I would have felt sorry, even in the light of all the food cooked by Usagi." At that phrase Haruka groaned, putting a hand on her stomach.

"Do not let me think again, she stuffed me up to be sick, she did nothing but tell me how thin I am, and that you think I'm underweight." Michiru laughed at the memory of the scene between Haruka and Usagi, and the other moaned again.

"I think I'll go somewhere to drink something, to help digestion." The girl cocked her head.

"Do not overdo it."

"You want to come?" Tenou proposed, and Michiru put a finger to her chin, pretending to be thoughtful.

"Sure! And, let's see, we could leave Hotaru asleep in the car, in the parking lot of the bar." A slight smile bent Haruka's lips.

"I would not call social workers, do not worry, I know you're a good mother." The statement displaced Michiru, coming as unexpected as all the few compliments she had received from the other.

"Well then, good evening, and drink a little, and do not be late." Haruka rolled her eyes at all those recommendations. Michiru pointed to the Viper.

"Go slow, oh, and have fun." Haruka read between the lines of that wish, and could not help but laugh.

"What, now you're going to get me a lecture on safe sex?"

"I do not think you need it." Michiru pointed out, and Tenou did not know whether to take it as a compliment or not.

"You know, when you gave me the keys to your house, I was not too convinced at first."

"I would not have forced you to ram, doc. And you know that." But Michiru smiled.

"It's not because of that, it's because I did not know what I could find, if I had fallen in the morning." Tenou raised an eyebrow, then realized, and snapped her lips in disappointment.

"You'll never find anything, doc." She told her then.

"I'm not bringing anyone to my house, and it will never happen."

"You can not say that, sooner or later you'll meet someone who-"

"Well, I'll think about it when it happens." Haruka interrupted her.

"For now, nobody comes into my house, it's not a fucking brothel."

Michiru looked at her attentively, intrigued by the reaction. She reflected on the life of the other, on the secrets she had to keep, on the lies she lived with. And a thought struck her.

"Have you ever fallen in love, Haruka?" Tenou looked at her puzzled, surprised by the question. Then a bitter smile bent her lips.

" _Love hates me, doc_." The girl did not expect such an answer. But in the light of the destructive vision the other had of himself, it was not completely meaningless. She watched her sigh, and extract the Viper's keys.

"I thought back to that evening at the Four Seasons, for the veterans." Michiru looked at her for a moment, then remembered the invitation on fine paper with the coats of arms of the five-star hotel and the American army. And then, in a chain, the kitchen, the cut on her finger, the gesture of Haruka ...

 _Do not digress. Focus. Focus !!_

"I concluded that maybe I could even go there." She inserted the ring of the key ring on the forefinger, starting to spin the key. "But only if you come too." The girl raised her eyebrows, surprised, and the other locked the key ring in her palm.

"If you're here, I'll be calmer, and I'll keep from slapping some stupid politically inflated balloon." Michiru smiled, then nodded.

"I would be very honored, Haruka."

"So at least we are even with the invitation to the concert, I mean."

"I did not invite you for a benefit." Haruka shrugged. Then she glanced at the back of the car.

"You'd better get Hotaru to bed, or soon the head will come off your neck, on that seat." Michiru peered at the seat, and smiled at the sight of the totally unnatural position assumed by the child in sleep, but that seemed totally comfortable for that, and even reconciling the rest.

She looked back at Haruka, who was moving away a few steps. "Well, see you.""Haruka?"The other stopped, and Michiru cocked her head. "Will you wear your uniform?"Haruka did not immediately catch. Then she understood, and nodded.

"By force, it's an evening organized by the army."A broad smile was painted on Michiru's face. "Then I can finally see you, you do not know how curious I am!"Tenou did not answer, then narrowed her eyes, and a smile brought her lips up.

"Ah yes, I see her now."Michiru did not understand. "See ... what?"

" _The over-excited teenager_."

x

 **Author's notes: Ahah! I enjoyed writing this chapter, it's quite long, yet a bit funny.**

 **A bit about Haruka's mum and her past too, of course in the next chapters it will be better explained.**

 **I can tell you that there will be an hour X, on the 50th day, do you imagine what could happen on this moment? Wait to find out! ;)**

 **P.S. leave a comment or write me PM if you have any doubt. Bye!**


	12. Chapter 12

**I don't own anything but the translation.**

 **Breaking point**

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _6 June 2008,_

 _Day 48_

She rolled the invitation in her hands, while the usual breeze that seemed to come to life only there, at that point of the roof. 

She enjoyed playing in her hair. 

_... a medal of military value will be given to those who have distinguished themselves for their actions ..._

She leaned her head against the railing behind her and began to look at the sky, where the nuances of the dawn were beginning to break into the grayness of the moment.

No more night, but not even dawn. The umpteenth she saw, in that one week. 

She moved her shoulder again in pain, still unaccustomed to the movements which the motorbike forced it. She put the hand-made cigarette to her lips, and the map became incandescent when she took her breath: the taste of tobacco mixed with that of marijuana, and when the smoke returned outside after passing through the lungs, it was lost in the wind , leaving behind its typical smell. 

Ruka.

Her whispered name echoed in her mind. She saw her smile, a ray of light in the awareness of that last moment. And she returned to the dust and rocks of the place where the scene had taken place, and to everything that had happened between the walls of the loculus.

She took her head in her hands, the invitation still tight in the palm. 

She felt it. She felt it coming out of her skin, pressing it into her chest, into her temples, begging to go out. She felt her despair asking her to free her, and her body less and less able to restrain her.

But that was her punishment, the punishment for the monster she was.

For what it was stained. Learn from pain. _Do not be weak, Tenou. Weakness kills._

She took the last puff and blew out the spinel, taking away the butt. 

She crossed the roof and went downstairs to her floor, making sure to close the little door well. Once inside the apartment he went to the bathroom, throwing the remains of the cigarette in the drain and after having flushed the toilet, she opened the mirror above the sink, revealing the packs of medicines in a row that contained: she wondered what could make her sleep a dreamless sleep, and eventually took one at random. 

So they all end up 'azepam', she thought, and none, however, will take effect. 

She put a couple of capsules in her mouth and went to the kitchen, swallowing them with a sip of water from a small bottle abandoned near the refrigerator; leaning on the island table, she closed her eyes for an instant, noting that the niche was still there. She strode up to the living room and her eye fell on the phone, placed next to the controller on the low table in front of the sofas. 

_Call me for anything, at any moment,_ she once told her. 

And for a long moment she stared at that little object, undecided whether or not to call Michiru and talk to her, finally. 

Tell her everything, once and for all. And if you tell her, she will finally see the horrible being you are. 

She will see the monster who has tried to kill her again, and she will leave. 

That thought made her grab the phone. Sure, you idiot, because you did not think about it before.

If you tell her, she will run away. And you will manage not to destroy her too. 

She began to dial the number, when another voice, in the corner of her mind, felt obliged to say his own. 

_But is that what you want? Do you want to lose her caresses, the sound of her laughter, the way she talks to you, as a friend, rather than as a patient?_

She narrowed her eyes, and the same strength with which she squeezed her eyelids passed to the hand with which she held her cell phone. 

_Bullshit! You just want to fuck her!_

"Leave me in peace, fuck." She groaned tightly. 

Do you want to lose the one person who seems to love you for who you are? Do you want to lose the only normal thing in your life? For a moment she considered hurling the phone as far as possible, but decided to let it slip from her hand to the sofa cushion. She went to the stereo, scanned among the CDs and when she found what she was looking for, she slipped it into the compartment; she raised the volume a little, and flicked the time. 

After a moment of silence, the sound of the synthesizers filled the room. She sat on the sofa, resting her head on the back, hoping that the voice of Matthew Bellamy could shut off all the others in her head, each one feeling the need to give her opinion.

 _Corrupt, you corrupt, Bring corruption to all that you touch. Hold, you'll behold, And behold and for all that you've done._

Everything became more muffled, and he thought that perhaps the sleeping pill, added to the grass, was doing its duty.

 _And risk, you will risk, You will risk all their lives and their souls. And burn, you will burn, You will burn in hell, yeah you'll burn in hell. You'll burn in hell, yeah you'll burn in hell for your sins._

Her eyelids grew heavy, and she could not explain why, but the idea of burning in hell made her laugh.

 _Our freedom is consuming itself, What we will become is contrary to what we want_.

The electric guitar and the battery made the walls of the apartment vibrate, and Haruka raised her right hand as if to direct the course of the sound.

 _Death, you bring death and destruction to all that you touch. Pay, you must pay You must pay for your crimes against the earth._

 _x_

 _Medical Hospital_ _"Edward Dewenish VA Medical Center"_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _8 June 2008,_

 _Day 50_

From the bench where she sat Michiru watched the patients accompanied by relatives and nurses animate the green area of Dewenish, and flipping through some files glanced at a patient, in particular, who on the other side of the driveway was sitting in a chair on wheels, alone, throwing dull looks to those who passed by.

"Dr. Michiru ..." Michiru turned to the voice, low and slightly shuffling, that had called her, and smiled at the sight of the short-haired boy with very short hair - among which stood a long scar that went from behind the ear to the temple, passing through the parietal bone - kneeling in front of her, with a daisy a little lopsided in the unnaturally intertwined hands.

"Doctor, do you want to marry me?" The doctor did not stop smiling and closed her files, then took the flower that the other was holding out to her.

"Of course I want to marry you, Jimmy," she replied, stroking her face, and the other looked down shyly, producing a nervous laugh.

"But first you have to listen to what Dr. Chiba says, or you'll never get out of the hospital." The other man returned to look at her and nodded vigorously, and Michiru used the hand that still held on his cheek to bring it close to his face and stamp a kiss on his forehead.

"James! James!" Both Michiru and the boy looked at the woman in her fifties walking the driveway, in the hands of the drinks probably taken from the distributor inside the hospital.

"James, honey, do not bother." She helped her get up, then turned to Michiru.

"Excuse me, Dr. Kaioh." But Michiru answered with a wave of her hand.

"No problem, Mrs. Beouford, your son just asked me to marry him." The woman smiled, caressing the boy's face that now had taken a can of Coke from her hands and was trying to open it.

"Well, it's the second time this week, is not it?" Michiru nodded, and then placed her elbow on the back of the bench to rest her cheek on the back of her hand, without stopping to look at the other.

"Prepare to have me as a daughter-in-law, ma'am. James has no intention of giving up."

"You really have a lot of patience, Doctor." A slight smile curled the doctor's lips, watching the two walk away, not before James declared her eternal love.

James Beouford had volunteered for Afghanistan two years earlier, and during a reconnaissance he was the victim of an explosive device that had blown up him and the tracked vehicle on which he was. Once extracted he was immediately sent back to the United States and operated, but the boy had entered a coma, a state he had stayed for several months until a Jimi Hendrix CD had opened his eyes. Unfortunately the brain was seriously damaged and now James - who was Jimmy for everyone - was physically a boy of twenty, but with the mind of a child of four. Michiru sighed, and after pinned the daisy to the pocket, picked up her files and returned to the entrance to the park, finding herself in the lobby of the Dewenish. She started towards the elevator, registering a certain movement in the area of the sliding doors at the entrance of the hospital, with a couple of patients literally glued to the windows that gave onto the parking lot, all taken in many appreciations towards something that had a fork. it was supposed to be four times liquid-cooled: since it was practically Arabic, for her, she let that information get lost in some useless part of her cerebral cortex.

But then, waiting for the elevator, she saw the expression of two very young trainees literally change the sight of something behind him: when one exclaimed

' _Look, it's Major Tenou!'_ , Everything was clearer.

Michiru smiled and turned to the lobby, forgetting the elevator and coming into visual contact with the silhouette of Haruka, dressed in motorcycle clothing, surrounded by her many admirers.

"Good morning, sweet girls." The girl shook her head.

 _My God, someone stop her._

She watched the swarm of chickens, just missing the little hearts in her eyes, and wondered if they had behaved the same way if they had known: some probably, just how it had happened to her.

And for a brief moment in her mind the idea was formed of making her way up to Haruka and printing a kiss in her mouth: just to see the reaction of those fighting geese.

But she realized more than immediately the absurdity of that thought, and drove it off, taking a few steps forward, waiting for Casanova to notice her.

What happened after a few moments.

"I say where are the other three?" She asked her after a brief moment.

"The other three?" Said Haruka a bit confused.

"The Horsemen of the Apocalypse: If you came to the hospital, it means that the end is near."

Haruka smiled, and shrugged.

"I just went over to tell you that they will send a car to pick us up, to go to the 'Four Seasons' on Saturday."

The doctor inclined her head.

"IS...?"

"And since I do not even have a shoe as a clue, I need your address, or I'll have to run all over Portsmouth." Michiru smiled, and exasperated a dreamy sigh.

"Heck, it's just like an appointment!"

"Look, I'm leaving." The girl shook her head, laughing, and motioned for her to follow her.

"Come on, let's go to my office." The elevator had arrived but in the meantime had also been recalled to another floor, so they began to wait. And Michiru was about to ask the other woman why he had not just phoned her to tell her the information, when she felt something brush against her shoulder. Even Haruka turned around, registering a further presence behind them, and when she caught a glimpse of a scar-faced boy who crossed his skull, the man began to move back, obviously, frightened. "Jimmy, what's up?" Michiru asked, intrigued by the reaction, while Haruka raised an eyebrow. But the other shook his head and looked up at Haruka again, immediately lowering it.

The doctor looked at him, then turned to Tenou, and again to Jimmy.

"Haruka, what did you do to him?" She asked the others inquisitorially, and Haruka looked at her, looking at her.

"But if I do not even know who he is." James was approached by his mother, and he took refuge in the woman's embrace. "Doctor, James wanted to say hello to her before I went back to her room, and I told her a million times not to bother her when she's busy."

"Oh, no trouble." She reassured her, and approached the boy.

"Hi Jimmy. And do not worry, Haruka is a friend of mine." She revealed him pointing to the other. James did not seem too convinced but nodded weakly.

"Haruka," he repeated, and after a last sidelong glance at Tenou, he walked away with his mother.

"Who is it?" Haruka asked when they were inside the elevator, and Michiru looked at her, noticing for the first time her eyes, surrounded by deep circles.

"He is a patient of Mamoru, but I want to ask to start some sessions of Music Therapy with him." Then she pointed to the daisy in her pocket.

"Oh, I forgot: he's also my future husband, he asked me to marry him, and he gives me flowers ... Is not he so sweet?"

"A love." Haruka agreed more than flatly, and Michiru rolled her eyes.

"What happened to him?" They left the elevator, starting to walk the familiar corridor that Tenou had not missed at all. "An accident in Afghanistan," she told her only.

Then Michiru became absorbed, and the silence accompanied the moments necessary to reach the office.

"You scared him." She then stated.

"He seemed very intimidated."

"I noticed."

"Is not that he knows you?" She proposed, but Haruka shook her head.

"You said he was in Afghanistan, and anyway I do not think I've ever met him, how did you say his name?"

"Beouford, James Beouford." Haruka thought about it for a moment.

"Never heard."

"Are you sure you have not done anything?" She then asked her, opening the office door wide, and Haruka shrugged. "What can I have done to him? I just looked at him." Michiru smiled, sitting down at the desk and placing her files in a corner; she refrained from telling her that her eyes were a real weapon, sometimes: under the blows of those emerald irises she had risked succumbing on more than one occasion.

"Perhaps in his regressive state James identified you as the ' _alpha male'_ , and therefore he fears you." She put the pen to her lips, thoughtful.

"Paradoxical." Haruka tilted her head. "I will take it as a compliment." She looked around, noticing how the room had changed its appearance since the last time it entered: the desk was now also occupied by several pen holders and a clip with a photo of which could only see the back in opaque paper. On the wall hung a calendar and a lithograph of 'The Kiss' by Gustav Klimt; on a cork panel, through several pins, were instead stopped several drawings of Hotaru. At the sight of the little girl's scribbles, Haruka was struck by a thought. She opened the zip of her jacket and took out a sheet carefully folded in four.

"Here." She handed it to Michiru, who got up to bring her closer.

"It's the design of Hotaru, the one with the dog." Michiru could not help but notice the irony in the words of the other.

"I must have stuffed it in my pocket without thinking, when I put Hotaru on the bike." She watched her put her helmet on the desk, and did not stop glancing here and there in the office.

"You can keep it if you want." She found herself telling her, but the other in response gave off a pin from the corkboard and placed the drawing with the others.

"Who is Itzhak Perlman?"

Haruka then asked, reaching out to grab something on the desk, and when Michiru finished scribbling her address on an acid green post-it, she saw Tenou in the hands of the classic music magazine that had attracted her attention, still wrapped in the cellophane that held a CD.

"He is a violinist, one of the most famous in the world."

She explained to her, taking the magazine out of her hands and holding out the note with the note. The other slipped it into her pocket, then turned around, sitting at the desk.

"And what's in the CD?" She asked again, pointing to the newspaper again.

"There are some of his performances dating back to 1990, taken from an evening dedicated to Tchaikovsky in St. Petersburg, when it was still called Leningrad." Haruka whistled, then leaned against the desk with her elbows.

"Looks interesting."

"More than interesting," replied Michiru, smiling.

"It's divine, the violin comes to life in his hands, sublime, I have no other words to describe it." She became thoughtful for a moment. "And what's more, he plays a Stradivarius, then the apotheosis of the sublime," she concluded in a sigh. Haruka frowned.

"Stradivari," she repeated absorbed, and Michiru put her hands on her hips.

"You're the daughter of a musician, I refuse to believe you do not know what a Stradivarius is." A smile was painted on Tenou's face.

"I know what Stradivari is, it's that reminds me of something, something," she paused for a moment to think, as if she missed the word.

"Familiar." She added after a long moment. "In what sense is it familiar?" Michiru was intrigued by the statement, and leaned against her desk, but the other shrugged.

"I know what it is, but not because I have read it or because it is a world-famous violin, and so I know it by hearsay. As you said the name my mother and my childhood came to mind. because, I do not remember it. "

"Stradivari was an Italian violin maker," the doctor suggested.

"Have you ever been to Italy?" Haruka thought about it, and the answer displaced Michiru.

"Yes. Or at least I think I was very young." I went with my mother."

The other took an absorbed look, bringing her hand to her chin.

"Could it be that your mother used to play the violin as well as the piano?"

She then asked, but Haruka was categorical.

"No, I'm sure, I would have remembered that." She stood up suddenly, arousing the surprise of Michiru when she found her in front of her, overpowering her.

"Well, whatever it was, I certainly do not think it matters much anymore." Michiru opened her mouth to answer them, but she saw herself looking at her from head to foot, her head slightly inclined to the side. "How come you're lower today?" The girl looked at her puzzled, then crossed her arms to her chest.

"I can not always wear heels. Today," she lifted one foot, to show the other black shoe with a white bow just below the rounded tip,

"I have the dancers." Haruka smiled and started to take up her helmet, but Michiru's hand rested against the hard surface of the shell, locking it in place.

"How long have you not slept, Haruka?" The other looked at her, not entirely surprised by the question.

"It's nothing, I'm just having trouble getting used to the idea of the house." A slight sigh came from Michiru's lips, which brought her closer.

"Haruka, if you do not want to go to that night-"

"It's okay, Michiru." She interrupted her. "Seriously." The doctor looked at him for a moment.

"Why do not you want to tell me what you see when you close your eyes?" She gently asked her, the hand that left the helmet to lean on her shoulder. She picked up only silence, and continued, just clutching the shiny fabric of the motorcycle jacket.

"Is this the place where they held you captive? Is that what you see?" Haruka stepped aside, breaking away from the doctor's touch.

"I have to go," she told her flatly, reaching for the door.

"Or maybe the person who called you 'Ruka'." At that sentence Michiru saw the other stop, and two green irises planted on the doctor's blue ones.

They had not talked about it since that day when she had discovered Haruka's reaction to the nickname, but the idea continued to torment her: who was that person? How much was linked to Tenou? Those, and many others, were questions that sooner or later would have liked to give an answer.

"I think it's time for you to talk about it, Haruka."

"And I do not think so, think." It was the dry response of the other, without stopping to look at her.

"You said she was someone you loved." Michiru urged her, and saw Haruka's eyes tighten slightly.

"Who was she? Why did zhe call you that?" _Because you allowed it, while I can not do it,_ she added mentally, immediately realizing the stupidity of that question, but she could not avoid to formulate even if only in her head.

Haruka never broke eye contact, and Michiru wondered if it would ever be possible to open a breach in that exasperating silence. "I asked you a question."

"To whom I do not want to answer."

"You're annoying." She could not stop herself from saying them, and Haruka raised an eyebrow.

"I can help you carry this weight, get rid of it, why do not you want to understand it?" "Because there is no weight you should bring." She told her after a long moment. "It's only my business."

"It's no longer a matter of your own from the moment you've crossed the threshold of this hospital."

Michiru replied, getting a theatrical snort in response. She looked at Haruka and looked up at the ceiling, and brought her hand to her face, forcing her to look at her.

"There are times when we can not do it alone," she told her in a smile.

"Trust me, Haruka. Take your armor off, even for a moment, you need more than you can imagine." Haruka did not know what to say, and for a moment she lost herself in the warmth of Michiru's caress. Then she shook her head, and grabbing her by the wrist removed her hand from her face.

"No," she whispered then. "The armor keeps me standing, doc. If I take it off, I'll drop and nobody will help me get up."

"Here you are wrong." Michiru objected. "How many times do I have to tell you yet? I'm here for you." A bitter laugh came from Haruka's lips. "You can not hold me, Michiru." "You can not say that." They looked at each other for a long moment, then Tenou sighed.

"Even Orlando could not scratch Durlindana, doc." Michiru looked at her in surprise, then smiled at her.

"Then you're not just a crude soldier, Major." "Well, at West Point I was also studying." She answered her, shrugging.

Before adding: "Occasionally." Michiru shook her head, and with a smile hid the bitterness of Tenou's lack of trust. Silence filled the room, and Haruka put her hand on the door handle.

"Think about what I told you, Haruka." Tenou looked at her for a moment.

"See you Saturday, doc."

"See you on Saturday." She replied before looking at her disappear into the corridor, remaining then thinking of being protected by the walls of her office.

x

She threw another glance at Hotaru, sitting at the living room table, all set to color the new design with yet another dog of the day. She smiled as she watched her, basking in her absorbed gaze; in the small portion of the tongue that tended to come out when she concentrated on something extremely important for her.

And she felt a pang in her heart, thinking of Mitsuo, who had that same little vice.

She detached herself from the wall from behind which she had observed the child, entering the room next to the bedroom that was her studio: the smell of tempera and brushes invaded her nostrils, but it was not to the painting that would be dedicated, that evening. She crossed the room to the corner near the window, where the music stand was in front of her.

From a nearby shelf she took the case of her violin: she opened it and lifted the instrument from the internal padding, then positioning it in the crook of her neck, not before she had placed the handkerchief on the chin. She quickly flipped through her scores, finding among the last ones with the words' Tchaikovsky: Valzer-Scherzo Op.23 ': even if, after hearing him play by Perlman, it was like giving a noose to his self-esteem and then saying' Go, and commit suicide '.

She took a breath and concentrated, not an easy task since that night her thoughts were monopolized by the speech that same morning with Haruka.

She began to follow the score, but got stuck in a not particularly difficult passage. _There is no weight you should bring._

She began again, thinking that holding whatever weight that had been in Haruka's soul was no longer something she had to, but wanted.

She wanted with all her heart. Because to see her like that, closing herself in on herself and moving away from the others - including herself - in order not to hurt herself and above all not to hurt, in that absurd, annihilating golden that was seen around her, made her sick.

She groaned again, and closed her eyes, abandoning the arm with the bow along the body.

She decided to put aside Tchaikovsky for a moment with all due respect. And she wondered what melody could be Haruka. She remained absorbed for a long moment, the notes that crowded in her mind, arranging herself in an ideal pentagram, trying to better define the torment that animated Tenou.

She hesitated a second, then the bow returned to the ropes: the sound that drove the silence was nervous, hard. Elusive, like an impetuous wind. She recalled the moment she had met her; the day he had tried to strangle her. How it opened up and then hid, again. But she remembered the way Haruka talked about her mother, and that boyfriend of her comrade. And the melody became sweeter.

"Mom!" Hotaru's little voice forced her to stop, and she entered the study.

"What are you playing?" She asked, hugging her legs, and Michiru stroked her head. "I play the music of a man named Tchaikovsky." Hotaru sulked, and tried to repeat the composer's name, unsuccessfully.

Michiru smiled, then leaned towards the child.

"Would you like to try?" The churches. "It's been a long time since you've done it." Hotaru nodded vigorously, and Michiru helped her place the violin on her shoulder. She placed the chubby fingers on the keyboard, then accompanied the movement on the bow, which screeched at the beginning, and then softened slightly on the note end.

"Here is the 'Do'." Michiru explained, then changing the grip of the small fingers of her left hand. The bow rubbed again.

"This is the 'Sol'." Hotaru smiled, clearly satisfied with her musical production, and continued in this way for several other notes. Until the child broke away from the instrument and the violet irises looked for the girl's heavenly ones.

"Mom, Haruka can come to our house?" Michiru looked at her in surprise, placing the violin in the case. She smiled at the little girl, approaching her, then brushing her cheek with the back of his hand.

"Why do you want Haruka to come to our house, angel?"

"Because he always seems sad." The girl's response displaced her, and she lifted her up, kissing her forehead.

"Haruka has seen so many bad things, honey."

"How to the news?" The girl kissed her again, laughing.

"As on the news, yes." She put her on one of the kitchen chairs, and opened one of the cupboards, taking out the tea bag, not before turning on the kettle. Hotaru turned to her mother, the expression of who understood everything and found the solution printed on the round face.

"We can make him a cake!"

"And what cake can we do?" She asked seriously, and the child became very absorbed.

"Chocolate!" She then said.

"Does he like chocolate, mom?" Michiru thought about it for a moment.

"I do not know." She told her sincerely.

"I never asked him to." Hotaru did not say anything else, and summed up that thoughtful air that really did not suit a child so small but somehow -and Michiru could not explain the reason- to Hotaru fit well.

She put the tea bag in the boiling water and sat down at the table, above which the little girl was lying, her little hands holding her chin.

Michiru asked her to tell her about the school, and Hotaru did not have to repeat it twice, temporarily forgetting Haruka, and all her questions.

x

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _12 June 2008_

 _Day 54_

The trill of the intercom panicked Michiru, who groaned her disappointment from behind the bedroom door.

"He said at half-past eight!"

"Actually it's half past eight, Doctor," Jenny said from the living room, smiling then at the sight of Hotaru splashing off the couch to run toward the object hanging on the wall and respond.

"Haruka?" She began to say, and Jenny joined her, spurred on by Michiru's request to respond.

"Haruka, can you come to my house?" The girl asked after a moment of silence in which, Jenny imagined, the soldier answered.

She lifted Hotaru in her arms and had the telephone receiver ring at the same moment that Michiru's head was facing the corridor.

"Tell Haruka I almost did, just two minutes." She snapped her lips, totally annoyed by the delay she had accumulated. She went back to the bathroom, accompanied by the sound of Jenny's voice repeating her request to Haruka: she brushed back the blush, straightened her hair - which in the end, after a long internal conflict, decided to leave it loose on her shoulders, and ran in room, where the dress awaited her on the bed.

"Doctor, he said that if she does not go down in five minutes he will have to hitch her." Michiru laughed, pulling off her sweatshirt and soft pants, and carefully pulled on her stockings. Then an idea lit up. "Ask if he wants to go up!" She called from the room, and shortly thereafter she began to hear the voice of Hotaru shouting the request in the intercom: she imagined it in Jenny's arms, holding on to the receiver with both hands, and could not help but smile.

She took the zip down on the back of the dress and after checking that he had cut away all the tags, she carried it over her head, making it go down to her chest where she placed the bandeau bodice and positioned the shoulder well that crossed on the otherwise. She heard a knock on the door, and invited Jenny to come in, assuming she was the girl since Hotaru had never had much regard.

"Wow, doctor!" She exclaimed the baby-sitter when she saw her in the long, water-green dress.

"You are beautiful!"

"The shoes are still missing." Michiru objected, looking for heeled sandals around the room, and recognizing them after a moment near the door.

"What did he say?"

"He grunted something that frankly turned out to be incomprehensible, then asked to open the door."

"Typical of Haruka, definitely." She put on a first shoe, and Jenny gave her a hand with the other.

"But, um, doctor," she began, and it did not take Michiru long to figure out what she wanted to ask.

"So you and this guy-"

"I'm just accompanying him to this evening," she interrupted her.

"It's not an appointment, if that's what you want to know. Major Tenou is a patient of mine. " Jenny blushed at the embarrassment of having made a gaffe, and when Michiru stood in front of the mirror she arranged the long folds of her dress.

"You seem rather nervous, that's all." In fact, she was a little agitated: she had never been to such an event and, in all honesty, did not know how to behave. It probably should not have been too different from the evenings of the most important concerts, and this thought had encouraged her. But there were many other variables, for that evening, not least the curiosity on the edge of the morbid to see Haruka dressed in all its official uniform.

She did not have time to reply because Hotaru announced - probably to the whole building, given the tone of voice decidedly too many decibels beyond normal - that Haruka had arrived. The baby-sitter rushed out of the room, a gesture that tore a smile at the doctor, and after a last look at the figure reflected and a quick pass to the aquamarine hair, took the clutch from above the chest of drawers and went to the door of the room. And almost colliding, in the doorway, with a breathless Jenny. "Female doctor!" The girl hissed in a very low voice, coming back from the living room.

"God, but it's a crash!" Michiru smiled, shaking his head, and the other reached her hands in front of her face.

"If you really are not interested, you must present him to me!"

"I'll introduce you right away if you want." She murmured, looking at her, crossing the corridor; and when she turned and the living room opened to her sight, she spotted Hotaru intent on saying something to Haruka, standing on the doorstep, who had just given her a lump.

He stopped in the middle of the living room, and not noticed from the other she observed the gray uniform on which stood the rank of Major just above the pocket, on which the US Army pin was pinned on the left side of the jacket. On the right side, instead, there was the plate with the name and symbol of the Fourth Infantry Division; on the shoulder of that same side he immediately recognized the patch of the Cent Battalion, which she had seen many times on the uniform of Mitsuo.

And while Michiru looked at her, the unexpected happened: a shiver ran through her spine, while she felt the blood flow to her cheeks and sensations come to life from a certain point of her body that she preferred not to mention in her head, and that indeed she tried to repress with all her strength.

Haruka looked up from Hotaru, and looked at her without saying a word: the doctor saw a wrinkle forming between the blond eyebrows, the only emotion that betrayed the face of the other.

"Finally." Tenou then told her, without taking her hands out of her pockets and standing upright.

"The driver has had time to become a grandfather, since we've been waiting." Jenny laughed at the joke, and Michiru rolled her eyes.

"Jenny, this is Major Haruka Tenou." Haruka stood to attention, then shook hands with the girl who looked at her without reactions, her lips slightly parted. Tenou gave her a puzzled look, and when she managed to pull the limb out of Jenny's grip, she turned to Michiru.

"Shall we go?" The other nodded, and after the latest recommendations to the babysitter and a kiss to Hotaru, who did not stop calling Haruka, they left the apartment. "But do you trust leaving Hotaru with that girl?" Asked Tenou once inside the elevator. "She seemed catatonic."

"Maybe you do not realize the effect you usually do, more than ever in uniform," joked Michiru, hoping that the other did not understand how much she believed in what she had just told her.

"Well?" So she inquired after a long moment of silence. "You do not tell me anything?" Haruka leaned against one of the walls, and spoke to her, turning slightly.

"You're pretty." She only told her, and Michiru shook her head.

"Better to die rather than compliment me, huh?" Tenou smiled and did not reply, until she noticed the very curious look of the other turned towards her own anatomical part that apparently seemed to have disappeared.

"I put some bands." She answered the silent question, and Michiru nodded slightly. The elevator ended its run and Haruka held out her arm, silently moving toward the Lincoln through the darkened windows that waited on the road, with the engine running.

x

 _'Four Seasons Hotel'_

 _George Washington Hotel_

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _9:15 pm_

The great room in which the guests would have waited for the beginning of the dinner, which would take place in an elegant hall with large arched windows and mosaic floor, presented a decidedly Liberty style that did not escape Michiru when she put foot: ignored for a moment the aperitif that young people in white livery offered to the many soldiers and their companions to look at a series of windows decorated with artistic floral doodles, finding themselves colliding on a grand piano that, for that evening, It seemed unused.

She turned around, looking for Haruka between the talking faces and among those who, standing beside the long table at the back of the room, were eating veggies and voulives standing.

She saw her approaching her, two glasses of champagne in her hand, and her body reacted again to that sight. What scared her not a little.

"It's a kind thought, from you." She told her when she was next to her, and Haruka looked at her in confusion.

"Bring me a drink."

"Actually they are both for me," was the other in response, draining the first glass in half a second. Michiru shook her head, and took the other flute out of her hands.

"I do not want to be a nuisance on duty, but you take drugs and you should not see alcohol from a distance. "

"Is not it a little late to remind me?"

"You would do it on your own, as always." She raised her glass to Tenou, in a hearty toast.

"To your liver, and to the atrocious torment you are forcing it." Haruka smiled, and leaned on the piano.

"Exaggerated," she murmured, then covering the entire hall with her eyes.

"Nine hours," she said then, and Michiru cocked her head.

"On your left, the guy who walks with the crutch." The girl identified the military man, who was chatting with a couple of younger soldiers.

"Colonel Tucker, commander of the Second Brigade, First Infantry Division, stationed in Baghdad." She explained, and Michiru nodded, then turned to look at Haruka, whose gaze was lost in the room.

"Twelve o'clock," she continued, and the girl looked straight ahead, toward a rather tanned soldier with short graying hair. "Lieutenant Colonel Robertson, Third Brigade, First Cavalry Division.They took care of the Green Zone, and the passages to and from Baghdad." Then she unexpectedly approached her, and nodded at her a graduate with white hair, across the room.

"Stay away from that, Michiru." The doctor became curious, and looked for Haruka's gaze.

"Who is it?" Brigadier General David Andrew Lloyd. " She told her after a long moment. "It's thanks to him if I have not practically slept in West Point for three years, and now I have trouble sleeping." Michiru looked at her, and the other started talking.

"He was a sergeant at the time, and one of the instructors." She explained, stealing the flute from Michiru's hands.

"He hated me for my surname and my Japanese origins, I hated him for how he treated me ... Now I hate him heartily, but the fucking head really did a great career." She took a sip, then handed it back to Michiru.

"What exactly happened at West Point?" The other worried, but Haruka shook her head.

"Night trainings, exhausting races in the rain, paths of resistance to the limits of sadism, he made me see all the colors, that son of a bitch." Then she hissed through clenched teeth. And she was surprised to hear Michiru's hand take her own.

"Now many things are explained."

"Like, why am I a fucking psycholable?" Michiru smiled. "Maybe." She only told her, and Haruka pulled away from the piano, carrying Michiru's hand under her arm. "Let's go for a ride." The girl followed her in the middle of the hall, watching her respond to several greetings, and accept without showing particular emotions the compliments received by some local politicians. A thin figure in a pinstriped suit, which Michiru recognized as belonging to the Virginia Senator's staff, asked her about her father: she heard Haruka tell him that the parent was in Europe at the time, and deduced that probably in that visit to Washington they must have at least felt, particular that she had decided not to tell them.

It seemed calm, all things considered. It was not exactly the Haruka she was used to interacting with, but she was doing well. And she had noted, with great pleasure, that she tended to keep her close; sometimes even in close contact, like at the moment.

Maybe she really needed a presence that calmed the spirits, and Michiru basked in the ephemeral idea of having some relaxing power on the other.

"Major Tenou!" Both turned to the call, seeing a young blondish-haired soldier with dark eyes approaching them in stride, after taking leave of a girl in a black dress to whom he had left a glass of champagne in hand: Michiru recognized the same patch of the Fourth Infantry Division was split, and it was not long before she felt Tenou stiffen next to her.

"Major Tenou, he does not know how pleased it makes me see you again!" He told her sincerely, after greeting her at attention.

"Michiru, this is Captain Wyatt, Captain Wyatt, Dr. Michiru Kaioh." Haruka introduced them, and the boy kissed her hand.

"Wyatt was with me in Tikrit, before he was transferred to Fallujah." He nodded, and looked at Michiru. "It was an immense regret for me to leave the Fourth, and especially the Major, what he did in that ambush just outside the town of Tikrit is legend." Haruka snapped her lips, and Michiru looked at her curiously. "Unfortunately I can not share, Captain, since I do not know the facts."

"Well, if you let them talk." The young man replied, before being overtaken by the words of Tenou. "How come here, Wyatt?" The other shrugged.

"I came back in January, I was injured in my right leg during an evacuation." He began to explain.

"I do not know when I'll have to leave, but at the moment I'm enjoying my marriage, Major." He turned slightly, glancing at the girl who had left behind that now, three-quarters, revealed a rounded shape at the level of the belly.

"Kim is pregnant." Michiru smiled. "Congratulations, Captain." The boy taunted, thanking her.

"It's unbelievable how that child has already changed my life ... Before, it was hard for me to think that life could somehow go on." A certain sadness spotted Wyatt's words, looking for Haruka's gaze.

"Especially after certain things we are forced to witness." He sighed, before continuing.

"How are you, Major? They told me of the attack, and that it was done prague."

"I'm fine." Haruka interrupted him more than immediately, and the boy smiled at her.

"I imagined it, you're not the type that breaks easily." Wyatt had a look so admiring that Michiru did not feel like telling him that she was Haruka's psychologist, and that the other was being treated for Post Traumatic Disorder.

"Is the others still in contact, Major?" He asked that suddenly, and Haruka shook her head. "And the girl, do you have any news?" A spark of curiosity lit up in Michiru, but when she turned to Haruka to ask for information, she noticed that her cheeks had lost color.

"No," she said monotonously, and Wyatt nodded. The announcement that the guests could sit in the Great Hall for the beginning of the dinner - by the mouth of the director of the room, broke the slight tension that had arisen between the three; and when the young soldier took his leave to join his wife, Michiru clutched Haruka's arm.

"Who was he talking about?" The churches, moving in a corner. But the other got rid of the grip.

"Nobody ... Go ahead, I'll be back in a second."

"Haruka-" He tried to reply, but the other struggled every attempt to objection in the bud.

"Michiru, I'll be back in a second, I have to go to the bathroom." She saw her disappear among the bystanders who neatly went to the salon. And soon she saw Kim, Captain Wyatt's young wife, sit alone at the table.

x

 _'Four Seasons Hotel'_

 _George Washington Highway_

 _Portsmouth Virginia_

 _10:00 pm_

Dinner was starting and Haruka was practically gone. For a second, Michiru was seriously afraid that the other one was leaving with her car, but no one seemed to have seen Major Tenou. Not even going out, which was a slight consolation. Captain Wyatt had been back for a while in his place, and managed to be told only that he had left Major Tenou near the hotel bar: at the look she had seen when she saw her approaching him, Michiru suspected that Haruka had warned him of anything they had said, perhaps even using veiled threats. At the bar, however, she had not found her, and asking one of the stewards scattered here and there had learned that a soldier had headed for the hotel lobby: she then entered a corridor where the noise of her heels was muffled from the carpet.

Then, looking around for a moment, she decided to follow her sixth sense and walk up a flight of stairs, which ended in a concourse atrium between the hall and the elevators that led to the rooms.

She threw open a door and found herself in a corridor leading to the baths: at last he saw her, sitting on the floor next to a mahogany table, her head against the wall, looking at the ceiling in the gesture that was her trademark.

"Haruka!" She exclaimed with mixed irritation and relief.

"When you mentioned the bathroom, I did not think you'd choose the one on the other side of the hotel." She started jokingly, until she realized the unnatural movement of the other's chest, which rose and fell too fast. "Haruka?" She approached her in a hurry, and knelt in front of her, putting the clutch bag aside: she was pale, and holding her head back, she tried to regain a perpetually broken breath. "I can'-" she began to tell her in a painful gasp, when she realized the presence of the doctor.

"I can not ... breathe." Michiru appealed to her cold blood and quickly unbuttoned her jacket, then loosened the tie's knot and opened the first buttons of her shirt.

"It will be all right, Haruka," she reassured her, then lifting her left sleeve to take the pulse. In the meantime he leaned over her, spreading an eye with two fingers and making sure the pupil was normal.

She mentally counted the recorded beats, and deduced that she had gone into tachycardia.

She wiped the sweat from her forehead with the palm of her hand, warning her to breathe as deeply as possible.

She reached for her purse to pick up the phone, intending to call 911: but when she recapitulated the symptoms Haruka presented, the diagnosis came to light.

"It's a panic attack, Haruka," she told her, taking her face in her hands, to be seen, but the other closed her eyes.

"It hurts me-" she stammered, touching her chest, and Michiru approached her again. "It's in your head, you're not going to die, it's a reaction from your mind."

The girl tried to nod, while her breathing had become more and more broken.

She tried to say something, striking the wall behind her in an attempt to catch her breath.

"Ssh, do not talk." The doctor ordered it. "Breathe deeply," she instructed her then. "Look at me Haruka. Breathe deeply." Haruka did not seem to cooperate, so she took her hand and placed it on her chest; she did it with her own, on the other's chest.

"Breathe with me, Haruka." She managed to make them complete two deep breaths, and she watched her open her eyes. The green irises looked for those colors of the sea of Michiru, and what scared the girl was to read a total, disarming despair.

Haruka moved her lips again, and finally the doctor could understand what the other was saying.

"I did not want to, I did not want to." Michiru did not answer, waiting for Haruka to regulate her breathing.

"I did not want to," she repeated in a whisper.

"I did not want to, Michiru."

"What did not you want, Haruka?" She asked her, scared by the mantra that the other kept repeating them.

But Haruka looked at her for a long moment.

"Help me." She murmured only after a moment. And Michiru watched her approach her and hug her tightly, hiding her face in the hollow between shoulder and neck.

The surprise did not make her react, so on two feet, and shivered at the contact of the cold metal of the insignia of the other's uniform on the skin. Although she was not sure it was just for that.

She felt Haruka's breath tickle her neck as she spoke.

"Do not let me fall, Michiru." The girl heard herself say. "Please do not let me fall." At that request Michiru could not help but hug her in turn, sinking his fingers into the soft fabric of the uniform and holding tight with all her strength.

She closed her eyes, resting her cheek on Haruka's hair, which now, finally, he was breathing normally.

"I'm here, Haruka." He murmured. "I hold you." Haruka strengthened her grip on the slim body of the doctor, and stayed like that, sitting on the ground in a corridor of the 'Four Seasons', while unaware diners began to eat a few rooms away.

x

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

When Michiru threw open the door of her apartment, immersed in the darkness given the time, she felt exhausted but at the same time extremely anxious.

Haruka had not wanted to go after the attack that had struck her, and in the most complete silence they had returned to dinner: she had watched her just touch her plates and wait for the moment of the award, immediately after which she had signaled to follow her, finding themselves outside the 'Four Seasons', their car waiting. She had not said a word all the way, lost in her thoughts looking out the window, and was immediately brought home leaving instructions to the driver to take her back: she had tried to make her talk, to press her about what you do was said with Captain Wyatt, but probably asking questions to a wall would have given her more satisfaction. And as she walked toward Hotaru's bedroom to wake up Jenny, the cell phone still in the hands of the sleeping girl hugging her baby, she also thought that making her sick was not just knowing that something had broken inside Haruka - and thanking heaven that the reaction was a panic attack, rather than something more serious as reckless gestures, but also how the other was literally splashed off her arms when, probably recovering the clarity, she realized what was happening around: not that she expected a 'thank you', but not even that, later, treated her like a plague. She smiled at Jenny's loud yawn, and waited for the girl to regain some lucidity before paying her - leaving her a little extra, and letting her go, not before offering her a cup of coffee.

She stood for a while, watching Hotaru sleep, curled up on her side, then walked over to her room and began to undress, her mind flooded with a whirlwind of thoughts as the evening dress left room for nightwear.

It took longer than necessary to remove make-up, and thought to get a herbal tea already knowing that she would not be able to sleep: the state of the other distressed her a little, and wondered if it was risky to leave home alone after what was success. The bubbling of the water distorted it from its ruminations, and prepared the drink, then settling down at the kitchen table.

She tapped the spoon on the smooth surface, unable to calm the agitation that gripped her.

The last time she had underestimated the problem, she thought, she had found suicide and murder on her conscience, and months and months of remorse and guilt, which had not yet subsided.

She covered her eyes with her hands and groaned at that thought, until the idea that something could happen to Haruka became unbearable: forgetting the steaming herbal tea returned to her bedroom, replacing nightwear with an old sweatshirt and a pair of sports pants.

She then strode into Hotaru's room, and stroking her face began to call her.

"Hotaru, Hotaru, honey, wake up." The little girl moved into bed, lying on her back, and Michiru pulled a jacket and a light cover from the colored dresser next to the window.

"Love, we have to go out." She whispered to the little girl, putting her on the bed and slipping the garment over her pajamas: Hotaru mumbled something, and glancing at Sponge Bob's clock on the nightstand that was almost two o'clock in the morning, Michiru wondered if she was not total and sound crap.

"I'm sleepy, Mom." The child objected without even opening her eyes when Michiru lifted her up and walked out of the room, then putting the blanket over her shoulders.

"I know, angel, but I promise you'll sleep as long as you want, tomorrow."

"Where do we go?" She asked sleepily, repositioning herself in the arms of her mother, who grabbed the car keys from a bowl on a shelf near the front door, before answering them. "Let's go to Haruka's house, love."

x

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _13 June 2008_

 _Day 0_

 _2:18am_

The first thing that opened up to her as soon as she opened the door of Haruka's apartment - not without difficulty, since she had to hold Hotaru in her arms, was a pair of legs spread out between the two sofas of the living room, while the body remained hidden just by the arrangement of the sofa. "Haruka!" She called, closing the door behind her and striding toward the shape that, in the darkness illuminated by the light of the forty-five inch on the CNN but kept at zero volume, stood still.

She breathed a sigh of relief when she realized that Tenou kept her eyes open, probably lost in the many thoughts that engulfed her mind, the backs of her hands crossed on her forehead.

She still wore her uniform.

"Haruka!" She called her again, and finally the other seemed to notice her.

"What are you doing on the ground? You gave me a shot!" She scolded her, and Haruka looked at her for a long moment, without betraying any emotion.

Hotaru remembered her presence with a cough, and Michiru began to feel the baby's weight numbing her limbs.

"Where can I make Hotaru sleep?" In response, the other went back to looking at the ceiling. Michiru realized that it would be a long night, and went to the corridor of the sleeping area, remembering that the first door she had met would have been Haruka's room: in fact, opening it, she found herself in Tenou's bedroom, occupied in the middle from a large bed to a square and a half completely intact.

She took off the jacket to Hotaru and placed it on the low and long chest of drawers in lacquered cherry wood that furnished the wall next to the door, surmounted by a large mirror, and laid the child on the bed, covering her with the blanket she had worn from home: when she was sure that the change of surface had not disturbed the little girl, she left the room, leaving the door open, while she closed the corridor.

Returning to the living room he recorded for the first time, thanks to the continuous change of light produced by the images in the television, the new piece of furniture that Haruka had mentioned: the elegant grand piano occupied the space that had seen the empty space day when she was injured preparing her lunch.

"Haruka, how are you feeling?" She asked her, sitting down next to her on the ground. Haruka had no reactions, and continued to look at the ceiling.

"Talk to me." She murmured to her then. "Holding it inside is destroying you."

Still no answer, and Michiru sighed at the idea of having to spend the night wrapped in the silence of the impassable marble statue that was Tenou.

They spent endless moments, and the doctor threw back her head, leaning on the low table that supported her back, trying to find something interesting in the white plaster ceiling while the anchorman CNN blabbering mute breaking news.

"I killed her, Michiru." Haruka said in a low voice, without moving an inch, or take her eyes off the ceiling.

Michiru's attention was immediately captured, but the girl did not reply anything, letting the other finally break the banks. "I let her fall in love with me, I let her trust me, see me as something special."

A sigh full of pain came from Tenou's lips.

"I could not protect her, Michiru, I did not know how to turn her away, and I killed her in the end."

 **Author's notes: I'm sorry for the late, but I have been quite busy. I hope you to enjoy this long chapter. Here we finally have the breaking point, in the next chapter all Tenou's past in Iraq.**

 **Bye, and see you next chapter!**

 **Leave a comment and let me know what you do think!**

 **P.S. I'm so sorry that I accidentally deleted the previous chapter, you should check it out before reading this. I'm sorry again for the bother.**


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything at all.**

 **333**

 _'Who is he who dies without death? Are you going to the kingdom of the dead people? " (The Divine Comedy, Inferno, Canto VIII, 84-85)_

 _Operation "Iraqi Freedom" 4th Infantry Division Headquarter,_

 _Tikrit,_

 _Iraq, 2007_

The tent was immersed in silence, broken only by the quiet laughter of a group of soldiers in a corner, intent on telling something that Richard could not hear lying on his cot, his arms crossed behind his head, lost in the images of the day just passed.

On the other side of the world Christmas had just passed, and he decided to open a book that he kept under his cot to extract the last letter from his family for that holiday, accompanied by a recent ultrasound of Susan: his sister would have had a boy, shortly thereafter, and Richard wondered when he would be able to see him while some of his comrades hoped to drown the melancholy of distance from home - and probably exorcise the mourning of losses that day - in a very bad rum bought under the counter.

"Shit, guys, I guess it's a mess." Everyone turned to the high-colored military just returned to the tent. Richard put the letter down and stood up on his elbows, without getting up from the cot: the boy's return was quite expected.

"Well, did you understand something, Baker?" One of the group asked, approaching him.

"General Connor is gone now, Coleman is still inside." He communicated that, and a red-haired boy with eyes brushed his eyes.

"Now?" Churches in disbelief.

"You mean they were in there ... how much, six hours?"

"More or less." Agreed another, shrugging. Baker was silent for a long moment.

"Major Tenou was pissed off black, a genuine beast."

"I believe it, I think Connor fucked him for good." He commented, crossing his arms, but Baker shook his head.

"You do not understand, it's Tenou fucking as much as Coleman as General Connor." The Major's screams were heard from outside, not even a reply from the two little lambs.

A couple laughed, and Banks decided to get up from the cot, approaching the little group.

"And now?" He went back to ask the red-haired guy.

"Is not that going to move him?"

"I mean," he shrugged, "Connor is still a general, screaming at him like that ... "

"If they transfer the Major, I'll take my leave." One broke out, and gradually everyone began to nod, pleading for the cause.

"Bullshit, it's that Tenou is a bloody hell, I'll tell you." They turned to the boy who had spoken, a Minnesota guy standing at the back of the group and shaking his head.

"He thinks God knows what god on earth only because he knows he can call his father and get rid of the mess, but he can not afford to do the good and bad weather with superiors just for his surname."

"Major Tenou does not make good or bad weather, as you say, hiding behind his name." Richard decided it was time to intervene, stepping forward. "If he put forward his opinions, it's because he was right, the bullshit made it by the central command, certainly not us." Nor did he stop for a second.

"Not even him."

"If the central command decided so, Tenou is not a damn thing to believe that the opposite was right, we are here to execute orders."

"Execute orders?" Banks was thrilled.

"Let me understand, Gibbs, if they told you to shoot a mob of civilians, would you do it because you're doing the orders?"

"Okay, guys, let's be calm," Baker began, putting himself between Richard and the other, whose tones had become dangerously hot.

"We are all a bit shaken, after today and-"

"I did not come up here to make some fucking questions." Gibbs interrupted him, overlooking the dormitory. Richard's eyes were a crack.

"Do you know who said 'I only executed orders'," the Nazis said in Nuremberg. "

"You're giving me the Nazi, uh?" Gibbs approached Richard charging, and two soldiers blocked him while Banks was kept still by Baker.

"You are a fanatical son of a bitch, Gibbs!" The boy burst out, and the other tugged at his constrictors. "And I should get insulted by you, Richard, but fuck you!"

"Guys, stop it." The red-haired boy tried to quell the spirits, but Gibbs continued undeterred.

"Just because you are always with Tenou you think so much superior to us? Today you are soiled with blood as much as me, asshole!"

"Now stop!" Baker's vocation resounded in the tent so loud that it seemed to Richard to have echoed it, even though it was an impossible thing according to all the laws of physics.

"What the fuck is on your mind? Do you want to send in containment, uh? The silence took over the excited moments, and after a long moment - and a sign from Baker - Gibbs was freed from the grip of the other two soldiers.

"Okay, I'm calm," he began to say, stroking his shirt." I'm calm. "

"Go for a ride, Gibbs." The other ordered him, pushing him toward the entrance of the tent, and he disappeared into the darkness of the camp without having to repeat it.

"Forget it, Richard, you know what it's like." Baker accompanied the words with a pat on the back, and Banks just smiled at the gesture of the imposing comrade. They remained silent, then the red opened his mouth to speak.

"Well, but Gibbs is not that he was wrong." At the sidelong glances he received a little from everyone, he hastened to finish the sentence.

"About Tenou, I mean."

"They will not move him, but not because he's a daddy's son. Tenou grew up with the war, he seemed born to be at the front, and his father told him how not to get his feet on his head. " Baker answered, crossing his arms to his chest.

"I can assure you that, if he could, the Major would give away his last name." Nobody replied to Richard's words, which he continued.

"It's not as they say. Tenou can not count on his father's support and, indeed, if he does some bullshit, the General would be the first to attack him. I'm sure. "

"Why do you defend him so much, Richard?" Banks looked puzzled at the boy who had just asked him the question.

"It's not that Tenou likes boys, and you and him ..."

Richard laughed at that not so veiled supposition, more than anything because if the Major had liked men there would have been nothing strange; indeed, it would have been completely normal. He tried to hide the reaction to that thought, while a chorus of protests poured over the author of the comment. "Come on, let's imagine!" Another broke.

"I mean, did you see him, fuck? That's the classic guy who has all the cunt he wants to snap his fingers." Then, glancing at the dormitory, he shook his head.

"But what do you want to know, I bet women run away when they see you." Everyone laughed, and Richard shook his head.

"Major Tenou is a good person." He then said, drawing attention to himself. "We forget it, but it bears the burden of many burdens alone, and it's in a difficult position."

"And when do things like today happen?" Richard was silent for a moment, reflecting on the decisions made by Tenou that day. Then he shook his head, spreading his arms. "We are human beings, Baker, we all make mistakes." He pulled a sigh, and grabbing the field jacket started toward the exit of the tent. "I need to get some air myself too." He bumped into Gibbs, who was coming back, and he did not even give him a glance. He crossed the space between the various aligned tents, reaching the building where Haruka's office was located: there was no light from the window, and he imagined that Colonel Coleman had gone too, and Tenou had finally given in to the call of the branda, to indulge in a well-deserved rest after a day like this.

He turned to go back, and won the idea that his doubts and questions would remain unanswered. But an image reappeared in a corner of his mind, and, looking back at the window, his eyes narrowed in the effort to focus on the detail that had made him retrace his steps, he could see a faint glow give the room a nuance. purple. He smiled, and went into what had been the main structure of the ex-factory, and walking as quietly as he could get to the door of the Major's office. He swallowed, knocking on knuckles. He got no answer, so he opened the door creaking noisily. Richard closed his eyes as he buried his neck between his shoulders, the disturbing noise amplified by the silence of the building.

"Richard, Silent like an elephant." The soldier was surprised by how Tenou recognized him instantly, then smiled at the joke. Peering into the darkness of the office, lit only by a small field torch placed horizontally under the window, he wondered where the hell his superior was since there seemed no trace.

Then he spotted a pair of legs spilling out where the desk stopped, and approached the cabinet.

"How did you understand that it was me?" He asked, surprised when the other was in his field of vision, long on the floor, the backs of her hands crossed over her forehead. She was still wearing the dirty field uniform of Iraqi civilians, and her face smeared with sand and dust.

"Who else could it be at this hour, so daring?" Richard smiled, then the realization hit him. "What's on the ground?"

"It helps me to reflect, when I have too many thoughts in my head." That remained thoughtful.

"Do you feel good?" Haruka sighed, and bent her neck a little to meet her gaze.

"You know Banks, you're the first to ask me." The boy shrugged, embarrassed. Then he crossed his legs and sat down next to Tenou, scratching his black mop.

"Why are you here?"

"I wanted to see how you were doing, today was a heavy day, and then the meeting with Coleman and Connor ..." She did not move, but grunted in the name of the two superiors.

"Will they punish you, Major?" Haruka did not answer, and Richard felt encouraged to continue. "We saw the Connor leave with his tail between his legs, and felt-"

"They will not punish me, Richard." The other interrupted him, sitting down and accompanying the gesture with a loud 'Ouff'.

"They know they were wrong, but they had to make a big voice with someone wide enough to take responsibility for when this story comes to the media." A slight smile curled Tenou's lips.

"Only they chose the wrong person to overthrow their shit." Richard did not reply, lacing his hands around his knees. They remained silent for a long moment, and when he spoke Haruka had to work hard to understand.

"What happened today, Major?" Haruka looked at him without emotion.

"You were there too, you know very well what's next"

"He understood what I mean." The other interrupted her.

"I thought our role was to help these people, Major, so I can not understand what happened this morning." Tenou took a deep breath and tilted his head back, looking at the crusted ceiling.

"Today was something that could be avoided, Richard. A sum of errors I want to believe will not be repeated, but we both know well that something similar will happen again." The other did not reply.

"I asked myself the same question, Banks, whether you want to believe it or not, see," he began to tell him after looking for the look, the same tone of a benevolent aunt. "I try to do my job the best I make decisions that will inevitably please someone and piss off others, but that's okay, because people's lives depend on those decisions, and I can not treat the subject lightly." He paused, allowing Richard to absorb everything he was saying best. "And unlike someone, like that gentleman who just left and who holds the rank of General, I still value human life." Richard did not look away from Haruka's, who continued.

"Then it happens that Baghdad decides to start bombing a village southeast of Tikrit, because according to the secret services there are dangerous terrorists, and that the so-called," Haruka raised the indices and the middle of the hands, bending them, "'smart bombs' instead of smart do not really have a cock."

Banks closed his eyes, the images of destruction and despair seen among the civilians on which their bombs had come down mercilessly.

"It's at this point, Richard, that I ask your question." Haruka's words made him open his eyes.

"If I am here to help these people, why do I find myself with a real massacre in a place under my direct jurisdiction? What am I doing, if my efforts are thwarted by those who identify a human being only as a dot on a radar? "

"You did not intervene the Military Engineers, and that building collapsed with our boys inside." Richard whispered, and the silence enveloped them, as heavy as the events they had witnessed that day. Then Haruka shook her head.

"I did not think it could come down in such a short time, and those of MSF kept saying that inside there were women, old people, children," she said. "You saw what the fuck was down there, and there was also to organize the security cordon, close the accesses but open the streets of the humanitarian corridor waiting for the arrival of the Genius would have been too high a risk, and would have created further confusion, but I could not even leave those people in there. "

Banks remained silent, and Haruka continued, running a hand through her dusty hair.

"Maybe I could handle the situation differently, Richard, but it's gone now. The silence saturated the room again.

"If there is only one thing that I am grateful to my father, that is having taught me to take on my responsibilities, and I take all of them, up to the last, for the mistakes I have committed today, without hurling them no one else, but if someone else does not do it I can not even pay for those who do not have enough balls. "

Richard looked at her, nodding. Before Haruka added,

"I mean, technically I do not even have any balls." Banks looked at her puzzled, and a light laugh came from his lips. Then he became serious.

"I trust you, Major." He told her after a long moment, and a bitter smile bent Haruka's lips. "I try to make mistakes as little as possible, Richard, but it's not easy, it's not easy at all."

"What will happen now?" The question caught her by surprise, but tried not to give it too obvious. Surely the Sunnis would not have left an unjustified massacre of unpunished civilians, and she knew that well. She just shook her head.

"I don't know, we just have to wait, we're not allowed." Richard watched Haruka stand up, and after a moment he imitated her.

"I need to take a shower, Banks, and I think it's time you go to sleep."

"Go and rest her too, Major, you look horrible." Haruka frowned, heading for her office door.

"Say a little, but did you see yourself?" She patted him on the shoulder, pushing him out of the room.

"Ah, Major." Banks called the other's attention when they were outside.

"I spoke with Colleen, down at the Oasis, and in a month they open the school, and they thought-"

"We'll take care of the escort, Richard, do not worry." Haruka reassured him, who then became thoughtful.

"In a month, did you say?" He nodded. "An exact month, January 27." A faint smile curled Haruka's lips, and after she had dismissed Richard, she began to walk slowly through the camp, the murmur of her soldiers inside the tents to accompany the crossing. She arrived at the building where the showers were located, not far from her lodgings, and after making sure no one was inside she barred the door. She opened the hot water jet inside one of the boxes, and stopped after unbuttoning the first dirty uniform button, watching the liquid hit the shower tray violently.

Her head was still full of the screams that the women had turned to her, and that Richard had translated as supplications to help them. In the eyes the image of the dead, of the buildings gutted by their own bombs. She saw the faces of every soldier of her team who had been buried by the collapse, and who had to identify herself, tearing off one of the two identification plates at the neck of the corpses in the macabre ritual that competed as the highest graduate in the field.

Boys who had sent herself into the building, to try to recover the injured. She took a step, and the amphibian was drenched, followed by the fabric of the trousers. And moving the other leg, too, she let herself be invested by the water, the wet clothes that weighed down on her. She put her hands on the wall in front of her, and bent her head, the jet that now hit her neck.

"In a month is my birthday," she murmured, covered in the noise of the shower, while the water soaked her hair and ran down her face, on her nose, between her lips. On her eyes, which she tightened up to get hurt, hoping that everything could disappear.

 _You included._

x

 _Operation "Iraqi Freedom",_

 _'The Oasis School for Children' (Former Iraqi_

 _Army Barraks)_

 _Tikrit,_

 _Iraq_

 _27January 2008_

It was sunny, that day.

Haruka narrowed her eyes to focus on the silhouettes of the children against the light that, around Colleen, hummed a tune that she could not immediately identify. She put the shotgun in her arms and after she had left with a finger the heavy bulletproof vest that stifled it in the midday heat, in the illusion of being able to breathe better, she began to approach the small group.

After two steps, she tilted her head towards the receiver hooked to one of the straps. " _Alpha to Charlie, will you receive me_?" ' _Here Charlie. I receive strong and clear, Alpha. Step.'_

She croaked the object. " _How's the situation in those parts?"_ _Step_. "

' _We have put roadblocks on the perimeter of the security cordon, no one can enter or leave without realizing it, sir.'_

Haruka nodded as Lieutenant Russell explained to her every single movement made to ensure the highest degree of security inside the cord, within a radius of thirty kilometers of which the school that the Oasis was about to inaugurate was the center.

" _All right, for the moment it seems to me there's nothing left to do."_

Agreed Haruka when Charlie had concluded the explanatory phase. " _The usual recommendations: well-opened eyes and shoot only if absolutely necessary._ '

 _At the checkpoints I only put soldiers who had already done it before, as he had told me. Step._ '

" _Very well._ " The management of the blocks was a rather delicate matter, and among the various provisions on which Haruka did not transact, one was the one that only soldiers with a certain degree of experience were stationed at the outposts: the last thing she wanted was that a frightened boy started to shoot because I panicked about not knowing what to do.

" _It's all, Charlie._ " She then said. " _Alpha closes."_

Haruka pushed a side key and the receiver made a noise before silencing. Now she was close to the small group of children, and shuddered when she recognized the nursery rhyme they had begun to sing.

 _Eeny, meeny, miny, moe Catch a tiger by the toe If he hollers let him go, Eeny, meeny, miny, moe._

She returned to her room in Washington. Her mother was holding her on the legs and tickling her, holding her by the wrists, giving her the impression that he would drop her backwards. And the smile that curved her lips disappeared when in that memory the image of the General insinuated, saying that he no longer wanted to hear that idiotic little song between the walls of his house, and the next quarrel that had been between him and her mother. Only after many years had she understood the reason for Takeshi's annoyance for that nursery rhyme.

She saw Colleen's gaze realize her presence, and in Arabic she addressed the children asking them to greet the Major Tenou together: the chorus of vocabulary did not wait and Haruka rolled her eyes, yet she could not prevent a slight smile peeked out from under the camouflage helmet. "Hello, hello." She said, moving a hand, while Colleen approached her.

"Do you know that this nursery rhyme is born with extremely racist connotations?" The woman tilted her head, crossing her arms.

"It's a little song for kids, Major, and no one here said Negro, if I'm not mistaken." Haruka glanced at the children, who were now dispersing in the company of the other volunteers.

"There is also a version against the Japanese, they sang it during the Second World War." Colleen looked at her puzzled for a second. Then she realized the name of the Major, and the connection hit her in full, leaving behind a slight exclamation of amazement.

"The air is the same, but it did more or less like this: _Eeny, meeny, miny, moe / Catch a Jap by his toe / If he hollers make him say, /" I surrender, USA!_ "" The other did not immediately answer.

"This is beautiful, I did not know it." Haruka smiled, shrugging, and did not reply.

"Say a little, Major, will not you be a bit 'too much today?" Colleen then asked, turning right and left to embrace the whole area of the former barracks with her eyes.

Tenou glanced quickly at the soldiers stationed at the entrance gate, then at those who had dislocated the perimeter of the area, and who looked like they were bored to death.

"Better to be numerous than insufficient, Colleen."

"But what could happen, Major?" Churches, a note decidedly hopeful in the voice.

"Who would be so petty to attack a school?" The look Haruka gave her was not the most encouraging.

"I learned to expect everything in this place, Colleen." She told her flatly, and they remained silent for several moments.

"How come the children are not inside yet?" Asked then Haruka, and Colleen recovered from the discomfort of the response that the military had procured.

"We are waiting for a couple of UNICEF leaders to officially give it to you, and that they would like to talk to you, to thank you."

"Forget it, tell me I'm not there." It was the annoyance, and Colleen laughed.

"And then we're waiting for the balloons." A red light lit in a corner of Haruka's mind. "Balloons?" The other nodded.

"Yes. One of our volunteers is a friend of a guy who owned a toy store once, you know, before Saddam, austerity and everything else, he went to the birthday parties, and he got in the van full of balloons. , with which he made dogs, ducks, that kind of thing that kids like. " Haruka folded her head, receiver in hand.

"Why did not I know anything about it?"

"It was decided at the last moment, the guy did not know if this guy was willing or not to come, but I can assure you that he's okay-"

"I decide who's okay and who's not, Colleen." The frozen Haruka.

"The contingencies never bring anything good."

"You're exaggerating." Cuttered Colleen. "They're just balloons!"

"I hope you're right." She merely told her, before looking for a familiar face among her soldiers. Which she identified after a moment, together with another equally known face.

"Banks!" She called, and he took a moment to leave his interlocutor, reaching Haruka after a slight ride made difficult by the heavy equipment he wore.

"Banks, I need you to go with Colleen," instructed the boy, who nodded. Then he turned to the woman.

"Look for that volunteer, I need the extremes of the vehicle on which your joust will arrive"

"What carousel?" Richard asked, and Colleen spread her arms.

"He's not a carter, he's just a guy who will bring balloons for the kids."

"It's a nice idea, Major." Agreed the boy looking for the eyes of the superior, who rolled her eyes.

"Yeah amazing." Murmured the Major a bit because of the heat, the exhaustion, partly because she could not drive away the very strong worry that had crept into her head at the news of this variable of which she had no direct control. She felt a light step approaching her shoulders, and sensing that the person she belonged to was trying to catch her by surprise, let her do it. She smiled when a pair of hands covered her eyes.

"Guess who?" The female voice broke out, and Haruka shrugged. "I have no idea." She heard a laugh, and her voice lowered.

"Let me see," she began.

"I'm nineteen, I was born in Tikrit and I really like you." Haruka snapped her lips, and taking her hands off her eyes, she turned to look at Samira's gaze.

"It was not funny, missy, was it?"

"Are you still mad at me?" She asked the other, intertwining her hands just above her belly. Haruka remained thoughtful for a long moment.

"I'm not."

"Are you sure?"

"I've said I'm not mad at you, Samira, but I could change my mind if you stay here a bit more." The young Arab gave her a bright smile, her dark eyes equally smiling.

"Where is your chador?" Haruka asked her when she realized what the other one had different. Samira looked down, embarrassed, starting to torment herself with the index of her left hand a dark curl. "Oh, well," she began. Then she spoke in such a low voice that Haruka could not understand her. "What?"

"Richard likes my hair." She repeated in a slightly higher voice, and a smile was painted on Haruka's face.

"So you're totally embracing the western style, now, thanks that fucking moron." Samira smiled at the epithet Haruka had given to Richard, but assuming a fake angry air hit her at the bulletproof vest.

"He's not a moron. He's so nice, and sweet." Tenou smiled as the girl looked for her.

"You were right, Ruka. He's a good boy and he really cares about me."

"I know, I'm always right." She then added, and Samira tilted her head to the side, amused. But she immediately returned seriously.

"But I really, deeply like you and I do not want to make a choice"

"There's no choice, Missy." The other interrupted her, the face an impassive mask. "It's Richard, That's all." Samira did not answer right away, and she could not do it since both Richard and Colleen came back to approach Tenou.

"Major, here's the way you wanted," Banks began, pulling a small notebook out of a uniform pocket under the bulletproof, from which he tore off a sheet of paper that he handed to Haruka: that gave him a quick glance before bringing his hand to receiver and move away a few steps.

"Alpha to Charlie. I need a carpet control on the perimeter for a," she opened the paper, starting to read, "Volskswagen Transporter T3 of '79, white." The receiver was silent, then croaked the answer.

' _Charlie to Alpha. Received, Lord. Any problems?_ '

"I hope not, but if you find him stop him, and search the vehicle before he can get here." He turned back to the triad formed by Colleen, Richard and Samira, and it was not long before the recipient came back to talk. ' _Charlie to Alpha. It seems that the vehicle that has shown us is heading towards you from the south-east. Step_.' Haruka snapped her lips.

" _Route the blocks closer to him. Step._ "

' _But two stations will remain uncovered. Step_ '

" _I know, but I have a bad feeling, I want the absolute certainty that the guy is clean, even disassemble the engine if necessary."_ Half an hour passed, during which Haruka reviewed the provisions of the escort at the Oasis and constantly followed any news coming from Charlie on what they had now renamed the carousel: finally came the communication that the guy was absolutely right, but Haruka could not relax. From the gate to the entrance they communicated the presence of an approaching vehicle, and Richard joined the guards, then pointing out to Tenou, who was the Transporter they were waiting for: the van was allowed to pass, and the small jolt of the half Haruka wondered why no one had thought to pave the ridge immediately after entry. The children approached running the white van from which came out a tall man, dark-skinned and beard sprayed with gray. A few kids clung to the long dress he wore, while smiling he opened the back of the Transporter, revealing cardboard boxes and a helium bottle.

"So, my friend, are you all right?" Haruka asked when she was near, and he looked at her for a moment, immediately looking away. "Do you understand me, huh?" The man looked back at her, and shook his head. He said something in Arabic, touching one of the boxes and the kids shouted for joy.

"Wait up." Haruka put the M16 between the other and the inside of the vehicle, preventing him from entering. "You do not mind if I take a look in here, do you?"

He squeezed, spreading his arms.

I heard Samira's voice a short distance from her, by the hand of a little girl aged four and a half, while the man's gaze, fixed now on the young Arab, turned from amazement to disgust.

"Tell him I do not mind, because I'm a pain the ass." Haruka stepped into the van, remaining bent so as not to bump her head, starting to move the boxes to check the walls and floor of the Transporter.

She opened one, inserting her hand that touched only the smooth and rubbery latex of deflated balloons. She took another look at the floor, then raised her eyes to inspect the inside of the roof. She grabbed the cart that held the helium tank and checked that too. She held back a moment in the middle, turning to the right and left, before deciding to go down.

"Thank you." She murmured wryly to the guy, who nodded, bending his head. It was then that she heard it: a very slight bzz, like the vibrating of a telephone. The man grabbed a handful of balloons from the box and started addressing the children, but Haruka moved it and re-slipped into the van.

She felt that vibration again, while the Arab addressed incomprehensible protests. When she tried to grab her by the bullet-proof jacket Haruka planted the reed of the M16 on her forehead: time froze at that moment, the wide-eyed children who pulled back or clung to the appalling Samira and Colleen.

"Do not touch me." It was Haruka in a dangerously low tone, while a couple of soldiers flocked, leaving their seats near the building. Haruka lowered the rifle and tried to be guided by that slight quiver. He returned to the cart with the helium bottle, which quickly unhooked from the latches and examined carefully. Then she turned her attention to the cart whose plate seemed to touch the ground in the semi-darkness of the vehicle: it turned the wheels in the air, and saw the satellite phone stopped with two large segments of gray tape to the shiny metal.

"What the fuck is this?" She cried, pulling it from the seat, starting to shake her hand. She looked at the man, now held by two soldiers, watching her without emotion. Haruka looked at the object again, and the realization hit her.

"It's a GPS, they were following its position," he murmured.

"Half in approach! Half in approach!" Someone shouted from the gate, and Haruka understood. They controlled it, so they would know where to get around the checkpoints.

"Shit!" She jumped out of the van, while the Arab had bent his head and started to sing something.

"What the fuck is he saying?" She screamed at Samira, who shook her head at the beginning. Then she looked at Haruka dismayed.

"He's praying." Fuck. "Colleen, take the children in. All inside!" She began to run toward the entrance, nodding towards her team.

"Converge! Converge immediately!" She saw the dust raised by the old Toyota approaching at full speed with a zigzag gait to avoid the blows of the guards, but now approaching the entrance.

"Keep shooting!" She ordered, but the car whose hood was now riddled with blows had mowed down a group of soldiers and passed the gate. She knelt down where she was and started shooting, and did not recognize the voice that came out of her lips when she called Banks. Then the Toyota reached the back. The roar was devastating, but Haruka only felt a part of it. Everything became silent around, as the ground grew distant, rushing before her eyes.

And finally came the darkness.

x

Silence. A glow.

 _Haruka? Haruka are you still sleeping?_

A vortex of colors.

 _Violet, Blue, white._

 _Red. Black._

An empty sucking, and incredibly irresistible. Breathe.

As if it were easy.

A furious pulse. That vortex again.

 _Eeny, meeny, miny, moe_

 _Catch a Jap by his toe_

A heartbreaking scream, and then the silence.

 _What the fuck are you doing, Tenou! Standing!_

Still a glow. And a light, blinding. Painful. She understood she had her eyes open.

 _If he hollers make him say, "I surrender, USA!"_

She squeezed them, succumbing to the pain. Which did not come only from the eyes, now. But a little 'everywhere.

 _Allah Akhbar. Allah Akhbar._

She felt everything distant, jerky. As if someone enjoyed raising and lowering the volume. In a flash of conscience he wondered if she had broken gables.

Probable, yes. "Ruka !! Oh my God Ruka !!" That felt good. She tried to turn around, and she succeeded at the cost of immense suffering. She recorded someone's help in the operation, but she was too stunned to even react.

She only opened one eye, and the image of Samira bent over her shaking her, her face stained with tear-stained dust, invaded her offended pupils. "Ruka please! Wake up! Wake up, we have to go!" "Samira ..." she said in a whisper, and she grabbed her by the shreds of what had been her bulletproof vest.

"Ruka stand up, please! We have to go !!" The girl hugged her, and uttered a moan in pain when she managed to lift her torso of weight, seating her. "Richard." She murmured, and a sob came out of the other's lips.

"I do not know, I do not know, Ruka. Please, we need to go.

"Go away, Samira." That was a sensible thing to say. "Leave me here Go away." Continuous.

"Run." The slender body of the other tried to put it on its feet, without success.

"I can not leave you here."

" I can not stand up, damnit! " Samira gave another tug, and realized more pain than usual on the left side of the body. She found herself standing, trying to remember how to put one foot forward one to the other.

"C'mon Ruka." The noises were now slightly more comprehensible, even if those annoying changes in volume were always present. There was no silence, but shouts. Laments. Rapid shots were soon overlapped. He could not figure out what Samira had said, but it seemed to her that she looked like a 'fuck'.

"Go away, missy." But the other in response was tightened even more against her, holding tightly the arm she had put on her shoulders to support her: the shots were interrupted, and the screech of tires announced the arrival of someone.

"I'm with you Ruka." The girl told her, and let the warmth of the other envelop her. But that heat left her at the same time that male voices began to be recorded by her wounded ears. Someone dragged her violently and found herself bumping into the cold metal of what was supposed to be the chest of an old Jeep; the blow took her breath away, and tried to retrieve it by lying on her back. Her eyes crossed the vault of the sky, and the last thing she saw before abandoning herself to the irresistible oblivion that he called her by name was that it was sunny. But it was too bad to watch it.

x

 _53 km to Tikrit,_

 _Iraq,_

 _2008_

I have been waken by iced water. A rough lashing, right on my face.

I close my eyes, blinded by the bright light which overwhelms me; words melted with whispers, my ears still shocked because of the explosion. The explosion. Is it possible, that after what happened, I survived just like that?

A movement behind me brings me on the earth again. I shout of pain, the drawn on the arm which makes me understand I have a serious trauma to my left shoulder.

Maybe it's sprained. No, it's broken. Four strong hands holds me from my wrists, arms tensed toward the dusty floor. The pain deleted all my tireness, and I can see around me: they are six, who looks over us from head to toes, laughing at me and my kneeling position.

The American kneeling ahead them.

That's the end they want to make us. All of them. Four of them have a McGuire, the others two kalashnikov. One of them, who has a long scar all over his eye, scratches his chin and sends hungry looks over another shape at the other side of the room, far from where I am.

My blood stops when I recognise her, and I can see in her eyes her fear because of my shouting.

They see I'm awake again, and one of my prisoners make me look up.

One of them slapped me, the other one spits me, the others just laughed.

Bastard motherfuckers, laughs good who laughs at the end, I thought. Telling it aloud would have just make their ego grow up, because even if I know not all of them would understand, I know at least one of them will. In fact after a while one of them with the kalashnikov asked me:

"Do you know this woman?" Translated me one with a strong Arabian accent, who seems the younger while he pointed the frightened girl on the floor.

"No" is my only answer. I even shake my head. The one who seems to be the leader spoke to him pointing me and the girl.

"Even if she took you out of that place where our brothers shahid are dead to set us free from people like you."

I think again about what happened. I remember a little bit because the darkness overwhelms my mind. "I don't know her, I said."

I look at her right into the eyes, seeing her shocked features.

 _God, don't look at me like that!_

A pair of them laugh at the scene, and the leader speaks to her. I don't understand, but when I see the men pointing at me, I can tell they're Mekong her the same question they did to me. Her look falls on the mask which is my face. The mask which could save her life.

I see her shaking her head, then the other one keeps asking more rudely.

He points at me again and again. They stay quiet for a moment, then the leader walks toward me. After some seconds I have is gun pointing at my head. A thrill runs towards my back, but I keep quiet.

Her eyes instead, are wide open because of the terror. Then he speaks again:

"I'd you don't know him, we can shoot him then?" A sadic smile appears on his face.

But she doesn't stand at it. She's not a soldier, she's not trained for this situations, she cries, while she walks toward me.

 _No! No!_

She said into sobs. One of them started moving to stop her, but someone tells him not to. The gun is still on my head, when she started crying into my dirty uniform, I understand it's over. She can't save herself no more. And she knows it too. Our prisoners laughs, I see one of them taking his McGuire off, followed by one who did the same with his kalashnikov. I can't speak. She does it for me, whispering to me. They take her off of me, throwing her to the wall. The push on my back becomes stronger, the pain on my shoulder almost at the top. A pair of hands takes my head turning it to face her, then they put a knife on my throat. The gun doesn't leave me. I can't move, I can't even shut my eyes.

The horror frightens me, I can't stand at it, i bit my lips making them bleed.

"Slide my throat!" I say while I feel like throwing it all out "slide this fucking throat! Just kill me!"this time I shout, and she hears it too, whispering a weak 'No'

I feel tears in my eyes.

If hell does really exists isn't far from this.

x

It really can not have happened. This is a nightmare.I repeat it constantly, while I fix the wall of my cell, a hole three meters for one closed with some boards. I feel buried alive, so little difference with a niche.They threw me here when they decided that the show was enough: I started to stomach as soon as I touched the ground.

On all fours, in a corner, supported by a rotten shoulder and wrists bound by blood-encrusted chains, I got rid of the bile that poisoned my stomach and my throat.

Now I sit in the dark, a faint light filtering from under the boards. I hear the ticking of a clock.It's a nightmare. It must be.

x

Day and night mix in here.

How much has passed? I feel like I've been in this place for years. They never came to get me, and they left Samira alone. I can not sleep. I can not sleep: if I close my eyes I see them bent over his body. Vultures ready to tear their meat.

And if I sleep I can not think: my mind has to work without interruption, or I'll go crazy. "Haruka?" Hearing to call my name collects me from the numbness that sometimes envelops me and leaves me exhausted; it is difficult for me to understand if someone has really said it or it is only the fruit of my mind.

"Haruka, can you hear me?" I approach the boards, because Samira is really calling me. "Samira," I whisper between the rock and the solid wood, not before I peeked down the corridor, cleared of the militia.

I can almost see her smile, before a sob breaks the silence.

"I'm sorry, Ruka." _Are you ... apologizing?_ "Do not be sorry, missy." I reassure her trying to hide the total amazement that her words left behind.

"Am I disgusting?" I hear her ask, and shake my head even though she can not see me. "You're not, Samira, you're a strong," I interrupt a second, thinking about what I can say to console her.

"Wonderful girl, I'm so proud of you, missy." "Are you?"

"I really am." An oppressive silence surrounds us for a few moments. "Samira," my tone is serious, my mind back to what those beasts have done to her "They can not let them take your soul away. Do not let them do that. "

"They can not." Her voice is a whisper. "They can not be my soul is yours, Ruka."

I abandon myself sitting against the wall, tilting my head backwards. "I love you." I close my eyes, not knowing what to say. "Ruka?"

"I love you too, missy." I answer you after a long moment. And finally the realization strikes me in full: it is not a nightmare. I'm not sleeping. I am awake, and a living walk among the aberrations of the damned souls of hell.

x

"Fuck you."

I scan it well, so that everyone can hear and above all understand.

I see the right start and try to stiffen the jaw, but fuck, it hurts the same. I feel something warm on the cheek, and I imagine that the fist has opened a nice piece of skin on the cheekbone.

I hear one laugh, and when I look up I see why: Samira has turned her head, her eyes closed, unable to support the sight of someone hurting me.

"Read it." It is the young Arab talking, beating hard on a sheet resting on my legs. "Read it and we can also reconsider your situation." I look at the camera positioned on the tripod in front of me, ready to record my little speech about the unfaithful Americans and the invasion of their country, written in good handwriting on the piece of paper lying at the height of my knees.

I can only imagine that behind me, behind the chair on which my wrists and ankles are tied, there are banners and banners praising Allah, who will do their show when the video arrives on all the channels of the United States. But these do not believe in anything, I'm sure now more than ever. Among them the true Sunni Militia will be two, maximum three. Here the scum was collected: bandits, stragglers, fanatics. "Read it!" He tells me in a louder tone. Yeah, for sure. How many more soldiers had been taken prisoner in Iraq, and found with their bodies on one side and their heads on another, even though they had fully embraced the trappings of those who had captured them?

"I was not clear, maybe, F-u-c-k y-o-u." The new fist fills my mouth with blood, which I hold between my tight lips and then I spit violently on the face of my personal Tyson. That says something incomprehensible, and grabs me by the collar of his jacket.

"No!" The voice of Samira draws everyone's attention, and raises some loud laughter. "Shut the fuck up, Samira." I scold her, but she ignores me and starts talking in Arabic. She points at me, touches her chest.

The man behind the camera leans on the chair he was sitting on, listening to her amused. Then he shakes his head, nods at me and spreads his arms, turning to Samira who answers without breaking eye contact with that. He sighs, and after a vague movement of his hand I see Samira disappear with the man with the scar.

The others disperse and I stay there, confused, under the shot of a boy I had never seen before.

x

They asked me again to talk to the camera. I had thought about it a lot, wondering if my yield would somehow help Samira. I dictated the conditions, that if I had said what they wanted they would have to free her.

That I am a Major, and my head is also very much on its own. They laughed in my face, then one of my friends punched me in the stomach that I seriously believed my eyes came out of their sockets, going to rage on the organ already twisted by malnutrition. Samira intervened again, and I realized the leitmotif of her actions: _she is using her body as a bargaining chip, because they do not hurt me_.

I can not hear her anymore: they changed her cell. Now she is in a room you can reach through a narrow gut carved into the rock: they took me when they decided it was time to look again. The cell smells like urine and blood, and now the shoulder pain is something so strong and chronic that I got used to it.

A small wooden strip has come off the boards and I can see the grate on which a small plastic table clock is placed. And from those bars I came back to see the Iraqi sky.

x

They hooded me and dragged me out, making me walk for a seemingly endless time. The sweat impregnates my worn out uniform, and I wonder where we are going. When I remove the black cloth from my head, the sun blinds me violently: it takes me a moment to identify all the figures arranged in a circle on the dusty esplanade; circle of which I find myself inside, along with Samira, their leader and the Arabic who speaks English.

I can not help but scrutinize her face: she is tried, thinner. Yet proud, like her gaze that now seeks mine: I could not bend it.

They have not taken away the soul, and my lips bend upwards when that thought strikes me. After a moment's hesitation, Samira answers my smile. The hands of the Arab with the long scar on the eye forcefully push her shoulders, forcing her to kneel. The leader starts talking and one, after freeing me from the chains, grabs my right hand, leaving a semiautomatic palm in the palm.

"Kill her."

The voice of the translator comes without many preambles, and I look at him as if he had said a crap of epic proportions. The other continues to chat in his language unknown to me, gesticulating.

"If you want her well, kill her."

I look at the gun, then the young man again. Samira watches me impassive, despite the order given to me by that I had clearly seen her hold her breath. They are putting me to the test.

They want to blow my nerves completely. I let the weapon fall, the thud muffled by the sand.

"Give me that sheet." I almost murmur. "But let her go."

"Haruka, no!" She exclaims, but is kept in her place by her jailer. The Arab speaks again. "You do not say conditions." I am explained for the umpteenth time.

"And now we do not want any videos, you have to kill her, Major." A militiaman approaches quickly and puts the gun in my hand. "It's burnt now," he continues. "It's dirty, it's impure, it has no future." Anger crosses my veins with blood, and without thinking I raise the weapon in front of me towards the first one that happens to me: in less than no time everyone raises their Kalashnikovs, and a cry comes from Samira's lips when the cold metal of two reeds lean violently on my neck, a third on my skull.

"Ruka, please ..." whispers, a tear to rub her face. Also the scarred pointed at the Kalashnikov against it, leaving it free from its grip. The eye is one with the semiautomatic viewfinder. The metal is planted deep in the skin, but I do not care. A blow, and we end it once and for all. "Haruka!" Call Samira again, starting to crawl towards me. The soldier with the scar screams something, and holding the weight of the weapon with one hand tries to block it with the free one. But at one of my slight movements he holds her again with both limbs, forgetting Samira.

"What do you think you're doing?" Their leader challenges me by the translator's mouth. "Eight against one. At the first blow, the brain will blow your nose." I squeeze my eyes, my mind invaded by a million useless variables. Then I lower the weapon, but none of them comes off the back of my head.

"Kill her, then we'll think about the video."

I do not answer, trying to understand if there is even a chance to get by. Tell them that you are a woman.

Sure. The surprise effect could give me enough time to unload the magazine on as many bodies as possible, and try to escape with Samira.

 _It's crazy. But I do not have time to say, or do, anything_. In a moment Samira is standing and approaching me, taking advantage of the impasse in which we find ourselves. Her hands grab mine holding the gun, and our eyes meet for a very good instant: what upsets me is the smile that bends just lips up. "I love you, Ruka."

The shot silences the shouts of the militia, and I look dismayed at the blood stain spread on her dress, at the stomach: in a reflection I leave the gun and the embrace, not to drop the body but, rather, help her to collapse .

The pain does not want to go out, and it implodes me inside, leaving behind an unconscious tremor that does not make me speak; I strain myself, but the voice does not come out. Rest a moment to look at the corpse, the mouth still bent in the last smile. And in my mind the moments of when I found her inside that house in Tikrit resurface with violent arrogance.

"Do not be afraid, Samira." I mumble brushing her hair, before they rip me away from her and incappuccino me again.

 _I thought I could not hurt you._

 _x_

 _They are agitated._

They loaded me on a Jeep and I have the impression that we are wandering aimlessly. Sometimes we stop, to rest and eat.

One came near me while the others were asleep, and asked me in English why I did not have a beard: I explained to him that I have a hormonal dysfunction, and that I grow very slowly.

He seemed rather confused, but he left without asking me anything. It is an excuse that I have often used and to which many believe.

I see her face continually, and remorse closes my stomach. I killed her. It was all my fault from the beginning. If I had prevented her from becoming attached to me, if I had prevented her from loving me, she would now be alive. It was only my fault. The familiar noise of a helicopter enters my ears, and I hear them start screaming from the back of the Jeep. I hear bursts of machine guns, and the unmistakable sound of the engine of several Humvee in the distance.

 _Our people arrive, bastards._

A roar not far away and I find myself upside down, banging on the ground and rolling on the sand. I scream in pain when I fall on my shoulder, but I need my arm, damn it. I have to tighten my teeth. Excitement and adrenaline will help me. I take off the hood and at my sight opens the backlit shape of the Apache that must have unhooked the grenade, while the Humvee approach.

There are also a couple of Black Hawks in the distance, from which reinforcements are coming down. The cowards escape, but it does not end this way. It can not end this way. I come back to the side of the overturned Jeep, and effortlessly - despite the wrists tied - I pull off a bar of full iron already half torn that was on the back of the vehicle, acting as a parapet. Start running, immediately identifying the scarred who is looking for shelter to a low house that must have been a point of control of the army at the time of the dictatorship. From behind another Jeep arises an armed type of Kalashnikov, who flies against a burst.

I devote my path, running in a zig zag I avoid the blows. I play the improvised cork with both hands, the adrenaline pumped in the veins that makes the pain disappear: the iron is knocked down on his arms first, to disarm it, and then on the jaw in a cracky sound. I retrace my steps while I hear the shouts of the soldiers of the United States Army, and running towards the shed I see my fellow soldiers shooting and stopping the militiamen who tried to disperse.

I slip into the low building, which has no other exit: the scarred is trapped, and I understand from his expression that he realizes it. When he realizes my presence, he tries to defend himself, and throws himself at me. With a blow on the arm, we disarm him, but he is quick, the son of a bitch, and I find myself under his weight, the iron bar away. He punches me, and when he puts one hand on my chest to launch another, he stops. He opens his eyes, looking at me: he holds my hand on my breast, and he hears it.

 _How disgusting._

It's the right moment to take advantage of it: my head hits his nasal septum violently, and driving the sick arm with her healthy arm, she knocks her hands together and pulls her clenched fists on his ear. It takes off from me, and I can stand up, even recovering the bar. Even the bastard has resumed his kalashnikov and tries to shoot me, but it is too late: the iron has already impacted on his skull.

x

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _13 June 2008_

 _Day 0_

 _6.36 am_

"He collapsed immediately, but I continued to hit him until his head became a bloody pulp of bones and brain matter that allowed me to no longer have that scar in front of my eyes, he had been the first to rape her and inside me I had sworn: or I would die, or he would die. No doubt. "

The sun was rising outside, and a timid light began to enter the large window of Haruka's apartment, still lying on the ground and lost in the last lines of the story that had been going on for several hours, now, without interruption.

On the television, CNN had started broadcasting the morning news for six minutes.

"The soldiers who entered the little house had to threaten to shoot me if I had not left the bar. Adrenaline prevented me from having a normal capacity for discernment, and only after a long time did I manage to tell them my name, my rank and the battalion of When they took me to the Black Hawk, to take me to Baghdad, they told me they were from the Third Infantry Division stationed at Kirkuk air base, and I knew we had always moved north. " Haruka sighed deeply, and slowly she sat up, then resting her back on the sofa, finding herself facing the girl who had silently heard her all that time: she did not have the courage to look into those blue eyes, for fear to read you a disgust that you did not believe could have endured.

She turned her head back, before continuing.

"Now you know who Haruka Tenou is, Michiru." She felt exhausted. Empty. But free, in a sense. Now the only unknown factor was the doctor's reaction, but regardless of how that would absorb what she had said, now she knew.

And the weight that had weighed down her heart for so long had been dissolved; not completely gone, but diluted in the river of words that alone had decided to go out in the open air, driven by a despair that had previously supported her, now dragged her exhausted. The silence enveloped both of them, and Michiru looked at her for a long moment, her arms fastened around the knees on which she held her chin. She could not give a name to what she felt, because the succession of emotions that the story had aroused, one that chased the other in a kind of infinite domino, now had replaced a chasm that had swallowed everything.

She had so many questions she did not know where to start, and she finally concluded she would not even start. _Samira, Richard, the attack. The violence_ that Haruka had been forced to attend and that had been poured on her psychologically. She could not even remotely come to understand what it might have been to live those moments, but while the other was talking she had found herself with her, in that cell. She had been with her when in the last gesture of that all-encompassing love that the young Shia must have felt for Tenou, she had given up death, and Haruka had blamed her. And the horror of the offenses suffered by Haruka's eyes, mind and body had become unbearable, engulfing all sorts of other feelings.

Although it hurt her that the other carefully avoided looking at her. She moved from the pose she had never left in the last hours, and picking up the movement Haruka wondered if the other was not getting up to leave: a certain amazement came to her mind when she felt the body of the doctor next to her, and bending her head she saw her close, kneeling beside her legs.

"You should have told me." Michiru murmured to her, and, following the unstoppable impulse to touch her, placed a hand on her decorated shoulder.

"You should have told me right away, Haruka, I was here."

"I just wanted to forget." She answered softly. "I wanted to erase everything, do not think, I was so tired, Michiru." She covered her eyes with one hand, "but at any moment I saw her, I saw the loculus, and what had happened inside, and then, damn it," she interrupted, and waved a hand in a vague gesture toward the doctor, shaking the head.

"We missed you, you came, and you messed up all the plans." A slight smile bent Michiru's lips, and the other took her head in her hands, hiding her face against her knees to hide her in the eyes of the doctor. "My God, how much I hated you, Michiru, I hated you from feeling sick, because if before the silence was an illusionary palliative, you thwarted my every effort to relegate everything in a deep corner of my head." The girl listened to her without interrupting her, remembering the first times of the cure: the indifference of that perfect face that did nothing but ignore it, if not for some sporadic arrow.

She had not understood that riot was stirring behind it. "If first silence was something natural, with you it had become something I had to force myself to, and I still have to understand it, "she raised her head, and the emerald eyes looked back into the girl's blue irises. "Talking to you was something I felt natural. Something quite normal for me, that normality did not even know what it was. "

The other paused, and Michiru tried not to show how much that other confession had surprised her. Then Haruka snapped her lips, and the emerald gaze was lost in an indefinite point in the living room.

"To attack you was something I will never regret enough."

"Haruka," the doctor started, shaking her head, but Tenou spoke again. "After what happened to Samira, after what I had done for Becky, I had reduced myself to no longer distinguishing reality from the products of my mind and attacking you, just you, who wanted to help me, that you were helpless."

"You came back there that day." She reminded her of Michiru, now aware of the many Haruka's attitudes. "You swap me for one of your jailers, do not you?" She looked at her for a moment, then nodded. And further realization hit the girl, after having thought about it for a moment. "That's why you did not want to come to the hospital after we left you." Haruka nodded again, after a long moment of motionlessness. "When I realized that I had tried to kill you," she went on to say, "I realized that I had touched the bottom, and that there was no hope, I wanted everything to end, Michiru, but you practically took me by the collar, and pulled away from the darkness in which I wanted to disappear. " Michiru just smiled, and stretched her fingers to take Tenou's: the other reacted unexpectedly to the gesture, fading and almost violently moving her hands.

"It's all right." Michiru reassured her, but Haruka's eyes widened.

"But how can you still touch me, how can you want to touch me?" She asked incredulously.

"My hands are dirty, Michiru, smeared with blood, they are stained with horrible actions." But Michiru shook her head, and intertwined her fingers with those of the other.

"Your hands are very beautiful, Haruka." She said in a smile, and she looked at her in a low tone. The girl came closer, and instinctively Haruka pressed herself against the seat of the sofa, which prevented her to move back more.

"Michiru, but did you understand what I did?" She asked in a murmur. "I killed an innocent girl, I-"

"No, Haruka. She smiled at you. " Michiru interrupted her. "She smiled at you because it was you, you who in a certain sense brought her back to life, from different points of view." The doctor explained, and Haruka looked at her confused. "She knew it was the end, but she also knew that your life would depend on you, and between them, for you, your existence was worth much, much more."

"I do not-"

"She forced your finger on the trigger because she was aware that you would never have been able to do it of your own free will." Michiru continued, astonished by the lucidity with which she managed to make that analysis, after the sleepless night and the amount of information nothing short of devastating that she had acquired. "And she smiled, Haruka, because her soul would have been, finally, really yours." She looked at Tenou, who had no reaction for a long moment, until she closed her eyes.

She reopened them after endless moments, releasing two tears that slid slowly down her cheeks.

"How strange," she whispered to the sensation on her face, her broken voice. "I had never been able to cry." The doctor reached out and placed it on her face, letting her thumb wipe the salty liquid that moistened her cheek.

She crossed the green eyes of the other, perhaps now free from all that suffering, and read a certain loss.

"Michiru," Haruka murmured, serious. "I'm a freak, I'm a joke of nature." But the girl did not stop caressing her face, shaking her head. "If you are a joke of nature, then it is nature that has something wrong." The words went out in deafening silence, and Haruka winced. She put her hand to her mouth to stifle the hideous sob that had risen to her lips, but could not prevent others from breaking against the palm. And it happened, finally: the shell had cracked. And it had fallen, letting go of everything that Haruka had repressed to the limit of violence. Leaving that she was finally able to experience every emotion, from which she had distanced herself to defend herself.

A Pandora's box, from where the pain was the first to break free. Michiru felt her heart shatter in seeing her like that, totally naked in the fragility that she had always hidden behind an impassive mask sometimes, ironic and Gascon other; fragility that repressed even now that he covered his face with her hands, unable to support the shame of those tears. Something snapped in her head, and decided she would not abandon it.

That maybe Haruka did not realize it yet but needed her as much as she needed the other. She extended her arms and she squeezed her to her chest, as had happened in the corridor of the 'Four Seasons', letting it vent from bathing tears loving the fabric of the sweatshirt: the other did not oppose and indeed, let herself go in that embrace.

Michiru stroked her hair for as long as the other felt the need to free herself and even later, when Haruka, despite having held back her tears, did not leave her. And with amazement, she felt Tenou's lips touch her neck. He did not dare to move, and although the mind wondered what was right to do, the heart prevented her in every way to reject it while the lips went up to the chin line leaving behind light kisses; the warm breath of Haruka approaching her mouth until the thin distance that separated them did not dissolve.

Tenou's lips moved slowly on her own, and although she was struggling not to close her eyes, she had to yield to the suction of what was no longer the void felt until a short time before, but of the sensations that the soft lips of the other they were taking with them. She felt her fingers brush against her face, and in a fast movement that caught her by surprise - but to which she did not rebel, she found herself lying on her back, her arms at the side of her head, held firm by the hands of the other. _Amazement. Uncertainty. Attraction._ Suspended in a whirl of confused emotions, she clearly perceived her body reacting to that situation, and the same excitement she had felt seeing Haruka in uniform returned to visit as the other's tongue touched her lips, and she tried to insinuate herself.

 _Fear. Torment. Passion._

She opened them, and waited.

"MOM!!" Haruka's eyes widened, and the cry from the ringing voice opened a gash in the heavy blanket of confusion that had surrounded her the instant the first tears had left her eyes.

 _Mom?._ She realized the presence of the body beneath her, the hands that held the wrists of Michiru, who in the meantime had opened her eyes and looked as lost as she was.

"Hotaru ..." the doctor murmured, turning her head towards the corridor door.

 _It is Michiru. Shit, it's Michiru! What the fuck did you do, Haruka?_

"Mom!" The scream was plaintive now, and Tenou realized that, somewhere in her apartment, there must also be the daughter of her psychologist.

"Oh fuck, oh fuck, fuck!" She moved quickly away from Michiru and jumped up, stumbling almost to the low table as he stepped back as quickly as possible. "Haruka wait," the other called when she sat down, but Tenou put a hand in her hair and ran to the table, grabbing the bunch of keys that was on it: in an instant it was out of the apartment, the door that closed loudly behind her.

Alone, on the ground in Tenou's living room, she realized in an instant what had happened: they had kissed. Michiru tried to process it while touching her lips with her fingers, still soaked with the taste of Haruka. But she did not have much time to think about it, because the girl's voice returned to her ears again.

She ran into her room and found her sitting on the bed, her lower lip splayed out to the brink of anger, ready for a crying spasm. "Here I am love, I am here, all right." She began to cradle her, after embracing her. "Everything is alright."

"But-but where are we?" Asked Hotaru still dazed by sleep, hands clinging to Michiru's sweatshirt.

"Do not you remember, honey?" She asked her, and when she shook her head, she smiled. "We're at Haruka's house." Hotaru's purple eyes widened dramatically.

"Really? And why?" _Because she had a panic attack, the result of the repression and denial of a series of psychological violence of which she was the victim in Iraq. Um, no. It was not the right answer, albeit the right one._

"Because Haruka has bad dreams, and he could not sleep." The child did not answer, and after rubbing her eyes, she began to look on the bed.

"Where's Luna?" She asked in panic. "She's not home alone, is she? Luna is scared!" Michiru looked around, and remembered seeing the rag doll in Hotaru's hands when she picked her up and loaded her in the car. She went back to the chest of drawers where she had left her jacket, and turning it she saw the pink ear of the bunny sticking out of her right sleeve: she must have been trapped when she had undressed the little girl.

"No, baby, here she is, she's not home alone." A big smile was stamped on Hotaru's round little face, who hugged the little doll to her chest and settled back peacefully on Tenou's bed. Michiru stroked her face and watched her go back to sleep, unaware of everything that had happened a short distance from her.

x

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

 _13 June 2008_

 _Day 0_

 _9,43 am_

She sat on the floor, occasionally pushing one of the shiny white keys.

 _Sol. Mi. Does._

The cup lay abandoned on the table: Michiru smiled when, opening the pantry door, she had found several boxes of green tea. Hotaru still slept, which was strange for her; but what had just passed was an intense night, where even the little girl had been quite upset, tossed to the right and left.

She just jumped at the sound of the key in the lock, and got up from the piano as Haruka came into the house, a helmet in one hand, the uniform jacket in the other, and she threw herself badly on the couch. Tenou stopped when she saw her, stretching her fingers to touch the handle, and then pushing the door to close it.

"Oh, you're still here." She seemed surprised.

"I was worried," Michiru justified. "And Hotaru is still asleep and we're leaving as soon as we can-"

"It's not for that." Haruka interrupted her, placing the helmet next to the cup of tea. "I did not see your car."

"The parking gate was closed tonight, I left it in the parallel." Haruka nodded, and without looking at her, went to the kitchen. Michiru did not inquire further, imagining how the other should feel: first the total bare of her feelings, then that kiss. She had thought about it a lot, and realized that this had been, for Haruka, something very similar to a catharsis: a natural consequence of the events of the night. It was impossible for her to believe that it had been anything else, in light of the reaction that Tenou had had as soon as she realized it.

The return of the other in the living room interrupted the swarm of thoughts; she looked at her pale face and her dug, tested eyes. Yet brighter, if possible. She took a deep breath, and when Haruka passed close to her, Evian's inevitable bottle in hand, to head to one of the chairs next to the table, she realized that this was a tooth that had to be removed immediately.

"Listen Haruka-"

"No, hear me." She stopped her by placing her free hand on the back of the furniture, eyes in her eyes.

"I'm not a supplicant person, and you've probably even figured it out." She began to tell her, and when the bottle was empty she squeezed the plastic, deforming it, throwing it on the table. "I never prayed higher entities - if they ever really existed, I never prayed to my jailers, nor did I ever begged other people to do anything, I usually order." She bent her head a moment, before returning to look at the doctor. "But now please, Michiru, please forgive the _bullshit_ I do not understand, and I beg your pardon."

 _Ah here. A bullshit that you can not understand. Sure._

Michiru heard a stinging note in Tenou's voice, and drove away that thought when she spoke again. "I need your friendship, and I do not want a senseless gesture to send everything to hell.

"It was a completely natural thing, Haruka."

"Natural a cock!" She almost shouted at her, and Michiru was surprised by the reaction. Then she crossed her arms to her chest. "Do not raise your voice with me, Major Tenou. Haruka narrowed her eyes, and after a moment she looked away from the doctor. They stood still for a long moment, until Michiru decided it was time to take matters into their own hands, if they wanted to solve it: she approached her, and when she saw Tenou walk away, she grabbed her forearms and brought her back to her.

"You were upset, Haruka, and very simply, I was there, that kiss was the all-natural channeling of the emotions that stirred you inside." Haruka thought about it, then looked at her in dismay.

"And it does not bother you a little?" The question would have deserved careful analysis: certainly that had disturbed her, but certainly not in the sense that the other implied. What should she say, when it was clear that the other should not have been a very exciting experience? She ended up smacking her lips, rolling her eyes.

"Good heavens, Haruka, I went to college, and I also went to parties that the brotherhoods organized inside the dorms, how much do you think I could be scandalized by a kiss between women?" A faint smile bent Haruka's lips, erasing her expression. A sincere smile, serene. "I'm not the Immaculate Virgin you believe." She then added, and Tenou leaned towards her.

"Well, I never thought about that one."

Michiru smiled, and stood up on her toes to hug her: the other stiffened at first, then she felt Haruka's hands resting on her waist, and her forehead on her shoulder. Neither of them found anything to say: there had been enough of words for that day. The creak of the door of the corridor led them away, and Hotaru - dressed in white pajamas with cows - peeked into the living room, the curious look that darted from one object to another of the unknown or environment.

"Hi Angel!" Michiru greeted her, taking a few steps towards the girl who, in response, ignored her completely to run and cling to Haruka's leg.

"Hi Haruka!" She screamed at the top of her lungs, and Haruka closed one eye, disturbed by the sudden cry.

"Hello wren."

"Hotaru, do not bother Haruka," Michiru began to say, but Haruka shook her head, waving a faint wave of her hand. The girl detached herself from the leg and began to inspect the living room, running first to the piano, then to the television, the sofas, the bookcase, without stopping to accompany her actions with numerous variations of 'Look, mother!'.

"Well, from an _overexcited teenage_ girl could not get out a _hyper-excited elf._ " Michiru shook her head at Haruka's statement, which had left her chair, her elbow on the table so that her hand could hold her head; she looked like one who would fall asleep at any moment.

"What a beautiful house!" Hotaru exclaimed when she was again near Tenou, who looked at her.

"Do you like?" The little girl nodded. Then she became thoughtful.

"Mom says you're having bad dreams." Haruka glanced quickly at Michiru, before answering.

"She's right, thank you for coming to keep me company." She told her seriously, and Hotaru smiled, clearly flattered by the thanks. "Where's your mom?"

"She died a long time ago."

"And a dad do you have it?" Hotaru urged her.

"Honey, Haruka is tired," Michiru tried to intervene, but Haruka shook her head. "It's okay, Michiru." Then she turned back to the girl.

"My dad does not want me." Hotaru looked at her without understanding. "What does it mean?"

"That he wanted a different child, and instead he had me." The child was silent for a long moment. Then she hopped up, realizing what Haruka wanted to say.

"The stork was wrong?" Haruka looked at her, and could not help but laugh.

"Yes, I would say yes." Hotaru climbed on one of the chairs, then sitting down on the table in front of it.

"My dad is in heaven and my mom is an angel." Michiru winced at that phrase that Hotaru almost said the same by reciting, and Haruka looked at the baby.

"I know, Hotaru, and you're right, your mum is just an angel." A big smile spread over Hotaru's face, before she was lifted up by Michiru.

"Do not get on people's table, Hotaru, do not be rude." She scolded her good-naturedly, then kissed her forehead. "Let's go home, now, let's leave Haruka to sleep." Haruka smiled at the loud protests that the communication aroused, and the child struggled so much that Michiru was forced to put it back on the floor: as soon as she touched it, Hotaru ran to the couch.

"Where do you keep your medicines?" She asked Haruka, who pointed straight ahead in an indefinite spot in the sleeping area. Michiru supposed they were in the bathroom and took her by the hand, accompanying her to the bedroom.

"Hotaru, can you help me put Haruka to sleep?" The little girl did not have to repeat it twice and reached Tenou in the bedroom, where Michiru also returned with a capsule, a glass of water and the phone of that in her hand.

She smiled at Hotaru's attempts to remove Haruka, sitting on the bed, the tie - and to the same number of attempts by the latter not to die stifled, and sat next to that one not before she had put everything she had in her hands on the bedside table. "I do not think you'll have trouble sleeping, but if you had to take this," she explained, pointing to the capsule. "And I want you to call me as soon as you wake up."

"All right, doc." Haruka was so exhausted that she did not argue much about the nursing treatment that her doctor was reserving.

"Hey Haruka!" She called Hotaru, and the girl waited to lie down.

"Hold on!" Tenou looked puzzled at the rag doll suspended between them, then looked at the girl. "Luna helps me when I have bad dreams." She was absorbed for a moment. "She's scared too, but then we sleep with mom." Hotaru hopped on the bed and put Luna on the pillow, and Michiru looked at her in surprise as she took that action. She let Haruka lie on the mattress before standing up and taking Hotaru in her arms, reinfiling her jacket over her pajamas.

When she left the room, Haruka was already sleeping heavily with Luna, who watched her with her mother-of-pearl gaze from the pillow beside her; and Michiru hoped that that sleep was finally free of nightmares.

x

 _Portsmouth, Virginia_

' _Michiru Kaioh, 11:30 am on June 13, 2008. Day_ ...' she paused, looking up at the scattered sheets of Haruka's file and the numerous boxes placed on the floor, lined up on the living room floor.

Each one day was different from the other's therapy: she was fifty-three. Logically, that of today must have been fifty-four, but in reality that night had unraveled the intricate skein that was the genesis of everything. '... _Day zero._ ' She then said, and the recorder captured the silence of the house in the tape. Hotaru had left with Usagi, Mamoru and Chibiusa: the Chiba family had planned a picnic at the park on the beautiful day, and the decline of the invitation on her part had insisted that the child would go with them, so she could stay at home to rest. Especially after receiving a quick explanation of the events that had involved Tenou.

She resumed talking, starting with what had happened at the Four Seasons and then, in a chain, everything that Haruka had finally revealed to her about imprisonment. And she cried. She cried so much that she thought she would not be able to do it for the rest of her life, because that morning she had certainly run out of tears.

Haruka had been supported by a force that had not been able to explain, perhaps triggered by the desire to be for the other one-literally-shoulder on which to let off steam at least decent. But now, alone, it was different. She turned the horror told by Tenou into the little tape recorder, and they now closed the picture of her psychological profile. For her, however, there was nothing closed.

On the contrary, everything had become open. Wide open, to say the least. Lost in the images that formed in her mind, exhausted by the sleepless night and the weight of what she had learned, the awareness came to light, investing in full; he did not even bother to turn off the tape even though she had finished her narration. _'I'm falling in love with one of my patients,'_ she murmured in silence. _'I'm falling in love with my patient woman'._

 **Author's notes: So, it's been a long time since my last update of this fic, I'm honoured you all are liking and supporting me in keeping writing, thanks. Hope you like it, see you next time.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything at all ;)**

 **Chapter (finally) 14: Babele**

Portsmouth, Virginia,  
February 2005,

She watched the circular movement of the teaspoon inside the cup of tea, and compared that vortex to the swarm of thoughts that stirred in her head at that moment.  
"I made tea," she said softly, looking out of the kitchen door to address the figure sitting on the couch, legs stretched out over a small pouffe of the same color of the sofa, and distractedly zapping on sports channels. "Do you want some, Mitsuo?"  
The boy did not answer, and Michiru sighed; after putting the spoon in the dishwasher, she picked up the cup and headed for the living room: Mitsuo had interrupted the fast succession of channels, to focus on an old Chicago Bulls game on ESPN Classic.

"I put some of the baby things in the washing machine, as soon as she wakes up, just send it." She communicated to him by sitting next to him; that just nodded, and the silence fell between them.

"How you feel today?" She then asked, and Mitsuo snapped his lips.

"How do you want me to feel? Same as yesterday, the day before yesterday and the day before." It was ironic, without looking at her. "Stop asking me always."  
"I have to ask you why you do not talk, Mitsuo." Michiru retorted, leaving the cup of tea on the magazine rack next to the sofa. "I have no feedback from you, and if you do not talk to me, I can not tell if the theraphhy works, or psychotherapy is helping you."  
"Do you think they're helping me?" He turned, and the boy's pale iris crossed those of Michiru, of the same color. "I'm stuffed with psychotropic drugs, Michi, I get so many that I can not even keep Hotaru in my arms without being afraid to drop her." He took his legs off the pouf, and sitting down, he put his face in his hands. "And with what result, uh?" He murmured. "The end of this tunnel I just can not see it."  
Michiru embraced him, resting her head on his curved shoulder.

"It's a long way, Mitsuo, but we'll get out." She told him gently. "We'll make it."  
"I'm sorry," the voice was broken. "I'm disappointing you, I'm disappointing everyone."  
"You're not letting us down, Mitsuo," she consoled him, rubbing his back. "I do not want you to think this, but I want you to focus on that wonderful little bundle that sleeps in the other room, and you're the fantastic dad."  
Mitsuo looked for her gaze, his eyes veiled with tears. "I am a horrible person, Michiru, I am ashamed of myself."  
The other included the link.

"Do you still think about that thing you told me?"  
The boy was silent for a long moment, before nodding. Michiru shook her head. "It is the Disorder that makes you think about this, Mitsuo, it's a distortion of reality, on which you do not have to focus anyway."  
"But if it were true?"  
The girl snapped her lips.

"It's absurd, I was here, do you think I would have been silent if I had the slightest suspicion?"  
Mitsuo did not answer and breathed a sigh, letting himself go into the girl's embrace. "I'm sorry, Michi," he told her again, and the other kissed him on the black mop. "I know, Mitsuo, but I'm here to help you, we're all here to help you."  
The boy sniffed, snatching a smile at Michiru, who glanced at the clock as she untied his embrace.

"I have to go now, I left you the medicine near the sink, do not forget to take it, okay?"  
Mitsuo nodded, and he watched her greet him with a wave of her hand and a smile on her face. When Michiru was gone beyond the threshold and the door was closed behind him, he got up and went to the kitchen, where the four capsules of the morning round lay waiting to deceive his nervous and endocrine system, giving him a shallow calm.

While underneath, in depth, the strongest currents stirred. He took all four of them in his hand and opened the dustbin, hurrying to the operation when he heard the hallway door open.

 _"Edward Dewenish VA Medical Center" Military Hospital_  
 _Portsmouth, Virginia,_  
 _June 20, 2008_ ,

The days slipped away slowly. Lazy, like every self-respecting summer day.  
Enjoying the warmth of the early afternoon sun, the salad that was her lunch laid on her knees but forgotten by an increasingly evanescent appetite, she wondered, squinting her eyes, turning them towards the star, if the sun of Iraq burnt at the same way.  
Iraq that had been the center of a mysterious world, with the name of Babylon, and that had ignited the thirst for knowledge and adventure in a young prince of a kingdom of ancient Greece. Alexander of Macedonia, then became Great. _The great._  
The burning became unsustainable, and was forced to look away: after a brief moment needed to metabolize too much light absorbed, the familiar figure of the Dewenish park once again opened, where very few patients, given the time, They were.

Three boys were busy talking on the bench furthest from her: she identified only one, like a patient from Samuel; the other two were unknown to her.  
A slight smile bent her lips up when she saw the highest of the three gently caress the nape of the young man who sat close, listening to him nodding while he crossed one leg and gesticulated in the direction of the patient.  
A couple of benches back, closer to the hospital entrance, two nurses on the afternoon shift must have had the same idea. He stood there for a moment, watching them talking to each other, sensing how occasionally they looked at her furtively.  
She wondered if there was any new gossip in the hospital about her, except for what Mamoru's mistress was doing, and Haruka came back to her powerfully.  
As if she could think of something different from her in those days.  
Michiru sighed, reflecting on the situation that had been created: on the one hand clinically unexceptionable, with the events of the now famous ' _Zero Day'_ in which she had become aware of Samira, key to a corner of the psyche of Haruka that was going gangrene, infected by unrepeatable horrors, but who had launched a cry for help in the form of the panic attack.

After the confession the river Tenou was now certainly more malleable, and although it still flaunted on several occasions that impassive mask that it hoped had remained under the rubble of that wall that with so much tenacity had managed to break down, were back to talk about the events of the day of ' attack; of that twenty-seven of January, which had also been the day Tenou had turned twenty-eight.  
The Samira argument, on the other hand, had not been dealt with. As well as another question, which led directly to what took away sleep: a perfect clinical path, in fact, was opposed to a tortuous emotional path, comparable to a mule track.  
The sensation of the lips of the other on her own had become something hard to annihilate, as well as the image of Haruka above her, on the floor of the living room, which had often peeped into her thoughts.  
That euphoric excitement returned again and Michiru shook her head, won by the idea that she liked Tenou.

That Tenou attracted her in all her form and appearance, but also that that kiss had died at the same time as she had seen the light, and it liquidated just as quickly a few hours later. They had not talked about it anymore, and Haruka did not seem to feel the need for it. _Perhaps it was the best thing_ , she tried to convince himself.  
"Do you know that you are very beautiful when you are absorbed?"  
The flow of thoughts stopped, and arching an eyebrow, she turned to the source of the unexpected distraction, finding herself looking into Dr. Foster's gray irises. "What were you thinking about?"  
Michiru shrugged. "To what moves the sun and the other stars "."  
Samuel looked at her without understanding, then smiled. "And I was hoping to think of how to thank me," he said, sitting down next to her. Michiru crossed her arms to her chest, a curious air painted on her face.

"Let's hear, what should I thank you for?"

"For warning you from Tenou, and opening your eyes to his real intentions."  
Michiru looked at him for a long moment, then shaking her head began to close the plastic package that had contained her lunch: it was granted a pause too long. "You really have a great imagination."  
"It does not take much imagination to figure out what Tenou wants from you," Samuel replied, the smile still on his beautiful face, and Michiru could not help but her lips bent upwards. "It's really funny." Haruka told me the same phrase about you. "  
The other tilted his head, without answering, and while Michiru stretched to throw her waste in the nearby recycling bin, in her peripheral view returned the three boys who had spotted shortly after her arrival.

"Who are those two with your patient?" She then asked, indicating with a gesture the bench on which they sat.

"One is the brother, the other is," he paused, thoughtfully, " _his companion_."  
She seemed to perceive a certain note of disgust in Foster's words, and leaned back on the bench, bringing her face to the back of her hand to look for the other's gaze.

"You know, now that I think about it, it's not the first time I see them, they come to see him often, but I never would have said they were-"  
"Fags?" He suggested the doctor, and a puzzled expression appeared on the girl's face. He was not wrong. "No, homosexuals." She pointed.  
"Where's the difference?"  
"That I am not homophobic, as opposed to you." _And indeed, to be honest, I have fantasies about a woman. Do a little bit._  
Samuel snapped his lips. "I'm not homophobic, but I find them just nice."  
Michiru did not miss the irony in the words of the other, who turned to look at her. "What's more, in addition to being a paladin of unbalanced ladders, you're also a champion of gays now?"  
"It's not a question of being a paladin, I simply do not like prejudices."  
"Sometimes certain prejudices are not so wrong." Foster retorted. "We confirm it every day, military are not the tin heads they say?"

"There are soldiers who would sometimes prefer to face the Martial Court, rather than do what is ordered to them, Samuel."  
The doctor remained silent. "Is your Tenou among those?"  
"As far as I know, Haruka has often walked on the edge of the razor," she answered cryptically, and Samuel snapped her lips. "Then behind that beautiful face there is also a brain, who would have thought it."  
"Samuel," Michiru was annoyed, and the other shook his head. "Okay, I'm sorry, I did not come to argue." The boy raised the white flag, who started talking only after a long moment. "Listen, I behaved like a real jerk, and I regret it, I did not have the right to judge your choices."  
Michiru did not feel much touched by those excuses, although Samuel seemed quite sincere. "And also the whole matter of the Red Cross nurse." He sighed, shaking his head. "Sometimes strapping it, I realize it."

"Clearly, I'm always convinced that Tenou has a precise design in mind and is trying to fool you," he insisted, and Michiru frowned. "The word fool makes me understand how little consideration you have of my will, Samuel." She told him rough. "It almost seems like Haruka can plagiarize me at any moment without me being able to do anything about it."

A faint smile curved Samuel's lips.

"You know I don't think so. I have a lot of appreciation for your intelligence, which is why I'm pretty sure you didn't sleep together, despite trying to make me believe otherwise. "He approached the girl a little, bending towards her.

"I think it was a provocation, as I suppose that perhaps what I have mistaken for attraction is just a deep affection for a poor Christ only as a dog, you are trying to re-enter in a context of almost normal life. " Samuel remained a silent for a moment. "Probably even in light of what happened to your-"  
"I grabbed. " interrupted Michiru. "And Haruka is not a poor Christ just like a dog. "  
"If you say so, " was ironic the other, which resumed after a moment of silence. "What I want to say is that Tenou, a zotic and arrogant snotty, probably he will beat all your good intentions and will feel authorized to slip into your pants sooner or later. "  
Michiru did not answer, aware that the truth was exactly the opposite: from her trousers Haruka had literally escaped. _Always_. "It will trample your feelings, Michi, you know it will."  
 _Michi?_  
For a moment she was perplexed by the nickname given. A nickname that was not new to her, but with which very few people had called her.

"Zombie and arrogant bragging ..." she repeated slowly, and smiled when a thought struck her. "Samuel, do you know what _Durlindana_ is?"  
The other looked at her, perplexed, jumping the connection between her words and those of the other doctor. Then he shrugged. "No. Is it something you eat?"  
Michiru needed that answer to get up from the bench and, hand in hand, return to the sliding doors that made up the entrance to the Dewenish. It was not long before she heard Samuel's footsteps follow her, and the figure of the neighboring doctor again. "Come on, Michi, what else should I do? I'm sorry-"  
"First of all, you could stop calling me Michi." She froze it through the doors. "And then you could end up taking advantage of every opportunity to insult Haruka."  
"I'm just trying to help you."  
The girl did not even turn to those words, and the amazement was painted on her face when she felt herself seize by the wrist and turn abruptly. "Do not ignore me, Michiru, it's something I can not stand."  
"Samuel, leave me." She called to him when she recovered from surprise, glancing first at the hand of the other clutching her wrist, and then at the atrium, where some of them cast curious glances at the scene.

"What do you want to do, a place in the hospital? They are watching us all."  
"Let them look." Foster murmured, and increasing his grip on his wrist approached the girl. "I care about you, give me a chance, Michiru, even as a friend."  
"You're not looking for friendship, Samuel, you're looking for a possession," she replied, jerking her wrist.

"And it is really shabby that you come to make me the moral intentions of a person you do not even know, professing you so different when it is clear how the crystal who is here, who wants to slip into my pants."  
"Do you know what crystal is clear, Michiru?" The realization struck Foster, who just grasped his gray eyes, which became a crack. "That I had definitely overestimated you: it probably has already drowned you in. Tell me," an ironic smile curved his lips. "I can not call you 'Michi' because that's what he calls you, when you fu-"

"Let me guess ... _That_ would be me, Dr. Foster?"  
Michiru's hand was already ready to impact Samuel's cheek, but the familiar voice behind her stopped her: she turned to cross what she knew would be two green irises, and Foster also looked up from Michiru's face to see who he was behind the other. Both were observed in the reflection of the mirrored lenses of Haruka's Ray Ban.  
"You talk about the devil," Samuel was ironical without leaving the doctor, and a slight smile was painted on Tenou's face.

"Never comparison was more fitting, Doctor."  
Michiru perceived a tinge of bitterness in the affirmation of the other, which then surrounded her waist with one arm. Surprised by the gesture, Samuel loosened his grip on the wrist and the girl took the opportunity to tug it away, and then feeling a slight pressure on her side let Haruka bring it closer to her body.  
"Much better," she murmured, and Michiru tasted that close contact that immediately reminded her of another; launching a quick glance behind her, she realized how Tenou's arrival had attracted numerous inquisitors, including patients and staff, to the scene itself rather embarrassing.  
"Come on Haruka, we are giving a show." She pulled her back, grabbing her by the sleeve of his dark shirt, reluctantly releasing the embrace, but was stopped by the same weight as Haruka, still motionless.  
"Go. Go with your knight without stain and without fear," was Samuel, the words full of irony. "Where did you leave the armor, Major Tenou?"  
Haruka was silent again, and a faint smile appeared on her face.

"Ah, doctor, doctor," she began to say, shaking her head. "I really want to hope not to have to watch such a scene anymore."  
The smile did not fade from her face, and Michiru identified that friendly mask that Haruka was so good at wearing, and of which there was only fear.

But Samuel did not understand it: stepping forward, his chin raised in open challenge, he approached Tenou. "Are you threatening me, Major?"  
The other smacked her lips in disagreement, then pulling out the Ray Ban to hook them to the first button of her shirt. "No, Samuel." The green irises planted on the gray ones of the doctor. "I'm just giving you some advice."  
Eyes lingered for a long moment, and the smile again bent Haruka's mouth when the other tried to mask the glaring movement of his Adam's apple intent on swallowing the bitter morsel of defeat.

A slight pressure on the arm by Michiru made her understand that it was not necessary to rage on the corpse, and let herself be carried away by the girl: when they entered the elevator, they still felt the intrigued glances and murmurs that had accompanied the whole scene in the atrium .  
"Fantastic," the doctor cried once protected from the elevator walls, covering her eyes with her hands.

"From tomorrow the whole hospital will talk about it."

"I do not think I've ever been very nice to him," Haruka began, putting her hands in her pockets as she leaned against a wall, thoughtful. "But after this Foster will make my doll voodoo."  
Michiru nodded. "I would have managed, but thanks for intervening."  
"Ah-ah, I saw." The other ironic agreed.  
Silence accompanied the journey to the chosen floor, then Haruka sighed. "You know Michiru, I think I've made an evaluation mistake."  
The doctor inclined her head. "What do you mean?"  
"Foster seemed like a good guy, or I would never have stuck you to get you out."  
"So you learn to settle me at all costs," she joked, but returning to look in the green irises of Haruka found no trace of irony.

"Stay away, doc."  
Michiru found the tone with which Haruka told him nothing but encouraging. "Well, after this wonderful exit, looking for him was just the last of my thoughts."  
The elevator doors opened, and Haruka brought her hands from the side pockets to the backs of her jeans as they walked out into the corridor.

"The way he looked at you did not like it at all."  
A strange euphoria rose in a corner of the doctor's mind at the idea that those words were taken with them, and once inside the office she waited for Tenou to come in, before closing the door with her weight, leaning on her back. "What is it, Major, are you jealous of Samuel?"  
The other smiled, and picked up the small recorder connected via the audio socket to the laptop.

"No, I'm not jealous," he looked for his gaze. "It's something that, grant me the comparison, is not in my ropes."  
Michiru's lips also leaned upwards, despite the euphoria had disappeared with the same speed with which it had arrived. "This deal is antediluvian," Haruka told her, putting it back next to the computer, and the other shrugged. "For what I need, it's just fine."  
"What's inside?"  
"I'm talking about you." She revealed them passing by, to sit at the desk and start unplugging the recorder to put it in the bag. "Speaking of our psychotherapy sessions helps me to better stop the concepts, and I need them for when I prepare the reports for Mamoru."  
Haruka raised an eyebrow. "So I guess Chiba knows everything I've always told you."  
"Dr. Chiba is in a position to be able to ask me anything inherent in our interviews," she began to explain, while the other took off the books from the bookstore and gave them distracted looks, before putting them back in their place. "But he does not, and I do not tell him more than necessary."  
"Why?" Haruka seemed genuinely curious.

"Because here we are beyond the doctor-patient relationship, Haruka." Michiru told her. "You are my friend, not just a case to be treated."  
Haruka sat in front of the girl, and stretched her long arms over her head. "Yeah, and how many of your friends stick your tongue in your mouth when you least expect it?"  
The doctor felt her heart skip a beat, and tried to hide the surprise that came from that sentence: it was the first time that they were talking about it. Then she inclined her head. "You did not put my tongue in my mouth."  
"I tried to," she thought for a moment about the word to use. "Stalk you."  
Michiru smiled, putting a hand to her chest with fake disdain. "Oh yes, my knight, but luckily I was on the chastity belt."  
She got up from her chair and walked around the desk to sit on the edge next to the other; Haruka glanced quickly at the doctor's crossed legs a few feet away from her, before returning to look at her.  
"Since when did you express yourself as if I had eaten a chivalric poem?" She joked the doctor, and Haruka shrugged, leaning on her desk with her elbow to meet Michiru's gaze. "I'm glad you managed to get over it, doc."  
Michiru looked at her extended face, the vanished circles. And that dark blue shirt that gave her in an indecent way ... _Michiru, not wandering,_ mentally scolded himself. "I've already explained it to you, Haruka, and ..." she paused.

What was she supposed to say? What had passed over just because at this point hse preferred to have her as a friend rather than deprive himself of those small contacts that had become necessary?  
What had happened to us because it was clear that the other had been a mistake, a behavior dictated by events? Haruka had been clear: she needed their friendship. Not her. From whom that sentiment came, it was completely irrelevant.  
From Tenou's eyes she realized that she had probably remained silent for too long, and decided to throw her on irony. Just like the other was doing. "And I assure you, during the university I have seen worse."  
 _Is it so easy to lie?_  
Haruka chuckled, and narrowed her eyes inquisitively. "By the way, explain to me a little about this party thing in the dorms. I'm really curious. "  
Michiru hit her shoulder, coming down from the desk. "Perverted."

"It is in these cases that I regret not having done the College," was the other dramatically, extending a hand to lift the clip that held the photograph on the desk.  
"How do you feel?" Michiru then asked her, leaning towards a drawer of the office furniture and extracting a letter from her.

Haruka shrugged. "Well, I would say, the fact that I can sleep is already something doc, is not it?"  
"It's a lot." She agreed with the doctor, reassembling herself. She put the letter aside, the hidden header in Tenou's eyes. "Have you had more nightmares?" she then asked, opening a clipboard.  
Haruka thought for a moment. "No, I do not think so."  
"And projections of imprisonment?"  
The other did not immediately answer. "Sometimes."  
"It's normal, we'll work on it." She watched Haruka put away the clip with the photo, which came back to open up to her sight: she was drawing it with Hotaru in her arms, the little girl sporting a pair of veil wings fixed on a green onesie.  
"We took it on her birthday." Michiru explained to her, and Haruka leaned back with her elbows on the desk.  
"When is Hotaru's birthday?"  
"In January, six, precisely."  
A smile bent Haruka's lips. "It does not surprise me, the best are born in January."  
Michiru closed the lock, and slipped the pen into the shirt pocket. "That would also explain why Hotaru worships you literally, she just asks when she can go back to your house."  
"How can you worship me if you do not even know me." She retorted the other in a flat tone.

"And then I thought I was negatively influencing it."  
Michiru inclined her head. "She's very attached to Luna, she never leaves that doll, she thinks when she woke up, she panicked because she thought we'd left her alone."  
The connection escaped Haruka. "IS...?"  
"Well, she left it of her own free will to keep you company, and have no more nightmares."  
Tenou did not answer, and a slight sigh left her lips: Michiru sensed that the other should not be too happy with this realization.

"Speaking of parties, the thirty of this month is the birthday of both Usagi and little Chibiusa. Mamoru told me that he would like you to come. "  
Haruka thought about it.

"I can not give gifts." She said after a moment, and Michiru rolled her eyes. "Very sorry, I'll take care of the gift, and I'll say it's from both of us."  
"Is that why you called me today? To talk to me about a birthday, and how much Hotaru is fond of Luna?"  
Michiru shook her head, and let the letter slip on the surface of the desk until it was in front of Haruka. "No. I called you for this one."  
"Mmh ... Did someone write me a love letter?"  
The doctor nodded. "It's the answer to our request for permanent leave, Haruka, it arrived this morning."  
"Oh." It was all that came out of Tenou's lips, the face devoid of any expression. Before adding after a long moment, in which she never moved to the letter:

"And what is the verdict, your honor?"  
"I do not know, I just called you to open it, I would never have allowed myself to do it."  
Haruka returned her attention to the envelope, and when she saw it she saw over her name, the army coat of arms, and, at the top left, the heading of the Pentagon's health office, which dealt with that kind of practice.

"Open it, come on." Michiru encouraged it, which actually thrilled more than the other: if the leave had been refused, they would not have had the time to submit new documentation, and Haruka would soon leave again. On that, probably, she would not have been able to get over it.  
After a moment of hesitation Tenou quickly opened the letter and got up from the chair: she threw the empty envelope on the desk and, taking a few steps to the side, began to read the single sheet that contained it.

Michiru also stood up and it seemed that time was freezing, while she was looking for any clues with Haruka's impassive face. Which, after an interminable instant, snapped her lips.  
"What does it say?" Michiru almost could not hear her own words, so loud was the beating of her heart. She watched Haruka put the paper on the desk and, after looking for the other's, shrugged. "IT says I have to find a job."  
It took less than a minute for the doctor to process the meaning behind that sentence, and a broad smile was printed on her face. She made a real violence to not embrace Haruka, and decided to turn her attention to the document: with a quick glance she came to the lines that interested her.  
 _'... in light of the documentation presented, the request for permanent leave submitted was accepted. Therefore Major Haruka Tenou, born in Washington D.C on January 27, 1980 is reformed by the Military Service and ... '._  
"My father will come out of his mind," Haruka murmured. "I can not understand what could have happened."  
"I told you it was not he could have resisted this. "Michiru approached her, her eyes sparkling with joy." It's great news. "  
"I do not know if I agree," Haruka huffed, but Michiru put a hand on her arm.

"Now you have your life in your hands, Haruka." She told her in a smile, and the other shook her head. "Wait to sing victory, Michiru." The General will not let me pass that way. "  
"Send him here, talk to me and Mamoru. He will have to surrender to the evidence."  
But a loud 'pff' came from Haruka's lips. "Tropic Thunder giving up, it would really be the Apocalypse, doc."  
Michiru did not grasp. "Tropic Thunder?"  
"Takeshi Tenou, 'Ti'-' Ti '." She explained, raising an eyebrow. "They called him that way in Vietnam ... ridiculous, uh?"  
"No, but illuminating, in a sense." The girl agreed, as Haruka slipped the paper from her hand.

"It's incredible," she whispered rereading the lines printed in Arial on the white paper. And Michiru was surprised when crossing the green irises of the other, there was a certain loss. "What am I doing now?"  
" _Baby steps_ , Haruka." The doctor reassured her. " _Baby steps_ , and a good start would be to come to Usagi's party."  
The other did not react immediately, then Michiru watched him put a hand on the back of the jeans, pulling out a small leather wallet.

"What are you doing?" She asked when she saw the American Express suspended in mid-air between them. "I contribute to the gift."  
"But imagine, I'll take care of it."  
"I insist."

"Who's out of work now?"  
A smile bent Tenou's lips. "I will continue to receive my salary for a while, doc, do not worry about it, and be careful I read the statements, so I would notice if I bought you the latest Manolo Blahnik."  
Michiru shook her head and took the paper from Haruka's hands. But only to swerve it in the side pocket, after approaching her: she clearly felt the other stiffen at that gesture.

"You told me I would never have your money." She said softly, tilting her head. Haruka looked at her inquisitively, putting her hands in her pockets. And Michiru did not expect her to approach her again, crushing her between her body and the desk, stretching her arms to rest them on the edge of the piece of furniture and brushing her sides.

"I also said that you can not do the _femme fatale_ , but only stupid people never change their mind."  
They sat in silence for a long moment, then Haruka stepped back and the doctor allowed himself to breathe again.

She watched her take the car keys out of her shirt pocket.

"What time do I have to come for therapy?" She then asked her, and Michiru went to fetch information about the plan they had established to deepen certain points of the story in her darkened brain.

"At three." She communicated them trying not to betray any emotion. Haruka nodded. "Let me know if Foster gives you other problems, okay?"  
"Look, I can handle it myself, too."  
"As you wish, you have missed an opportunity to take advantage of my innate kindness."  
Michiru smiled, and when the other was gone she put away the precious sheet arrived from the Pentagon, which still lay on the desk, inside the envelope, intending to put it in Haruka's file: it was so that he noticed the silver credit card inserted between the computer and the table lamp. And she promised herself not to let herself be bewitched by Haruka's affectionate outbursts: she had never experienced illusions.

She certainly would not have started now.

 _"Edward Dewenish VA Medical Center" Military Hospital_  
 _Portsmouth, Virginia,_  
 _June 21, 2008,_

 _"There must be some kind of way out of here/ Said the joker to the theif/ There's too much confusion/ I can't get no relief._ "  
Jimmy's hands hit hard on the piano keys, with no respect for the instrument and even less for the ears of the two unfortunate listeners with him in the Music Therapy room.

Michiru smiled observing the total commitment that the boy was putting in his execution, and pinned in her own block as, despite the permanent damage to the brain, he remembered without losing a blow every word of the song.  
"You know James, I do not think _'All along the watchtower'_ makes the piano the same way," Michiru joked, overlooking the jumble of notes produced by that. "But we could try to rearrange it."  
"We buy a beautiful Fender Stratocaster, instead, give me a straight line." The dark boy burst out, sitting next to the bookshelf on which books and scores were placed. "So we can play all the Hendrix we like, James. What do you think?"  
The boy ignored her, continuing his execution.

"Will you give us a good word with Dr. Chiba, Dr. Kaioh?"  
Michiru turned to him. "Well, Tyler, as a Dewenish music therapist, if you think it's appropriate that the hospital needs one to say the least expensive electric guitar," she winked. "I will not be able to do anything but endorse your request."  
The boy smiled, then stood up as he untied his ponytail to restore it better.  
"All along the watchtower," Jimmy continued loudly, and Tyler sat down next to him on the piano stool. "Hey James, do you know that this song was from Bob Dylan, how about doing some old Bob?"  
Jimmy shook his head, passing to the next stanza. "Come on, let's play _'The times they are a-changin' 'We have to change, or Hendrix - peace of his soul -_ will turn in the grave."  
Michiru got up from her chair, placing a couple of books on the shelf.

"I do not think you can make him change his mind." She checked her watch before resuming.

"We've finished here today, Tyler, see you next Tuesday with James."  
She took the boy by the arm, who had now moved on to _'Vodoo Child'._ "Do you need help with him?"  
Michiru shook her head, smiling. "No, James is a gentleman, is not he?"  
"Galantuomo, yes." He repeated that, nodding.

Tyler smiled, then crossed his arms to his chest. "Speaking of gentlemen," he began to say. "Is it true that Foster and Major Tenou came to the lobby for you?"  
 _Bingo_ , she thought, a distressed expression on her face and the awareness that she was the clearer day's specialty in her mind.

"Please, Tyler."  
He raised his arms. "I was just curious, they all talk about it in the hospital."  
"Well, they talk bad about it: they did not come to the hands, there was only an argument."  
"Anyway, I would worry." Michiru raised an eyebrow, and Tyler continued. "Think about it: Tenou, Foster, the nurses will join forces against you."  
Michiru could not help smiling. "From the ' _Death to the Austrian_ ' series?"  
Tyler smiled too. "More or less."  
The doctor sighed and after saying goodbye, she went through the corridor, clutching the clipboard to her chest, James arm in arm, reaching her office.

"Okay Jimmy, I collect my stuff and bring you back to your room." She told the boy, letting him sit down.

"I have to go to Hotaru's school for a meeting, do you remember my daughter?" She asked him, showing him the picture on the desk. James picked up the clip with the image, but he forgot it in an instant when he saw something much more interesting: stretching out his hands he grabbed the doctor's voice recorder.

"No Jimmy, do not touch." She scolded him good-naturedly by pulling the object out of his hands, and a bitter smile bent her lips thinking how the interaction with the traumatized twenties was so similar to the one she had with Hotaru.  
She took out the recorder's microcassette, on which was written the report of the last dialogue with Haruka who had finished listening to the report to be given to Mamoru, then putting it in custody, every action followed by James's curious look.

She picked up the bag from the desk and put the stand back, along with other old reports that had been lying on her office furniture for several days and were waiting to resume their way home.

"Doctor, do you have candy?"  
Michiru shook her head. "No candy, Jimmy, or you'll have a stomach ache like last time."  
"But I want sweets!" The boy whimpered, and Michiru rolled her eyes, "Just one, okay?"  
The doctor began to rummage in the bag when a quick knock at the door caught her attention and she did not even have time to answer because Mamoru had already appeared on the threshold.  
"Michiru, what's going on?" He seemed quite altered. "What's this about the fight in the hall?"  
"Oh my God, Mamoru, not you too." She approached his friend, moving away from the desk, the bag and the search for sweets.

"There was no fight in the hall!" She blurted exasperatedly. "But who puts these rumors around?"  
"Everyone," said Chiba seriously, crossing his arms to his chest. "Anyone in the hospital talks about it."  
The girl shook her head. "Nothing happened, Mamoru, believe me, the matter is already settled."

"Foster says that Tenou threatened him." He suggested the other, getting the doctor's wide eyes in response.  
A thud drew the attention of the two doctors, and she turned to see what had happened: James was probably chewing a whole pack of gummy candies from his bag, which lay on the ground along with some of its contents.  
"Haruka has not threatened anyone." She pointed out, taking a few steps to the side and then bending over to pick up the objects.

"And I bet Samuel deliberately omitted the fact that he behaved like a total asshole."  
"That's why I'm here, to ask you how things went between Foster and Haruka."  
Upon hearing _'Haruka'_ , James began to shake his head, eyes veiled in sheer terror. "No! Haruka no!"  
"Why are you doing this?" Chiba asked worriedly, but Michiru shrugged.

"Jimmy is scared of Haruka, I have a couple of theories about it, but honestly it's a reaction that remains inexplicable."  
She finished putting the items back in her bag, and causing James to get up from his chair, she turned back to Mamoru.

"Listen now I just have to run away or I'll be late for school, there's a fund-raising party and they asked me to help out."  
"I think it's already there," the man informed her, who then tilted his head. "Do you make sure I can feel comfortable?"  
"Trust me, Mamoru, it's just that those two do not like each other, and they do not do anything to hide it."  
Mamoru remained pensive for a moment.

"You told me you were just _'a game',_ for Tenou."  
"And I still am." She told him in a smile.

Chiba knew what had happened at Haruka's house. He knew that the Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome of the other had been triggered by a series of psychological violence that Haruka had repressed. But he did not know about Samira and the horrors she had been forced to witness: if she ever wanted it, it would be Tenou to talk to him about it.

And in the same way he did not know about the kiss between them, but certainly not for a question of trust. Of that it would have made no sense to talk about it.

"I'm still a game for Haruka," she repeated laconically. Always, and only, _a game_.

' _The King' Lounge Bar,_  
 _Virginia Beach, Virginia._

The notes of a languid jazz bounced among the dim lights of the hall.  
In one corner, on elegant little sofas of white leather, a couple murmured words only known to them in their ears, occasionally casting glances full of promise.  
She glanced at the soft organza curtain, which concealed the cocktail lounge in the eyes of those sitting in the bar, before returning to stare at her Jack Daniels.

With a slight movement of the wrist, she jingled the ice cubes inside.  
 _The King is dead. Long live the King_ , she mentally said to herself, before draining the entire contents of the glass and grinding her teeth, in the illusion that the burning in the throat and stomach would be exhausted in less time. Without detaching the elbows from the counter, and without abandoning the curved pose that he had already used to, she left the empty glass on the polished wood, then nodded to the barman for another.  
Michiru had seemed calm to her.

Their therapy continued, and they slipped on each other as if nothing had happened. But after all, how could it be otherwise. What had she told her? _A completely natural channeling of the emotions that stirred you inside._  
Going back in time, and trying to remember all her conquests, she judged that no one had ever given such a scientific and cold explanation to her kiss.  
It was a polite way not to tell you plainly that you _sucked her_ , she whipped her finger into the wound in a voice in her head, and snapped her lips, taking the new glass of whiskey between her fingers.

 ** _Your doctor. Your beautiful straight doctor, with a lot of baby_.**

 _But how the fuck came to your mind?_

Overloaded another voice at the first sip of Jack. She judged that, perhaps, smoking some _grass_ before going out had not been a great idea.  
She noticed the small group of girls who had looked for a while. She looked at the time on the phone, and estimated that within ten minutes the first would come forward.  
 _Put your heart in peace, Tenou. For Michiru you're just working._

She took another sip. The princesses seek principles, she mentally repeated herself.  
Then a thought came back overwhelmingly, driving all the others from her head. Touching her shirt at the breastbone, she clearly felt the shape of the army identification plates.

She had continued to bring them more for a habit than for a real need.  
A long chapter of her life was closed, and all she could do was wait for _Hurricane Tenou_ to fall on her. Michiru had made it easy, but she did not know her father. Haruka hoped with all her heart that the girl should never know him.  
And, of course, now she had no more excuses. She could no longer hide behind an imminent departure, or the fact that the incandescent sand of the Iraqi desert could have swallowed it at any moment, something that had come very close.  
Put roots, establish links.

She glanced over her shoulder at the table where the girls were sitting, and noticed that one was missing. She shook her head: _would it have come up to ten?_  
 ** _One. Two. Three. Four. Fiv-_**  
"Hello."  
The ice jingled in the glass when she placed it on the counter surface, before turning to look at the author of the greeting. She was the blonde, with little breasts but an ass talking. _Well, you can not have everything from life, right?_  
 ** _Also because the only one you would like, now, is at home with your daughter_**.  
"My friends and I have made a bet," she began to say, and Haruka rolled her eyes at the excuse as old as the world, perhaps more.  
"One says you're married, the other you're still engaged in. I say you're available." She approached her a little, and when she leaned against the counter, the already short dress still rose on her thighs.

"The first two do not exclude the last one." She told her flatly, and she smiled.

"So I'm right."  
"Maybe."

"What's your name?"  
"I do not think you really care about it."  
The girl sat next to her with studied indifference, and soon a cocktail arrived. Haruka could hear the shouts of victory of her friends from there.

"Do you come often to ' _The King'?_ "  
"No it's the first time." She revealed them, scanning the level of the liquor, which was lowering onto her glass. "This explains why I've never seen you before."  
"Maybe I do not like being noticed."  
The blue eyes of the other, the elongated shape accentuated by a stroke of black pencil passed by expert hands, were crossed by a sparkle.

"So Nature did not do you a favor."  
"I always say that too."  
 _If you are a joke of nature, then it is nature that has something wrong._  
The image of Michiru appeared overpowering in her eyes; the hand of the other wiping away her tears. Shr shook her head and brought the glass to her lips, and even the blonde at her side sipped the cocktail. "You come often, I guess."  
The girl inclined her head, surprised. "How did you get it?"  
"The bartender brought you drinks without even asking."  
Shr saw her approach her again. "You are an observer."  
"It depends."  
"And from what?"  
A corner of Haruka's lips bent upwards. "If what I observe interests me."  
That did not immediately answer. "And let's see, I'm interesting?"  
"A bit'."  
She had it. She hung on her lips. She felt her approaching her face, and start talking to her in the ear.

"Maybe I can do something to turn on a little more yours," touched her with her tongue. "Interest?"  
Haruka felt her hand slip down her thigh, and stopped her before she could see anything.

"I do not know." She turned to look at her. "Do you like surprises?"  
"I love surprises."  
She stroked her lips with her own, but Haruka felt that it was different. For the first time, it seemed almost wrong. An aquamarine reflection filled her eyes, and instead of stopping her, she sent a powerful surge of excitement into the circulation.

"Then I'm the person for you." She said to the other, taking her by the hand and making her stand up from the stool. She threw the money of the consummation and the tip on the counter and without other words pulled the blonde behind him, while the hope of annihilating any fantasy on her doctor was made, even for that evening, more and more feeble.

 _"Edward Dewenish VA Medical Center" Military Hospital_  
 _Portsmouth, Virginia,_  
 _June 22, 2008,_

He was going through the corridor that led from the hospital to the offices when she saw Lara, one of the nurses on the floor, sitting on one of the plastic chairs in the waiting room, holding a rather agitated James Beouford.  
"Is there any problem?" Churches, and the girl turned in surprise in the direction of the voice; Jimmy did not even turn around. "Oh, Dr. Foster, it's her."  
"What happens?"  
The girl shrugged. "James has to do the CT scan, today, but as usual when he sees the contrast liquid syringe he starts to get agitated and he's terrified of the injections."  
Samuel nodded, and Lara continued.

"So we're waiting for Dr. Kaioh, to give us a hand."  
Feeling the name of Michiru, Foster snapped his lips. "And since Dr. Kaioh has hypnosis?"  
Lara smiled. "I do not think she has any, but it's no secret that James has a weakness for her, so we hope he can keep it quiet for the time it takes to inject the contrast."  
Samuel shook his head, and crouched in front of James. "Do you like Michiru, Jimmy?"  
"I want to marry her," was the one automatically, nodding. Foster inclined his head.

"Even." Then he added, murmuring. "Happy you."  
James did not answer, and when the boy lifted his legs to bring them to his chest, curling up on the chair, Samuel noticed the clenched fist spasmodically around something hidden from his sight.  
"Damn, right now." Lara moaned at the phone ring from the psychiatric ward, and the doctor returned his attention to the nurse.

"Is there no one who can answer?"  
"I should do it. The other girl is on pause and I was in the guardhouse before they called Radiology for the question of James. "  
The man remained silent, then took out one of his white smiles. "Go ahead, Lara, I'll take a look at James."  
"It's safe?"  
"Sure, I have nothing to do at the moment."  
The girl shot up. "It will not take long. I'll be right back."  
When the other was gone, Foster took his place next to Jimmy.

"What's in your hand, James?" He asked him quietly. "Do you show it to me?"  
But that shook his head. Samuel became thoughtful.

"Let's see, what do you say if I'll give you," he began to rummage in his coat pockets, and after a moment he took out a semi-new package of chewing gum.

"These, I think it's a fairer exchange."  
James looked alternately at his fist and the chewingum for several times. "Will you give it to me?" He then asked the doctor about the package, but did not seem inclined to leave the object in his hands.

"Only if you show me what you have there."  
James thought about it, then slowly opened his fist: at the sight of Foster a microcassette opened, of those suitable for audio recorders. Once he used them too, shortly after the end of the University, but no longer found any use of it had decommissioned its use.

Among other things, he evaluated, on the market, they could not even be found with the cassette support, replaced by recorders with flash memories, connectable and transstable without so much flapping to a PC.

"Where did you get that?" asked Foster, and James smiled.

"Dr. Michiru."  
"Ah, Dr. Michiru," he repeated, the curiosity that began to run his brain like a woodworm.

With a quick movement he took possession of the box, leaving the chewing gums in place. "Give it back!" James burst out, but Samuel swerved backwards.

"We exchanged, James, and you do not want me to tell your sweetheart to steal her things?"  
He put the object in his pocket, just before Lara made her appearance again.

 _"Stupid!"_ Jimmy was cursing, and the nurse looked at him puzzled, then turned his gaze to Samuel who was rising from his chair.

"It's his way of thanking me for giving him some candy," he explained, shrugging his shoulders, while the other kept shouting at him. _"Stupid! Stupid!"_  
"It's strange," Lara was surprised. "He usually does not react like that, in fact, he's always kind enough."  
"In fact, what did you do to him, Samuel?"  
Both Foster and Lara shifted their attention from James to the source of the voice, and watched Michiru sit next to James, then put an arm around his shoulders, stroking his face to calm him.

"It's stupid." James reiterated, and Michiru laughed. Even Lara could not help herself, but she stifled the laughter at the sidelong glance Foster gave her.

"You know Samuel, I think the simple soldier Beouford framed you perfectly."  
"Ah, fun." Foster was ironic, who then glanced at the clock. "Well, do you know what I'm saying, I'm leaving, I have to pack too."  
"Finally they move you?" Michiru asked, but Samuel shook his head. "No, I'm going to Baltimore, there's a congress on the use of benzodiazepines in the treatment of insomnia, and Chiba wants me."

"Not bad as a punishment," joked Michiru, knowing that in most cases this type of events were held in luxury hotel facilities, and despite the succession of conferences, it ended up still to stay several days to enjoy every comfort.

"It had been agreed before our little argument, but at least for this week you'll be able to cry a lot on Chiba's shoulder as well as on that of Tenou, _Michi_."  
He specifically emphasized the nickname, and Michiru narrowed her eyes.

"I think I'll leave," Lara burst out, feeling decidedly too much, but Samuel stopped her. "No, I'm leaving, I wish you a good day," he said cordially.  
He walked down the corridor to the elevator, turning the microcircuit stolen from Beouford in his pocket.  
" _Stupid_ ," Jimmy repeated when he no longer had Samuel in his field of vision, ripping a further smile at Michiru. Which then began to hear from Lara the problem that had required his presence.

 _Portsmouth, Virginia,_  
 _June 30th 2008,_

She was sitting in a corner, holding a glass of non-alcoholic drink in her hands, and alternating between the house and the back garden, both teeming with children and adults.  
A couple of kids passed by, chasing each other, raising in their movement some of the many balloons that covered the floor of the house, and that after a fluttering climb began a lazy fall.

Before one touched the ground she stretched out her leg and gave it a side kick, moving it away.  
She spotted Usagi, a party hat on her head, serving guests of all kinds of goods: hse smiled thinking back to when she had opened the door, welcoming her by blowing at full power into a trumpet of paper.

Shaking her head, she considered that growing old and growing did not necessarily go hand in hand.  
She saw Hotaru arguing with the other party of the day, and in a flash of conscience she wondered where Artemis was: she felt totally sympathetic to the cat, hidden somewhere to escape the brats.  
She glanced at the plant that flanked it and considered throwing in the alcohol, so the vegetable did not look great already. She made to turn around when a plate of pink paper, filled with sweets, pretzels and anything else, invaded her field of vision; following the hands that held it, she found himherself self looking into Usagi's blue eyes.  
"For you, I thought you were hungry."  
Haruka raised an eyebrow, then unloaded the other from the weight of the plate.

"Thank you." She murmured after a long moment. She realized with dismay that the other was sitting in the chair next to her, and shifted her attention to the contents of the plate: a pair of shapeless shapes browned her face.

"What are these?" She asked, and Usagi smiled sheepishly, putting a hand behind her head.

"Oh, they're biscuits I made, they burned a little, but they're good."  
Haruka did not answer right away. "They look like something they gave us at the camp cafeteria a couple of years ago when I was in Iraq." A second was absorbed. "It all intoxicated us."  
Usagi grew tense. "Seriously?"

Haruka nodded, then put it in her mouth. "You did not have to eat it by force."  
"I like challenges," joked the other, winking at her.  
Usagi leaned her elbows to her knees, watching Haruka swallow the product of her culinary arts still to be refined.

"You know, you really have a nice car." She then said to her, tilting her head a little to look at her.

"I already wanted to tell you from the other time, I'd never seen it like yours."  
"It's a limited edition."  
The girl looked curious. "It must have cost you a bang." She said as she was almost thinking aloud. And when he realized it, she put a hand to her mouth.

"Sorry."  
Haruka smiled. "It 'does not matter." Then she gave a slight sigh.

"The salary of an officer is quite high, and a lot of money goes on my head, including risk allowances, transfers, insurance and trust funds." She took a sip from the alcoholic, regretting the absence of a good old Bourbon.

"And having never owned anything, for years I have only had income, and zero outputs." She paused. "Get the damn taxes."  
The other laughed, and even Tenou looked at her amused.

"Even as a child, money has never failed," she continued to say, coming back serious. "Nothing else was missing, but no, never, I saw the General one, maximum twice a month, and I quarreled all the time, but we had a pool, a domesti-"  
"The general?" Usagi interrupted confusedly, and Haruka nodded.

"The General is my father."  
"Oh, he's the one who organized an early morning party here at home a couple of months ago."  
"Yeah, Takeshi does not have much respect for people, I'm living proof of that."  
"Mamo-chan told me something." The other muttered, and then looked back at Haruka. "You really can not call him dad, uh?"  
Haruka looked at her with evident disappointment, and ate another cookie. "You were right, it's not so bad." She then said, snatching a proud smile at Usagi. Silence crept in between the two, filled with the cheerful vocals of the children and the carefree little talk of the adults.  
"It's really beautiful, is not it?"  
The words of Usagi caught her unprepared: following her gaze, she found herself observing Michiru, who, sitting on the sofa, listened amused to whatever Hotaru was telling her, straddling her. She decided not to answer such a potentially dangerous question, but the other continued undeterred.

"And it's so sweet with Hotaru, not to mention how good it is to play an-"  
"Serena (Usagi)." Haruka stopped her, attracting the girl's curious look. "I thought you were Michiru's friend."  
"Of course I am."  
"So why are you trying to place it?"  
Usagi looked at her for a long moment, then blushed. "Here, I thought that ... Well, what-"  
"Yes, I like women." She took her away from the embarrassment. "But it does not mean that I like all women, indistinctly."  
"Are you telling me that you do not like Michiru?" She seemed incredulous.  
Haruka returned to look at her doctor, who had full vision now that she had stood up. She wore a light blue flowered dress, up to her knees, and the suspenders in the veil on the top left her arms uncovered. She estimated that that simple summer dress was beating her up with the dress Michiru had flaunted for the evening at the Four Seasons, and that she often returned to her thoughts. _Which, half of the time, were not exactly chaste._  
"You do not know me, Usagi." She then told her, evading the question.

"I did terrible things, if I were you, I would do anything to keep her away from someone like me."  
Usagi glanced quickly at Michiru.

"Not to mention that we should consider Michiru belonging to my team, something that is constantly denied by that wren down there."  
The other remained absorbed for a second, then sighed.

"Michiru knows?" She asked her then. "Michiru knows these terrible things you say you did?"  
 _Samira, the loculus._ _The violence._ It was a flash in his eyes, which disappeared as it had come. And Haruka nodded, after a long moment. "Yes, she knows."  
"Well, I do not think you think you are such a horrible person, otherwise you would not be here with us."  
Haruka tilted her head to look at Usagi, who continued. "

She's my friend and I trust her, and I do not know what you did, but honestly I do not even care, and you know why, because I do not really care about Michiru either."  
A slight smile curled Haruka's lips, which shook her head. "My case has been taken very seriously, I can not deny that she is an extremely kind girl."  
"Kindness has nothing to do with it, I can assure you, Haruka, that you did something to her." A smile bent her lips upwards. "Since I've known her, Michiru has always protected Hotaru in a way that is nothing short of morbid, yet she brings the baby to your home, lets you interact freely, have you ever thought about it?"  
"Since when has Hotaru been able to socialize with her mother's friends?"  
Usagi dropped her arms.

"You deceive hundreds of people every day, Haruka, what makes you believe that Hotaru, on the other hand, has understood that you are a woman?"  
Haruka knew that the girl believed her to be a man, and tried not to grasp the implications of what the girl was telling her.

"Have you known her for long?" She preferred to ask. Usagi thought about it. "Since she started working with Mamoru, four years, more or less."  
"And you never were jealous?"  
The girl remained silent for a long moment. "I'd be lying if I said no, I mean, look at it, and I was pregnant, I had terrible fears and I felt a cumbersome solid urban rejection. My self-esteem, near her, was completely dissolved. "  
Haruka laughed, and even Usagi's lips bent upward. "Then Mamo-chan organized a dinner, I met her, and I realized that I really had nothing to fear."  
A thought struck Haruka, and she could not help herself. "Why was she already married?"  
Usagi looked at her sideways, and Tenou hastened to add: "With Hotaru's father."  
"Do you mean Mitsuo?" The other seemed perplexed.  
 _Mitsuo! Mitsuo Kaioh!_ The realization of the name and surname of the other invested it in full, remembering finally.

Her office in Mosul filled her thoughts, as did the image of the Sergeant, standing before her with the license sheet in her hand, who did not stop telling her how he had known his wife, who had been married a few months before leaving for the Iraq.  
"Mitsuo was a soldier too," she told her, and Haruka nodded.

"I know it was under my command, in Mosul."  
Usagi's eyes widened. "You mean you too-"  
"No, they moved me before the attack." The girl relaxed, and sighed. "That was really a blow. Fortunately, in the collapse of one of the barracks, a kind of bag of oxygen had been created in the rubble, and they found it after two days. It was badly tanned, but at least it was alive."  
Haruka moved to the chair to approach Usagi. "So he did not die in Iraq?"  
The other looked at her confused. Then she crossed her arms to her chest. "But Michiru has never told you anything?"

Haruka recalled the meanness with which she had tried to antagonize her, touching that sore point.

"She does not talk about it willingly and some time ago I used this story to hit her and hurt her." Tenou revealed to her, and a slight exclamation of astonishment emerged from Usagi's lips.

"From that day on I did not ask her anything, because I understand perfectly how it feels when everyone wants to know something from you, but the last thing you want is to talk about it."  
The other did not answer, then hit her legs with the palms of her hand. "Listen, Major Tenou. If she did not say anything to you, I can not for sure tell her that- "

She froze, her face turning to purple when she realized that Haruka's face was approaching hers. "-I."  
"Not even if we find an agreement?" She asked her in a dangerously low voice. Usagi swallowed loudly, and after a few moments Haruka burst out laughing.

"Come on, I was joking ... Continue."  
"Well it was not a good joke!" The girl burst out, clearing her throat with two light coughs, trying to dissolve the embarrassment.  
"Do not fall, Usagi, Haruka does so with everyone."  
Michiru's voice caught their attention, and they watched her approach her.

"Tell me you brought me some Bourbon or Jack Daniels." It was Haruka pleading, but Michiru leaned toward her, shaking her head. "There is only water for you, lots of water."  
Haruka groaned, leaning against the back of the chair and letting the back of her head rest even so gently against the wall.

"Usako, the cake!" Called from a corner of the living room Mamoru, and Usagi noisily brought her hands to her cheeks. "

Oh no, it's still frozen! Oh no!"  
She literally ran away, and both Michiru and Haruka looked at her, as they disappeared into the kitchen.

"I am always firmly convinced that every time I come here, there are hidden cameras," Haruka said, and Michiru smiled and sat down next to her, where Usagi had been until a few moments ago. "I saw you, you know, that you were threatening Usagi."  
Haruka did not take her head off the wall, but turned to look at the girl. "I wanted to see how it was corruptible." Michiru did not grasp the connection, and decided to steal a little cake from her plate.

"You look like you want to be anywhere, except here."  
"I do not feel very comfortable, but I know I'll have to get used to it, I mean," hse looked for Michiru's gaze. "From now on my normality will be terraced houses and barbecues in the garden, rather than camps, marquees and barbecue in the desert, no doc?"  
Michiru frowned.

"Does it weigh you so much that you do not have to go back there anymore, do not you have to risk your life any more?"  
Haruka did not answer, and the other sighed. "What were you and Usagi talking about?" She decided to turn the subject. "The fact that when she was pregnant she felt a solid urban rejection," Partially lied Tenou. Michiru snapped her lips in disappointment.

"Usagi was beautiful when she was pregnant. She was radiant. "  
"And how were you?"  
Michiru inclined her head, surprised by the question. "I'd like to see a picture of you pregnant. Probably you were, too," _beautiful_. "Well, you were like her."  
The doctor looked at her for a long moment, then touched the collar of the short-sleeved polo shirt.

"I like how you are," she told her alone, and a smile bent Haruka's lips.

"What does it have to do with my question?"  
"None, it was just a thought."  
"Did you hope that by giving me a compliment, would you receive one?" demanded Tenou, but Michiru shrugged.

"No. Better death, than to say something nice, right?" She asked in a smile.  
Haruka shook her head and could not reply because a noisy call came to her ears. She saw the balloons split at the passage of Hotaru, not even the waters of the Red Sea before Moses, and after a moment the child was clinging to her leg. "Hi Haruka!"  
Tenou puzzled her.

"Ehy wren, you do not go unnoticed, uh?"  
Hotaru laughed and behind hher appeared Chibiusa, who saw her friend make that action felt authorized to imitate her.

"Look Michiru, I have two new boots," Tenou joked, when both girls were around her shins.

"Happy birthday, miss," she said to the birthday girl. "How old are you?"  
The child had to think about it for a moment, and began to raise the fingers of her right hand to help the mental account. And all that attention paid to Chibiusa did not please Hotaru, who by stretching one arm - and holding firmly to Tenou with the other - began to try and pull the girlfriend from Haruka's leg.

"Come on Chibiusa! Haru is my friend, not yours! Come on !"  
Michiru smiled, and Haruka looked for her dismayed look.

"Haru?"  
"Yes, she calls you that, and then with the 'u' elongated end, like howling." The girl explained to her, who then poured herself into an example. "I told you she likes you."  
Haruka grimaced, before returning to address her attention to the clash between the Titans just below her knees.

"Chibiusa! Chibiusa, come, we're going to bring the cake!" Called the girl a middle-aged woman with long dark hair, but rather youthful, who put her hands to her hips when she saw the child clinging to Haruka's leg.

"Oh baby, do not stick to people's legs, come to your grandmother," she lifted her up, while the little girl waved her hand to Haruka, four fingers raised.

"Four, I'm four!"  
"Good evening Ikuko," Michiru greeted her, and she realized the girl's presence. "Michiru! I had not seen you!" Then she glanced at Haruka. "Who is your companion?"

"Major Tenou Haruka, honored." Haruka stood up, shaking the woman's hand, not before placing the plate on a nearby shelf. "She is Usagi's sister, I guess."  
Michiru rolled her eyes, and Ikuko blushed, bringing a hand to her face; Haruka smiled remembering the same gesture made by Usagi when she had met her.

"Sister! Kenji! Where's Kenji when they make me a compliment?" She moaned, then turned back to look at Tenou. "Actually, I'm Mom, Major."  
"I would never have said that," she pretended amazed, and Ikuko turned back to Michiru, a gloating smile on her face.

"Oh, Michiru, I've always told you that you have good taste."  
Michiru just blushed at that sentence, and Haruka returned to watch Hotaru still firmly anchored to her shin.

"Are you going to be there all day?"  
At the vigorous nod of Hotaru, Haruka scratched her head. And a thought struck her.

"Ehy nana (wren), I have something for you in the car."  
The child opened her purple eyes wide, immediately detaching herself from Tenou. "What's this?"  
Even Michiru was curious, and followed Haruka who was heading towards the entrance of the Chiba house, with the child trotting behind her to keep up with her.

Once outside the four arrows flashed, she indicated that Haruka had turned off the Viper's alarm, and when Tenou opened the door, Michiru stopped in the driveway, incredulous: in the passenger seat of the powerful sports car sat … _Luna_. Tied up with a seat belt.  
She watched Hotaru jump into the seat to retrieve the puppet, with Haruka crouching beside her, and observing that strange feeling, the same feeling she had felt when she saw Hotaru and Tenou on the bike, she came back.

And that did nothing but increase her confusion.  
"Mom, look, Haru brought me Luna!" Called the child, running to hold on to the edge of Michiru's dress. "She says she no longer has bad dreams."  
"Hotaru told me that when she has nightmares, she sleeps with you." It was Haruka approaching and closing the car, and the doctor nodded.

"Yeah, but I try not to get used to it"  
"You did not understand." The other interrupted her, an innocent expression printed on her face. "I'm afraid the child suggests that you and I should sleep together."  
Michiru raised her eyebrows, a faint blush rising to color her cheeks.

"It's always too easy to make fun of you." Tenou said after a long moment, shaking her head and going past it.  
A chorus of voices inside the house began to sing _'Happy Birthday'_ , and when Michiru began to walk back down the path, a few steps away from Tenou, she could not help sighing.

 _ **A game, Michiru. Remember that**._

 _"Edward Dewenish VA Medical Center" Military Hospital_  
 _Portsmouth, Virginia,_  
 _July 1, 2008,_

"Colleen."  
"Hyperactive."  
"Richard."  
A smile bent Haruka's lips. "Naive."  
Silence saturated Hall 4. "Samira." Michiru then said, and the other raised her head from the chair, taking her eyes off the ceiling to look for the doctor's.

"It's strange."  
Michiru tapped the pen on the block. "Haruka, the exercise provides an adjective for each name that I tell you." She scolded her, and Tenou raised a hand.

"I know, but it's weird to hear you say her name, so far she's always been just," she paused. "Only mine."  
A certain resentment crept into a corner of the doctor's mind as he wrote.

"You can use it if you believe." She told her then, and Haruka tilted her head, confused. "The 'mine'"  
But Tenou snapped her lips. "It was just her idea, Michiru, I wanted everything, unless Samira was mine."  
"As you told me, she wanted exactly the opposite."  
Haruka remained silent and closed her eyes, thinking back to all that Samira had been.

Also in Michiru's mind was the image of a female figure with long dark hair and mahogany-colored eyes, so deep that they could fall into it. She's gorgeous. Because, she was sure, Samira must have been gorgeous. Outside and inside, for what she had done.  
"She was very young, and confused." Haruka began to say. "I did not want to have any regrets, so I kept her away from me, and for a long time I thought her was just an infatuation due to the fact that I had pulled her out of that house."  
"She loved you, Haruka, and she would have loved you in all circumstances." Michiru tried to smile at her. "She loved you, not what you did to her."  
"Do you think it makes me feel better?" The Haruka churches, green eyes crossed by a flicker of rage.

"The question was wrong upstream, you did not have to fall in love with me."  
"But do you believe that love can be rationalized, Haruka?" The girl was perplexed. "Do you think that if I had ordered you not to love someone the way you ordered your men to march, would you put yourself to attention and turn your heels?"  
"I had almost done it, spending a lot of time with Richard."  
"Have you ever grasped the idea that she was doing it to be closer to you?"  
"Of course it touched me." Hushed Haruka. "For this I was clear, and I told her not to make him suffer."  
Michiru did not speak for a long moment; only one question to turn them over, but without finding the courage to get her out. "And you, did you suffer, Haruka?" She asked her then.  
Tenou looked for the doctor's eyes, and the green irises planted on the blue ones of the other.

Silence filled the room, then Haruka closed her eyes, tilting her head backwards to leave her on the back of the chair. "I do not like this game."  
"Samira has never betrayed your secret, Haruka. She tried to take you away from the scene of the attack and," she decided to be brutal, "she practically prostituted herself so that they would not hurt you."

Now the banks were smashed and had to face the issue openly if they wanted to overcome it, for this she had opted for the hard line. Michiru watched the other bite her lower lip, but remain silent.

"She has clearly told you she loves you, and her actions do nothing more than validate this thesis, but you must understand that you are not responsible for this, it is not your fault, Haruka, that she loved you in such an all-encompassing way. . "  
"We have not finished yet?" She asked the other one dry, looking back at her. Michiru glanced at the clock, then flicked the pen.

"We have finished for a quarter of an hour," she told her with a puffy smile. Haruka's eyes widened.

"Bitch." She hissed through clenched teeth, and Michiru stood up.

"Insult me as much as you want, but we'll go back to the subject until you get into that empty head that the black hole, as you like to call yourself, does not really exist."  
"Do not agree with me." Haruka challenged her, standing up in turn. "And tell me that you ask me questions just to do."  
"It's nice to feel complimented." Michiru joked, but the other did not seem conciliatory.

"How's the job front?" She decided to change the subject while throwing open the door invited her out of Room 4, or the other would be stubborn on their discussion, remaining in a bad mood all day. Haruka released one of her grunts, scratching her head.

"I got a couple of letters from Washington," she told her after a long moment of mulling. "Both from the Pentagon One says that with my experience I could be an excellent Logistics Consultant for Operations on the Territory, the other that, given my curriculum, I would be perfect for a position of Responsible for the Reorganization of the Resources of the Maintenance Poles For the Light Armament, they do not even look bad, if only I knew what they meant. " She added after a moment. Michiru looked at her sideways.

"Would you like to continue working for the Army?"  
"And what else could I do, Michiru?"  
The girl smacked her lips in disappointment. Then she sighed. "Well, at least it's not Iraq."  
Haruka put her hands in her pockets, and extracted the Viper's keys from the right one.

"I need a babysitter," proposed Michiru when they were in front of the elevator, and Tenou raised an eyebrow. "What happened to the catatonic?"  
"There is still, but from today Hotaru is home for the summer holidays, and poor Jenny is also in the morning."  
Haruka smiled, and a thought struck her.

"Another thing has arrived, along with job offers," she revealed to her. "A package containing my medical records, I think it's the documentation they talked about in the letter."  
Michiru raised an eyebrow. "That was to come to us, since it also contains the relationship with the clearance of the leave." The doctor pouted. "Why was it sent to your house?"  
Haruka shrugged. "I have no idea, I'll bring it to you tomorrow."  
But she saw Michiru begin to unbutton the gown with her free hand from the block.

"No, I'm going to get it right away," the doctor told her. "You were the last one today, I can even go home." Tenou frowned, then shrugged.

"As you want."  
"Did you have to do?" The Michiru churches, and at the other did not escape the ironic nuance.

"No. You're always welcome," she replied ironically with irony. After a quick stay in her office to get the bag and leave the gown and her notes, they went down to the lobby and left the hospital. And when Haruka saw Michiru looking for the keys to her car, she shook her head, an evil smile curving her lips.

"No, no, go up to the Viper today."  
The doctor raised an eyebrow, putting her hands on her hips. "What is it, a revenge?"  
"Are not you afraid?" Tenou gallantly opened the door when they were next to the car  
Michiru did not answer: she preferred to hold out her hand and allow herself to be accommodated in the leather seat.

"So, how do you think?"  
They stood still at a traffic light, and Michiru felt rather relaxed despite the unbalanced speed the other had held up to now.

"Not bad," she allowed, and Haruka smiled, pressing the accelerator down: the roar of the Viper roared her satisfaction. Michiru looked at her, one hand on the steering wheel, the other on the car's gearbox.

The reflection of the sun on her blonde hair and on the corner of Ray Ban's frame, leaving behind a gleam. "You know, you're extremely," _sexy_. "Confident of what you do."  
Haruka bowed her head in her direction.

"I told you doc, I know my business, and you seem much more comfortable than on the bike."  
"Here I have solid sheet metal around." she accompanied the words with the knock on the massive frame of the car. She took the green and the Viper darted forward, while Michiru abandoned herself on the seat, glancing furtively at Haruka, focused on the guide.

And it returned. _That shiver on my back, that warmth on my skin._  
The excitement returned, and she could not keep a moan of frustration from her lips.

"Should I go slower?" Joked Haruka into hearing the sound, totally misrepresenting the reason for that painful rattle.

"No, come on in. I am amazed that we have not yet taken off," the girl stayed in the game, equally relieved and disappointed that the other had not grasped the true meaning.  
Michiru felt the car lose laps and slow down at the sight of the condominium of Bay Street, and Haruka put the arrow, then approached the access bar of the external parking lot: she passed the remote control on the photocell, and that rose. But as he entered the private area, he spotted a black sedan with darkened windows on the other side of the road.  
Haruka braked, surprising Michiru. "Why did you stop so suddenly?" The girl asked her, but the other did not take her eyes off the rearview mirror. She watched the sedan start again, and after a moment the Viper started moving again.  
"It seemed to me," Tenou started, but then she shook her head. "Nothing, I must have been wrong."  
Michiru looked at her for a long moment, and once parked she got out of the car, breathing a sigh of relief when she was no longer in the cockpit, which meant only close contact with the other.

She watched Haruka open the small back door and lift a couple of shopping bags: feeling Michiru's curious look on her, she spread her arms.

"What is it? I did some shopping before going to the hospital."  
The doctor laughed at the image of a ' _Haruka lost with his trolley in the corridors of the supermarket, and waited for the other to approach it before heading towards the entrance of the building_. Tenou started to insert the key when the door opened, and imagined that the concierge had seen it coming.  
"Excuse me for a second, I have to talk to the porter." She told Michiru once in the hall of the building, resting the two bags on the ground. "You can call the elevator in the meantime."  
"Um, okay." Agreed Michiru, approaching the elevator that, noticed by the rapid succession of descending numbers on the display, was coming to the floor.

And in fact, after a moment a guy came out in a suit and tie and a shoulder messenger bag that greeted her, but that after a few steps - and above all having last Tenou inside the guardhouse - stopped. "Are you the girlfriend?"  
"You are welcome?"  
"You are the girlfriend of the top-floor dude? Of the military?"  
Michiru looked at him puzzled. "I do not-" But she paused, intrigued by the motivations that had driven what was, in all likelihood, Haruka's neighbor asking her that question.

"Is there any problem?"  
"Well, tell your boyfriend that there are people working here, and you can not go out with rock at full blast at dawn."  
Michiru's eyes widened in surprise.

"Has it happened many times?" She then asked, and that inclined his head. "Just a couple, but I'm telling him to keep it from happening again."  
She saw Haruka coming out of the guardhouse, the Ray Bans now hanging from the first button of her shirt, and exchanging a cordial and cold greeting with the guy, who was leaving.

"What did he want?" She asked Michiru as she entered the elevator, retrieving the envelopes.

"Why do you listen to loud music early in the morning?"  
Haruka tilted her head sideways, scowling as the elevator began to climb. "I do not believe it. He was complaining. "  
"You are asked to answer."  
"It was a bad time." She only told her. "Now I can sleep, remember?"  
"When did it happen?"  
"Just before the 'Four Seasons'."  
The realization struck Michiru. "Well, you could have called me instead of antagonizing the whole building."  
Haruka did not answer right away.

"I thought about it, actually, but I was still in the denial phase."  
They remained silent, then a smile folded the doctor's lips. "He thought I was your girlfriend."  
The elevator stopped with a 'ting', and as the doors swung open, Haruka stepped out. "Well, I bet someone thought You're gay. "She paused." To be honest, it's true. "  
They approached the front door, and Tenou put the key in the lock.

"Ready-made sushi?" Michiru began to say, peering into an envelope she had taken from her hands, stepping into the doorway behind Haruka.

"Buy sushi ready when I can ma-ahio!"  
She had not noticed Tenou's abrupt arrest, beating her directly on her back; with one foot he hit the envelope that the other had dropped on the floor.

"Haruka, what the hell ..."  
She took a step to the side, and looking for her eyes she saw something that, until then, she had never seen and could not believe could ever see in the girl's green irises: a veil of fear shadowed the eyes of Haruka, who stood property.

She saw her swallow.  
She followed his gaze, and jumped when she noticed the presence further ahead of them two.

A man in uniform was sitting at the dining table, the headgear leaning against the shiny crystal of the furniture next to a large open envelope, and he leaflessly leafed through a set of sheets held together by a needle in the upper left corner . His face was tanned, marked by deep wrinkles around his eyes and his broad forehead; two long parallel scars passed through his left temple, to then get lost just above the ear in his brush-cut white hair.

He did not seem in the least troubled by them, and after observing even the last sheet, he placed the document on the envelope and raised his face in their direction: when Michiru caught his eye, the magnetism of two green irises nailed it on the spot without appeal. The military rose slowly, putting his hat under his right arm: Michiru immediately registered its significant height and impressive physique.

She heard Haruka stiffen at her side, and murmur something.  
In a few steps that covered the distance between them and then stood before Haruka, which was higher than the head, and Michiru slid her arm between the body and the limb of Tenou, then making a slight pressure on the hollow of the elbow; the girl did not move, supporting the man's gaze with equal intensity.  
Then it was all very quick: the military man raised his left hand and in a fast movement the back of the one impacted Haruka's face. The impact was violent enough to turn her head, but remaining well planted on the feet.  
"Haruka!" She called Michiru, and she saw a trickle of blood coming out of Tenou's lower lip, a drop staining the mirrored lenses of the sunglasses.

"But how do you allow it?" Shouted, putting heself between that and Haruka. And feeling a pygmy, there in the middle.

But the military did not deign to look at her. "I'll be at the Hilton until tomorrow night, Haruka, I advise you not to wait." He said in a tone that did not admit replies.  
Haruka did not answer, and putting on her headgear the man passed over the two girls, disappearing beyond the door. Michiru was petrified.  
"Fuck you." Tenou murmured her teeth clenched, and the doctor faced her, brushing her split lip.

"It was," she began, but he already knew the answer. A bitter smile was painted on Haruka's face. "You just had the honor of meeting the Chief of Staff of the United States Army, Michiru, General Takeshi Tenou, my father."

 **Hello my dears, I'm so sorry for not being able to update that soon, but as I said, I'll try to put at least a chapter per month, that is. I enjoyed writing this, well more propery translating, still, I was able to set free my imagination. Focusing back on the chap, you got the first real meeting with the famous Takeshi Tenou woow, from now on he also will have his important role in 'helping' Michiru to help Haruka, though as Michiru said: _baby steps._**


End file.
